Michael is up...
The Chateau Diaries #161 Proceed with caution, Demented Diabolical Damsel of Disaster ahead!
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He's her licking peacockGreetings from scorchingly hot London! I quite enjoyed watching tonight’s CD vlog (that’s called sarcasm). Social climbers be like—-“Let’s live like the Crawleys of Downton Abbey!” I now also realize how vital PhiPhi is to Stephanie. You know what they say, “every girl needs a gay bestfriend.”
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Them two—shopping together; tidying up together, mani-pedi together. PhiPhi is Stephanie’s essential gay bestfriend (with benefits).
I wish she would send him to be properly groomed. Chop off that nasty hair, clean that patchy beard/neck and wax off those curly Q hairs on the chest. But unfortunately she can't keep herself clean 90% of the time 
greasy mop hair, nails always picking at something, unwashed or no knickers. Just GROSS
So… not a coke nail?I think I’ve found the reason for the Sir Snorts a lot mani’s…
Going back to SJ being socially awkward and not really liking people - I came across this video on YT that illustrates this very thing albeit with a different narc (fascinating to those of us who enjoy the old people watching stuff):
And why is dumb Dan growing his beard down his neck too?
Do Stupid Steve and Dumb Dan REALLY think Stinky Snorts is someone to emulate???
For Goodness sake...clean your asses up!
Do Stupid Steve and Dumb Dan REALLY think Stinky Snorts is someone to emulate???
For Goodness sake...clean your asses up!
And at an Emmaus too - a charity which was created to support the homeless (but actually is a Victorian workhouse dressed as a charity) - shame on you Vivienne.
I must say it’s fascinating that our Stephanie is able to meet her Thursday regular scheduled programming because it affects her personal expenditure. ‘Never mind about those bloody ignorant patreons who’ve given me their money at the start of each month for three years now - that can wait for when I’m ready.’
Stephanie has truly decided that convertible is her new ride now - screw Nick’s runaround he bought for the HMN, it’s not good enough for SJ; screw mummy and dodgy eyes; screw being humble. The prestige of a droptop is what befits our Stephanie. Please get a grip girl, the ego is so inflated. These indiscretions can only further the gulf between Stephanie’s truth and the reality - things don’t add up with her whizzing around in a sports car, a flat in London, shopping for designer fashion, Cartier tank watches, contrasted with her poor woe Is me act of 2020. She needs to shut that Patreon down because she could pay for the renovation from her own purse like most decent people would be doing in her situation.
Phyllis comes down to the kitchen only when he wants something or “when I make tuna pasta salad” - arrogant balding shite. He truly is foul to the core. He contributes nothing meaningful to the chateau running or renovations instead all we get is just his desperate attempts at pun humour and this fabricated appreciation for wildlife (oh and far too many cameltoe sightings). It’s all smoke and mirrors. He really glaringly shows the age and power disparity between himself and Stephanie when he says on bended knee “can we get a puppy? can we get a hedgehog?” It’s uncomfortable viewing.
I can’t understand how Stephanie gets away with it - every single week there is a new kick in the teeth moment. She has no respect for anybody outside her one person only bubble. Tomorrow I’m going to volunteer again for the last time before I go on holiday (which I’ve been feeling guilty about because nobody, including the other volunteers, can afford a holiday in today’s economic climate), if the recipients knew of Stephanie’s antics I’m sure they’d be appalled. It’s just another world for people who really need urgent charitable assistance. Such a sad thing to contrast. The vast quantities of food, the dressing gowns, the champagne, shopping trips, the arrogance, the ignorance….
I truly hope she can be stopped pronto.
Thank you @ComtesseRose for a fresh new thread and recaps! 
And a shout-out to @OneMoonbeam for a fabulous new title! 
And a shout-out to @OneMoonbeam for a fabulous new title! 
I've given up on ever being a VIP but oohhh...named a threadThank you @ComtesseRose for a fresh new thread and recaps!
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You’re already half way to vip with an awesome avatar, never give up! Don’t forget about the money, getting paid to be a VIP tartlet makes it that much more fun.I've given up on ever being a VIP but oohhh...named a thread
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Imagine being Vivienne or Fiona, for whom life apparently has no more thrilling event than spending the weekend at Lalande.
Time for my weekly citation of No Strings, the early 60s musical Richard Rodgers wrote for the wonderful Diahann Carroll, who won a Tony for her performance. It's the first he wrote without Hammerstein. It's about Eurotrash society.
Step up, my friend, and be my host.
Sorry @billybudd I’ve been away from my devices all day. Ironically I’ve been at a Bastille Day bbq with my other half and his family. The holiday is important to them as his mother is French and father is Haitian. Today’s feast was more a traditional bbq. My mother’s family always did gallons of gumbo, court bouillon and etouffee. There were traditionally pork and seafood dishes, but the only thing I remember special were venison sausages and galette des rois. Granted we are talking memories that are almost 50 years old, so of questionable reliability.
You, like our beloved @Heathcliffe, are VIPs in our minds and hearts! (Plus the lot of you have stolen to keys to the VIP lounge and jet a while ago!) Well played!I've given up on ever being a VIP but oohhh...named a thread
I check in every month or so to find out what’s going on since I no longer watch CD or the vomit inducing gift grab. It’s been awhile and I have to say that it’s been fun to catch up on the threads. You all are a treasure! After a particularly trying week, you’ve put a smile on my face. Many, many thanks to each of you for your comments and for fighting the good fight to hold Fanny accountable for her spending.
I have to add, Stuart and Maria's explanation of the food was interesting -- the ochre soup was Lalande-grown tomato-courgette-coriander with a creme fraiche quenelle.
The salmagundi salad was endive on a bed of ricotta sage, with grapefruit, grapes, mint, lemon balm, fennel and celery flowers. Endive and grapefruit strike me as a stern pairing with not enough to offset the astringent aspect. A dish should only have one bitter thing in it.
Roasted onions with pink peppercorns, rosemary, oregano, thyme flowers stuffed into a gigantic raw zucchini.
Duck with black currant sauce by Dan.
Roasted homegrown potatoes.
Zucchini cake with lemon, cardamom, raspberries, strawberry coulis.
There was a salubrious effort to serve fresh food from the garden. Putting zucchini in everything reminds me of the days when the hippies were just starting to plant their own gardens and every day another 10 pound zucchini was discovered and had to be eaten. They put it in everything. The tomato soup. The cake. It's not nice.
I have to say too many herbs and pungent spice like cardamom isn't nice either. Sage and endive and grapefruit might be good together. With mint, lemon balm, fennel and celery? I don't know.
There are a plethora of grapefruit sage cocktails that are trendy -- that might be the inspo Stuart is using for the unusual infusion with the ricotta.
The emphasis on fresh seems to have been an enterprise of Stuart's -- to dig the onions and potatoes and pick the black currants which presumably were hanging around with the 25-foot-long zucchinis waiting for Maria to come out of the house? A for effort, girleen.
I would have served the zucchini on its own-- charcoal grilled, with the halved onions, dressed with some of the duck fat? -- instead of using it as a throwaway stealth ingredient in the soup and cake.
And, with herbs as with accessories, take at least four off before you leave the house.
The salmagundi salad was endive on a bed of ricotta sage, with grapefruit, grapes, mint, lemon balm, fennel and celery flowers. Endive and grapefruit strike me as a stern pairing with not enough to offset the astringent aspect. A dish should only have one bitter thing in it.
Roasted onions with pink peppercorns, rosemary, oregano, thyme flowers stuffed into a gigantic raw zucchini.
Duck with black currant sauce by Dan.
Roasted homegrown potatoes.
Zucchini cake with lemon, cardamom, raspberries, strawberry coulis.
There was a salubrious effort to serve fresh food from the garden. Putting zucchini in everything reminds me of the days when the hippies were just starting to plant their own gardens and every day another 10 pound zucchini was discovered and had to be eaten. They put it in everything. The tomato soup. The cake. It's not nice.
I have to say too many herbs and pungent spice like cardamom isn't nice either. Sage and endive and grapefruit might be good together. With mint, lemon balm, fennel and celery? I don't know.
There are a plethora of grapefruit sage cocktails that are trendy -- that might be the inspo Stuart is using for the unusual infusion with the ricotta.
The emphasis on fresh seems to have been an enterprise of Stuart's -- to dig the onions and potatoes and pick the black currants which presumably were hanging around with the 25-foot-long zucchinis waiting for Maria to come out of the house? A for effort, girleen.
I would have served the zucchini on its own-- charcoal grilled, with the halved onions, dressed with some of the duck fat? -- instead of using it as a throwaway stealth ingredient in the soup and cake.
And, with herbs as with accessories, take at least four off before you leave the house.
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After watching the new Top Gun movie, I figured out how to steal the VIP jet. No one even knew it was missing for a while.
Be careful- our darling @Heathcliffe may blame you for the disappearance of our beloved @MojoDublin ! "What is this? Taken? Am I 'Tooken'?!?" You don't want a @Heathcliffe rescue operation- he'd deploy with just a calculator, a photo of our beloved @Jeeves and find where you failed on your taxes! Scary stuff!And now back to our regularly scheduled programme- The Shattiest Little Whorehouse in France. Fanny's latest prolific offering to the YouTube-iverse showcased such highlights as: Fanny awoke early (did she really? Or was she still awake from the previous evening?) to totter off to the Boulangerie to purchase baked goods for the guests before they awoke. (And place the goods in a cloth bag of questionable cleanliness.) Home girl was riding solo, as
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OMG .... that is so funny but ....... I will see that every time I see the Squirrel now--I think I hate you DEEPblue82
Heya gorgeous @Pekey, were you able to finally get your heating sorted? Hugs to Yum Yum and you!OMG .... that is so funny but ....... I will see that every time I see the Squirrel now--I think I hate you DEEPblue82
Can’t imagine myself in a play suit. . . . .and off she goes and buys it. Maybe because she’s going to play Barbie. . . .PhiPhi will be Ken (no personal parts, makes sense then).
I wanted to reach through the screen, yank Phi Phi aside and ask him to please go shampoo his hair - my GOD it was all but dripping with grease, or curl gel or something. And please stop with the white nail polish Phi Phi. Please Phi Phi we get it, you are a girl boy - thank you. Message received. She’s on a total narcissist high surrounded by friends, all adoring - one cheap ass outfit after the next. Free robes from 100 Stars. Of course. More crap for the ”crap-teau” or maybe the kitchen, or maybe one of the rooms or maybe the squirrel shop. Onward. . . .although I can hardly stand to watch much less fast forward. Waiting for Mummy to roll in from South Africa. Cold day in hell perhaps, but keep hoping heads will roll.
I wanted to reach through the screen, yank Phi Phi aside and ask him to please go shampoo his hair - my GOD it was all but dripping with grease, or curl gel or something. And please stop with the white nail polish Phi Phi. Please Phi Phi we get it, you are a girl boy - thank you. Message received. She’s on a total narcissist high surrounded by friends, all adoring - one cheap ass outfit after the next. Free robes from 100 Stars. Of course. More crap for the ”crap-teau” or maybe the kitchen, or maybe one of the rooms or maybe the squirrel shop. Onward. . . .although I can hardly stand to watch much less fast forward. Waiting for Mummy to roll in from South Africa. Cold day in hell perhaps, but keep hoping heads will roll.
SJ sunk to a whole new low with tonight's vlog -- and with her "blocked week for just friends and family." It was nothing more than a paid, influencer event sponsored by onehundredstars.co.uk. In case you don't know what an influencer event is, it generally involves a vendor inviting influencers mostly from youtube and instagram to a location, putting them up in a hotel, feeding and entertaining them, giving large gift bags of freebies, and instructing them how to push their product. For more, check this out: https://www.irosesocial.com/marketing/experiential-event-ideas-to-boost-your-influencer-campaigns
What happened at HMN was one of the more "experiential" events. But the twist is the event was disguised as a country weekend party. I bet SJ and Phyllis negotiated a location fee, and all the rooms for the invited guests (including Isabella's) plus most of the meals (at the very least the completely pathetic "robe breakfast") were paid for by onehundredstars.co.uk.
The icing on the cake was SJ's feigned surprise at receiving her own robe. Why can't she just admit that it is a sponsored video?
Personally, I can't stand the robes. I don't know anyone who would wear them. Perhaps they appeal to a woman of a certain age. The loungers and scroungers of Lalande fawn over them because they are told to and because they receive one themselves.
Isabella from onehundredstars.co.uk reminds me a lot of the misguided Christie's expert who thought a "collaboration" with the most famous YouTubegrifter chatelaine of all time would be mutually beneficial. Can Isabella's bosses actually be pleased with these types of Lalande images promoting their wares? I find them repulsive. Isabella's job title might be changing again some time next week.
What happened at HMN was one of the more "experiential" events. But the twist is the event was disguised as a country weekend party. I bet SJ and Phyllis negotiated a location fee, and all the rooms for the invited guests (including Isabella's) plus most of the meals (at the very least the completely pathetic "robe breakfast") were paid for by onehundredstars.co.uk.
The icing on the cake was SJ's feigned surprise at receiving her own robe. Why can't she just admit that it is a sponsored video?
Personally, I can't stand the robes. I don't know anyone who would wear them. Perhaps they appeal to a woman of a certain age. The loungers and scroungers of Lalande fawn over them because they are told to and because they receive one themselves.
Isabella from onehundredstars.co.uk reminds me a lot of the misguided Christie's expert who thought a "collaboration" with the most famous YouTube
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