The Chateau Diaries #155 Snorty is a big time vlog killer! Just like 11 year old preserves he is not good

[Princess and the Pea]

Everything is that workshop, to me anyway, just looks too perfect, too clean like it's hardly every been usedif at all. I do wonder he's ever had to work to a deadline for a customer. He should try living in my world, my poor husband trying to keep on schedule when customers keep f'kin it up all the time. I just wonder if he's just been playing at it and this is the first 'real' large scale work he's ever taken on. Something just doesn't add up to me.

Think I said this a while ago. It seems lik

@JackSpratt I wonder if he's just been a fabricator, making just window and door frames, i think its clear he wasn't worked on major projects before, too much of a perfectionist, time is money but i guess when its not your money there is no problem.
didn't he fit a new window in fannys London flat?
Again you can see he has no experience working with a client, he should be keeping fanny in check with deadline, as hes the one with the skills out of the two of them.

I think the kids in this family are spoiled rotten. Indulged by wealthy parents who have earned enough cash to support their children in their 'hobbies'. So both Fanny & Cuz have been allowed to follow their dreams with no need of actually earning any cash to support themselves. Coupla bums the pair of them.
Frankly if Amaury was on piecework rate he'd have gone bust by now.

 

[Sparrowsfart]

Just watching DTM's latest vlog. He has made a, shite garden just like Fanny's...... A few minutes in and a rat crawled out of the wall of his house and ran along. He was oblivious

Do you have a time stamp? Have been trying to see the rat but can't find it.

Sorry was watching the wrong video have found it now!

 

[Kickintheass]

SJ called a date to make sure families with childeren couldn't come.
1. She hates childeren
2. Middle aged and older people have more disposable income.
It's a smart and diplomatic move tbh.

So since La Jarvis bookmarks my comments, here is some advice from someone with a degree(s) in international business, marketing & communication
Gurl no, eeew no, just no.
A tour and some light lunch is a fuck you to all the people who made it possible to buy the antiques, art, holidays, expensive wine etc (@Lady Avonlea has the spreadsheet in case you forgot)
If you want to sustain this lifestyle use the patreon day as a try out to make your Royal dump an event Venue for events which suits the Lalande narrative. Costume balls, themed parties.

Reduce the number of visitors to 100/150.
Run to the Marie, fire department, insurance companies to get everything in order.
Talk with neighbouring sites and come to an agreement that your guests can stay there and they are shuttled back and forth to your place by said hosts.
Hire sufficient staff, security, rent out all the rooms and appartments.
Book musician/DJ
Book dancefloor
Organize ball (what kind of theme)
Lighting/decor/flowers
Plan the food for breakfast and dinner and make arrangements for their deliveries. Inform the local bakery on time so they can schedule it too.
Plan a day activity
Plan a evening activity like movie night out in the back.
Order bracelets which can't be taken off, so you will know who is on the guesstlist and who is not.

All the patreons will be blown away and they will certainly return. After the event, you sit down and see how much everything has costs you. So you know exactly what the basic costs are.
You then squeal how much you have enjoyed it and start planning your next event, larger and charge fully let's say 750 for 3 days and 2 nights.
Do this a couple of times a year and you don't have to open your B&B, make much more money, and have always something to film. Plus you actually will support local business.

While at it, ask Ian to finish the appartment asap another room to rent out!

Ps my consultancy fee is €275 p/h ex VAT, you got it for free

What about include souvenir goody bag? I'm sure the tattle contributors could make suggestions for it's contents.

 

[Princess and the Pea]

As always, I will hold off on commenting on those specifics. I will say that people (some that read here) will be shocked to read that we are not a group of grannies. We are actually a group that ranges from 20 somethings to a few grannies. (We love our grannies). Our leads are a French Maitre (for those in the US a Lawyer) and a reporter for a popular online news organization who both happened to be early Patreon supporters too. We are all connected in various ways and found it easy to make additional connections in year one. Thankfully, we have a few dollars and social media/media knowledge between us. We hope to open a few eyes to the danger of social media "influencers" when stated intentions become lies to fuel a machine.

One more time - for the record - we are NOT trying to take down SJ et al. I hope the information that comes out does not damage her reputation at all... rise some eyebrows... yes. I just hope she learns from this experience. She could put it all to rest by just having a very open and honest video about the lie she sold from day one on Patreon.

I hate long posts so I am sorry. One other thing. Reality shows are popular. In the US they surpass most scripted shows. Truth is stranger than fiction. I hope Ruthy (sp?) is taking great notes.

I get your drift now. I rescind my comment about wanting to take SJ et al down. I understand what your intent is & that it is without malice.

 

[billybudd]

Can one of you geniuses please remind me in which video Jarvis lists the endangered species at Lalande that the water police say she must protect?
I have lost that brain cell.
But am very greatful. So greatful.

 

[JackSpratt]

No I usually read tattle at the dinning room table.

Me too, sometimes I spoil myself and read Tattle in bed but don't tell anyone.

 

[suthern_lurker]

And I’m just over here wondering what the heck is in that basket SJ is holding???

That ain’t no basket those are the delightful earmuffs that Squirrel boy bought for Fanny which she wore with glee, just like any other 3 year old on the street.

Oh my bad!!!
Are those stuffed animals on the earMuffs???
Now that’s adorable-
sorry I missed that!
I was thinking a basket of puppies or kittens!!!
Must be squirrels though!!!

Mo has just announced on Sadie in France that he has a new and upcoming YouTube channel. It will be dedicated to cooking, lifestyle, weightloss and exercise... and for some obscure reason (I think I heard this right) car restoration? A sports advisor/fitness coach before their move to France, Mo says he's hoping people will enjoy his content, support his channel and that the fitness aspect will be catering to those who have not exercised before, plus for those wanting to get back into fitness. He says it will not be strenuous exercise and be a channel that's very different to what's gone before.

“Support his channel”.
That is key!!!
Send $$$

Also love the Sadie and Ma Peth will be his first class of students!

 

[On Repeat]

That's bad subtitling there I am afraid. Not defending the bully but that isn't what she said. Listening to it - she says I am 'phobic' referring to spiders & stuff. Thinking that we have to be accurate in any accusations I guess.

View attachment 1370950

Regardless, we don't want her here!

 

[Tea with lemon]

What is Natti's job? She doesn't answer e-mails, she opens and stacks gifts, she doesn't cook, she doesn't clean, she doesn't do the shopping, she's rarely on camera any more... Got her slippers well and truly under the bed there.

Maybe SJ "stuck" with her. We have seen that Natti is signed in the founding papers of the Association as, it seems to me (I do not remember well), a treasurer.

 

[mousepanda8]

DTM spends quite some time now at his „former“ house. So they are in the off phase in their on off on relationship?
In a pause? Or is the YouTube and Patreon money way to good for a real separation? Are they playing with the viewers?

Does Annaliese really want to live in that half finished stable with the kids? Guess she cuts a big part of Dan’s income when they play happy family.

I guess if they purchased it in both his and annalises name - if they want it to be worth anything they have to fix it up ( even if its just to sell later)
I know Dan is not always a great dad but if he's trying to spend some time with the boys that's good. He also cant really bring the boys to the chiteau all the time as that place seems to be a death trap for small children with the stuff everywhere and with the new diggers and log choppers on site as well
(although the new well isnt much better)

 

[Luna20]

Reply from de lalacelle to my comment that montages of things already done lazy vlogs


Highlighted reply
View attachment 1366114
Escape To The Dream, Restoring The Château.
20 hours ago
Thank you but this is far from a lazy video, the amount of work to create it took a week to put together and to find each clip from over a year of work. As you will have seen we have been working on the cottage to get the cottage watertight. Kind regards
Show less

I think they missed my point that we have already seen it so whats new. Tell me is this reply better than a delete???

He replied! Much better than delete.
He has got a point though. Finding old footage if it is not organized in folders will take ages.

 

[billybudd]

Besides, Stephanie is getting sloppy and her fans eat it up. Stephanie could take a piss in the fountain and call it performance art, and you just know the likes of Cynthia Lambert and Caroline Gooder would be like: "Oh Stephanie, I have never experienced performance art in my life, to now have seen such niche artform with the magical joy of Lalande in the background word can not describe the emotions I am feeling etc. etc."

Exactly what they'll be selling in the Squirrel Shoppe.

 

[Fennelbug]

They definitely did not clean that room. Stephanie said Dave cleaned it.

If Scotman’s apartment has been viewed on CH4 why hasn’t Stephanie shown her Patrons?

Philip is a LAZY LADYFINGERS- what a loser.

 

[Fennelbug]

That's good info. I was more interested in why Pheeph would call across the courtyard on camera to somebody who was obviously avoiding him by scuttling along the perimeter of the courtyard (avoiding booze maybe, but also perhaps fresh from a liaison Pheeph knows about.
(I wouldn't put it past Pheeph, if Grant is teetotal, to screw him over on camera around it.
(The question remains -- why?)
And here, on the scruples of Mother Abbess Clara who rightly does not speculate about philanderers with families, I must shut my tattling mouth.

I think Grant drinks beer? I recall him doing so recently? LadyDesk is useless and Grant is disgusted with how lazy he is. He doesn’t need to hide his disdain ( like Dan and Amaury) because he has nothing to lose- he is a contributing member to the Chateau not a sissy leech.

 

[ComtesseRose]

I’m sorry I missed my chance to name the last thread. I was sleeping. So I would like to get my name for #156 on the record just incase. Does anyone know how long a thread title can be?

Current thread title is the best indication of max capacity.

 

[mrsp67]

I am guessing dumb Dan, Grant and Bag head....he FINALLY bagged...er, shagged Fanny....after pining for decades. She has to be desperate for some sex with a man by now.
Snorts ain't cutting the mustard. Or the mayo.

He’s is a real man compared to the rest or looks like a real man but if he’s a cheater he’s not.

Or is it her on her dad's lap? My eyes aren't that great..

Looks like a daddy photo

 

[Summerbaby]

Of the 3,500 Patrons, I wonder how many actually watch the weekly Patreon vlogs? As of a moment ago, last night's vlog appears to.have had 791 views - less than 25% - and obviously some of those views should be discounted from the patron rollcall.

Strictly speaking, because an opportunity to attend the "annual Garden Party" is part of the membership spiel from the lowest tier (Peasant Patrons?) up to the heady heights of Dauphin and Dauphine, every supporter via Patreon should be made aware of the event with some sort of cheery e-communiqué. Who am I trying to kid? This is Lalande, home of incompetence, inefficiency, laziness and an arrogant disregard for common courtesy.

In any event, I can't believe the take up will be anything other than tiny. But Ken, the dodgy retired pastor with his questionable wardrobe will be there, so that's nice.

And if Stephanie thinks announcing this proposed gathering in some way abrogates her of the legal obligation of the Association's officers to hold an AGM and provide a financial report, she's even more of a bloody fool than I thought.

I agree 100% with everything you have said.
Apart from -
This is Lalande, home of incompetence, inefficiency, laziness and an arrogant disregard for common courtesy.
It is simply Stephanie Jarvis' total lack of respect or care of absolutely anyone else in her life, but, herself. END OF STORY!

 

[Imperious Me]

For those outside UK, here are some more pictures I didn't include in my last post about the patron sponsored Ch4 projects. In my last post I said 'the laziest people (SJ & Phi) that never lift a finger were dressed up in safety gear desperate to be on TV'. I have therefore titled some of these pictures 'All The Gear & No Idea'.

The episode & especially the last few pictures (with the yellow jacket) reveal they were willing to show their relationship. We know it was filmed last year before summer 2021 which means it was few months after Phi's arrival. So if they (SJ & Phi) had filmed this episode as a couple for Ch4 before summer 2021, why was she upset about it in November 2021 blaming Ch4? She said she wanted that part of her life to remain private. There's more proof, this episode was filmed when Gerry's apartment had just been started & the Dutch BF reveal happened few days after Ian had just completed Gerry's bathroom when it was leaking (Oct/Nov 2021). This means her Dutch BF reveal reaction was all an act to manipulate viewers & patrons to continue supporting her & funding her Ch4 projects. Projects are delayed for Ch4 & as SJ likes to prove comments made here wrong, I hope she proves me wrong & shows her patrons the progress of Gerry's & the Marquis apartments. She just invited the previous owners to view all the progress she's made as if they pay for it but patrons have to wait until after Ch4 has shown it.

June 2021 his hair was short AND she was wearing that naff yellow coat..

 

[T Rex]

I am guessing dumb Dan, Grant and Bag head....he FINALLY bagged...er, shagged Fanny....after pining for decades. She has to be desperate for some sex with a man by now.
Snorts ain't cutting the mustard. Or the mayo.

My guesses are: Jolly Ollie, Baghead Nick, and Potts.

 

[Iolair]

I'm Irish and roasting a new potato is sacrilegious to us. A good new potato should be simply steamed with some mint and served with sea salt and quality butter. A meal in itself.

Must be Kerry Gold Butter. Nothing but the best for Irish potatoes.

But are you aware, strange but true, that most Irish seed potatoes are grown Cyprus and imported into Ireland? Cyprus is the biggest producer of Irish potatoes.