Wedding Planning #4

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She is a relative believe it or not, but we aren't close. So sadly I have to just keep her at arms length rather than bin her off but that is it now for me tbh. Trust is gone and I'm not for being friendly anymore.
I don't think she ever had any intention of coming on the hen party and had just let it get so far to the point she had to make an excuse last minute. Has obviously hidden a few of us that follow her so that we couldn't see she was out that weekend and has forgot to unhide us.
I think for me, I'm just more annoyed about her hiding people in the first place. It really didn't have to be such a big deal and I would have understood she perhaps didn't have the money for the weekend away but was still able to go out for a few drinks at home.

Its a shame tbh as when she got engaged I was really looking forward to us chatting about our weddings together.. but you live and learn
Ahh I see, yes the fact that she went and hid you all from her story shows that she knew she was doing something wrong. Don’t let it shade your special time right now though, sometimes it takes a big event like this to realise who’s genuine and not!
 
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hello, my fiance and i are thinking about prenup. he said in uk it's more advisory base compare to like a contract in usa. things might also change when there are future children involved. so how does this work? do many people have prenup? i was the one who brought it up. i told him i would sign it.
 
She is a relative believe it or not, but we aren't close. So sadly I have to just keep her at arms length rather than bin her off but that is it now for me tbh. Trust is gone and I'm not for being friendly anymore.
I don't think she ever had any intention of coming on the hen party and had just let it get so far to the point she had to make an excuse last minute. Has obviously hidden a few of us that follow her so that we couldn't see she was out that weekend and has forgot to unhide us.
I think for me, I'm just more annoyed about her hiding people in the first place. It really didn't have to be such a big deal and I would have understood she perhaps didn't have the money for the weekend away but was still able to go out for a few drinks at home.

Its a shame tbh as when she got engaged I was really looking forward to us chatting about our weddings together.. but you live and learn
As someone who has cut family members off, I want you to know that it's okay if she's not at your hen or wedding if she doesn't appreciate you.

All too often family members take advantage of their blood ties to treat you like tit. All your wedding events should be the happiest days of your life, and I would hope you are surrounded by people who love and support you. This woman doesn't sound like she's worthy of the invite or the agg that she's causing you, wedding planning is stressful enough
 
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As someone who has cut family members off, I want you to know that it's okay if she's not at your hen or wedding if she doesn't appreciate you.

All too often family members take advantage of their blood ties to treat you like tit. All your wedding events should be the happiest days of your life, and I would hope you are surrounded by people who love and support you. This woman doesn't sound like she's worthy of the invite or the agg that she's causing you, wedding planning is stressful enough
Thank you ❤

She’s engaged herself so I would have thought she would understand how stressful things can be and how important it is for the numbers etc like don’t string someone along.
I’m over it now but that was it really for me, the trust has gone and I’m really not arsed if she doesn’t come to the wedding.
Quite a few people are shocked at how she’s been but it’s very telling of the person she is.
 
What is the etiquette on inviting co-workers? I have about 6 I want to invite as we’re a really close team and see each other outside of work. Is it ok to invite them with no plus one?
 
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What is the etiquette on inviting co-workers? I have about 6 I want to invite as we’re a really close team and see each other outside of work. Is it ok to invite them with no plus one?
I'm inviting co workers with no plus ones apart from one whose wedding i went to with my fiance. The only people getting plus ones are people who don't know anybody else at the wedding. If it's a team, they can all hang out together. Plus ones are sacred imo, don't want randoms who neither me nor my fiancé knows.
 
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What is the etiquette on inviting co-workers? I have about 6 I want to invite as we’re a really close team and see each other outside of work. Is it ok to invite them with no plus one?
I'd say it's fine, but I'm biased as we've done the same! We've only given +1 to people who wouldn't know anyone there. If you were to invite one or two coworkers, I'm sure +1 would have been appreciated but with 6 of them going, I'd say it's fine to not invite their partners!
 
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Brides, when would you say cut off should be for your guests to get back to you with their RSVP? Our wedding isn’t until march but our reception venue need to know end of January and I’m just finding it difficult to do a seating plan for the reception with still some guests outstanding. I don’t want to be too pushy either as I know lots can change between now and February.
I’ve made it so simple for people with QR codes so they can accept or decline… and one guest I posted they invite through their door, they’ve not let me know if they’ve got it and that was months ago :/

Our wedding is March btw! would have helped if i had put that
 
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Brides, when would you say cut off should be for your guests to get back to you with their RSVP? Our wedding isn’t until march but our reception venue need to know end of January and I’m just finding it difficult to do a seating plan for the reception with still some guests outstanding. I don’t want to be too pushy either as I know lots can change between now and February.
I’ve made it so simple for people with QR codes so they can accept or decline… and one guest I posted they invite through their door, they’ve not let me know if they’ve got it and that was months ago :/

Our wedding is March btw! would have helped if i had put that
Usually should be in line with the date your venue need final numbers and catering choices by. I’d go with end of January
 
Brides, when would you say cut off should be for your guests to get back to you with their RSVP? Our wedding isn’t until march but our reception venue need to know end of January and I’m just finding it difficult to do a seating plan for the reception with still some guests outstanding. I don’t want to be too pushy either as I know lots can change between now and February.
I’ve made it so simple for people with QR codes so they can accept or decline… and one guest I posted they invite through their door, they’ve not let me know if they’ve got it and that was months ago :/

Our wedding is March btw! would have helped if i had put that
If your venue need end of jan, I would give your guests till end of December. This way:
-you can reallocate these seats to people didn't make the original cut (if u want to). Eg I have some people I've invited people from abroad who I'm 90% sure won't be able to attend. If they rsvp no, I can use their space for some work colleagues who don't care if they get a last minute invite
-you can chase the stragglers. Eg if my mums brother weren't to RSVP by the agreed date, I don't think my mum would be very happy if I said he can't come because he didn't rsvp on time

If you give them the same date as when your venue, you have no time to flex. Juggling life as well as wedding planning is a nightmare so giving yourself some weekends before the venue deadline will help ease the stress

Send a reminder at the end of November telling people they need to RSVP by the end of the year. This should help remind people and by end of December you won't have to chase to many people. Life gets in the way and I'm sure you have a few guests that have forgotten rather than just being hole.
 
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If your venue need end of jan, I would give your guests till end of December. This way:
-you can reallocate these seats to people didn't make the original cut (if u want to). Eg I have some people I've invited people from abroad who I'm 90% sure won't be able to attend. If they rsvp no, I can use their space for some work colleagues who don't care if they get a last minute invite
-you can chase the stragglers. Eg if my mums brother weren't to RSVP by the agreed date, I don't think my mum would be very happy if I said he can't come because he didn't rsvp on time

If you give them the same date as when your venue, you have no time to flex. Juggling life as well as wedding planning is a nightmare so giving yourself some weekends before the venue deadline will help ease the stress

Send a reminder at the end of November telling people they need to RSVP by the end of the year. This should help remind people and by end of December you won't have to chase to many people. Life gets in the way and I'm sure you have a few guests that have forgotten rather than just being hole.
All of this. 🙌🏼

I did a first phase where I invited people who I thought would decline and then a second phase with people i knew would accept and then the spaces I’d filled from the first phase 🤣

I should note I had to chase my own dad for an RSVP but the jury is out on whether he’d forgotten or was being an hole 🤣🤣
 
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If your venue need end of jan, I would give your guests till end of December. This way:
-you can reallocate these seats to people didn't make the original cut (if u want to). Eg I have some people I've invited people from abroad who I'm 90% sure won't be able to attend. If they rsvp no, I can use their space for some work colleagues who don't care if they get a last minute invite
-you can chase the stragglers. Eg if my mums brother weren't to RSVP by the agreed date, I don't think my mum would be very happy if I said he can't come because he didn't rsvp on time

If you give them the same date as when your venue, you have no time to flex. Juggling life as well as wedding planning is a nightmare so giving yourself some weekends before the venue deadline will help ease the stress

Send a reminder at the end of November telling people they need to RSVP by the end of the year. This should help remind people and by end of December you won't have to chase to many people. Life gets in the way and I'm sure you have a few guests that have forgotten rather than just being hole.
What I've done is put a table at the back of the room and put the people on that who are yet to RSVP 😂

I just know people who think a whatsapp message a few months back will suffice 🙄

If people don't RSVP by the end of the year then how do you go about letting them know it's too late? I think I just assumed everyone would let us know one way or another.

I just feel at times I'm spending half of my planning worrying more about other people when the reality is if it were them in my shoes they wouldn't be worrying about me.
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Usually should be in line with the date your venue need final numbers and catering choices by. I’d go with end of January
I don't think I could leave it until end of January as that is cutting it fine for the venue I think :(
 
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Chase them all this weekend? It's the dead time between Bonfire Night and Xmas so they aren't overly distracted and might want to think about something lovely to look forward to 💓
 
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If people don't RSVP by the end of the year then how do you go about letting them know it's too late? I think I just assumed everyone would let us know one way or another.
This is what we're planning on doing based off what friends did for their weddings. We're only giving allowances for pensioners, if they use our rsvp link great, but if not, I'm just going to ring them to get them to confirm

Message before Month before rsvp deadline:
Hi,
Hope you're well

Were in the depths of finalising our wedding so are messaging you as our rsvp deadline is a month away (date here) and we havent heard from you via our RSVP link.

We understand plans can change so even if tou have told us before that you can cant attend, we wanted to give you the opportunity to confirm formally either way.

We'd love to have you on our special day so please let us know by ... as we have to confirm numbers with our vendors. If we don't hear from you by that date we'll assume you can't come

Love
Joanna and Mr joannablogs to be

Message week after the deadline no response heard:

Hi person who has no respect for my time or money

Hope you're doing well. We're messaging as we've had to confirm numbers with our venue and caterers

Since we have not heard from you by the commnuicated deadline, we have not put your name forward as an attendee, and will therefore not be at our wedding.

We hope you understand and that we can hopefully celebrate with you at a later time

Love
Joanna and Mr joannablogs to be
 
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This is what we're planning on doing based off what friends did for their weddings. We're only giving allowances for pensioners, if they use our rsvp link great, but if not, I'm just going to ring them to get them to confirm

Message before Month before rsvp deadline:
Hi,
Hope you're well

Were in the depths of finalising our wedding so are messaging you as our rsvp deadline is a month away (date here) and we havent heard from you via our RSVP link.

We understand plans can change so even if tou have told us before that you can cant attend, we wanted to give you the opportunity to confirm formally either way.

We'd love to have you on our special day so please let us know by ... as we have to confirm numbers with our vendors. If we don't hear from you by that date we'll assume you can't come

Love
Joanna and Mr joannablogs to be

Message week after the deadline no response heard:

Hi person who has no respect for my time or money

Hope you're doing well. We're messaging as we've had to confirm numbers with our venue and caterers

Since we have not heard from you by the commnuicated deadline, we have not put your name forward as an attendee, and will therefore not be at our wedding.

We hope you understand and that we can hopefully celebrate with you at a later time

Love
Joanna and Mr joannablogs to be
Thank you that’s a big help! :) I messaged someone yesterday and have still been blanked so I will have no issue now telling them the cut off is past and they can’t come. I just don’t understand why people can’t let you know.
 
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Hey! Does anyone have any experience or advice for getting married abroad?
Just starting the planning process for our wedding in Barbados and I’ve heard hiring a planner is the way to go, but they are sooo expensive! I’ve been quoted between £1000-£4000. I’ve found a lot of vendors myself online so I am wondering if there is any point in the expense? Am I missing anything I need to consider arranging in Barbados on my below list?

Venue (ceremony and reception)
Flowers
Cake
Photographer
Hair
Make up
Music
 
Hey! Does anyone have any experience or advice for getting married abroad?
Just starting the planning process for our wedding in Barbados and I’ve heard hiring a planner is the way to go, but they are sooo expensive! I’ve been quoted between £1000-£4000. I’ve found a lot of vendors myself online so I am wondering if there is any point in the expense? Am I missing anything I need to consider arranging in Barbados on my below list?

Venue (ceremony and reception)
Flowers
Cake
Photographer
Hair
Make up
Music
I’m getting married in Barbados also ☺
I honestly think you may be okay without a planner depending on where you’re getting married. If it’s within a resort they’ll have someone you can link up with who will help with some things anyway!
Your list looks good though, we are getting a videographer which you may want to add to your list.
 
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Hey! Does anyone have any experience or advice for getting married abroad?
Just starting the planning process for our wedding in Barbados and I’ve heard hiring a planner is the way to go, but they are sooo expensive! I’ve been quoted between £1000-£4000. I’ve found a lot of vendors myself online so I am wondering if there is any point in the expense? Am I missing anything I need to consider arranging in Barbados on my below list?

Venue (ceremony and reception)
Flowers
Cake
Photographer
Hair
Make up
Music
I got married abroad and didn't use a planner but the hotel venue basically had a planner included in the package price and they sorted out all of those things. Also not sure if you're actually planning to have the legal ceremony there or just a symbolic one. We just got married back home and then had the ceremony abroad but otherwise need to consider the legalities of it of course
 
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