Vignettes and Pets #6 Three Degrees of Separation

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In case anyone’s interested in seeing my large pottery salad bowl here it is;

It occurred to me we could multi-purpose it into a begging bowl too. So I think we should commission the Christmas Camels again so we can traverse afar and meet up on a roadside where we can beg whilst wait for A Big Cinnamon Bun together. I mean it makes perfect sense…Didn’t we leave them somewhere in Hampshire when we were searching all of Hampshire for Captain? I’ll organise it and meet you on the Towcester Road. It will give us the golden opportunity to further rehearse our Three Little Maids song

A camel is for life not just for Christmas.

 

[Milking Keynes]

Girls - Havisham arrived yesterday at Castlemartyr - OMG - wonderful! I’m posting a few pics - the sauna is in the suite! In. the.suite...... what?? This is luxury at it’s finest! I’ll be wearing my Tesco dress tonight - every little helps

 

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Girls - Havisham arrived yesterday at Castlemartyr - OMG - wonderful! I’m posting a few pics - the sauna is in the suite! In. the.suite...... what?? This is luxury at it’s finest! I’ll be wearing my Tesco dress tonight - every little helps

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Yes and no doubt you will be flopping sleeveless when you use your fabulous sauna in this amazing place. So there you will be all sauna’d up wearing your lovely new frock and I’m here in a pair of pink flopping pyjamas doing yoga breathing ( because I can’t flopping breathe) - I mean just why can’t I have an amazing hotel suite delivered to my flopping door? I would be really good at Castle Martyrdom - I know this for a fact! I’m reporting this to the complaints department immediately. Flop off Jude, I‘m writing a rant. Go and do something useful…No! I said flop off!!

 

[Milking Keynes]

Yes and no doubt you will be flopping sleeveless when you use your fabulous sauna in this amazing place. So there you will be all sauna’d up wearing your lovely new frock and I’m here in a pair of pink flopping pyjamas doing yoga breathing ( because I can’t flopping breathe) - I mean just why can’t I have an amazing hotel suite delivered to my flopping door? I would be really good at Castle Martyrdom - I know this for a fact! I’m reporting this to the complaints department immediately. Flop off Jude, I‘m writing a rant. Go and do something useful…No! I said flop off!!

What are you talking about, Madam? If I lived in your beautiful house within your glorious surroundings... I wouldn’t have the time of day for Castlemartyr - I would turn my nose up at the thought.. I would politely decline the invitation... I would treat the place with the utter disdain it is due ... I would turn to Teddy Bear and roll my eyes... the nerve, I would confide - to invite us to this inferior destination? Hurrrmmmmph. I do not think so, TB.

 

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What are you talking about, Madam? If I lived in your beautiful house within your glorious surroundings... I wouldn’t have the time of day for Castlemartyr - I would turn my nose up at the thought.. I would politely decline the invitation... I would treat the place with the utter disdain it is due ... I would turn to Teddy Bear and roll my eyes... the nerve, I would confide - to invite us to this inferior destination? Hurrrmmmmph. I do not think so, TB.

Sorry - can’t hear you! I have put on my sack cloth and ashes as befits a Castle Martyr like what I am and will be walking ( backwards of course) to Canterbury as penance. Who will rid me of this turbulent non-sauna? Teddy, please go and gum your Uncle Jude - he’s really annoying me with his flopping stamp collection! Glue and stick, glue and stick from the time he wakes up until I start my martyring practise…

 

[Milking Keynes]

Sorry - can’t hear you! I have put on my sack cloth and ashes as befits a Castle Martyr like what I am and will be walking ( backwards of course) to Canterbury as penance. Who will rid me of this turbulent non-sauna? Teddy, please go and gum your Uncle Jude - he’s really annoying me with his flopping stamp collection! Glue and stick, glue and stick from the time he wakes up until I start my martyring practise…

Being catholic and brought up by an emotionally stunted group of nuns in the Churchtown region of Dublin, the Notre Dame order of - I dunno - carmelite something or other - I can highly recommend the self-flagellation method of martyrdom. You must be fervent, though, no willy nilly martyrdom here, and then fast for months at a time afterward. So soul cleansing. Walking backward to Canterbury a definite sole cleanser too especially when yelling the Novena throughout for all to hear. Megaphone the ultimate accessory - no suffering in silence - you must shout it from the rooftops to be a real martyr.... keep us posted! I love a good martyring practice...

 

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PUBLIC NOTICE.

Classes for Martyrdom for the emotionally stunted are available on a first come first murdered basis at the St Chortle on the Pikestaff church hall on the first Monday after your Epiphany. Soft shoes must be worn in order to protect the new carpark flooring. Flagellation flags will be provided. Pass me my megaphone Horatio…

 

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So…I sent of for my recommended by our dear Havisham face glow. I ordered 2 in case I ate one by mistake and lo and behold was kindly gifted a nice little box of freebies. Glow Fix, Super Dewy Liquid Blush, Translucent Powder and Pout Bomb lip gloss. I am delighted! I haven’t tried it yet but am certainly looking forward to it. I’m out for an appointment tomorrow morning so might give it its inaugural then !

Do you think this getting things for free malarkey might catch on?

 

[Milking Keynes]

So…I sent of for my recommended by our dear Havisham face glow. I ordered 2 in case I ate one by mistake and lo and behold was kindly gifted a nice little box of freebies. Glow Fix, Super Dewy Liquid Blush, Translucent Powder and Pout Bomb lip gloss. I am delighted! I haven’t tried it yet but am certainly looking forward to it. I’m out for an appointment tomorrow morning so might give it its inaugural then !

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Do you think this getting things for free malarkey might catch on?

I’m spitting feathers here, Oopsie. How unfair is this? I also bought a Bright Light face glow and got nada let alone a whole goody bag! How is this allowed to happen, pray tell? Aaaargh and you got lots and lots of yummy delights... I want them all.

I know the face glow is supposed - I assume - to be either worn alone or under foundation, I put mine on over my base simply because I wanted the shine strategically placed as have quite an oily t-zone anyway. So, forehead and cheeks but avoid nose and chin.

Did you get shade Medium or Medium light? I got ML as fair and it’s plenty dark for me. Dying to hear how you get on and what you think. Please review the other products too! I’m excited! The great thing is, if you don’t like anything, it didn’t cost too much.

I find the lack of testers since Covid makes it hard to not make mistakes...

@Oops - hope these yummy products work their magic. I love the face glow! Xxxxxx
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Eta - I put my specs on and see one of your face glows is in Med Light! Yay!

 

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I’m spitting feathers here, Oopsie. How unfair is this? I also bought a Bright Light face glow and got nada let alone a whole goody bag! How is this allowed to happen, pray tell? Aaaargh and you got lots and lots of yummy delights... I want them all.

I know the face glow is supposed - I assume - to be either worn alone or under foundation, I put mine on over my base simply because I wanted the shine strategically placed as have quite an oily t-zone anyway. So, forehead and cheeks but avoid nose and chin.

Did you get shade Medium or Medium light? I got ML as fair and it’s plenty dark for me. Dying to hear how you get on and what you think. Please review the other products too! I’m excited! The great thing is, if you don’t like anything, it didn’t cost too much.

I find the lack of testers since Covid makes it hard to not make mistakes...

@Oops - hope these yummy products work their magic. I love the face glow! Xxxxxx
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Eta - I put my specs on and see one of your face glows is in Med Light! Yay!

Absolutely dearest one! I took your advice and chose the colour you recommended. I will know tomorrow if it’s right. It might look a bit dark for me but will see how it spreads when on. I am sure it will be fine as I tried a bit on my hand. I think I got the goodies because I bought 2 on the Boots website so they gave the freebie for buying more than 1 ( I think). Very happy with my haul and thank you for recommending it xx
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Yes the testers used to be useful didn’t they? As you say it didn’t cost a fortune and we may well have found the solution to looking shiny like we’ve had Botox! ( just putting it out there that I will never have that frightening stuff injected into anywhere - EVAH!)

 

[Milking Keynes]

Absolutely dearest one! I took your advice and chose the colour you recommended. I will know tomorrow if it’s right. It might look a bit dark for me but will see how it spreads when on. I am sure it will be fine as I tried a bit on my hand. I think I got the goodies because I bought 2 on the Boots website so they gave the freebie for buying more than 1 ( I think). Very happy with my haul and thank you for recommending it xx
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Yes the testers used to be useful didn’t they? As you say it didn’t cost a fortune and we may well have found the solution to looking shiny like we’ve had Botox! ( just putting it out there that I will never have that frightening stuff injected into anywhere - EVAH!)

Never - EVAH! I have such an expressive face, it would be so obvious if I suddenly looked calm and demure... read frozen. Couldn’t afford it anyway ...

Last night of Castlemartyrdom..... drove the buggy all afternoon on the golf course and handed out 9 irons and putters... I’m about ready to go home now and see daughter and Gem. I just caught sight of myself in the mirror - waistline of a sumo wrestler - too much of the good life. Xxxx

 

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Never - EVAH! I have such an expressive face, it would be so obvious if I suddenly looked calm and demure... read frozen. Couldn’t afford it anyway ...

Last night of Castlemartyrdom..... drove the buggy all afternoon on the golf course and handed out 9 irons and putters... I’m about ready to go home now and see daughter and Gem. I just caught sight of myself in the mirror - waistline of a sumo wrestler - too much of the good life. Xxxx

No dear I have the waistline of a sumo wrestler. You look fabulous! Tch!
Did you loud hail from the buggy? I hope you did and also as soon as you get back home please ensure Himself personally unwraps the cobweb mops Captain and I have sent for him. He’ll be thrilled…

 

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Ode To A Cobweb Mop…

Oh precious mop and cobweb fighter
The nemesis of crawly blighter
I give to you a firm saluting
As hammock webs will be commuting
Unto thy lofty dusting powers
Thus saving wrath and moans for hours
My life is saved e’re off I pop
You darling, fluffy cobweb mop…

 

[Milking Keynes]

Ode To A Cobweb Mop…

Oh precious mop and cobweb fighter
The nemesis of crawly blighter
I give to you a firm saluting
As hammock webs will be commuting
Unto thy lofty dusting powers
Thus saving wrath and moans for hours
My life is saved e’re off I pop
You darling, fluffy cobweb mop…

We left for days so there’s probably gazillions - do you think he will operate the cobweb blighter or just point them out to me?

Anyway, my name is Havisham - I’m supposed to be cobwebby..

 

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Nooooo! He is NOT allowed to leave them to you Dearest. That’s why he was sent the cobweb mops - so that he could deal with them himself! On no account are you to go within 3 metres of those cobweb mops! They are his. Let him own them dearest! Let him own them…

 

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So dearest! What was the cobweb situation like upon your return?
I trust Himself availed himself of the cobweb mops and let you have a rest after handing out 9 irons all day. Flopping exhausting that is ( not that I’ve ever handled an iron in the last 20 years as Emily will attest)…

Have been thinking of you today dear Captain xx or is it this week you have a reprieve? Xx

 

[Milking Keynes]

So dearest! What was the cobweb situation like upon your return?
I trust Himself availed himself of the cobweb mops and let you have a rest after handing out 9 irons all day. Flopping exhausting that is ( not that I’ve ever handled an iron in the last 20 years as Emily will attest)…

Have been thinking of you today dear Captain xx or is it this week you have a reprieve? Xx

He has become very grumpy. He’s complaining about me and Gem. Gem is a bit clingy since we came back so she started barking at 4am - I took her up with me to my daughter’s room - she went to Venice yesterday (nother airport run ) and put her on the bed with me. In other words, her snoring was with me...

Well, Grumpy said he missed a meeting this morning because of us?? I fail to see how when I was the one that got up? Men.

Anyway, I found the cutest place ever en route to Cork. It’s called Quirky Barn and has everything from plants to outdoor furniture... really unique. I picked up a little herb holding set and wrought iron thingy-me to place around it. So cute - there website is under construction atm but I’ll be keeping a close eye.

 

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He has become very grumpy. He’s complaining about me and Gem. Gem is a bit clingy since we came back so she started barking at 4am - I took her up with me to my daughter’s room - she went to Venice yesterday (nother airport run ) and put her on the bed with me. In other words, her snoring was with me...

Well, Grumpy said he missed a meeting this morning because of us?? I fail to see how when I was the one that got up? Men.

Anyway, I found the cutest place ever en route to Cork. It’s called Quirky Barn and has everything from plants to outdoor furniture... really unique. I picked up a little herb holding set and wrought iron thingy-me to place around it. So cute - there website is under construction atm but I’ll be keeping a close eye.

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Just a quick question vis Himself dearest one! Erm…is he perchance…(intrepid whisper) …Victorian?

Poor little Gem - she doesn’t like being separated from her Mama, and who could blame her. How does Gem snoring in a different room equate to missing a meeting? It simply does not compute. At all.

I love your new kitchen herb thingy. I love herb thingies in general and this in particular. I planted up one of my ‘white company’ ceramic bowls ( you know I love a good ceramic bowl, don’t you? ) and have been delighted with the result as you must be with your lovely blue and white herby balcony thingy. It’s soooo pretty. It’s always nice to find such treasures isn’t it? I will go and photograph mine for you in a minute.

The sales are on at Mrs Alice!!! Also the White Company has lovely ceramics on sale. I bought a lovely vase from them and some of their silk sweet peas and silk Spring flowers and made quite a nice arrangement for my dressing table. I also got my ceramic salad bowl from them. I do love the sales…tee hee….( photos to follow)
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[Milking Keynes]

Just a quick question vis Himself dearest one! Erm…is he perchance…(intrepid whisper) …Victorian?

Poor little Gem - she doesn’t like being separated from her Mama, and who could blame her. How does Gem snoring in a different room equate to missing a meeting? It simply does not compute. At all.

I love your new kitchen herb thingy. I love herb thingies in general and this in particular. I planted up one of my ‘white company’ ceramic bowls ( you know I love a good ceramic bowl, don’t you? ) and have been delighted with the result as you must be with your lovely blue and white herby balcony thingy. It’s soooo pretty. It’s always nice to find such treasures isn’t it? I will go and photograph mine for you in a minute.

The sales are on at Mrs Alice!!! Also the White Company has lovely ceramics on sale. I bought a lovely vase from them and some of their silk sweet peas and silk Spring flowers and made quite a nice arrangement for my dressing table. I also got my ceramic salad bowl from them. I do love the sales…tee hee….( photos to follow)
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Oh, your white ceramic vase is beautiful and the gorgeous white flowers.... dreamy! It suits the lovely sash windows - you have superb taste.

I’m going to take a pic of my daughter’s map she sketched - it won an award by the Architects Association of Ireland and I’ve just today got it back from the framers and hung it up!

Yes, himself has become very (sshhhhh!) victorian....

Be right back with my pic..... plus, can you or Capitán let me know what type of tree this is in our front bed? We need to pull it out and replace it as it is diseased but damned if I know what it is....

I’ll take the pics and be right back
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