TheLongMum #3 Life couldn't be harder, I ponder from Lake Garda...

Libertine said:

Huh?

If he was an amazing father and Anna was as abusive as thread would lead you to believe, he would be at a solicitor’s first thing Monday morning to start litigation. He’d tell the court that Anna was absolutely not fit to care for her children while he was happy to reorganise his life to care for his children full time.

That obviously has never happened and won’t ever happen. All a single father needs to do to be labelled ‘a great dad, much better than the mother’ is have some contact with their kids.

It won’t be held against single fathers if they go away for a buck’s or lads’ weekend and ask the mother to care for their children extra nights. No one will question if the children’s holiday sweetie money was spent on lager.

Single fathers don’t need to ever book and pay for a haircut, communicate with nursery/school, have a pair of shoes fitted and pay for them, purchase and label school uniform, make a doctor/dentist/optometrist/etc appointment, organise and pay for a birthday party, bake and send birthday cupcakes to nursery/school, or attend a school sports day or concert.

If they do any of these things, they will be lauded as An Outstanding Father. The bar is indeed lower than the belly of a pregnant ant.

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Hard agree

Libertine said:

Huh?

If he was an amazing father and Anna was as abusive as thread would lead you to believe, he would be at a solicitor’s first thing Monday morning to start litigation. He’d tell the court that Anna was absolutely not fit to care for her children while he was happy to reorganise his life to care for his children full time.

That obviously has never happened and won’t ever happen. All a single father needs to do to be labelled ‘a great dad, much better than the mother’ is have some contact with their kids.

It won’t be held against single fathers if they go away for a buck’s or lads’ weekend and ask the mother to care for their children extra nights. No one will question if the children’s holiday sweetie money was spent on lager.

Single fathers don’t need to ever book and pay for a haircut, communicate with nursery/school, have a pair of shoes fitted and pay for them, purchase and label school uniform, make a doctor/dentist/optometrist/etc appointment, organise and pay for a birthday party, bake and send birthday cupcakes to nursery/school, or attend a school sports day or concert.

If they do any of these things, they will be lauded as An Outstanding Father. The bar is indeed lower than the belly of a pregnant ant.

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Hard agree

Feel like the thread has been majorly derailed by people who know more than we do and made if about her Vs ex.

Libertine said:

Tattle is to ‘gossip’ about public figures, and gossip isn’t necessarily negative.

This thread often veers into fantasy and really doesn’t need to as Anna is fairly honest about her own shortcomings.

The biggest fanfic of all are the ‘Anna’s daughters would be better off with their father’ comments. How the fuck would any of us know that?

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There’s a specific section for rave threads. Feel free to go start one.

NoseyParker2202 said:

Feel like the thread has been majorly derailed by people who know more than we do and made if about her Vs ex.

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Absolutely.

I am personally happy to criticise influencers not disclosing advertising correctly (Anna is always very compliant), exploiting their children online (Anna’s daughters don’t need to feature on her public IG account - I shouldn’t be able to recognise them), and general fuckwittery (MLM word salads, gurning in cars, ugly decorating, advertising inappropriate products - Anna’s dildo collection falls into this category). And of course everyone has their personal line in the sand as to what gossip is.

But this thread seems to have a mean, personal kick ‘em while they are down edge to it.

Bunbun1 said:

There’s a specific section for rave threads. Feel free to go start one.

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Where have I raved about Anna that I’d need to start a rave thread?

Bunbun1 said:

I'd accuse you of being one of Anna's mates but it doesn't appear she has any

Statements like this....



Are quite extreme, and what Anna wants us to think. But we know nothing about this guy! He has his kids 6 nights out of 14, his ex with a spending problem isn't happy with their financial situation. The only time that Anna talks about him is to complain (she's suggested before that hes asked her not to talk about him).

I just don't think its fair to judge his parenting based on Anna moaning. He doesn't have a public instagram account, he's not put himself out there. For all we know when he has the kids hes miserable, stressed and complains. But until he creates a public instagram account and starts moaning on it I don't think its fair to judge him as useless.

We have no way of knowing which is the better parents and to be honest its not a competition? Anna has chosen to create a public instagram account and share information about herself, and this is a forum for discussing that, so we discuss that. But he's a private person, that has chosen not to put their life on instagram, so its not really fair to judge them so harshly.

Why doesn't he go for full custody? Fuck knows. Unless anyone can find a public account where he answers that question we're not going to find out are we!

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So we can't judge him harshly but we can say he's a great dad? If Anna is as bad as is made out on here and he doesn't protect his children from her then he's useless. I don't know Anna and nothing I have ever said about her suggests I do, my opinion is that she's struggling and gets a hard time here for that

Kick em when they’re down?! The woman has just been on holiday to Lake Garda …. A little perspective here please

Anonymous_Troll said:

Kick em when they’re down?! The woman has just been on holiday to Lake Garda …. A little perspective here please

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A woman went on a holiday which was partially funded by donations as she isn’t rolling in cash. She went alone as she doesn’t appear to have a boyfriend or many friends - same reason she took photos with her phone propped up everywhere. Some of her meals were just cheese and biscuits probably because she couldn’t afford to eat out three times a day.

Is that the joyful, fun summer holiday you’d want to take? Because I thought it was kind of sad and depressing (but admittedly better than no holiday). I could rustle up a friend for a holiday abroad and I wouldn’t be setting foot in a supermarket. That’s my perspective.

Libertine said:

A woman went on a holiday which was partially funded by donations as she isn’t rolling in cash. She went alone as she doesn’t appear to have a boyfriend or many friends - same reason she took photos with her phone propped up everywhere. Some of her meals were just cheese and biscuits probably because she couldn’t afford to eat out three times a day.

Is that the joyful, fun summer holiday you’d want to take? Because I thought it was kind of sad and depressing (but admittedly better than no holiday). I could rustle up a friend for a holiday abroad and I wouldn’t be setting foot in a supermarket. That’s my perspective.

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Ok I was pretty set on Lizzie Mintdrop being Anna but having read this post trying to make out how hard done by Anna is for going on holiday I’m thinking that actually both accounts are Anna talking to herself and liking her own posts.

Could anyone else hear sad violin music while reading that? Jesus Christ

Jesus

She seems so deeply unhappy and self-sabotaging. In theory, she could be a successful influencer - she's tall, skinny, attractive with an interest in fashion and design and no qualms about putting her life and her kids on show - she should have plenty of advertisers willing to work with her but when she does sponsored posts they're always awkward like she's ashamed of herself for doing it. I don't know if she still sees a counsellor but she really needs long-term therapy to address why she's always pinning her happiness on men and material possessions.

I think she has great personal style and looks great in what she wears. She could have a career in personal styling and/or sourcing and selling vintage but chooses to do nothing and moan as per. It's very clear that there needs to be major changes in her life but she just can't be arsed. She is repeating her mother's mistakes and her kids are going to be as badly fecked up as she is if she doesn't break the cycle. No one here wishes Anna any badness but it's so frustrating to watch sometimes. She is her own worse enemy but it's never her fault it's her against the whole world

Libertine said:

A woman went on a holiday which was partially funded by donations as she isn’t rolling in cash. She went alone as she doesn’t appear to have a boyfriend or many friends - same reason she took photos with her phone propped up everywhere. Some of her meals were just cheese and biscuits probably because she couldn’t afford to eat out three times a day.

Is that the joyful, fun summer holiday you’d want to take? Because I thought it was kind of sad and depressing (but admittedly better than no holiday). I could rustle up a friend for a holiday abroad and I wouldn’t be setting foot in a supermarket. That’s my perspective.

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Oh yeah poor anna boohoo a free holiday paid for by absolute mugs where she didn’t miss her kids (how is that even possible) , had her days and nights free to wander and explore, and still managed to moan most of the trip and now back, life is so shit now … with her kids. Not forgetting all the places she’s also been for free or Paid for by someone else in last few years meanwhile My sister works full time (in school hours, hey Anna it’s possible ) , worked all through pandemic with 2 kids, hasn’t been away since 2019… and I’m supposed to feel sorry for anna and her lake fucking Garda holiday, hard no.
She spent £500? On the holiday let alone the clothes, makeup, hair and nails she had done before. if her mental health is that debilitating then get the hell off social media.. oh she can’t as she gets her followers to pay for all her stuff.

I see that the “useless” father of the kids that does the 1% of parenting has them today, extra to their usual arrangement, for the second time this week. Or perhaps her narcissistic mother who never helps has taken them on a day out?
Either way I’m just relieved that the poor delicate Anna has managed to find some time to have a lie down and some afternoon drinking after 2.5 exhausting days of parenting this week, and the frankly horrific nightmare of being for class ed to take a non 5 star holiday in Italy.

I sympathise with anyone who struggles with their mental health but it's infuriating to watch the way Anna deals with things. Instead of working on herself and trying to break cycles, she chooses to self destruct and she'll take her children down with her if she isn't careful. I don't think it's right she discusses child maintenance on her instagram at all, especially since it's become apparent that it's probably because she isn't entitled to any - do you not see how manipulative and twisted that is? Even the way she worded it.... I don't currently get maintenance but please don't ask any further questions. Why's that? Because then you'll have to admit you're manipulating the truth for sympathy? Her DMs will be all "Oh my god Anna you get no maintenance?! What the fuck! You poor thing!" etc etc. Like someone said above, she isn't stupid and would have claimed CMS if she was entitled to it.

That holiday has done nothing except push her into debt and now she'll spiral down further than ever. Regarding why the girls dad doesn't step in and take the kids away, maybe she presents herself differently around him. I doubt he looks at her instagram. Also, it'd take more than some erratic and bizarre behaviour to make a judge decide to take her children away. She doesn't beat, neglect or starve them.

Libertine said:

A woman went on a holiday which was partially funded by donations as she isn’t rolling in cash. She went alone as she doesn’t appear to have a boyfriend or many friends - same reason she took photos with her phone propped up everywhere. Some of her meals were just cheese and biscuits probably because she couldn’t afford to eat out three times a day.

Is that the joyful, fun summer holiday you’d want to take? Because I thought it was kind of sad and depressing (but admittedly better than no holiday). I could rustle up a friend for a holiday abroad and I wouldn’t be setting foot in a supermarket. That’s my perspective.

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She has got children that she can take on a joyful summer holiday though? Life is what you make it. Just because someone has it 'worse' than you (can't afford to eat out 3 times a day on a city break), doesn't mean that they have it tough a picnic by lake garda is hardly (to quote a previous poster) Angela's ashes

Lol "I wouldn't step foot in a supermarket", dramatic, I think even most people grab a few snacks, milk etc.

I love going in foreign supermarkets!

Venuslurker said:

Lol "I wouldn't step foot in a supermarket", dramatic, I think even most people grab a few snacks, milk etc.

I love going in foreign supermarkets!

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I have never been on holiday and not gleefully ran into a local supermarket. Mexico? Supermarket. San Diego? Supermarket!!! Skiing? Supermarket!!!! Honestly it’s one of the highlights

Also, it'd take more than some erratic and bizarre behaviour to make a judge decide to take her children away. She doesn't beat, neglect or starve them.
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This is exactly my point when people on here make out she's the most terrible mum and the dad's amazing, I'm sure it's neither. I'm sure they are both just doing their best, yes I said he's useless but I don't know that for sure, I just know that from what Anna says about him I wouldn't want children with him. I do think Anna's doing her best and yes, she's a bit useless too, but I think that's down to her mental illness, rather than her just being a twat. I find it infuriating that she can't pull herself together but I have a niece like that, terrible with money, unable to work full time and terrible at sorting things out for herself. My niece also needs to rest each day even though she sleeps about 10 hours each night. My niece also has a diagnosed mental illness, I see huge similarities between them which I think is one of the reasons I sympathise with Anna.

I don't think she's a terrible mum at all, I don't think many of us on this thread do? I just can't fathom how she spends so much time talking about how her mums negativity affects her etc whilst apparently failing to see that she acts the same towards her own children. She has loads of great qualities and I think she could have a really good career of sourcing vintage outfits from charity shops and upselling them for a profit. She just spends too much time moping over what she thinks she 'should' have - a bloke.

I don’t necessarily think she is a terrible mother, but I do absolutely believe a lot of her choices and behaviours are terrible. For example spending this money on a solo trip to Italy when she could have used it to pay some debt or do fun things with the girls over the school holidays. Or how she doesn’t get a stable job, even during school hours. She comes across as lazy and entitled.

I don’t think anyone has said she’s a terrible mum and for sure no one has said he’s an amazing father, how could we, no one knows him ?

From the way she talks about her girls, it sounds like she thinks they are a burden, she doesn’t enjoy them, would rather be away from them, doesn’t miss them when she’s not with them, she moans absolutely constantly about parenting. Moans about how terrible her mum is/was but does exactly the same to her girls. So if her mum has been detrimental to her growing up then it’s likely the way she behaves will negatively impact her girls.
this is what our thoughts are based off and it’s all facts as it’s all been said by Anna herself

I don’t judge a mother for needing a break, for holidaying alone, for shopping and spending on herself or for saying it’s hard work. This does not make her a bad person but to tell thousands of strangers on the internet that you feel so negatively about your children is very cruel tbh especially when it is for content and to earn you money.

the bar isn’t set low for the dad but I think by having them 50/50 he plays his part tbh. I just hope he provides a nurturing and emotionally safe space for them.

As for the child maintenance I think she just brings that up for attention and engagement cos she Knows it will get tons and tons of comments. It’s all a ploy to gain interactions. It’s how the Instagram algorithm all works and she knows that. The more engagement, the more her page grows equals more money- she’s not daft. I also think she plays on a lot of other things for this very reason. It’s why the sex toy in the bed in the hotel story was always going to happen….very predictable.

all this to say that i know Anna struggles with her mental health and I hope she gets well soon.

Thinking with my Anna head on, I'm wondering if the sex toy in the bed was a clumsy attempt at getting a gig with Lovehoney or something. It'd be her dream job, being sent boxes of vibratey things and lying in bed all weekend.

It was so hot yesterday and she was in bed all day with the curtains drawn. She likes the sun else she wouldn't have just been to Italy. She gets all this free time and just wastes it, I'd have been down the park with a book and a 4-pack of beers if I had the opportunity. I'd kill for a childfree hour let alone a weekend.