Toddler advice thread #4

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Mine is 2 years 4 months and isn’t ready yet. I’m trying to be chilled about it as it’s far better to do it successfully when he’s older than get stressed and upset about it, but parenting can be awfully competitive, even if you personally aren’t it’s hard not to get sucked into other kids’ amazing achievements and wondering if you have gone somehow terribly wrong! I’ve been feeling this a lot lately, been concerned about my little boys speech.
 
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Hi everyone! Long time lurker on this thread here but looking for a bit of advice, my nearly three year old has gone on a food strike at tea time. Won’t eat a meal but will spend the whole time asking for a snack. He hasn’t eaten tea for the last week or so and it’s getting a bloody nightmare. To make things worse, at nursery yesterday they said he asked for something early because he was hungry and now I’m stressed they think I don’t feed him, I give him the food and let him decide what to do. I try and not offer alternatives as 1) I don’t want to make another separate meal and 2) I don’t want to potentially waste another meal. Last night I did give him a bowl of rice crispies and a banana and he ate most of that but I don’t want to start doing that every night. Any advice would be much appreciated! ❤
 
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Mine is 2 years 4 months and isn’t ready yet. I’m trying to be chilled about it as it’s far better to do it successfully when he’s older than get stressed and upset about it, but parenting can be awfully competitive, even if you personally aren’t it’s hard not to get sucked into other kids’ amazing achievements and wondering if you have gone somehow terribly wrong! I’ve been feeling this a lot lately, been concerned about my little boys speech.
I just always think that hy the time they're adults, even as older kids. When they first walked, talked, potty trained ect won't matter. Even with my kids, even my 5 year old in reception, looking at them all, I can't tell who waked when, who started talking earlier ect 🤷🏻‍♀️

With their speech, it's easy to worry. But if you have a Google, kids are actually saying more than you think.
It doesn't need to be full words, it can even be signs that count as speech. Animal sounds.
Noises like "weee" "Uh oh" are all classed as speech.
 
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Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
 
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Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
It's very hard not to compare 😊
All 3 of my kids have been totally different!
My youngest is 2 on Saturday and she's picked up quite a bit but is still below "average" for a 2 year old. But I'm not worried as she'll pick it up in her own time. She was only saying 3 words by 18 months.
My other 2 were potty trained by 2 and a half. But I can't see her being ready yet.
Same as they were in beds just after they turned 2. But again, she won't be ready.
Yet she was walking at 10 months, middle child was 1 year and oldest wasn't until 18 months.
So they are all so so different.
They've all been raised the same. 😊
 
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Hi everyone! Long time lurker on this thread here but looking for a bit of advice, my nearly three year old has gone on a food strike at tea time. Won’t eat a meal but will spend the whole time asking for a snack. He hasn’t eaten tea for the last week or so and it’s getting a bloody nightmare. To make things worse, at nursery yesterday they said he asked for something early because he was hungry and now I’m stressed they think I don’t feed him, I give him the food and let him decide what to do. I try and not offer alternatives as 1) I don’t want to make another separate meal and 2) I don’t want to potentially waste another meal. Last night I did give him a bowl of rice crispies and a banana and he ate most of that but I don’t want to start doing that every night. Any advice would be much appreciated! ❤
Nursery workers will know he is not the first 3yo to not eat. You won’t be the only parent saying this. Most of the late 2/3 yo on this thread go on food strike
Mine went through this a few months ago. He’s finally started eating better. He would eat nothing I put in front of him for dinners and his response would be ‘I don’t like dinner’ even before I knew what I was cooking. Sometimes he went to bed not eating other times I would offer him weetabix
He’s asking for dinners now, especially cheesy ham pasta, but this works as all the kids eat it
I know it’s frustrating, but it honestly is just a phase
 
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Nursery workers will know he is not the first 3yo to not eat. You won’t be the only parent saying this. Most of the late 2/3 yo on this thread go on food strike
Mine went through this a few months ago. He’s finally started eating better. He would eat nothing I put in front of him for dinners and his response would be ‘I don’t like dinner’ even before I knew what I was cooking. Sometimes he went to bed not eating other times I would offer him weetabix
He’s asking for dinners now, especially cheesy ham pasta, but this works as all the kids eat it
I know it’s frustrating, but it honestly is just a phase
I honestly just worry that they think I don’t feed him at home, I know he’s not the only one but I still don’t want them thinking that 🤣 I’m glad to hear your little one is asking for tea now, hoping to god mine is the same soon! I’m going to try limiting snacks and see if that helps any. The sooner this phase ends the better 😅
 
I think for those worrying about potty training, it’s one of those huge milestones and it will happen when your child is ready. They need to have the bladder control and to realise the feeling of when they need a wee and a poo compared to just doing it without thinking “oh I need a wee / poo, I need to find the potty/toilet”. I wasn’t really bothered to rush it and when it didn’t work I thought never mind, try again in a few months and it was so much easier, I didn’t have to even think about it cos my daughter initiated it. It’s hard to not compare though but like others have said nobody remembers what age kids did the milestones at
 
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Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
easier said than done but please try not to stress about your little ones speech! It sounds like they are doing fantastically. My little one is 2 years and 9 months and has speech delay. She has been receiving private speech therapy for almost 6 months now and only has around 10 words. I am super proud of how well she is doing but I would be absolutely overjoyed if she had quarter of the expressive language your little one does!

This is absolutely not to take away from your concerns, more to hopefully reassure you. Your thoughts and feelings are perfectly valid and you are doing a great job! It’s so easy to get caught up in comparing, but it sounds very much so like your little one is well within the realms of normal. There’s no harm in contacting your health visitor for a chat though who will be able to advise :)
 
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I honestly just worry that they think I don’t feed him at home, I know he’s not the only one but I still don’t want them thinking that 🤣 I’m glad to hear your little one is asking for tea now, hoping to god mine is the same soon! I’m going to try limiting snacks and see if that helps any. The sooner this phase ends the better 😅
No, they’ll definitely know it’s not just yours! We went through it for about 3 months. We don’t really like taking him out to eat anymore because we may as well through money down the drain 🫠
 
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Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
Just want to give you reassurance. This time last year my son barely uttered a word. Now he’s nearly 4 he’s come on so much with his speech. Especially since September we’ve noticed a difference.
He is only saying maximum of three words together but considering he didn’t say anything it’s a big achievement for him and he chatters none stop now in his own way.
What I’m trying to say is don’t feel pressured or like you’ve let him down.
kids do things at their own pace and by the sounds of it yours will pick up more words he’s still only young! There is a lot of pressure for them to be at certain stages by a certain age but try not to worry about what your friends kids are doing.Yours will be able to do things there’s can’t you may not have noticed! ❤
 
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Hi everyone! Long time lurker on this thread here but looking for a bit of advice, my nearly three year old has gone on a food strike at tea time. Won’t eat a meal but will spend the whole time asking for a snack. He hasn’t eaten tea for the last week or so and it’s getting a bloody nightmare. To make things worse, at nursery yesterday they said he asked for something early because he was hungry and now I’m stressed they think I don’t feed him, I give him the food and let him decide what to do. I try and not offer alternatives as 1) I don’t want to make another separate meal and 2) I don’t want to potentially waste another meal. Last night I did give him a bowl of rice crispies and a banana and he ate most of that but I don’t want to start doing that every night. Any advice would be much appreciated! ❤
What sort of things are you serving for snacks? Try and make sure they are not exciting at all ie crisps, sweets, biscuits, etc that may be seen as more attractive items. Serve a good range of food at snacks to cover nutritional needs (eg dairy, protein, fruit/veg, carbs etc, I try and do three groups per snack) and serve similar things that you may at dinner eg salad veg. That way you know all the food going in is covering all the nutritional areas, and makes dinner less “important” nutritionally. make snacks mini meals.
Then with dinner I would serve it as normal and if it’s chosen to be left, so be it. It is so stressful when they don’t eat, and the temptation to feed them anything is strong, but offering a safe food at each meal (eg pasta, bread and butter) also means you know they will have a full tummy and means you don’t need to resort to giving something else afterwards if that’s not how you usually do things.
 
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I tried with my daughter august last year when she was 2.5 years old, she wasn’t ready at all. Loads of accidents and weeing more than she usually would. Tried again end of October/November and it was so easy. The difference of a few months!
Thanks that’s good to know, will leave it a bit and try again x
 
Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
It’s hard not to compare but honestly kids all achieve things in their own time. I have a 10 month old who is just crawling my son who’s 3 was walking at her age but she will get there eventually. It’s so hard when you are around other parents who boast, I know it’s hard but try not to compare I’m sure your little one is doing amazing and the fact you are stressing shows what a good parent you are x
 
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We are starting potty training next week - eek 😬
I think we're about ready to try too, need to re read oh crap and hope for the best haha wanted to wait a bit longer as no. 4 is only 3 months but my boddler seems very ready and I don't want to miss this window where she seems willing.
 
Thanks, WhatABore. I think we’re probably about average, maybe on the lower end. About 120 - 150 words, mostly two word sentences. Daddy work (only daddy works, apparently!) mummy’s here, noisy daddy, bye bye nanny, hello duck, biscuit please, naughty cat. Couple of three word sentences - can say what is it, although sounds more like What tit 😂 and what you doing. And all day long when singing wheels on the bus.

Friends kids are practically reciting Shakespeare, potty trained, counting to twenty, able to identify colours and so on … I’m annoyed with myself as I always vowed I wouldn’t get dragged into any nonsense but then I find myself stressing out!
My 4 year old seemed ‘behind’ with her speech for so long. My HV referred us to a scheme which they visit you for 6 weeks at home and give you ideas for play etc to help encourage speech but we were refused on the basis that she said ‘too many words’ 🫠 we had a few singular words, lots of babble and not much else when she was around 2 1/2. I spent night after night winding myself up, feeling as though we’d failed her, wondering how I could help her and I really didn’t need to. She woke up one day pretty much chatting away and now I don’t get a minutes peace.

Your little one sounds like they are doing absolutely fine, taking it at their own pace and just absorbing everything they hear around them. X
 
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my daughter is 1.5 years old and still can't fall asleep on her own, will someone please say i'm not alone in this 😂
 
Mine has just turned 3 and I still sit next to him playing on my phone until he falls asleep. Or his Dad lies there and falls asleep with him and I have to go in and wake him up 😆
 
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