The ick #10

[Rodeodown]

My current friend with benefits is going to Vegas over the festive period with his (all male) friends and he was showing me the group chat which I noted is named "Vegas " and I'm praying it wasn't him who created the group because the thought of a man creating the group, naming it, adding emojis and adding the other blokes has given me the big time ick

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Men eating beans on toast.
Men eating beans on toast in an office.
Men mopping up beans on their plate with a piece of toast.
Men eating beans on toast and there is too much butter on the toast and it's gloopy and mixes in with the beans.
Men heating beans in the microwave and stopping the microwave every 30 seconds to see if the beans are hot enough.
Men having beans that have been in the microwave too long and the edges are crusty.

 

[harveydean]

I was in Sainsbury’s earlier. Caught the eye of a handsome middle aged guy. Coincidently walked behind him down the next aisle. Enjoyed the view of his bum…

All good until he picked up a jar of Horlicks. I dry heaved and carried on walking.

 

[Tide'sout]

Mine has a cough and lifts one leg up in the air when he coughs in bed, help me.

 

[Foxvint]

When a man is complaining about crap customer service to a company and says 'I'm not a happy bunny'. Fuck off u big ming.

 

[Bonbon76]

Babies in formal wear. Specifically mini suits or bow ties. Proper shoes. Dressed as though they have a meeting with the board at 2pm.

Yuck. Nope. No.

 

[EvilJigglypuff]

I know this predominantly about things men do that give us the ick, but I looked at my friend’s Instagram last night and it was literally ALL selfies, hundreds of them all nearly identical I got the friend ick

 

[VirtualSignal]

Fleece jackets with wolves on the back, howling at the moon, from a bank holiday market

 

[Foxvint]

I bet Jay Z gave Beyonce the ick when he said your breastses is my breakfast

 

[EffingDust]

We had a client in our office on Friday - she is co-founder and CEO of a massive company, absolutely loaded, gorgeous hair, always looks stunning, drives a lush car. She is beautiful and I have a bit of a crush on her.
Then when she came to leave, she did that thing 5 year olds do where they pull their sleeve down and grip the wristband so it doesn't slip up the coat sleeves. It proper icked me.

I do this

sorry to be an ick, but for me the ick is the sensation of my sleeves all bunched up inside the coat

 

[dovelist]

Men who very clearly go to the gym and then you look down and see a pair of chicken legs

Lol, I always ask my husband if he’s been skipping leg day. Love him to bits but since starting gym he’s built like a french bulldog standing on its hind legs.

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

This kind of trouser attire. Unfortunately, I swiped to match back with him on bumble. I was just going to let it expire, but he’s extended the match. 🫣 those are not the legs of someone who is 6’1. Not even with the added chunky trainer sole.

 

[Lazarus]

balloon releases for dead people. what's the fucking point?

 

[Lola Ruby]

Just seen something that is such an ick that I feel physically sick. A lad I fancied massively in secondary school, and (before this) still wouldn't say no to, has posted loads of stuff for sale on Facebook Marketplace and some of it is clothes, he's got photos of himself stood there awkwardly modelling them, from different angles, and in white flipflops to top it all off. An ick I never knew I had

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

When people put “the school of life/university of life” or some shite in their dating app bio under their education.

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Men who go bowling and put on bowling shoes (and ick in itself), and realise the shoes are too big and have to go back up to the counter to change the shoes for a smaller size and they are just standing there in their socks.

 

[lilykestrel]

Gave myself the ick earlier

When you put your sports bra on after it's been in the wash, and the padding has gone all skewiff, so then you're rooting around in the little holes at the sides to try and straighten it out and it doesn't work so you have to admit defeat and take it off to sort it

 

[Loppylou89]

The word "pamphlet"

 

[Yer_wha?!]

Sporting icks

Men who call into radio shows to talk about football

Overweight men in football shirts

Men who wear football shirts in airports

Men who leave a beach towel with their football team on it on their sun lounger on holiday

Men wearing their brand new football shirt (usually with 3/4 length cargo shorts) in restaurants on holiday, when their wife is wearing a nice summer dress

 

[Thank(space)you]

Neurospicy as a phrase