The Chateau Diaries #138 Stephanie Jarvis: How begging for $ while I’m rich saved my Vacays, oops chateau

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to my "Glam or Scram" review of Lalande's 2022 Easter Party!

First off, SJ, bedecked with gargantuan pieces of jewelry, wears a pale yellow-ish dress by South African designer, Spero Villioti originally made for someone who's now dead. Who knew that Stephanie Jarvis would show up at her own Easter party dressed as Miss Havisham. That dress is awful--it looks like an old and derelict wedding gown from 1992! She says she feels like a princess in her dress--but we say she looks like a giant yellow napa cabbage! SJ IS DEFINITELY SCRAM!

Meanwhile, Anna de Fleurie, shows up in a sophisticated magenta dress with a matching black belt and blazer, making her look like a million dollars! Her ensemble definitely makes her look classier than the overdressed host. ANNA'S UNQUESTIONABLY GLAM!

Simplicity is key. Annalise wears a simple but elegant navy blue dress paired with a lovely shawl. She's a sight to behold in that beautiful and glamorous dress. GLAM. (Dan, it's definitely your loss on this one!)

There's no question that Marie (de Larkin) is one of the more sophisticated dressed women at the party! She knows how to dress (and dress her age)! GLAM!

This gun-toting Dutch woman looks like she may have missed the memo, and looks a little confused. Is she in a country-western-themed party or Great Gatsby? Is she in 1922 or 1978? SCRAM.

Dubbed by SJ as the sexiest dress of the night, this glamazon can bully anyone she wants on Tinder's 50 and up category! She could wear this dress again to the next Women of the Streets Convention in Atlantic City. SCRAM.

Dana, the night's designated cook looks really dashing in her very simple but urbane dress. But being stuck in the kitchen slaving away all night, she must have smelt like sauteed something! Mason Dwinnell must have enjoyed taking whiffs of her olfactory jumble of fried garlic, olive oil, anchovies, fennel and black mold! GLAM.

Tess Hoffman shows up in a dress that looks like fake tattoos! Is she going through a Goth phase at age 40? Can someone who knows her actually suggest a good psychiatrist or at least a therapist for her to see? She may have missed out on all the fun in her teens and is now making up for lost time! SCRAM.

Tatinnette looks like, well, an old aunt.

Well, Yentas...til next the Lalande party!

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Yentas!
In the spirit of Easter (and Passover) I want to encourage you that...
no matter what life throws at you...
whatever curveball that may be...
no matter what challenge you need to face this year...
or whatever setback you may experience...
BE GRATEFUL
that you're not the one who has to wake up to this face every morning.

 

[Abuela]

On the buffet table for Easter Brunch where were the much talked about Easter Breads? Did they get forgotten in the new freezer ?

 

[Le Comte de Monte Cristo]

Omg...what did i just watch....an easter extravaganza...

The guests arrive...in the meantime Danas friend is trying to adevrtise and probably sell her juwelry...according to Fanny made with gold and precious stones...yeah right....i happen to know the price of gold and precious stones..

Madame is getting in her south african grifted/ payed for golden dress...pushing her tits up to high heaven...she looks like Barbara Cartland in her eighties..without the heavy make up..The whole party looks more like a swingermarket to me...trying to look sexy...not classy at all..i wonder what Anna from Honfleur thought about it all or even her Philip...My god..there are small children around

Who is that creep standing next to cheating Joost in the Kitchen..he looked like he just shitted his fancy pants...

Dana is cooking the dinner...Falafels everybody??? we didnt actually saw whats on the menu..

The easterhunt....offcourse Fanny found the big prize...we all knew that would happen...Larkin is texting her the places...omg..you couldnt make this up..

Kirsty is bringing sheep just for easter...wtf...i thought she had more sense than to drag animals there just for entertainment...horrible..

The lunch is served...a lott of booze and some streetfood...

Analise is there without the children...at the party...maybe it was more fun for the children to come the next day too for the easterhunt..

A eastermiracle has happened...the old cow has her eyesight back in the eye she was born blind with...what was that all about...didnt she had the change to go to a doctor in 80 years to look into her blind eye...that story rattles on all sides..But her grannies will suck it up no doubt..

 

[Jules100]

I really want to thank everyone for their support and encouragement with my “identical cousin’s” YouTube channel. It has been much harder than expected to actually put myself out there. But, it is fun too. I’m recording my next one today about the recent Easter Eggstravaganzas, I hope I don’t let you guys down!

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

This is the narrative she sells her fans!

Princess.

Fairy Tale.

Magical.

This is what she looks like to me.

 

[KiKiGee]

Artist Andie W. had an Easter IG post. I do believe she has a new career.

@andiewieringa
Happy Easter all of you! What a great day with a lot off sunshine. But let we think off all the people in Oekraïne and there losses of loveones. Pavlina it was a honner to make a livedrawing of you and to hear all your storys about your family and the war, it makes me realise that peace isn't easy. #easter #drawinyourstyle #drawingartinside #portret #blackandwhite #pen #fineliner

 

[Clara Burnett]

Hurra, Easter miracle! Mummy can see again on both eyes!!
Clara, have you ever heard of Mummy being blind on one eye? Funny, that she chose this moment to mention it....

She said it before, about the blindness in one eye. To my knowledge Isabelle Jarvis kept her eyedrops in the smeg fridge when at LaLande, those drops were to lower the pressure. My understanding was that she had glaucoma. Why would she use eyedrops when her eye was blind from birth? More bs from the charlataine, Easter miracle my ass. And to then make it even more "sacred" by choosing the chapel to bring this magnificent news...

 

[MRShavershamsdress]

I always thought of you as MRS Havershamsdress, not MR Shavershamsdress - now I have to change my whole view on you.

It was originally intended to be ironic as the name was chosen during a time when Tattlers were going on about Fanny’s wardrobe expense and I was still drinking the Koolaid. I was all geared up to be a flying monkey and she did something in a vlog (don’t remember what) which brought me up short before I could post. Whatever stunt she pulled made me think the denizens of Tattle Life might be onto something. After several months of lurking I decided to leave the screen name as is and start posting. The rest is gossipy history. And yes, I am most definitely a man. Occasionally a gentleman (Plantagenet bloodline for what little it’s worth) and just as a little reminder…where the hell are those bloody accounts Stephanie Jarvis you trollop?!?

 

[Clara Burnett]

Potty wasn’t there to do a bbq & Snorts is obviously incapable

I am still trying to find the real reason Potty wasn't there, because he usually does not miss an Easter party if he can help it, also because many of the friends that do come for Easter are his friends who he introduced to Stephanie Jarvis. My closest guess at the moment, lacking anything concrete, is that he can't be at the shittoo at the same time as Larkin and his family. Something happened between them last Christmas, there has been a huge disagreements of sorts and I don't think it is resolved yet. I've asked around, but the official reason for his absence is that he's too busy with the formula 1 stuff.

 

[missartemis]

I have to say that was hard to watch...I'll be brief. 31-minute vlog over half of it focused on herself and her house. Most of the rest was superficial cringeworthy content - how people looked, what kind of teacup she was drinking from, what people were wearing... Even when arranging the room for the girls it was about herself...."I loved bangles"..."the books I read as a child"...my toys...me me me. She invites longtime friends to a weekend and spends so little time talking to them, showing an interest in anything other than their clothes, and obsessing on how she looks, while her "guests" are cooking, clearing, setting tables, moving furniture, etc. Uhg. Glad that's over.

 

[Le Baiseur]

La Lacelle
Has anyone noticed the penis motif in the wrought iron before?

 

[OhIDontKnow...]

When my mum left my pa I saw her once a week. I was 10/11. I can very much tell you that it affected me massively, only recently realised how much. Maybe they're young enough to survive unscathed. Here's hoping.

My parents divorced right after I graduated high school and my brother had two years left. My dad made us go live with my mother who moved back home with her mother and had a nervous breakdown, (so he could take up with the woman he was having an affair with). That was 1200 miles away from where he lived. My grandmother was an alcoholic and would get drunk and argue with any and everyone. My mom hadn’t worked in 10 years and was unable to do so. So yeah, I was supposed to start college with that going on. I was a stellar student too. I’m talking top 4% in the whole US for my age according to my testing. No money. Didn’t know where I’d live. Had to live with an alcoholic crazy woman. Mom in tatters. Had to get a job. Got to go to state school because my aunt thought to put it in the divorce papers. My poor brother didn’t finish HS. Got his GED and finally went to school for computer technology and became a draftsman and 3-d modeler. I worked all through college and was broke as a church mouse. I was never able to go to therapy and probably really needed it. To this day I am pissed at my dad. He tries to say it was best for everyone. My mom never remarried but did work and in her last ten years working had a good job and a good retirement.

In my case, hell yeah stay together for the damn kids. They only had to wait a couple years. He caused it, my mom didn’t. She wasn’t “fun” enough. My brother and I were just at the start of our adult lives, and I figure they cost us at least ten years of catching up to where we just felt somewhat safe again. We had nothing at 16 & 18. No money, no car, no skills, no belongings. I get that it is the same for lots of people, but we had no warning. We thought life was going to be one way, and the next minute it was all ripped away. Plus our mom was a puddle of tears, and my grandmother hated his guts and let us know every time she got drunk. And all of this was the result of a choice, not a tragic accident. A choice. I’ll never truly forgive him. I don’t have the capacity. I also know that holding onto it only hurts me. I’ve even come to understand, but if you love your kids, you don’t do this to them when their future is at stake. Final note: neither of us had kids. I tried later in life, but it was too late. All of this is the reason I waited until I felt I could stand in my own if I had to. My brother has never married.

 

[Clara Burnett]

To me, this post from Marie is a sign she’s in the midst of recovering from narcissistic abuse. Feeling lost, lack of confidence, unhappy, unhealthy. It can take a long time to recover. I once had a therapist tell me sometimes it takes the same amount of time to recover from the effects of the narcissist as the person was exposed to the narc abuse. After my experience with a narc, I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again. In some ways I guess that’s good because now I can recognize the signals so I don’t let it repeat.

Marie says here’s to “new beginnings”…where have we heard that before? Michael Petherick. Let’s hope that Marie’s new beginning actually works out.

You could be right. Last thing I heard was that FRK asked Stephanie Jarvis if she could return to the HMN and pick up where she left off. Stephanie "gently" let her down, in a way only the charlataine can: "Oh, if only a return was possible, but unfortunately she made promises to other people...."

 

[Le Comte de Monte Cristo]

It must have been a costly affaire having 32 people over for the weekend...where did they all sleep...Lucky the weather was fine...as half her heap is a buildingsite...Imagine the washing up, cleaning and all that bedlinnen and towels after they all left...poor volunteers...

She had that parties before the pandemic...dont the grannies wonder how that poor and moneyless soul payed for all that in the past.. .

 

[The Simple Life]

Hello Tattlers, I hope you had all a lovely, peaceful Easter or Passover and could enjoy good company and food.
Congratualtions to @OhIDontKnow... for the great new thread too!
I didn't have much time, but tried to catch up with what has gone on watching the Great Easter Mad Bunny Ears Party and the last Grabeaux. The first just made me laugh. Smoke and mirrors at its best. My impression was that I've never seen a worst and more odd association of people. Most of them clashed with each other and many were there just to gain something out of it. When then I heard that the mean woman charged them for being there and eat her scraps of food, well, either you are desperate or you think you will get some benefits. Which other reason would one have?
I rather liked Dana's friend jewels, although they are not gold, but gilded bronze with semiprecious stones. They are actually inspired by, or rather copied from traditional Turkish jewellery, of which I myself have some pieces I bought in Turkey, where are not too expensive. You usually wear one piece at a time, given their impact. I must say that I suspect she actually imports them rather than making them, as I couldn't find any website or place where she displays anything.
I've seen that many here have said all there was to say about the party, so I won't add anything, if not a laugh at the Easter Miracle revealed in the chapel. The whole storytelling is so odd and yes, why should a very rich, former nurse wait for 80 years to have her bad eye fixed, if as it seems, it was perfectly possible to fix it?

About poor Jason Dubey, who never tires of making a fool of himslef worldwide, well, he DOES NOT sell actual works by Picasso, Dalì, Matisse, Chagall and the like, BUT JUST printed reproductions of their works. He's neither Sotheby's nor Christie's. On his website though, he's very careful not to say so. He's cheeky enough to state: "We are the only Gallery at Zalanta, Resort at the Village, featuring the works of Pablo Picasso, Joan Miro, Salvador Dali, Alexander Calder, Henri Matisse, Wassily Kandinsky and Marc Chagall." So, letting people believe he actually sells their works, worth milions of $$. In a gallery in the middle of nowhere... Ahahaha.

About the grabeaux, well, it was digusting enough, perhaps more than the usual. Some idiots sending tons of expensive chocolate, Indian shawls, crocheted chicks she then gave to the children (thanks God!) and other stuff. But what is more and more annoying and getting worst with time, is her hysterical laughter, her faked childish thrills and little cries at every item, her little girl way of talking and moving... soo sad and grotesque.
By the way, the Indian shawl she apparently didn't know anything about, is a traditional Kashmiri (the region, not the type of wool) shawl embroidered with "reel work", or chain stich. They are also called Jamawar shawls. Some of them are literally covered in embroidery and larger than hers. The one she received, if bought from India, would cost around $70 - 80. If handstiched, not machine stiched, more ebroidered and larger ones can cost even $600 - 700. If then the wool is cashemeare wool with hand stiched embroidery, it can go up to $1.500 - 2.000.
This last section on Indian shawls was only because I loved them! Hope you didn't mind my digression!

 

[KyBourbon]

I have to tread with care here as you know my objective not to talk about anything relating to Dan & Annalise breaking up their marriage, but what I can say without being to literal is that everything at the shittoo is always smoke and mirrors when Stephanie Jarvis is involved and nobody who considers him or herself part of that crowd has a genuine bone in their body. Generally speaking, if you feel the need to ask me a question like this, you probably know the answer already.

There’s been a lot of speculation about Dan and Annalise’s breakup (why it happened, what really happened, etc.), and we may never know the whole story. But, it does seem like Stephanie Jarvis’ has her grubby little hands involved in some way. I wouldn’t be surprised if she stuck her nose somewhere it shouldn’t have been. When Dan released his breakup video, Stephanie was so quick to release her own video about the matter…she almost came across as gleeful! With that video, she totally interjected herself in the situation when it’s none of her business. I agree with @Lady Rosalie that Dan may have gotten bad advice from Stephanie. Whatever advice SJ gives anyone should be taken with a HUGE grain of salt because, as a narcissist, she’s always looking out for her own interests first.

 

[Princess and the Pea]

Pretty sure Dan said on his vlog and he and Dana cooked together for Easter, so he did cook. Interesting Stephanie made it look like Dana was the cook and got the cred.

As well, the Easter Egg Hunt was divided into one area for the children and another for the adults, so SJ didn't steal the thunder for the kids finding the "secret" but the other adults, who I'm sure had all been told to not touch it if they found it before her, because you can bet she was the last one through the woods.

So why did we only get the footage of a shrieking with fake excitement middle aged woman 'finding' the secret chocolate shrine instead of that being something that 'adorable' children could've found & been filmed discovering with genuine excitement? That would've been much more appropriate for an Easter Egg hunt which is supposed to be for children after all - not grown ups. Stupid question, of course it was because Fanny had to be the star of the show - like a spoiled kid she had to be the big old winner.

 

[Clara Burnett]

Who said she paid for it?

Stephanie Jarvis usually charges her "friends" a considerable fee for their stay for the Easter weekend. Yes: you need to have an invitation to come, but you still have to pay.

Ian is away on his boat according to Stephanie

Different Ian. Welcome and our wiki is a great starting point!

 

[Clara Burnett]

That yard, though! I'm assuming it's his? It is atrocious! Whoever would think he's a gardener?? I mean, how hard would it be to just clean up that one area's flower beds? You know it must be all weeds, since it looks like he's using a string trimmer to cut it....although, since it's Dan, who even knows? I'm surprised he didn't use a blowtorch, since he uses all tools incorrectly!
Interesting to see him with protective equipment covering his face, though!
And I guess the placement of the Stihl equipment means he's fishing for a sponsorship?

I don't call someone that mows a lawn a gardener. I don't call someone who buys "topsoil" at the local quarry a gardener. Dan was never and will never be a gardener. All he is is a lost boy, pretending to be something he's not.