The Chateau Diaries #63 A holiday from a holiday, a honeymoon, and two dents in a bed

[Tellingthetruth123]

Did anybody watch the royle family back in the day ? Anna’s dad sounds just like him

 

[New Yorker]

"Basketcase or staircase?"

 

[purejuice]

Thank you very much for that background and info.
So well done for getting your husband on the best track. It's difficult to counter the assumptions of any doctor.
You actually explained very very well why I consider 'BPD' to be one of the worst and cruellest psychiatric labels ever.

I studied psychology at uni for 7yrs+. I became truly sickened at the way patients are treated - or, rather, mistreated. 99.9% of everyone labelled 'BPD' have a very sad childhood history of chronic abuse, unstable primary carers who ensure a chaotic lifestyle. These poor children reach adulthood entirely traumatised.

In short, 'BPD' should be scrapped for the slapdash convenience it really is for doctors. They don't understand, can't be bothered or don't want to risk straying outside their billing codes. Pejorative labels and useless meds are easier.

Having read and studied widely, thought long and written much about it and allied conditions, my suggestion is not to label emotional and developmental difficulties by behaviour but to recognise the victimhood, the profound trauma, and support victim-led and orientated healing from that, with lots of compassion and practical help (which is rather as you and your husband have found best).
And call it Childhood Trauma Injuries or something very similar. Anything that doesn't convey that the victim is at fault and which roots the issues firmly in the cause: abuse injuries.
Who says psychs are right? They do. Nothing in the DSM5 is cast in stone.

It's promising that the new crop of psychs coming along now are far more interested in getting to the truth of this so called BPD and also PTSD, anxiety and depression. The new wave are beginning to construct a more accurate perspective of victimisation and societal dysfunction resulting in injuries which then give rise to behaviours that most others don't understand and find challenging.

Forgive me, I could (and have!!) write thousands of words about all this!

Who knows what Miss Wilt's issues really are.? Though we can recognise that some of her behaviour and attitudes are noticeably unhelpful to herself and annoying or troubling to others.

There's a whole bunch of books on the politics of DSM listings, beginning, I think, with this one on how Robert Jay Lifton got PTSD listed based on his very problematic ascription of psychoanalytic neurosis theory onto survivors of Hiroshima (trauma). Famously, he asked every survivor he met if they had survivor guilt, and every one said no, I'm Asian, we don't do guilt, we do shame. Plus it was my karma to survive and theirs to die. His conclusion: denial was symptom # 1. A review of his opus said, it takes a lot of nerve to bomb the Japanese back into the stone age and then to declare them guilty.
Anyway, DSM listings are huge moneymakers and unscrupulous physicians love them.

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

I think I might be a bit too common for him nice tho he is

He humbly admitted he comes from a working-class family in Birmingham who had a taste of extravagant and high living when he dated a rich sugar daddy successful boyfriend whom he's no longer with but still good friends with. I won't mind being friends with him.

He's very down to earth...quite literally

(he always loves to sit on the ground).

 

[BubbleWorld]

Stephanie and Ruth on their way to the ball at Château de Versailles.
View attachment 760239

Were they part of the French cancan troupe?
So they went to Versailles to entertain, not to be entertained.

"Basketcase or staircase?"

?

 

[toilingwiththetoile]

I did wish that she would shut her mouth and let us just enjoy the scenery. I did get tired of her suggestions as to what needed to be updated. I disagreed with most everything.

Equally annoying she films Filly backing her up on suggestions and ideas for HMN. Pan camera on back up squirrel agreeing!

 

[Phoenix Richards-Bingham]

That is a nice building. Lovely gardens.
That was one of the chateaux our agents included on the list we were sent last year, but we did not like that it needed a lot of updates, those 1980s bathrooms are ! I'm sure the new owners will do well. They seem like a nice lot, with just a tinge of insanity, evidenced by being enamored by SJ's charm.

Yes, some of the bathrooms looked dated, but that cobalt blue tiled bathroom and the red tiled bathrooms were beautiful...I guess it's just our differences in age how we view certain things. As a young couple, you may not care for that kind of aesthetic but if I had a bathroom like either of those two, I'd never want to leave it! I'd be taking several baths a day...

 

[Marty McFly 9]

Julia's chateau is gorgeous! The grounds are unbelievable!

SJ wasn't quite so hyper, but repeating what the estate agent had just said over and over was annoying. Flip was very quiet, so that was nice!

 

[Phoenix Richards-Bingham]

"Basketcase or staircase?"

What is this in reference to?

 

[Arfarf]

2 things …
Nicolas Fairford is my new neighbour.
Potty looks like Brandon Flowers dad.

Really????
That is very interesting!
Take him some homemade cookies....or jam .
And keep us in the know.
All that I am curious about is if he really talks that way when he isn't on camera?

 

[toilingwiththetoile]

So Julia's château is stunning, marvelous, amazing and everything La Lande is not.
Wonder if SJ is kicking herself, for not having that château and being stuck with La Décharge.
Also, those bloopers made the ending seem so unprofessional. Bloopers come at the end of the video...

I agree, I may be wrong but I have not seen her do bloopers like that before..interesting it was the plug for the new channel - so she gets to say it over and over...call me cynical but that is one way to hammer a message home. I immediately decided to forget the woman and her channels name.

 

[Bored Mermaid CC]

He humbly admitted he comes from a working-class family in Birmingham who had a taste of extravagant and high living when he dated a rich sugar daddy successful boyfriend whom he's no longer with but still good friends with. I won't mind being friends with him.

He's very down to earth...quite literally
View attachment 760272
(he always loves to sit on the ground).

frankly, I like his style but more importantly he doesn’t shout talk (like Fanny and Pathetic) during his videos so he is already way ahead in my book

 

[Pno]

Seems wearing a necktie puts a stop to the snorting!!!

And my god what an absolutely stunning Château!
Listening to SJ knock the bathrooms is beyond ridiculous.

 

[wibblywobbly]

I keep the volume way down so I don't have to listen to her...and I kept my eyes closed at the beginning so I didn't have to see her....and by the way, does anyone else get creeped out by her mouth (and teeth!!!)????....her mouth absolutely takes up a full 1/3rd of her face! and then take into account her huge eyes!

I'm sorry, I never make fun of people! But I just cannot look at her anymore. .....I think I need an intervention.....maybe hypnosis to suggest that I "see" someone else's face and "hear" someone else's voice when I watch her vlogs.....or maybe just NOT watch her vlogs....but I'm like a moth drawn to a flame when it comes to her vlogs...I just want to see what everyone else is talking about on here....

Just step away from the channel...you can do it! I haven't watched any since before Phyllis arrived and never suffered from withdrawals.

 

[toilingwiththetoile]

I learn so much here. For some reason I thought no one from the UK had emigrated to Oz since Mr. Micawber.
If it's not too personal, could you suggest what impelled your parents to do it?

Ha! It is not personal at all. There was a big push in that era (Australian House based in Manchester) for what is known as 10 pound poms. Paid passage to Australia to fill employment opportunities in various Australian States - I think my parents had a choice of South Aust. or Victoria. I was young and I was happy to go - land of sun and Skippy. I think it was a very brave move to change everything. Many did return to the Uk. For my family, after many ups and downs - it worked.

Seems wearing a necktie puts a stop to the snorting!!!

And my god what an absolutely stunning Château!
Listening to SJ knock the bathrooms is beyond ridiculous.

This must have been filmed before Sillymar showed us all the wibbly fixtures in her very tacky guest bedroom bathroom. That vlog was a revelation.

 

[Jeeves]

Her peers at boarding school saved her life and formed her (unacknowledged) sexuality. There's an interesting developmental psych who says you learn everything from your peers.

Interesting that so much of her life on camera at HMN shows girlie boarding school behaviour. (I may have commented on it here.??)
Hahaha!! I'm trying to think what I learnt from my peers... seriously, I can only come up with how-not-to-do-things and how-not-to-be.

Apparently, Fanny went to a state secondary day school, not a boarding school.

Espe is correct. Fanny did not go to a boarding school, she went to a state funded secondary school, Thomas Mills High School in Framlingham
Facts not supposition, Tattlers!

 

[witchgrass]

This must have been filmed before Sillymar showed us all the wibbly fixtures in her very tacky guest bedroom bathroom. That vlog was a revelation.

She must have said "downstairs loo" at least four times in this video and it's starting to sound like dirty words.

 

[OneMoonbeam]

Wonder if this happened as one of the upstairs bathrooms was refitted or if it's from one of the vintage bathrooms? Or possibly the tiny kitchen.....
And Fanny....just because "the plumbing is there" doesn't mean that it won't still need replacing. She's clueless, no wonder her radiators are dousing the downstairs.

 

[LonePalm]

So many questions! Did you meet him? Does he let you call him Nick? Did you fall asleep mid-conversation?

I like him, he seems nice and hope he's a good neighbor.

Seems wearing a necktie puts a stop to the snorting!!!

And my god what an absolutely stunning Château!
Listening to SJ knock the bathrooms is beyond ridiculous.

Yes, coming from a con who can't manage to get a small washroom finished in over a year. Really no room to criticize anyone. Also considering she lives in a run down farmhouse she has no room to talk at all.

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

frankly, I like his style but more importantly he doesn’t shout talk (like Fanny and Pathetic) during his videos so he is already way ahead in my book

I like him too, strange to relate. It was when he said he's not out to claim to be an expert or pretend to be someone he's not. Before that, I thought he was trying to sound posh. That gained him a lot of respect. He won mine for sure. When he talks about anything, whether it's afternoon tea, porcelain, or design, he expresses his opinions and does not speak ex-cathedra. SJ and MPK talk as if they're the font of all knowledge.

Although, I still think his face is too shiny, and I don't think I'd buy him a coffee, but I'm sure he won't mind.