The Chateau Diaries #270 It's a good thing Snorty lays tables since he doesn't lay Fanny!

[graciemckitten]

I thought it was you @Luna20 when I read it?? Maybe it's @graciemckitten?

It isn’t me. I have never posted a comment in any Frankenfraudie or Dangerous Dan YouTube comment sections.

 

[Cleo's Asp]

The set is “graduated”. The uneducated, unemployed dullard of a Gay Twank is not.

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It's quite likely that Fanny isn't, either!

 

[Lady Di]

An organ was donated to Billy for the convent chapel.

Look at the beautiful stained glass that was donated for Fanny’s chapel. I love how it glistens and catches the light in all the right places!


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Wow-- it really is priceless and unique!

 

[Luna20]

I've just gone thru all of my clothes, and only put back clothes that fit and I like. As doing that I found an old half slip I used to wear (yay it fits me again)

Ok lets have a de-rail.

I found something very old when sorting out my clothes at the weekend. An old half slip that I bought in 1984! I'm very pleased that I fit it again. So can anyone beat 39years old for a piece of their clothing?

I have no idea what a half slip is but that thing, has been around 2 years longer then I

 

[banshee ob]

I found an old girl scout sash I must have been around 12 years old that would make it 52 years old- we wore uniforms to the Scout meetings and the sash was were you would sew your "badges" on it had the troup # sewn on the top and all the little round "badges" in rows under it. you earned the badges completing different projects. There were little pins you earned for like attendance.
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isn't the Winter salon the Green room that used to house the pool table? the room with the Daddy wallpaper in it? I did not see them put a log burner in there yet. Maybe I missed it

I still have mine as well. Wings from "flying up" from Brownies! That brought back memories as I loved being in the GS.

 

[halifax]

Hello Fellows Tattlers, I am back after several months of hard work in the garden in addition to my usual work and activities. Plenty of jams, preserves, deshydrated fruit and veg, sterilized jars, chutney, sott'olios... and still struggling to make good pickles.
I am far behind and won't be able to catch up but apparently nothing has changed. When I look at the play list, there is almost no content, a lot of fuss to show nothing, just vacuity.
To know what's going on, I just read a few comments below the videos and that was enough!

No central heating yet?????

Snorts is still there gigoletting, as revolting as usual. FRK did not understand the lesson and is glued at the dump.

Gwen is launching a personal development business at the château and convent.
Many friends came to help Billy in Norwich and he treated them well in a great manor house! I remember the open days when SJ gave her patreons a small bag of lavender and some dried leaves + a postcard left by the previous owners, and not enough food for lunch....
Thanks to the Norwich expedition, "The Moons" got many more subscribers. Great!!! As an animals lover I am very happy for them.

I am wondering if Sadie and Mo have split up????? Nowhere to be seen, no vlogs. ?????

sadie said that moe has a full time job, that plus his own business doesnt leave him enough time to vlog. I did see him with sadie in one of billys vlogs then everyone was leaving for england

 

[Lindab68]

Mais oui. Even when the Gay Twank pays, she pays. He has no money of his own. No actual income. It all comes from the Cougar Chatelaine and goes right back to her. He is a kept manchild. He has nothing. In the end, the stuff he buys and hoards is all hers and he is just one fight, just one indiscretion away from losing it all…which pray Tattle will happen soon.

You know what I've been carefully absorbing. Philip and Marie are getting to chummy and cosy. Is it just me but something tells me they're having an affair!!!!!

 

[marotta]

The dress she wore in Portugal made her face look completely washed out.

 

[banshee ob]

Oh, it’s ready, by golly.

What????? I thought that was Mr. Bean!!!

 

[Pyke]

In France we’ve also had a cheese board for that sort of money

I would expect shares in the cheese company for that amount.

 

[billybudd]

I used to watch Martijn in the early days of his mountain cabin reno. I loved his attention to detail and his vlogs were beautifully filmed (all by himself most of the time), and they were a great escape and contrast to the madness of Lalande. He honed his talking head art and his photographic skills during his extensive solo travels prior to settling in Italy. His previous vlogs also make fascinating viewing for anyone interested.

However, I am sorry to say I have a real 'bone to pick' with him and stopped watching a while ago.

In most of his videos, one way or the other, he extols the virtues and charm of the mountains and valleys, especially the peace and quiet. He points out that he can sometimes hear the cow bells from far away as they come home for the day from distant pastures, the birds calling high up in the sky, the wind in the trees across the valley and the occasional chatter of farmers way down below him at the end of the day. He values the isolation and peace that he has found. It's all very idyllic.

Until....... he started his renovation work.

He set up a large bank of solar panels for power (understandably), but then proceeded for months and months on end to relentlessly cut up wood, grind stone, and brag about being able to work deep into the night on his projects with increasingly more robust power tools and light sources.

How can he think that he is not being a huge, selfish, anti-social nuisance to his neighbours? He knows how noise carries in those deep mountain valleys - he has made vlogs about how far the sound travels. He has shown us some other secluded summer homes used for holidays by his neighbours. He has shown us farms in the valley where, presumably, the workers get up early, work hard, and value their night's sleep. And he has introduced us to a priest that lives a stone's throw away from him who, presumably, needs to go away regularly for a quiet retreat, just to get away from the place he thought was going to be his quiet retreat!

If I lived anywhere in that valley and I had a neighbour whose reno had taken as long as his has (the way things are going it will be almost as long as Fanny's) then I would really really resent him for regularly shattering my peace and quiet. Maybe he has stopped it now, I have not watched for a while, but even when I stopped it had already been going on for way too long.

His only neighbor I can tell is Father Johannes, officially a hermit monk who moved up there with his abbot's permission to be alone. They seem to be on perfectly cordial terms as part of Johannes' deal is also video eremite stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/@donjojohannes

I'm not sure what is "too long" for a renovation conducted mainly by hand and alone. He works every day, as you point out, and some of the days are very long. I think he will certainly flip the property when he's finished, which is his prerogative, but he will have had the pleasure of making every inch of his own vision come true with his own hands. He interacts with the locals and hires local artisans, for example to upcycle the old timber floors of one of the huts into new windows. He is perhaps a little too absorbed in his own process -- no volunteer is allowed to film with a plastic water bottle, for example, because he thinks of the place as a movie set.
I think he can be dinged for one thing alone. The lone wolf renovator taking unacceptable risks -- Dan is wildly out of control is this department, drilling metal beams with flying sparks and shrapnel, no safety goggles. Doolard more cleverly inserts Xtreme Reno stunts quietly manhandling single-handed two ton stones, or standing on the very edge of a 3K foot precipice on a weekly basis. Dan now routinely does the same.
Still, this was always the appeal of reno blogs, vlogs, and TV shows. Doolard's is one of the best I've ever seen, if not the best. His problem-solving skills are what's on display, and he's good at it, even if hand-carved chestnut log rain gutters is not your bag.
Disturbing his "neighbors" and sticking to a house flipper's deadline, not so much.

 

[M&MsMom]

I am nothing like Snorts but I do like Cornish pottery. This vlog I found fascinating.

I watched this, too, this afternoon! I don't always watch their videos, but I always enjoy the ones I do watch, like this one. It's refreshing to watch a vlog and not wonder if someone's not telling the truth, mugging for the camera......

 

[MRShavershamsdress]

that's what i thought too when i saw that backside. the quicky in the car, the quicky behind some old tree in the park etc. not necesarily with ollie

Definitely with Snorty McFuckface either!

 

[NotAChatelaine]

Here is a garden gnome that would be paaaaarfect for Frankenfraudie’s garden:
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Perfection!

 

[Pyke]

I am nothing like Snorts but I do like Cornish pottery. This vlog I found fascinating.

 

[graciemckitten]

Hannah just posted a trip to Fortnum and Mason highlighting Halloween food offerings.She will be posting weekly videos until the end of the year on holiday decorations and offerings from stores and areas around London. I like Hannnah’s videos.

 

[CocktailGirl]

We think there has been some kind of accident out on the road in the vicinity of the dump.
Maybe guests, heating contractors, a chapel restorer, a courier . . . the baguette lady.

Maybe an accident involving that Aston Martin that Amaury was swooning over in the last vlog? Fast cars, narrow country roads...................slippery peacock

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

To help PhiPhi transition to life after LaLande, I’ve taken the liberty of writing his resume.


Philip “Snorts” Jansen
Château de la Lande
36140 Crozon-sur-Vauvre, France
Attn: PhiPhi


Goal
To acquire a job where I can do as little work as possible while traveling and spending copious amounts of money on alcohol, porcelain, and tat. Will assume any position.


Job History

Actor

Oklahoma! Played the role of a cowboy. Even though I’ve never seen a real cowboy in my life, I practiced for the role by assuming the reverse cowgirl position in bed.

Weird Gay Play Played the role of some guy in a weird gay play. I had to kiss a man, and I liked it.

LaLande Played the role of the young boyfriend of an aging chatelaine In exchange for travel, food, lodging, and a monthly allowance. Nailed the part, especially when I called the old hag “dahling.” Convinced thousands of viewers that I am the “real deal.”

Video Editor

Edit videos for Chateau Diaries and its many off-shoot channels. Met deadlines some of the time (as long as it didn’t interfere with more enjoyable things). Re-edited videos after their release to remove footage deemed unflattering to the aging chatelaine.

Tablescaper

Set the table for dinners at LaLande using a variety of porcelain, crystal, and flatware of questionable taste. Famous for my tinfoil candle straightening hack (patent pending).

Education

Completed two years of University. Currently on my “skip” year(s). No experience with videography, architecture, design, construction, or fashion (doesn‘t seem to matter in my current job).

Other Interests

Must have sex every day, male or female…doesn’t matter. I have a love for hedgehogs and an affinity for squirrels. Connoisseur of shoe polish used to hide the bald spots on my head. I enjoy wearing women’s clothes and raid my aging “girlfriend’s” wardrobe whenever possible.

Brilliant just Brillant
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As the Chateauverse is a bit slow today. Of course not for Alla (Dreaming of a Chateau) she is busy everyday. Check out make do grow in Portugal 3 year transformation of an old stone house empty for 20 years. Could not find construction people to use more natural products, they have done most of the work themselves... amazing. Especially Kiley she is a workhorse

 

[Luna20]

I think Sean and his wife are going for a rustic vibe in the garden. I get what they are trying to do. It is hard to do though and he’s just made too many little nooks and crannies to keep up with. I am guilty of having done that myself. I like how there’s fruit trees and little tufts of color and little stone things and paths. What he’s done along the front is very cute and he’s tidying things up quite a bit. It’s just him working so, I would imagine it’s hard to keep up with it all. He worked as a contractor for many years, and definitely has skills. He’s said he hurt his back a year or so ago, when he fell off a ladder and was laid out for a while. His wife doesn’t want him working on the roof unless he will be very safe so he’s going to use scaffolding.

I earn my entire living buying and selling antiques, collectibles, and furniture. I make over six figures annually. I totally respect Sean and his wife’s selections of antiques and they get good prices for their items and have a great reputation on Etsy. His cutting boards are also well worth the money as well. I’m in an upscale market and people go nuts for the copper items he searches for, they bring crazy prices. HI also know how hard it is in that business to know when to stop working and take care of your home. It’s tough. Every minute I work on the house or yard costs me money. I’m am always on the hunt, polishing something, painting something, cleaning something, fixing something, picking something up, delivering something, or god knows what else. It may not look like much, but it is quite a talent to leave the house with $500 and come home the same day with sale-able items worth $3000. I’ve also made thousands of dollars picking up items put out for collection and either fixing or up cycling them. I cannot just drive by a pile of old furniture. It’s like money laying on the ground.

I’m fortunate that my husband shares my joy of making money out of thin air. He used to go with his grandfather picking antiques when he was a little boy. He’s actually better at it than I am, but he won’t retire for another 4 years, so he just messes around a little bit with it from time to time.

He once bought a giant (100 feet long) American flag for $100 and resold it to a casino in Las Vegas for $6500.

Anyways, that’s my Sean-fending, I don’t love the buy me a coffee or drill, but at least you know he’ll buy it, use it, fix something, and film it.

Where can I subscribe to your YT channel?

If you don't mind me asking. What was the most valueable item you picked up from a collection pile?

 

[TorontoGWM]

Bringing faux history back via plastic, polystyrene, resin and astroturf!

Cha-faux chic!

What else would we expect from a guy in a rayon/nylon soccer shirt?