The Chateau Diaries #45 And they say WE have a lousy life..

[Bored Mermaid CC]

Too much?????? No, never too much at Lalande.

View attachment 665363
SJ and BJJ can play hide and seek, in plain sight.

must have the skeleton one!

and I very much like the ones that make BJJ fade into the fabric-but my favorite is the underwear!

toile de jouy indeed!

 

[Cardinal]

The bedroom is looking pretty. The problem of the porno art on the wall - in all of her rooms - do they show images of child sex abuse? I would not be surprised if QAnon finds it and makes a big deal out of it. The chapel has already been the scene of things that QAnon might call satanic acts.

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All art is subjective of course to the viewers preference however his paintings go beyond exhibitionism and eroticism.
Most of them consist of a distinct roadmap of forbidden sexual fruit (cough cough) that crosses into sexual perversion.

 

[Marten]

From "Making antique toile into a valence".

 

[Alice Strictknickers]

Maybe she passed her Oxford exams with the minimum requirements. Sounds like she was the party type, who could care less about her Uni grades as long as she got a diploma.
Her pronounceations could be a mixture of issuses: Her being daft. Her mixing the French and English pronounciations, or just her trying to invent her own sociolect...
@
I mean, Does the rain in Spain stay mainly in the plain?

Uh oh, @ComtesseRose, watch out for the spelling police!

 

[iglie]

OMG

I switched to the French version of their site. Big Mistake ! Never do this !

If you think she made mistakes in english, what to say about her french... I'm not speaking of grammar and/or spelling mistakes (it can easily happen to native speakers too) but of her style ! That's absolutely not French at all (my bilingual teenagers living in an English speaking country do better that this woman does in her business website for her French chateau !).

Jesus, what even is this: "Les trois premières années furent difficiles - nous avons vécu au milieu de travaux de construction constants[…]", "travaux de construction"? sounds redundant in French imo, it's probably a literal translation of the English "construction work". I recently found a box full of composition books and graded assignments from elementary school and middle school and some bits on her page are very similar to the way I used to write my productions d'écrits (creative writing?) in elementary school. For a woman who presents herself as being well read it reflects poorly on her..

 

[purejuice]

I beg to differ. She says she's proud of her successful traveling, because it got her out of an abusive relationship. But it hasn't! She's still very much in one with SJ and I'm quite convinced that the fact that she alowed herself to be abused before is actually what made SJ decide to keep Nutty on, providing a bigger chance for SJ to get her claws in. She's a lost cause, clearly. Leaving the tit show at some point (because they all do, no matter the promise of a private apartment) will make her realize how nuts it all was. She needs to do a lot more traveling to get over that trauma.


Oh Lord, not that cow Dana ... If Floral Road Kill want to kill her new channel too, let Dana speak! It will all be over soon after that.


I found it disturbing Snorty Snort needed to bring up that damn squirrel wine again. Poor SJ, having to bring a teenager on your double date dinner...

Oooooh, good one, on Nati's qualification for employment by SJ. They all have a fontanel soft spot she can get her thumbs into.
Snorty is an asshole, we now comprehend. It's what he does instead of real conversation.

 

[Espe]

Well she is the star.People go there to meet sj(and the rest of the bunch).If somebody really wanted to experience France they would go to a place owned by the French.

That page is a true representation of the soap opera that it really is with the star performer featured as central to the whole circus of which she is the
"ringmistress". It is designed to appeal to the kind of people that would choose to go to Paris to see Disneyworld, rather than to visit Versailles. Anyone with any real desire to experience French life and culture would not choose to visit such a place and SJ doesn't care what image her chateau represents as long as it brings in the money from a load of suckers and as long as she can party and perform to her heart's content. All the rest is fake: pretence of being interested in history and culture. That is nonsense or she wouldn't act as she does and destroy any interesting significance that the chateau might have once had. I feel sorry for the family who sold it to her in good faith, believing that she would genuinely preserve and restore it rather than making it into a tasteless cross between a pleasure palace and a brocante.

 

[MrsPoker]

Jeez if we had a children's TV character called Blue Peter in the states we'd either draw and quarter him or elect him president. Y'all are tough.

Haha, I have never thought of it as a persons name - Blue Peter is the name of the childrens programme which started in 1958, named after a naval flag, and the emblem of the show was an old style sailing ship to represent 'a voyage of adventure'. Honestly, it was a favorite of every kid of my era and we all made the crafts they showed and sent in art to them, in the hope they might show it!

 

[iglie]

From "Making antique toile into a valence".

And here they are, ready to give even more money out to these people! Isn't the majority of her Patrons from the US? Maybe Americans are more generous and giving than other nationalities

 

[BlackWolf]

Most toiles tell a story or depict everyday life. I wish someone would design a CLL toile showing: BJJ in his beanie and in his dressing gown; BJJ chasing a dog with a cockerel in its mouth; him chasing a cockerel; BJJ with hedgehogs and cutlery; Selmar with his ruddy face in the loo; SJ rubbing a piece of pork; SJ mocking BJJ's run; SJ's claw like hand gestures and wide open mouth, opening a gift; SJ going up a ladder in high heels and a mini skirt with Ian on the ground; Nati openeing a box; Marie with some roadkill exposing her "assets"; Mummy scowling in anger; Potty prancing into the bedroom; cocktail corner; bats, mice and peacocks shitting everywhere; Nic in his paperbag (interesting that they haven't shown up yet this summer!). Maybe we could commission a CLL toile. Feel free to add to this list of scenes. Should it be bright yellow?

I really don't get the baghead issue - is he physically handicapped? or somehow stunted? If anyone knows, do tell...

 

[Cardinal]

You hit it on the head ....... Class !
It was so interesting and the time just flew watching Ms Nicolay!
When I watch old SJ doing this I skip to another spot all the time as she is long winded and theatrical ... no Oscar winner there.

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I've been so tied up haven't had the opportunity to catch up on the grift club. Who is Ms. Nicolay?

 

[purejuice]

Too much?????? No, never too much at Lalande.


SJ and BJJ can play hide and seek, in plain sight.

Good work.
I think some of Sheila Bridges Harlem toile would suit SJ, employer of the unpaid.

Harlem Toile de Jouy Wallpaper Samples - Sheila Bridges

As an African American living in Harlem, I have always been intrigued and inspired by the historical narrative of the decorative arts, especially traditional French toile with its pastoral motifs from the late 1700s. I'm entertained by the stories these patterns tell and the questions they...

www.sheilabridges.com

 

[Espe]

"wanted to have ONE private thing in her life...and it is her LOVE for Phyllis"...

She has a very odd way of showing it if it is love; she is constantly mocking him and laughing at, rather than with, him. Seeing him in that dressing gown: how could any woman fancy that, however old or young they might be? She must be pretty desperate; maybe it's to try and prove that she isn't the age she (not far off 50), and that she can still attract a young man, but really, THAT young man? There must surely be others around who would be more suitable. Maybe he's suitable because he allows her to act as she does and doesn't criticise, apart from the odd snide remark about her getting more and more like her mother. Trouble is anyone more mature or with common sense would see right through her. BJJ is a lapdog and that's all he will ever be there. He needs to get out of there before she destroys him; otherwise, he will end up marrying her and eventually becoming her carer and is it worth it for a crumbling chateau filled with junk and a lot of embarrassing paintings by Daddy?

 

[ComtesseRose]

Uh oh, @ComtesseRose, watch out for the spelling police!

I shall gladly be sent to The Penal Colony for any grammatical errors I have made.
Just don't send me to La Lande...

 

[BlackWolf]

And here they are, ready to give even more money out to these people! Isn't the majority of her Patrons from the US? Maybe Americans are more generous and giving than other nationalities

Or perhaps, just deficient in what good French culture and history should look like. But then , the Lalalalnders are apparently quite deficient too.

 

[Cardinal]

I'm not arguing, I was just stating my opinion and what works for me. I get that not everyone can justify it, but it is one of my indulgences. Yes, some IKEA stuff is great as well, I just detest going to IKEA. The one near us is huge and parking is horrible, so I don't go there much.

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Please avoid purchasing sheets from IKEA instead go to https://www.designerliving.com/
most designers and hoteliers use them.

 

[purejuice]

I mustered some courage to go watch....Marie says, "It's really helpful" as they clink their glasses. Nutti replies, "You are drunk already". No wonder the flogs are filled with giggles if she needs to drink during or before.

We speculated on the nature of the chemistry between MP and SJ -- our discovery of MP's preference for PnP is a big clue. As for SJ and MW, nothing bonds you like an addiction to your daddy, or a daddy who's addicted. Skøl! I'd forgotten noting the alacrity with which both SJ and MW jump on cocktail hour.

 

[Maria Antonia Hb]

I really don't get the baghead issue - is he physically handicapped? or somehow stunted? If anyone knows, do tell...

This one is actually a brilliant idea in script writing.. U might remember the neighbor in "home improvement"
To not show a character gives the drama something misterious

 

[purejuice]

Man, her website is a mess like the Shitoo itself. It's offensive to the eyes with her trademark oversaturated colours. It's also all about me me me... what other chateau website has four pictures of it's owner on the front page!

Grammar nazi here, her text is also littered with errors. She studied English in Oxford for crying out loud. And it's a business website. Who spells "honour" like "honer"?! Just read this page. There's more grammatical f*ck ups there than in a five-year-old's essay.

I'm really honed in on the impaired addict theory today. The fuckups, the endless unfinished projects and these huge lapses of business etiquette -- not to mention the rest.

 

[MojoDublin]

Funny :

The French version of their website is slightly different than the English version.

For example, in the French version, they mention "Meals and Drinks" and give a different price (35 euros).

"Les vendredis et samedis soirs, nous proposons un dîner de trois plats avec du vin pour 35 € par personne.

Chaque soir, nous vous proposons une collation légère de pain, fromage et vin pour 20 € par personne.

Nous ne fournissons généralement pas de déjeuners, mais sommes heureux de vous préparer un pique-nique pour 20 € par personne.

Le petit-déjeuner est inclus dans le prix de nos chambres du château, mais si vous séjournez dans l'un de nos appartements indépendants, nous pouvons vous fournir un petit-déjeuner à 15 € par personne.

Veuillez réserver vos repas au moins 24 heures à l'avance. Si vous nous faites part d'intolérances alimentaires, nous serons heureux d’en tenir compte."


Versus english version : (50 euros)


"On Friday and Saturday evenings we offer a set three-course dinner with wine for €50 per person.

Each evening we offer a light snack of bread, cheese and wine for €20 per person.

We don’t usually provide lunches, but are happy to make a picnic for you for €20 per person.

Breakfast is included in the price of our chateau bedrooms, but if you’re staying in one of our self-catering apartments, we can provide breakfast for you at €15 per person.

Please reserve any meals at least 24 hours in advance. If you let us know of any food intolerances or dislikes we’ll be happy to accommodate you."

And no prices for the accomodation... ?

Absolutely
No
Frickin

Way I’d part with 50 euro
For
FRK roadkill on a plate
It’s all brown and burnt
No matter the seasons

That’s a flipping Liberty

Carnage

When you consider it’s 13-17 euro in the village by a CHEF

Liberty