The Chateau Diaries #145 SJ settled for PhiPhi the cock whisperer & spoon collector It must be true love!

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Does she have any idea how ridiculous she looks, or how green the fountain water is? Sick.
Makes one wonder how often that fountain water is changed. All the fuss about the espalier trees, the rosè bench, the lavender and the alliums, which are just another species of the garlic/onion family but as toxic as all hell to cats, dogs and birds, but hey, who cares about the animals you have when the plants look pretty and the guests have somewhere nice to sit... and when guests do sit there, they are greeted by the sickening, vomit inducing pond scum of la Lande.

Rather apt, one might say.
 
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My mum and dad were alcoholics when I was wee. My siblings and I were mentally and physically abused until they decided to clean their act up (years later)
They both remarried and my dad had gone on to foster kids and is now tea total. I’m 43 now, but when I see what he does for those kids, I get really upset and go back to feeling like a child again. I used to fantasise about having clean sheets and being tucked in at night.
It’s definitely something I need help with and it looks like Maria does too.
You my find Inner child therapy may be useful... there are exercises you can do yourself before you consider a therapist if you were to go down that path. If you were to ask your siblings their recall of a particular incident each of you will have a different memory of it, which may be useful in gaining a different perspective on outcomes. This obviously will not erase your own recall but may change some parts of it as they may have been different to what you remember... false memories.. All any of us want is to be loved and have caring people in our lives and there will have been some if no then then as you grew up. Whatever happened to you and your siblings was not because of anything you or they did. The parents created this situation and as a child you were helpless to flee it. Resentment although understandable will only continue the feeling of undeservedness and lack of affection, don't allow the past to ruin your future. xx

Why didn't they run workshops previously? And now guests are only there on the weekends for 2 nights. When you're only spending 2 days in the area who the hell wants to spend the time in a floral workshop with FRK putting weeds in a jam jar?
People would want to because its all part of the La Lande package... You tube creators and the characters within the content are a form of 'celebrity' so for a half day floral intuition, given there is nowhere else to go, I think a few guests would participate...
 
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For somebody who only ever so often sets foot outside her HMN for some real activity Stephanie Jarvis' assessment that it would take an hour to walk to Crozon sur Vauvre might be acceptable, but in reality it's not. Half an hour tops, maybe a tiny bit longer on return because of the hills. But of course Snorts and the Depressed Flower Smotherer were not walking, they were shopping for a place for her to set up shop soon. The buildings behind the church had potential, she said. She knows she needs to be in the proximity of Stephanie Jarvis to keep the grifting profitable and she also knows she can't stay at the shittoo without getting into a fight with either Snorts or the Bullying Argentinian. And another thing: obviously Stephanie Jarvis just had to show us how well her Snorting Cameltoe relates to the utterly successful florist-n0-not-florist-flower-designer and there are no hard feelings about making fun of her teeth. One should be able to call a horse's mouth a horse's mouth, right? To be honest, it is this kind of smoke and mirrors that winds me up as it is really taking a piss at not just them, but us too. Earlier this week I suggested that there are already big gaps in her new woodland garden, where the local wildlife comes to party in good fashion, following the example of the charlataine herself. In order to refute my statement she had to show how well the garden is doing, but she couldn't, so instead she used footage from before the damage. Her smoke and mirrors get pretty see through once you know where to look.


Because that's exactly what happened. They are planning for FRK to get a "studio" not in the shittoo but close enough to it. Best of both our worlds, they've called the plan. Not everybody is as enthusiastic about it, I must add.
If this is indeed the plan then all of this has the hand of Fanny all over it. Petherick encouraged to do his wallpaper gate vlog, gets more ££, cry me a river vlog, gets more ££. If it is the case that Marie is in cahoots with Fanny about this then it smacks again of her encouraging Marie to do the same. Double win. Fanny gets merit points Mother Teresa saviour that she is & Marie gets dosh to set up another failed enterprise. Hey let's encourage someone else like we did with Selmar. Even though we know that there isn't a hope in hell that Selmar could get a chateau or that Marie would make a successful business in the arse end of nowhere..it makes Fanny look good & after all that's the filter that she puts on her life to fool people isn't it. I don't know what to make of all this nonsense now.
 
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Agreed - the woodwork looks fabulous and Fanny wants to 'tart up' Amuary's craftsmanship and expensive wood with gold paint. It's a travesty and if I were Amuary I'd be royally pissed off.
In most cases, gold work on exposed panneling can look exquisite. There are five ways to achieve the look - a pencilled design with gold leaf, a pencilled design with gold paint, stencilling with paint, stencilling with gold wax, and rub-on furniture transfers. Who there at the HMN has the talent and artistic skills to pull off any of these options? No-one. We've seen the incredibly bad attempt Fanny made at painting the gold trim on her bedroom doors, so if she attempts the gold work on Amaury's panels, he won't just be royally pissed off, he'll throttle her!
 
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If this is indeed the plan then all of this has the hand of Fanny all over it. Petherick encouraged to do his wallpaper gate vlog, gets more ££, cry me a river vlog, gets more ££. If it is the case that Marie is in cahoots with Fanny about this then it smacks again of her encouraging Marie to do the same. Double win. Fanny gets merit points Mother Teresa saviour that she is & Marie gets dosh to set up another failed enterprise. Hey let's encourage someone else like we did with Selmar. Even though we know that there isn't a hope in hell that Selmar could get a chateau or that Marie would make a successful business in the arse end of nowhere..it makes Fanny look good & after all that's the filter that she puts on her life to fool people isn't it. I don't know what to make of all this nonsense now.
Nati, Dan, Philip and IJ need to come up with a similar stories of anguish and trauma that led to depression and thoughts of suicide to quickly reinvent their images now. Formula is tried and tested now - problems solved.
 
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Love the young lad in the background laughing at her! Fanny, you are making a complete fool of yourself in so many ways.

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As far as I know, that boy's face should have been blurred. In the EU, you can no longer show children or publish photos on any medium without consent.
For example, I have to sign a consent for every occasion when children will be photographed, for example in school activities, and the photo will be published somewhere.
 
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@Lady Avonlea, thank you for posting the Patreon video here.
A couple take aways:
-Why don’t they trim the yellow tubes in the courtyard?
-Cuban coffee with guests, 3:00pm and Stephanie is in her bathrobe.
I've just figured out the yellow tubes! It all makes sense now! I don't know why it didn't click before!

Dan has a septic tank bunker down there under the fountain, and the yellow tubes are feeding chutes, water supply ducts and air vents.
 
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I've just figured out the yellow tubes! It all makes sense now! I don't know why it didn't click before!

Dan has a septic tank bunker down there under the fountain, and the yellow tubes are feeding chutes, water supply ducts and air vents.
Better than my constant thought, Iolair, for some reason I always think of Snorts when I see those flaccid yellow tubes, and it's not a comforting thought!
 
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In most cases, gold work on exposed panneling can look exquisite. There are five ways to achieve the look - a pencilled design with gold leaf, a pencilled design with gold paint, stencilling with paint, stencilling with gold wax, and rub-on furniture transfers. Who there at the HMN has the talent and artistic skills to pull off any of these options? No-one. We've seen the incredibly bad attempt Fanny made at painting the gold trim on her bedroom doors, so if she attempts the gold work on Amaury's panels, he won't just be royally pissed off, he'll throttle her!
In the case of Fanny, she’ll apply gold to the paneling…and then fill any gaps with a yellow crayon! 😆
 
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In most cases, gold work on exposed panneling can look exquisite. There are five ways to achieve the look - a pencilled design with gold leaf, a pencilled design with gold paint, stencilling with paint, stencilling with gold wax, and rub-on furniture transfers. Who there at the HMN has the talent and artistic skills to pull off any of these options? No-one. We've seen the incredibly bad attempt Fanny made at painting the gold trim on her bedroom doors, so if she attempts the gold work on Amaury's panels, he won't just be royally pissed off, he'll throttle her!
Fanny can't even hang 2 strips of wallpaper without having to use a coloured pencil to fill in the gap.
 
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Not making fun of or dissing SJ for her appearance at all, it just blows my mind how one could age so much in two years.
For someone who doesn't do a lot of work, she sure looks really stressed out and knackered.
Shouldn't life, love, and laughter give people a more youthful glow?

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I'm pretty well convinced those freckles are fake. Applied with spritz of fake tan and allowed to darken because she believes freckles give her a more youthful glow. There's plenty of YouTube vlogs on fake freckle application. If they were real, and if she spent any real time outdoors, she'd have freckles on her arms, shoulders and cleavage too. She couldn't avoid it what with all the skimpy outfits she likes to wear - and I don't see her being careful enough, or thoughtful enough to wear sunscreen.
 
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