The Things Influencers Say That Make You Squirm

[fireflies]

Have we covered middle class mummy influencers lingo yet

4th trimester
Bringing up the drawbridge
I'm a goddess because I pushed a baby out.
# so darling
# Candid childhood.
#making memories
It's ok not to me ok
Mental mutha
Are you ok hun?

The passive aggressive ‘I have to tell you it’s gifted because of the bloody rules ’

It's so annoying to declare
Annoying to who?

 

[Keepitw0nky]

Have we covered middle class mummy influencers lingo yet

4th trimester
Bringing up the drawbridge
I'm a goddess because I pushed a baby out.
# so darling
# Candid childhood.
#making memories
It's ok not to me ok
Mental mutha
Are you ok hun?




It's so annoying to declare
Annoying to who?

YES the insta mummy’s lingo is right up there

 

[insta(sham)]

DM for collaborations.

Loosely translates to, I’m a nobody who is desperate for money and fame. Send me free tit

 

[motherofdonkeys]

'the decorator has been painting today'

Seriously, most of them don't work other than instagram, pick up a paint roller and do it yourself you lazy sod.

 

[OhAbsolutely]

‘Catch up with you beauts in a bit’ duck off bleep.

 

[Alightened]

I think so bloody highly of myself that I just know that there's some bloody idiots out there that will worship me and hang on to my every word. I love myself, and you should love me too

 

[Elgato]

It’s not so much what they say it’s when they’re #gifted crap and they film themselves opening the endless boxes and the crackle of the plastic does my head in

 

[Casperron]

Rosie B can’t be arsed to wash her own hair

 

[Lalaloopsy]

It’s maybe already
been said but I hate when British mummies or anyone else Americanises everything:-

Mom
Mommy
Diaper
Closet
Zucchini
Vacation

And when did high street make up become “drug store”

 

[pinkypurr]

ob-sessed
AHHHHHH MASSING
YAAAASSS
YASSS QUEEEEN
love you guys (no you f* dont)
A particularly smug and irritating "fitness" you tuber says ma familia.

Rosie B can’t be arsed to wash her own hair

I had to delete the photo because its so annoying. what a lazy and entitled cow

 

[Birdyohseven]

Most things Mrs Hinch says and repeats a million times!!!! Dorgeous, handsomes, all the best....

 

[Ineedahero]

Living my truth (wtf does that mean)

Speaking my truth (it's not the truth it's your bleeping OPINION)

My human (when referring to partner or spouse)

Yasss Queen

When followers claim influencers are "raw and authentic". As if a highly cultivated grid of photos is authentic.

When they write poetry. For the love of God please stop

 

[Jasmine]

Hi all, I'm new here. I have never laughed so hard at some of the comments on here, pure gold!!
I love it.

 

[emmer_moans]

Living my truth (wtf does that mean)

Speaking my truth (it's not the truth it's your bleeping OPINION)

This indeed!

 

[DirtyLaundry]

#Bossgirl
#Bossmum

 

[Maria1]

'Challenged'.
'i have always loved organic tofu so when Tofu r Us challenged me to create a dish for an impromptu dinner party and then put a bucket on my head for a big cheque I leapt at the chance'.

 

[HotCrossBun]

What word/statement from influencers can you not stand?

Mines has to be I’m obsessed!!

Aaaaargh! Boils my piss no end!!

 

I cannot stand people who refer to themselves as mumma’s or their kids as their besties.

Sure I’ll think of more

 

[Gifted12345]

“hubby” makes my skin crawl

 

[letsmeltthatlard]

If I follow anyone and they have the words "living my best life" anywhere on their profile, they are swiftly unfollowed.


bastards.