The Frugality/Alexandra Stedman #7 Everything is affordable when it's #gifted

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So so sorry to hear all of this. It’s so unfair and tough for most people.
sending love and strength to you
 
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Obviously have no idea about your situation but there are lots of organisations that can provide help and guidance for anyone struggling financially - Stepchange and Christians against poverty (ignore the godsquad name) are always really highly recommended on Reddit. There’s also r/ukpersonalfinance which you can ask for advice on but some of them are spiteful frugal men so take it with a pinch of salt. But you needn’t struggle alone there’s always help out there
 
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She really needs to grow a thicker skin if the comments on here upset her so much. On the whole these threads are pretty mild with a focus on her faux frugality and shit content.
 
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She really needs to grow a thicker skin if the comments on here upset her so much. On the whole these threads are pretty mild with a focus on her faux frugality and shit content.
I know honestly if I’d been gifted such a blessed rich girl life by my parents ppl on the internet couldn’t tell me shit. I’d be sat there in my 30% LTV home chilling tf out eating my way through 12 bagels cut in half browsing the Tiger website not paying it any mind.
 
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It goes to show how little Alex has to actually worry about - your biggest problem is your biggest problem after all.

And ok lots of people hate her glasses and her beige food but really who cares. Bottom line is if she didn’t push an exploitative faux frugality agenda, didn’t lie about her grocery shopping bill, didn’t encourage cancelling the licence fee (while shilling for Sky) and declared ads properly this thread would be dead.

In the nice to have column - a bit of honesty about inherited wealth and how even a small amount of it drastically changes the direction of your life wouldn’t go astray. Not to mention how just having the safety net of comfortable parents helps with mental health even if you never take up the offer of help.

Even the secret second story extension - there’s no problem with not revealing every detail but in that case don’t go on and on about how tight your reno budget is, that you can’t stretch to a side return etc. It feels disingenuous because it is.
 
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Have these women never had a professional appraisal in their lives? Have they genuinely never had criticism before Tattle? I don’t want the inspectorate for my job to come and tell me what I do badly, but they do it because that’s how jobs work???
 
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Amen
all of the above
 
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Yep, and this is part of the many reasons why people don’t like traditional social media anymore because it’s hierarchical and only a few ppl ever have their opinions considered (blue ticks, large followings) - anyone voicing any dissent is instantly dogpiled or classed as a hateful troll, there’s no room for discourse or growth. Not that I’m remotely advocating for anyone taking these sorts of convos onto their pages!

Like here we can discuss the other side of the story which is it moral for influencers to build para social relationships with women (and yes it’s always women, and especially new mums) in order to flog them new gear? Like is it acceptable that this stage of capitalism relies on images of excessive/luxe consumption to drive consumption via fomo or shame? Is this level of consumption acceptable with imminent climate catastrophe? Like us as consumers being victims of capitalism can be true with these guys being chewed up and spat out by it too can be true, like they’re the ones desperate to appease the algo so churning out shit content with 0 thought that misses the mark (license fee, £40 food bill) or is just naff (shuddering on patio, today’s reel) that gets mocked on tattle. They’re the ones who are choosing to monetise their lives and children cos they wouldn’t otherwise be able to earn what they are in a free market. Like that’s tragic too and maybe something that lot need unionising to deal with cos they don’t sound v happy with it either? Maybe this could be another argument for UBI - to free the intergenerational wealth huns from the rat race of generating aff links so they can buy Aesop like their pals from school who managed to get good jobs?
 
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All of this. My frustration with Alex is that she chooses the weirdest hills to die on, and when challenged, doubles down.

It’d be a hell of a lot more interesting and relatable for her to talk about why they chose a second story extension over a side return, or even a “this is how we manage our grocery budget and what is costs” rather than sort of pretending to be frugal by plucking imaginary grocery costs out of the air.

She’s so performatively cheap but if she just embraced her “cost conscious middle class” persona she’d actually have better and more authentic content for the type of people who follow her.
 
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She won’t do that because she has no self awareness. Compared to her peers she IS poor, because even though she came from a well off family and (?) went to private school, she didn’t marry a wealthy man. She thinks that qualifies her to talk about frugality.
 
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If she doesn’t want people criticising her then she really should stop lying on her gram. The £40 weekly shop BS? I hope that’s never forgotten.
 
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If she doesn’t want people criticising her then she really should stop lying on her gram. The £40 weekly shop BS? I hope that’s never forgotten.
How naive do you have to be to not expect people asking you about the receipt in this day an age? A real insult to her audience intelligence
 
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I completely agree. I love cost-conscious middle class shit My husband and I earn quite a lot combined but it doesn't mean I want to just throw cash around without a thought and we still have a budget! I wouldn't hold it against her for getting an extension, you're housing two kids for the best part of twenty years.

The post about the air fryer was truly baffling. Does she like it or not??? And why disclose that you don't clean it??? It's like the company really need to pay her to have an opinion on it. An air fryer could totally be frugal if it's meeting your cooking and nutritional needs, but if you bought yourself a top of the line oven in your new kitchen, then it's probably not.
 
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So not only a silly reel about running to Tiger but she actually took Chris with her to film the magic moment she found more Tiger tat she doesn’t need
 
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Tbh I don’t think there’s any way to pivot to being a good or happy influencer when the whole thing is so inherently clapped. The exception being if you moved over to sustainable / slow living with more of a focus on education which then becomes economically unviable so is it even influencing as we know it? Unless you got a mega eBay partnership like that girl off love island I suppose? And is that even okay? Or went more into journalism and media?

Idk for me I don’t want lifestyle advice from ppl living an elongated childhood provided by their hard working parents. I’m not motivated to buy anything pushed to me by ppl that couldn’t do what we’ve done and I’m grateful for having the conviction of self to not feel
such a level of status anxiety that would be necessary to compel me to buy into whatever hallmarks of a MC lifestyle are being pushed to us by ppl that don’t and could never pay for it themselves. Like I don’t find hoarding 5 ceramic teaspoon holders remotely aspirational and I couldn’t give a fuck about what soap is cool to have in the guest bathroom this season because I’m a financially independent adult with our own financial future to manage. We have nice things we’ve bought because we needed or loved them, but we consume sustainably for this earth and for a family that are building a life for ourselves and intergenerational wealth for our little one. Like surely this style of middle class on a shoestring content is just for other feeble objectively unsuccessful adult children absolutely ignorant to the world? Idk suspect maybe we’d all be happier if we considered why class markers matter to us and what are we really spending for? It might be liberating to escape that never ending consumption cycle that only truly benefits big business.

+ This level of consumption is ghastly and increasingly passé imo, a recession will be awful for many reasons but I hope it encourages excessive consumers to reconsider their relationship with acquiring tat and adopt a more mindful approach.
 
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Well Alex, many women feel down as a result of influencers like you that falsely portray a lifestyle as if it’s total attainable, when it is not.

there have been so many women on here say that alex has made them feel so inadequate with her holidays, renovations and expensive clothes. Making out that if you did some small things you can have it all like her.

she’s such a fraud, it’s so damaging and she should reflect on what she actually stands for as an influencer.
 
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