Vignettes and Pets #6 Three Degrees of Separation

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No Horatio, you are NOT allowed to declare your undying love to my guest! Categorically no. Just get on pepper spray watch and stop being a silly billy!

Weeerrrllll girls I have successfully completed (almost) a week without my Emily! It’s been hard going I can tell you. I have written her the long list of things that have disappeared in the last week that I can’t find. It’s under the heading ‘Missing in Action’.
Teddy will be glad to see her back because he will only eat his Wolfworthy biscuits from her and barely anything at all from me. For the first time in 2 months he managed to jump up on the sofa and sit on my knee like he always used to last night! I was besides myself with joy when he managed it! It made me soooo happy.

I have done window watch myself this week. It’s where we go armed to the hilt with anti-cobwebbing tackle to check the windows in the house. This involves hand hoovering the dead flies too. My house is a nightmare for wild-life. It’s staggering what goes on in my windows. Attenborough should come and do a programme on it.

My son says he’s arranging for some minor decorating works to be done on the outside at the back next week and that he’s arranging a weed pulling exercise. I tried something new this year. I let my garden go wild with the wild pink geraniums I normally pull out and the celandines. I must say I rather like it. I will take a photo to show you later. The borders look very full. I just haven’t had the puff to do them this year but it’s been an interesting experiment. The bindweed is awful but so what…Worse things to worry about. It doesn’t have to be perfect - as my friend Peggy keeps telling me!! I have secretly revelled in the fact I have just let the weeds to grow this year. It’s a new one for me.

What news of Himself dear Havisham? Did your sister return and divest you of all her responsibility? Was she prostrate on the floor with bounteous gifts of gratitude to you? How goes it in Chicago? What have you cooked lately? I like to know these things. I have been eating toast and fresh fruit all arranged on a baby plate 🍽 with pictures of Old Mother Hubbard. It’s a left-over from my childhood and it shows OMH showing the dog her bare cupboard. I loved dogs even then…Sending hugs to dear Gem xx.

Hoping yesterday passed with no incident whatsoever @Miscanthus ! Not even one solitary blip! Nothing! Nada! Niet! Rien!

Come in @happyforest - your time is up - we need reports and news! We need them now if not sooner please! Love to Wilbur. X
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Wildflowers as ground over! Now there’s an idea…😜
 
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No Horatio, you are NOT allowed to declare your undying love to my guest! Categorically no. Just get on pepper spray watch and stop being a silly billy!

Weeerrrllll girls I have successfully completed (almost) a week without my Emily! It’s been hard going I can tell you. I have written her the long list of things that have disappeared in the last week that I can’t find. It’s under the heading ‘Missing in Action’.
Teddy will be glad to see her back because he will only eat his Wolfworthy biscuits from her and barely anything at all from me. For the first time in 2 months he managed to jump up on the sofa and sit on my knee like he always used to last night! I was besides myself with joy when he managed it! It made me soooo happy.

I have done window watch myself this week. It’s where we go armed to the hilt with anti-cobwebbing tackle to check the windows in the house. This involves hand hoovering the dead flies too. My house is a nightmare for wild-life. It’s staggering what goes on in my windows. Attenborough should come and do a programme on it.

My son says he’s arranging for some minor decorating works to be done on the outside at the back next week and that he’s arranging a weed pulling exercise. I tried something new this year. I let my garden go wild with the wild pink geraniums I normally pull out and the celandines. I must say I rather like it. I will take a photo to show you later. The borders look very full. I just haven’t had the puff to do them this year but it’s been an interesting experiment. The bindweed is awful but so what…Worse things to worry about. It doesn’t have to be perfect - as my friend Peggy keeps telling me!! I have secretly revelled in the fact I have just let the weeds to grow this year. It’s a new one for me.

What news of Himself dear Havisham? Did your sister return and divest you of all her responsibility? Was she prostrate on the floor with bounteous gifts of gratitude to you? How goes it in Chicago? What have you cooked lately? I like to know these things. I have been eating toast and fresh fruit all arranged on a baby plate 🍽 with pictures of Old Mother Hubbard. It’s a left-over from my childhood and it shows OMH showing the dog her bare cupboard. I loved dogs even then…Sending hugs to dear Gem xx.

Hoping yesterday passed with no incident whatsoever @Miscanthus ! Not even one solitary blip! Nothing! Nada! Niet! Rien!

Come in @happyforest - your time is up - we need reports and news! We need them now if not sooner please! Love to Wilbur. X
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Wildflowers as ground over! Now there’s an idea…😜
So pretty! Keep the pics coming! Horrible amount of weeds are coming through the gravel at the front. I shall keep each and every one for Mr MK’s return. Yes, dead flies on the window sill are nasty @Oops - I have the same.

Sister over for dinner last night with the kids. I had made lasagne but only enough for me and daughter so quickly made spag bol and garlic bread for the kiddies. Daughter went out to celebrate passing all her exams - relief all round.

Our girl in Chicago hasn’t got her results yet but fingers crossed. She’s doing fine now. She WhatsApp’d me a lot in the beginning but now there’s silence which is a good sign. She gets the EL into work but has to Uber home because it’s late and dangerous. However, it costs her two hours earnings plus.

Hubby back Sunday at 5am - asked if I’m coming out to the airport 😂 - that’s a hard pass! I will miss my single girl life. I’ve binge watched Netflix, read two books, cooked easy-peasy snack type bitties... so laid back..the one thing I haven’t bothered with is watching Elsie vlogs - don’t want to spoil my vibe!

Glad to hear our darling Teddy is full of energy again! Gem had two nights of sick tum so I was sleep deprived but she’s ok now.

Went to physio yesterday and, guess what, no needles! I could have hugged her. She says once every 5 weeks will do so great news there. I also hope that all went well for @Miscanthus yesterday too.

Emily is back soon. Yippee! Order must be resumed, Madam.
 
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Oh! I am ordering order! I am unanimous in this!

Great about the fabulous exam results! Your girls are just a credit to you. So bright and beautiful. Perfect! 💕

Sorry to hear about Gem. Give her TB’s undying affection and a big cuddle from her Auntie Oops…

I’m hoping Teddy ventures up on the sofa for another big cuddle today. He’s spent a lot of time with me in the garden and in his bed in the kitchen so far today. So a little subdued but ate some boiled ham.

Oh I sooo hope your shoulder/arm get better. Hopefully the treatments will come less and less frequently then. I can’t bear the thought of having nerves injected. That should be banned imho!

Yes - if silence from Chicago ( sounds like a good film title) it must mean she’s fully occupied and having a good time! Always a worry though. When my daughter went to NY I made her promise not to look up because people would know she was a tourist and steal her bag! The things you concoct in your mind…When I was in NY I looked up all the time and a police officer approached me to keep my pocket book closed. I had no idea that I owned a pocket book! 🤷‍♀️
 
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Oh! I am ordering order! I am unanimous in this!

Great about the fabulous exam results! Your girls are just a credit to you. So bright and beautiful. Perfect! 💕

Sorry to hear about Gem. Give her TB’s undying affection and a big cuddle from her Auntie Oops…

I’m hoping Teddy ventures up on the sofa for another big cuddle today. He’s spent a lot of time with me in the garden and in his bed in the kitchen so far today. So a little subdued but ate some boiled ham.

Oh I sooo hope your shoulder/arm get better. Hopefully the treatments will come less and less frequently then. I can’t bear the thought of having nerves injected. That should be banned imho!

Yes - if silence from Chicago ( sounds like a good film title) it must mean she’s fully occupied and having a good time! Always a worry though. When my daughter went to NY I made her promise not to look up because people would know she was a tourist and steal her bag! The things you concoct in your mind…When I was in NY I looked up all the time and a police officer approached me to keep my pocket book closed. I had no idea that I owned a pocket book! 🤷‍♀️
So funny! When I worked in the US embassy, some poor applicant who unfortunately ‘looked like a godamn Aye-rab’ rocked up having misspelled tourism for terrorism - well, the Marines took over every corner with sniper guns! At the time, I nearly cried laughing.

9/11 changed everything, of course. When in embassies and airports - leave your humour at the door.
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Aaaargh - did weeding today. Now there is a rewarding feel to getting the bugger by the roots but so disappointing when a stem 😪 I did one third and that’s enough ladies
 
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I am banning weeding. Hours of life wasted on frockers that boomerang back - overnight! No, wildflower ground cover is the way to go. I shaped my buxus balls today. They had grown massive. I have never done them before as always got one of my boys to do it. Today I decided I was going to breathe through it and do it or die! I will revisit them tomorrow when my critical eye comes back from a visit to the opticians.

Did I mention 3 hours of dead heading roses too?

It’s been such a good year so far for the roses. My Paul’s Himalayan Musk is better than ever this year. I adore the perfect clean pink rosebuds…

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I am banning weeding. Hours of life wasted on frockers that boomerang back - overnight! No, wildflower ground cover is the way to go. I shaped my buxus balls today. They had grown massive. I have never done them before as always got one of my boys to do it. Today I decided I was going to breathe through it and do it or die! I will revisit them tomorrow when my critical eye comes back from a visit to the opticians.

Did I mention 3 hours of dead heading roses too?

It’s been such a good year so far for the roses. My Paul’s Himalayan Musk is better than ever this year. I adore the perfect clean pink rosebuds…

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@Oops - for a terrible moment there - I read - you shaved your buxus balls.... 🥵🙏☹🤨🤨🤨
 
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Are you trying to kill me? I can’t breathe at the best of times 😂😂😂
 
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Have you seen my new book? It’s out today! It’s called “Buxus Revisited’.
I’m booking Castle Howard for the film and Jeremy Irons is already signed up to play the lead. Ho hum…
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I take it there are no roles for the Buxus caterpillar extras? 🤪
Madam! The eagle eyed amongst you may have noticed the pheromone traps ( 12 of the blighters) dotted around all the Buxus? It worked last year against brown tailed moth and I pray ( it’s all been re-pheremoned this season) it will get me/them through another year. If my Buxus go then I will deffo move! What do you think of my shaping? Not shaving - shaping! I will revisit over the course of the next few days to re-sculpt as necessary. I am lethal with a pair of shears - who knew?
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Please be advised I would now like to be addressed as Scissorhands - The gardener formerly known as Oops…

This is my symbol (cymbal)…

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Madam! The eagle eyed amongst you may have noticed the pheromone traps ( 12 of the blighters) dotted around all the Buxus? It worked last year against brown tailed moth and I pray ( it’s all been re-pheremoned this season) it will get me/them through another year. If my Buxus go then I will deffo move! What do you think of my shaping? Not shaving - shaping! I will revisit over the course of the next few days to re-sculpt as necessary. I am lethal with a pair of shears - who knew?
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Please be advised I would now like to be addressed as Scissorhands - The gardener formerly known as Oops…

This is my symbol (cymbal)…

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Your buxus balls are admirable, Madam. Shaved to perfection.

Funny enough, I have also been scissors happy today. I have cut lots of wardrobe items to modernise and very happy with results! No bonnets have been harmed in the process.
 
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Then we are both Scissorhandmaidens!

Two sets of shears and a packet of crisps please…

What else can we cut down to size d’you think?

Anyone got any old curtains?
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It must be your birthday soon Havisham! Gemini time again! Don't tell me we’ve missed it? We are air signs and if I’m not mistaken our Captain is Aquarius…
 
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Then we are both Scissorhandmaidens!

Two sets of shears and a packet of crisps please…

What else can we cut down to size d’you think?

Anyone got any old curtains?
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It must be your birthday soon Havisham! Gemini time again! Don't tell me we’ve missed it? We are air signs and if I’m not mistaken our Captain is Aquarius…
Two sets of shears and - hmmmmm - what flavour of crisps? I remember cycling home from secondary school and the major dilemma - cheese ‘n onion or salt ‘n vinegar ....... or, god forbid - to forfeit and go for a cadbury creme egg......??

Birthday been and gone - but thank you, beloved friend, for remembering! My idea of birthday heaven is - no cooking!

Shears - scissors - all fantastic. I love a raw hem anyway (very Margiela) so love chopping at will for the distressed look. Have any of you followed Amy Smilovic - founder of Tibi? She is incredible and I absolutely hold her up as the holy grail of style.

I’ll post a style class of hers. I mean, I know we come - us three degrees - from different creative approaches ie more landscaping for you both - but we are all creative so our style probably resonates? Her colour wheel is inspired and the shapes and designs are so modern/chill/architectural - I adore. Wait up, girls - I’ll post one or two.


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Oops - sorry guys - I’ll repost - something went wrong!

 
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I love Amy’s approach completely - I think it’s a very different sartorial vibe though, when you never change up the makeup /hair - I mean, great, but still - not very experimental? Trinny brings it completely- always brings a hair difference, a lipstick - a bangle - a more interesting vibe?


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Sorry, guys, for the onslaught - I’ve been deep diving into fashion, style, colour wheels since I got a little time off demesticity ). off to bed - good for younXxb
 
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My fave jumper of all time is a pink one by Tibi! I have worn it to death. When I go upstairs later I will take a photo of it to show you?

Oh FLOPPING flop! When was your birthday? I am so hacked off with myself for not saying it sooner because it’s been on my mind for ages. Grrrrrrrr! Happy Birthday for then darling one! 👑🎂🍸🥂🍰🍾Tch - you flick head @Oops...
 
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My fave jumper of all time is a pink one by Tibi! I have worn it to death. When I go upstairs later I will take a photo of it to show you?

Oh FLOPPING flop! When was your birthday? I am so hacked off with myself for not saying it sooner because it’s been on my mind for ages. Grrrrrrrr! Happy Birthday for then darling one! 👑🎂🍸🥂🍰🍾Tch - you flick head @Oops...
If I could afford one brand it would be Tibi - I would, like you, wear it to death. It’s a principal of buying the basics and not buying too many of the have to have goosebump purchases (my habit I’m afraid). The elevated basics by Tibi are the flopping dream, though. Nowt basic about them. They are so well considered and gorgeous fabrics.

I have been binge watching the Style Classes - hugely educational especially if you’re a Margiela/Balenciaga gal.

Don’t give a thought to the birthday - I didn’t! Trying to forget how old I am 🤨 but thank you for birthday wishes - you’re very kind ❤🥰❤🥰🥰
 
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Utter rubbish! Happy Birthday! Birthdays are so important! Huge love to you xx
 
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Ah, Jesus, what a day... he’s back with a BANG! What about the doggy do-do in the garden? Cobwebs - are you blind! 🙄

House is immaculate - whaaaatt? Back to earth girls - back to earth...... Never Marry. Ever. And if you were fool enough to do so - NEVER again, I know our @Oops gets a bit romantic now and again - stop it, Madam!


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@Oops - that means NO MORE talk of Jude Law 😡😡😡😡
 
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Give him a cobweb broom and tell him to do his worst with it!
Give him a bag for the other and then walk out of the door and tell him you’ll be back when you’ve attended the good housekeeping lecture at the local frocking pub!
Frocking Cheek!
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Jude agrees btw!
 
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