The Ingham Family #283 Sarah’s popping out another sprog, a new employee for the vlog

[Maisie842]

this made me feel a bit vommity!

 

[Cheezychips]

FINDING OUT I WAS PREGNANT STRANDED IN A SNOW STORM! (PREGNANCY TEST ON CAMERA)

Lazy screeches good evening. She wanted to do an intro and show her moon face on camera. They’ve cleaned up after dinner and Lazy is off to bed with Ben - Ben and Jerry’s. This vlog is her and Creepstopher finding out she was knocked up in a blizzard. She has a washing machine in her stomach.

Norway, on a forest road. 9th February 2023. 7:20pm.
Creepstopher says this may be the most important video he makes all year. Lazy was due to start her period today but she hasn’t. They’ve got a regular pregnancy test. Screeching foghorn yells in the background and makes her way over to the camera. She’s never got to a missed period before testing as she’s always tested before she was due. She has been on the pill since she was 17 but hasn’t been on it since 2017. They’re filming in the toilet in their log cabin.

It’s been three minutes. Lazy doesn’t want to look and starts squealing. Creepstopher has the test in his hand. He gasps. Lazy gasps. He grabs her and starts eating her face. He knew she was knocked up. Dr Delonge's heart is going 200 beats a minute. The test line is really dark. Creepstopher grabs Lazy from behind and says he loves her so much. Only when she’s pregnant and vulnerable you filthy cunt. She reminds him he promised it’s the last child. Creepstopher says a clearly audible “shit” at 5:57. They’re in a public women’s toilet. Lazy keeps showing us the test.

Lazy usually has an inkling if she's pregnant as she takes 100 tests a week. She is still going sledging and skiing on the trip. She will be careful but saw a pregnant woman skiing the other day so it's fine.

Back to screechy Lazy in the Rosabelle Manor kitchen. She hopes we enjoyed the footage. Neither her nor Creepstopher expected a positive. She can’t watch the footage back. It feels like a lifetime ago but was a lovely moment. They were in a truckers toilet at a truck stop. The hardest part was going back to the van and not saying anything. They get no privacy from the girls. Mila drops something on her toe and starts crying. Ever the doting mother, Lazy says that’s the fakest cry she’s ever heard and rolls her eyes. Lazy remembers the desperation to want to talk to Creepstopher about the pregnancy but they couldn’t for a week. Isla says she and the girls got suspicious. Creepstopher was so obvious because he told the girls to be careful of Lazy. Lazy dragged Isla onto her and told her she didn't need to be careful so she wasn't suspicious anymore. She told Creepstopher she was going to ski and the girls that she wouldn’t be sledging if she was pregnant.

Lazy and Creepstopher went into the supermarket alone together to talk about the pregnancy or told the girls to go to the toilet block. It didn't matter about Jace and Mila because they don't understand. The sickness started at exactly six weeks. Tomorrow’s vlog will be telling the girls and Jace.

End of vlog
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What form of contraceptives were they using if she wasn't on the pill since 2017? Surely if theyd been 'doing the deed' she would have been pregnant pretty much ever since then. This just proves that 1. They don't do 'it', unless they're trying to conceive, or 2. he uses a really stupid form of contraception by not thingiebobing in the you know what. Apparently he hates condoms so I'm going for number 1


Edited to say - I can't believe I'm actually pondering this, let alone posting my musings for others to read. I am so sorry for putting these horrific images into anyone's minds.

 

[HelloCreepy]

Im surprised Sarah’s pregnancy hasn’t triggered me massively. I’m having a hard time being confronted with pregnant women as I’ve been going through a bit of a struggle lately. I’ve had a tumor the size of a tennis ball removed from my uterus last September. Needless to say that thing prevented me from getting pregnant and there was no way of knowing beforehand whether I would be able to conceive after the surgery. I wasn’t allowed to try for a baby until my last checkup with my surgeon, which was a couple weeks ago and he said it couldn’t look any better and he had no doubt that a pregnancy will happen if we started trying now.
i am so happy and so excited to bring a life into this world, raise and love this child the best way I can. Protect them but let them make their own decisions and mistakes and most of all teach them to be independent, let them have an education and a social life and most importantly give them a stable, loving home. None of which Sarah and Chris would ever even consider.

I can’t wait y’all

 

[Old Banger Bett]

Isla is devastated .

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

Fucking hell! Another pregnancy related vlog, it is going to be a very long 6 months
What next? "Witness our conception. See Dad spaff into a cup and get the turkey baster out on Mum *Emotional*

 

[Cockleshell Bay]

I am calling it now, the baby will come out holding a slow cooker and a packet of cathedral city.

 

[Cockleshell Bay]

Watching last night’s Vlog when he said Sarah was an amazing woman because she was pregnant. Slightly insensitive, being pregnant does not define your capabilities as a woman and that is coming from someone who has managed to conceive naturally. He talks crap constantly.

 

[555666]

Nothing says keeping your private life private quite like vlogging 'boyfriend dyes my hair' after a week of your parents dropping comments about you having a boyfriend in vlogs and on social media. They just can't resist exploiting the most interesting, relevant (to the IFAM) news that they've had in years.

 

[Maisie842]

Own up, who wrote this on Sarah’s insta

 

[Neck lace]

Thank you @Neck lace
This is the one I was looking for. When they filmed the test he hugged her and told her she was the most incredible woman and that he loved her so much. It immediately reminded me of this photo where he says he wish he could keep her like that forever. It is such a bloody odd thing to say. This man isn't wired right.
---

She was really emotional and the way she cried later was concerning. I thought either she's starting to get hormonal or she genuinely is struggling emotionally. Poor Isla. She is terribly isolated and the longer they keep her from peers the harder it will get.
---

Yup. In the span of less than a week we learned every detail of their contraception methods, when big Lazy ovulates, that fuckface is that controlling that he 'knows' she's pregnant the FIRST DAY of a missed period etc.
Additionally, they have upped the exploitation of their child by drawing little diagrams to the poor baby's developing penis/vagina. Yes I know it's somewhat cute deciphering ultrasound pics, but do strangers need to see it?

PS: I swear Creepy is the type to puncture a condom to ensure she gets pregnant.

He's definitely not wired right. Isla was devastated, Esme was livid, Isabelle was disappointed and yet he still called it the best reveal reaction that they'd ever filmed!

He really doesn't care about any of them. At least three women have now said that he didn't use condoms when he slept with them. It would obviously be devastating for Sarah and the kids if he got another woman pregnant. But his selfish desire to have unprotected sex overrides all of that. He lives in the moment, is highly selfish and loves taking risks. Sarah would still stay with him if he got another woman pregnant and he knows that. At this point he could move another woman into the rooms above the garage and Sarah still wouldn't leave him. Such a messed up family.

 

[Tublet83]

Do we think we will get another baby shower this pregnancy?
The cake was epic

 

[Puppet]

I think Isla was acting..and unfortunately she is a rubbish actress...
For all.we know that wasn't the 1st take either

I genuinely don't think she was acting. At the start she looked around to see what reaction was expected because she's used to mirroring her siblings, but as the video went on and she realised what was happening it seemed to hit home and the tears and shaking were a very real reponse.

 

[hayley]

Here we go!

His wording is disgusting. What he's proud of her now she finally gave into his demands? And how he loves her body changing? More like he loves how she's getting bigger and can no longer get in his way of being a dirty deviant

 

[Big frank]

Dear Lazy,

Please look up the diagnostic criteria for hyperemisis. You did not, and have never, had it. Puking a few times a day isn't hyperemisis. If you truly had it you wouldn't have been able to move your eyes let alone crave a fucking prawn salad. If you had hyperemisis you would have it throughout your pregnancy not til the 12 week mark like regular morning sickness. If you had hyperemisis you'd have LOST WEIGHT ( and the diagnostic critera state at least 5% of your overall body weight) not gained it. If you had hyperemisis you would need hospital admissions to rehydrate you and certainly wouldn't have been farting around in the snow for 2 months.

Stop claiming ownership an experience you haven't had. As a hyperemisis surviver I can categorically say you do not have it... its infuriating hearing cunts like you claiming regular morning sickness is hyperemisis. Its a condition that can be fatal you fucking idiot. Just fucking stop! It's like the toe cancer all over again. If you did ever have hyperemisis you sure as hell wouldn't have risked having 7 fucking (one of them is quite possibly as fake as your toe cancer) pregnancies for fear of how seriously ill pregnancy makes you. Just stfu you ignorant twat!


Sorry tattler, rant over.

 

[Big frank]

My heart breaks for Isla. She's gone from being the baby they all adored to a neglected nervous wreak. The way she sees it is three times she's been replace and with each baby she's more and more forgotten. She needs a therapist to work through the abandonment issues she's clearly expressing. Lazy, those were not tears of happiness. Stop popping out kid after kid and concentrate on the ones you have. Nurture them with genuine positivity not the toxic kind. Isla is crying out for help and all you have done but getting pregnant is reenforce her worse fears. You are a shitshow of a mother, you really are!

 

[hmmm_no]

Y'all. Oh my goodness.

I worked overtime yesterday and was a bit slap happy by the time I was heading home. So I'm walking down like seven flights of stairs because the elevators don't work on my floor after 6pm unless you have a key, and it was about midnight. And I'm 99% sure I'm alone, because even hospitals get quiet and also most people use the damn elevator. And I had this shower of cnts stuck in my head, and I had that stupid rant of Sarah's going over and over in my brain because of course. So I start freaking SAYING "If I want a burgaaaah for mah teeeaaa, I'll 'ave a burgah for mah teaaa!" in the thickest Yorkshire accent I can, because that's what lunatics like me do, ya know?

Guys, I was not alone in the stairwell. And now I need to change my name and disappear. Any suggestions? Because I can clearly never show my face here again.

 

[Malcolm Conkers]

The Ingham Family posted:
Don’t teach your baby to say “No” #cute #baby #shorts
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Any child who is around your husband, “No” should be the first word you teach them #kiddy #fiddler

 

[Maisie842]

Translantion:

I’m really pissed off that the vlogs I thought would get hundreds of thousands of views for our new cash grab, would make someone with only 200k subscribers blush. Not to mention the fact that a fan is getting more views than our own daughter is, don’t you know who we are? Because of this, you don’t deserve another video, you ungrateful peasants! Also, not one of you has offered to buy my super dooper van which even has a star gazing deck! Aaaand no one has bought my drone yet. WTF GUYZZZZZZ. Give your heads a wobble.

And what I mean by “cringe” is that I’ve fallen on my arse again in tomorrow’s vlog, by doing something dumb as fuck or have faked doing something dumb as fuck as we now need new clickbait. Tune in tomorrow for the next instalment of Groundhog Day

 

[Cockleshell Bay]

I agree throwing the pregnancy test across the table spoke volumes about Chris’s arrogance and disregard for how anyone else might feel. I actually thought Izzy response was quite subdued. I would imagine she feels uncomfortable with it all. I really hope she can steer away, it’s clear she loves her siblings but it’s also clear she cares more for them than Chris and Sarah. The whole video was cringe worthy.

 

[Charmball]

This means we will have the joy of Sarah flashing her bump in a bikini and washing and airing her vag in the pool again this summer