Much as we all value
@Clara Burnett ’s magnificent intel, she is not the only one who has an inside track. I cannot say how this has fallen into my hands, but Stephaneee left her phone on record last night and grainy footage and her conversation with Phi Phi as they approached Framlington was accidentally recovered for posterity.
Fanny: Philip darling. Above all things, you must remember to be considerate to Mummee at all times.
Phi Phi: I will be considerate to Mummee, darling.
F: I am glad. We must be considerate to Mummee. She is approaching 80.
PP: I know, I will be.
F: And she had just travelled from South Africa…
PP: Indeed
F: And she has had so many health issues and so we must be mindful and considerate
PP: Yes darling. Considerate and mindful.
F: And then she is looking after Percy. He is very frail. We should put their needs first.
PP: Yes darling. Put their needs first, be mindful and considerate.
F: HERE WE ARE. MUMMEE Hello.
M: Darling. How wonderful to see you. I have missed you. Hello Philip. Darling, how was your journey?
F: Oh never mind about that now Mummee. It is past midnight.
M: I know, I am so tired but did what you said, and have waited up.
F: Well Mummy, I have not done my Patron vid that was due out several hours ago so I want you and Percy to do an interview.
M: Of course darling. When?
F: Now Mummee.
M: But darling I am tired, and Percy is in bed asleep.
F: Well get him up and dressed. He is on camera in five. And for goodness sake, wipe that miserable look off your face.
M: But darling, I am jet lagged from my flight from S Africa and Percy is exhausted.
F: Never mind that Mummee. Think. $33,000 a month. A drink will loosen us all up. I don’t want to do this either you know, but we can’t deal with any more complaints. They think something should be happening at the chateau, they want their Patron Day, they want a vid TONIGHT. They are so demanding. Where is the gin?
M: Darling. I have nothing alcoholic in the house. Percy and I only arrived a few hours ago.
F: What! We cannot do a Patron vid unless we are oiled. Phone Gerry and get him to bring some round.
M: Stephanee. He has just worked a ten hour shift. We cannot ask it of him.
F: He is a taxi driver. He will know where to get booze in the middle of the night. Get him up. Philip. Go and bang on his door and wake him up. Think of Meeee. I have a patron vid to do. Mummee – get Percy ready and prop him up at the table.
…………
F: (Having drunk a bottle or two, laughed loudly at nothing, talked about nothing except what Mummee will enjoy at the chateau – and find that as it is looking at structural improvements, can think of none that have been completed, shouts: That’s a wrap.
F: Well, it is 2am and Philip has been up since 6am and I have been up since 2.30pm, I am off to bed. Philip – make sure you have that vid edited and uploaded before you retire to the sofa – I do not want to be disturbed until Mummee wakes me at 10.30am. Remember Philip. Be considerate!.
The final shot finds Phi Phi staggering to Fanny’s door at 4am having uploaded the Patron Vid. Not wishing her disturbed, he can be seen tacking a note to her bedroom door which reads: Do NOT WAKE ME BEFORE LATE AFTERNOON FOR ANY REASON and then returns to his sofa.
) and I’ve been “reported” a time or two. Just hang in there…sometimes it can be a bumpy ride!
Oh @Pekey speedy recovery.
