The Chateau Diaries #153 She looked old as Christ's donkey, although she was dressed as a spring virgin

[Bleu Lala]

• Snorty says, ‘I’m a happy man’. I say, that’s debatable son!
• When I’m a 47 year old, I want a companion who has had some life experience, and who is cultured and knowledgeable and you can carry on an interesting, in depth conversation with – not a juvenile companion who: .
  • Can’t remember the name of his favourite Venetian restaurant
  • Doesn't know the name of his favourite wine
  • Eats the same spaghetti meal every time (that's what little boy's do)
  • Races the luggage trolley in the airport like a 10 year child with ADHD and ants in his pants
  • Is a kept playmate who isn’t in a position to pay for his own meal, let alone my meal
• What the heck was Fanny doing with that napkin and her bosom?
• "We should be making each part of the world we are part of beautiful for future generations"!!! WTF is Fanny smoking, because that sure isn't her mantra when it comes to Lie Lande???
• There may be fruit on her father’s walnut trees, but it's not the first time Fanny’s had fruit(s) while at Lie Lande.
• They need a smaller lake – so it’s a pond!!!
• £42.00 for an ugly, yellow loo brush???? I wonder what antiques and jewelry they actually purchased this trip and have squirreled away???

OMG! I was in Venice two weeks ago and saw that exact window display. I noticed the toilet brush because I am drawn to sparky and shiny things and it is very eye catching I told my husband “can you believe someone would pay $50 for a toilet brush? Some people have more money than sense!”

 

[Madame de Pompanddoodoo]

For a split second I had an awful moment when I thought they were going to eat in my favourite restaurant in Venice, luckily it was a false alarm I can breathe again. Try Osteria Alle Testiere if you are there.
And what’s the odds that yellow toilet brush will appear in the next vlog from the downstairs loo, bought by them or sent as a cadeau by a delusional fan.

 

[C'est moi]

Thank you @Lady Avonlea for posting the patron flog.
During lunch, @10:54, there is a women's reflection in the window, she is seated behind Stephanie Jarvis. I feel she is all of us. She is thinking WTF!!!
Of course, this is what she was looking at, with a pink phone attached to his hand and Stephanie Jarvis talking, non stop. I would have asked for a different table. Like the man at the far end of the restaurant, @13:20.

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Side note:
When you claim to be allergic to dairy and eat ice cream before a long trip, where was Philip Janssen, when the gas and diarrhea kicked in???

No no no! I think I would have got up, walked over and tipped a glass of whatever was available over her head. I would then have proceeded to tell her her life history and finished with a duck off out of here and stop ruining everyone elses lunch. I've never been particularly subtle and she needs it full on in her face. Arghhh!

 

[Iolair]

Venice i& the Lake (or Canals and Frogs)

Much appreciated Lady Avonlea. Thank you for sharing this.

Phi Phi's voice is decidedly more plummy in this vlog. So affected, so fake, and so tempting to push him into a canal. Notice too, how strange, that his nut allergy doesn't include coconuts. Now taking bets on how long it'll be before otter plushies turn up on cadeaux.

 

[KiKiGee]

Clean up on aisle nine.

Louise Hodgdon has established her YT account, TODAY but she a a long time fan and gift sender??? We see you, Philip Janssen.

Louise Hodgdon
Joined Jun 16, 2022

Louise Hodgdon
41 minutes ago
Dear Stephanie and friends, It was such a thrill for myself and my fashionista friends to see you unwrap my cat dress! I am 57 years old. I have always had an interest in fashion. You look absolutely perfect in the cat dress Stephanie and I think you styled it perfectly with your beautiful hair down gold and pearl earrings and sun glasses. You and Philip make a perfect couple with so much in common. I think you would make a perfect guicci model or sponsor “ kinda 70’s meets baroque” style. You both seem like exceptionally kind people and a positive influence to anyone who has the pleasure of associating with you.
Louise

 

[Princess and the Pea]

Ok so what did I tell you guys. If Stephanie is wearing the same dress five days in a row you can be sure she's skewing the timeline. Now we know she did it for this trip to Venezia. Did she really arrive back at HMN on the day of publications? Was she really only in Venice for 2 days? Where else were you? Milan? Vicenza? Verona? Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's raining. She's a con woman and that pet monkey she hold hands with needs to just shut up. "Thuh thuh-huh" that laugh - maddening.

I know Venice well, that Osteria is crap, complete tourist trap, (the menu was in two languages - dead giveaway), which I've regrettably fallen victim to. Buying artisanal cheese from a supermarket is a huge no-no - considering she was a mere 10min walk from the Rialto market where the good tit is she really shows here laziness, or ignorance. Phyllis eating the same food repeatedly as if he is a school child. I can't with these buffoons.

Yet again Fanny trying to make out that she is the 'know' with all the in places. I thought that restaurant looked like it was in a shopping centre & when you said it was Osteria I laughed my socks off. Of all the places in Venice to eat she had to go to a chain shopping centre eaterie. It's because she has to pander to the baby. OOh mummy I don't like the look of that place it's all dark inside and I don't know what that is on the menu...please mummy can we go to the place where I know what the food is, please mummy...
Yes of course baby & as a special treat if you are a good boy we will go into Maccy D's on the way home & maybe you will get a squirrel toy or something.
The patrons must surely be smelling a rat by now.
I watched one of the old gift grabs yesterday. I hope the cardiac nurse from Tasmania who said she had been a patron for a while & who wasted about £100 (plus postage) on sending Fanny some UGG slippers & a fancy artist's cup will have seen the error of her ways.
Maybe she is here. If she is then hopefully you'll be giving your cash to more worthy causes like the food banks that you help out in.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Judging by her skin and dirty yellow hair in the red dress photo she is already run ragged. I just can't imagine taking PhiPhi and introducing him to others at Tess's birthday party as my boyfriend. And it is not the age difference that is a problem for me (been there, done that), it is his unsophistication, his immaturity as a 25, his neediness, which I have the problem with. It is also his lack of financial stability and lack of employment. What the hell subject could he converse about at a party - hedgehogs, cutlery, second hand shops, china? Anyone with half a brain would turn away from him at that party.

Tess Hoffman has a toy doll she carries around.
Snorty is Fanny's version of a toy doll, but he's more irritating because you have to feed & listen to him.

 

[Summerbaby]

Personally, I think @Jules100 is a total witch for not leaking her humidity control haircare routine for Phyllis's sake. Someone needs to do an intervention. Annalise must be rotten to the core to let him wander around like that with frizzy hair and boot polish pressed into the scalp.

@Jules100 is not a witch, she is just very particular with whom she shares her haircare secrets, obviously not Snorty.
I generally admire men with longer hair BUT, it has to be in tip top condition and blunt cut. That goes for females too.
Although, men with awful conditioned, wispy hair do tend to gravitate to Lie Lie Land.
Speaking of hair, doesn't Stephanie Jarvis realise that she should have her roots touched up, every 4-6 weeks or so as her natural colour is rather dark?

 

[Clara Burnett]

Now I've eaten at that Osteria, it's not great, but if it's a traditional bolognese/ragu it'll have butter and a splash of milk to enrich the sauce. Phyllis's phantom allergy, likely IBS butt spew, must have caused some drama in the hotel plumbing. Now we're told that "chocolate" stain on his shirt was from the ice cream, I'm calling splash back from the loo.

I have eaten there too myself (although years ago and not by choice). It's for tourists and fine if you are with a big group and have to pay for all because of the prices elsewhere, where the food is much much better though and the ambiance more authentic. Like I said, this lunch was a huge finger towards the lady that kicked Stephanie out of her palazzo before for having too loud orgasms.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Clean up on aisle nine.

Louise Hodgdon has established her YT account, TODAY but she a a long time fan and gift sender??? We see you, Philip Janssen.

View attachment 1347166
Louise Hodgdon
Joined Jun 16, 2022
Louise Hodgdon
41 minutes ago
Dear Stephanie and friends, It was such a thrill for myself and my fashionista friends to see you unwrap my cat dress! I am 57 years old. I have always had an interest in fashion. You look absolutely perfect in the cat dress Stephanie and I think you styled it perfectly with your beautiful hair down gold and pearl earrings and sun glasses. You and Philip make a perfect couple with so much in common. I think you would make a perfect guicci model or sponsor “ kinda 70’s meets baroque” style. You both seem like exceptionally kind people and a positive influence to anyone who has the pleasure of associating with you.
Louise


View attachment 1347185View attachment 1347193

Trashy, tacky, skanky, cheap and horrid - applies to both Fanny and the outfit.

 

[Iolair]

You do know that once it takes hold you can never get rid of it... just saying.

Don't mind, love bamboo. Our new black bamboo is in the ground but still potted, which will help control the spread.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

@Jules100 is not a witch, she is just very particular with whom she shares her haircare secrets, obviously not Snorty.
I generally admire men with longer hair BUT, it has to be in tip top condition and blunt cut. That goes for females too.
Although, men with awful conditioned, wispy hair do tend to gravitate to Lie Lie Land.
Speaking of hair, doesn't Stephanie Jarvis realise that she should have her roots touched up, every 4-6 weeks or so as her natural colour is rather dark?

That goes for her botox treatments as well.

 

[Summerbaby]

Clean up on aisle nine.

Louise Hodgdon has established her YT account, TODAY but she a a long time fan and gift sender??? We see you, Philip Janssen.

View attachment 1347166
Louise Hodgdon
Joined Jun 16, 2022
Louise Hodgdon
41 minutes ago
Dear Stephanie and friends, It was such a thrill for myself and my fashionista friends to see you unwrap my cat dress! I am 57 years old. I have always had an interest in fashion. You look absolutely perfect in the cat dress Stephanie and I think you styled it perfectly with your beautiful hair down gold and pearl earrings and sun glasses. You and Philip make a perfect couple with so much in common. I think you would make a perfect guicci model or sponsor “ kinda 70’s meets baroque” style. You both seem like exceptionally kind people and a positive influence to anyone who has the pleasure of associating with you.
Louise


View attachment 1347185View attachment 1347193

Yet again, I have to question whether any of these individuals actually look in the mirror when/after purchasing these creations just because they have a designer label.
Emperor's new clothes always springs to my mind.
Just why do it to yourself?

 

[Lady Avonlea]

I thought exactly the same. The constant talk about a bloody pond (speaking loudly too) would have driven me crazy. I actually would have asked the restaurant staff to have a word with Stephanie Jarvis to shut it down as it was disturbing other patrons' enjoyment of their meal. Just no self awareness in her nonstop pursuit of chasing the MONEY!
I noticed the guy at the end moving tables too as he obviously didn't wish to be included in their filming - just so intrusive.

Very observant!!! I was listening in disbelief to Fanny yammer on about leaving the shiteau improved for future generations and didn't initially notice, so I went back and re-watched.

I'm sure that woman seated behind Fanny said to her husband, 'let's move to another table' and he's responded 'don't make a scene and try to ignore them'. She's definitely was not a happy camper.

The waiter brought the bill and Fanny just kept talking and filming....

 

[Trengilly]

I have eaten there too myself (although years ago and not by choice). It's for tourists and fine if you are with a big group and have to pay for all because of the prices elsewhere, where the food is much much better though and the ambiance more authentic. Like I said, this lunch was a huge finger towards the lady that kicked Stephanie out of her palazzo before for having too loud orgasms.

Well we know any noise coming from a bedroom with Phyllis inside is purely performative as Phyllis sure ain't making anyone cum anytime soon.

 

[Iolair]

I agree.
He is always either inappropriately dressed or, totally scruffy. AND, that stringy/straggly/very much in need of attention hair is absolutely awful - needs a good chop.

Completely agree.

As for needing a good chop, don't the French have guillotines?

 

[Summerbaby]

That goes for her botox treatments as well.

I agree.
She is obviously paying far too much attention to her forehead and not enough to her lower eye area - which is a total give away as to her actual real age. Methinks, that it is time to change salon provider Stephanie Jarvis for better advice.
Just for the record, I have absolutely no problem in anyone attempting to maintain/retain a youthful appearance BUT, there should be a balance.
OMG, she is looking more and more like Scotman with every passing day in that picture - especially nose-wise!

 

[KyBourbon]

Tattlers who are more knowledgeable than me about psychology please weigh-in. Sometimes I wonder if Michael has “Golden Child Syndrome?” Simply put, he was excessively praised and put on a pedestal as a child. Was told he was the best at anything he did… “the most creative, the most talented, the most musical, the most artistic, etc.” The parent has good intentions to build up the child’s confidence and self esteem, but, inevitably, he grows up and realizes he’s not actually the best. Expectations don’t match reality…it’s an eye opener for the golden child and can sometimes lead to mental breakdown.

 

[JackSpratt]

Hate to burst her 'i'm so far up my own arse' bubble but those Torelli biscuits you can buy in LIDLs when they have their Italian week.

 

[Jeeves]

Tattlers who are more knowledgeable than me about psychology please weigh-in. Sometimes I wonder if Michael has “Golden Child Syndrome?” Simply put, he was excessively praised and put on a pedestal as a child. Was told he was the best at anything he did… “the most creative, the most talented, the most musical, the most artistic, etc.” The parent has good intentions to build up the child’s confidence and self esteem, but, inevitably, he grows up and realizes he’s not actually the best. Expectations don’t match reality…it’s an eye opener for the golden child and can sometimes lead to mental breakdown.

I whole heartedly agree with you. I have seen this situation many times and it never ends well for the "child". No wonder he has to resort to buying this friendships and "relationships." Billy must be sick to the back teeth of his spoiled older brother.