I don’t think you’re a fool, no. My sister finishes work at 6, so when it comes to family birthdays, and going out for dinner it always has to be when she finishes, so we don’t end up eating until 7/7.30. We also like to delay the kids dinner (they eat at 5!) because feeding them at the meal is easier as it keeps them distracted for 5 minutes instead of being boredOn another subject, can I get people's opinions on whether I am being a fool or not.
My sister in law turns 18 in June (there's a big gap between her and my other half). Big birthday, I get it. They've decided to hire their favourite curry house as a venue for a party, on the actual night of her birthday, which is a Thursday. Not ideal for people who have work the next day, ie my partner, who as a teacher can't just book the day off, but never mind.
They are keen for us to take 3yo miniP but I have flat out said no as it doesn't start til 7pm (her usual bedtime) and although I could be open to keeping her up a little later, I think it would be tit to take a tired threenager to a loud, noisy birthday party and I would be having a tit time trying to entertain her. Or she would just fall asleep - also rubbish.
So they then said, well can your mum have her. Bearing in mind my mum lives an hour away and also works on Fridays, I can't see how that would work. She leaves at 7am for work and doesn't drive, so I'd have to pick 3yo up at like 6am on Friday morning to bring her back home with me.
Now they are suggesting they get one of my mother in laws cousin's children, who miniP has never in her life met and I have only met once, to stay at our house to look after her. So we would still put her down to bed, then leave for the party and they would just sit in the house and make sure she's ok and doesn't wake. Am I being a fool to hate this idea?
I know it's a big birthday and she wants us there but I would much rather we just all went for lunch in the daytime or something and we treated her separately. But, if we don't go, we'll never hear the end of it, and it will be used as a stick to beat us with forever more
I am also very fussy with who has my kids (thanks covid!!!) and wouldn’t feel great about a babysitter/family relative staying over, even though I previously worked on a nursery AND babysat for a different child every weekend
Could you ask them if they could bring forward half hour?
Even though I moan and fuss about bedtimes, if we do go out on a school day, they are generally very good at staying awake, and I do try and get them home before 8.30 so they get a decent, albeit, slightly shorter bed time
. She only 18 & will get over it. 21 more bigger.
she’s gone to bed at 7pm cos she’s just exhausted.
I tried again at 6pm for her to eat her tea and she had a few mouthfuls. He knows full well no food past 3pm or else she doesn’t eat her tea. It winds me up so much. 
) but he literally has to do 10:30am Saturday to 4pm Sunday. It’s not much time given she’s asleep from 7:30pm till the following morning. Urgh!!!!!
there’s been more weekends than not she says she doesn’t want to go and starts crying.
when I went to Italy in March he had her for 4 nights and he said it was really hard work.