The Chateau Diaries #130 Stephanie Jarvis - Unscrupulous Grifting, Scheming, Knickerless Farmhouse Frauds

[Fennelbug]

This popped up on my YT, and I was intrigued by the title. (1) Sundays at the Brocante: Love at First Sight - YouTube

This vlog was posted on October 12, 2020 and Philip had only been at the shiteau about 1 month. It's interesting to watch in hindsight.

There's tremendous familiarity and banter between Snorty and Fanny with lots of laughing and some double entendre. They seem extremely comfortable with each other, especially for a new volunteer. Snorty is already very familiar with the decor in all the rooms and various decorative items Fanny already has.

Throughout the vlog Philip uses the royal 'we' quite often - we need this, we need that, and they even discuss having a picnic in the woods. They are already shopping together to find dishes to match Snorty's pattern that he left back in the Netherlands. Snorty is being extremely direct and taking charge of design decisions, including in Fanny's boudoir.

This vlog has the extension table, which Fanny pretends she didn't know extended - fawning over how wonderful Snorty is.

Snorty & Fanny definitely knew each other and had established a relationship before Snorty arrived at the shiteau. Snorty finishes by saying 'we were destined to be together' and he wasn't just referring to the card table. They were hiding in plain sight right from the start!

...

A gross slow burn. So gross. Just gross.

Grabeaux comments...



John
53 minutes ago
I’m so glad you are isolated in the middle of France. You are wisely working toward a self stuffiest future, harvesting your food and timber. Being geothermal helps. The solar arrays that you invasion will keep you energy indecent and not subject to a regional grid. God bless. We live in perilous times.

Nicole
1 hour ago
I would love to come and be the house cleaner. I would work for free just to be with you beautiful people.

Nicole is HIRED!!She just can’t be foxy in any way- must be uglier than Madame and Bullienda. Own (OUR) car is a plus.

 

[UvulaDonor]

But don't the business cards have those nobby nibbled gold edges? He certainly made much ado about nothing over them.

No really, Shrek doesn't know enough about the Dordogne to invest in anything but his chateau. You're right on the money, while he's not. I don't imagine for one moment that he is aware of the history, the demographics, or any aspect of tourism within his immediate area... unless it involves a brocante. The very first thing his family did upon arrival was criticise the local restaurants, so they are probably not going to help him out should he choose to invest in any foodie aspect of Dordogne. The same goes for suppliers as they'd have very close relationships with the resturanteurs. Wines - no, he's never indicated a decent knowledge of French wines, has he? In one of his vlogs the whole family criticised the local truffles they had purchased - which comes under the heading of 'how not to seriously piss off your neighbours'. So the only thing left is his arts and her crafts, and none if that is sustainable in the long term, especially not with the extremely high prices he's asking. The French are far too clever to pay for what he's offering. His business model is banking on international visitors with traffic driven by the fact that he's sat at the big kids table with SJ. It'd be interesting to see how M&M progresses... if I could ever be bothered.

I try to like them, but essentially I just find them boring to watch.

 

[Fennelbug]

But don't the business cards have those nobby nibbled gold edges? He certainly made much ado about nothing over them.

No really, Shrek doesn't know enough about the Dordogne to invest in anything but his chateau. You're right on the money, while he's not. I don't imagine for one moment that he is aware of the history, the demographics, or any aspect of tourism within his immediate area... unless it involves a brocante. The very first thing his family did upon arrival was criticise the local restaurants, so they are probably not going to help him out should he choose to invest in any foodie aspect of Dordogne. The same goes for suppliers as they'd have very close relationships with the resturanteurs. Wines - no, he's never indicated a decent knowledge of French wines, has he? In one of his vlogs the whole family criticised the local truffles they had purchased - which comes under the heading of 'how not to seriously piss off your neighbours'. So the only thing left is his arts and her crafts, and none if that is sustainable in the long term, especially not with the extremely high prices he's asking. The French are far too clever to pay for what he's offering. His business model is banking on international visitors with traffic driven by the fact that he's sat at the big kids table with SJ. It'd be interesting to see how M&M progresses... if I could ever be bothered.

Star Trek conventions better for them

 

[shatcho shiek]

lulublugirl, post: 8996153, member: 184108
How much!??? Bloody Hell! It’s almost making Selmar and Tatty’s daft circus proposal look plausible. ‍

absolutley correct @Fennelbug he has managed to con I THINK WAS a amature sweden chef into providing a meal service if required. Otherwise you get home cooked meals. The way its written is hard to decipher and not clear on what is actually being provided for and what is deemed as extra.

I believe into their are other events you can sign up for at 714 euros per day at a 7day art event you get DO actually get one glass of champagne at arrival, after traveling your own cost 6 or seven hours from paris . tit dont add up even if i used 3 painting screens per day and 1 full set of say water colours or acrylics their profit margin is through the roof for having to share a dunny.

 

[KiKiGee]

Marie Wiik received some advice...

Groovy 1970's
22 hours ago
How about getting a real job like most normal people. Then you will find out how tough real life is. Stop moaning for god sake!

 

[UK Phoenix]

This will make you LOL regarding volunteering.
I recently moved out into semi rural area. Thought that I would volunteer at a rather gorgeous local Stately Home run by English Heritage to occupy myself and to make new friends.
I have professional qualifications in landscape/garden and planting design plus garden history.
Anyways, after the rather long, drawn out induction process, I was offered the role of "Meet and Greet" which, as it transpired, is basically a car park attendant
Exactly what the HMN does with volunteers too regardless of their skills/qualifications, just using people as unpaid chamber maids, cooks or kitchen skivies.
It's the same, the world over, e.g. just unpaid labour under the guise of being something more - NOT!!!

 

[UvulaDonor]

There's several words for him and none of them pleasant.

And unsafe around little sick dogs.

 

[Gibbson]

Yes Dan said he’s spent hours on that pergola and training the espaliers.

Anyone fancy spending a week at Manor & Maker’s gaff, learning encaustic art techniques? 4 bedrooms available.
If some rooms are double occupied that’s 5,000 euro per room and not even a private loo! . At least I suppose they are ‘earning’ their own money!

Deux Terraces
Private terrace looking up to the woods and quaint cemetery, plus Juliette balcony looking out to the town. Private en-suite shower room with bidet. Shared toilet room.

Double occ: €2450
Single occ: €2760

Does one get a chamber pot? I would expect a gold encrusted ensuite for that price.

They're well up themselves after their foray into Venice.

 

[KiKiGee]

caroline gooder
1 hour ago
Stephanie stated she has organized a meeting with the manufacturer of the thermal heating system to find out why all the issues occurred. Per the Vlogs, from the buried chamber to more heating units in the rooms are being reviewed. All Chateaux are built for mostly summer living. Billy and his family don't live in the Chateau during the Winter. In fact they moved out so only future guests will live there during the season. Michael will be in the cottage permanently soon also.
caroline gooder
8 hours ago (edited)
Amaury is cutting the paneling now as they were too tall for the space, but the top and bottom details are being preserved. Ian had surgery, so the building on the apartments are on hold, till he heals. Please send him prayers and be patient.
caroline gooder
8 hours ago
He has said many times, that he is still enjoying working, driving the car for hire in the UK. When Isabelle and Percy visit, you know he does also. Stephanie just said that they are discussing his next visit
caroline gooder
17 hours ago
Ian had surgery so there is a delay. We must be patient.
caroline gooder
17 hours ago
Yes they said she is there and some other Ukrainians living in France will visit also.
caroline gooder
18 hours ago
Stephanie said Kat may come for a Easter visit

 

[KittCatt]

Madam & all her chateau & Ytube friends use this forum for content & to answer questions.
1. Visit to the bank - This is because the accounts & accountant has been mentioned here recently but she may have gone to the bank for something else (she thinks her patrons are stupid).
2. The chapel restorer - She said the lady who does the windows will soon put new ones. This might be to stop patrons from asking about it.
3. Sabine leaving - May be due to speculation here about her relationship with Dan (including showing pics of her in the pantry with him, fixing his mask & sitting with him in Venice. She may have shown she was leaving to stop the speculation.
4. Mention of gifts to Marie & Selmar - those couldn't have been the only gifts they received after they left (especially for Marie). They were mentioned because of the discussions about them here but SJ is not responsible for those 2 adults & the decisions they make. She may have used them but they used her too. How did they get their social media followers?
5. The party for Annalise at LL - Annalise's popularity on this forum & in vlog comments must have been noticed, that's why her party may have been shown for content & more views. I don't know why Annalise is popular she was hardly in LL vlogs & has always been a background character in the vlogs.
6. The use of multi skilled Dan for almost everything apart from gardening. She must have noticed Dan was popular on this forum & decided to show him more for views & content which has now affected Dan's popularity compared to just a few months ago.
7. The London wardrobe clear out & mention of labels & the charity shop was in response to some people on this forum doubting if all her labelled items were bought in charity shops as she claims.
8. Mary Lee's visit few months ago was in response to her being mentioned here about her laundry room blog entry.
9. Let's not forget the Dutch BF reveal & her rush to make a video statement after the Ch4 reveal & the kaboom thread on this forum. She mentions the 'hate site thread' which is made up of her previous/ current viewers & patrons.
10. Selmar's vlog absence for a week maybe due to his patreon vlog which led to the justice for Selmar on this forum. Although it's his fault because he (& frenchmaid) released the story & had been giving hints about it in vlog comments for weeks.
11. Curtis answered the archaeologist & Egyptologists questions on his vlog after doubts & questions about his qualifications were discussed here.
12. Billy in one of his vlogs directly answered a question that was asked on this forum. He said he bought his new project before finishing his old one (chateau) because the new one will bring in money faster & easier than the old one which is a never ending project.
13. One of the mistakes viewers have made is asking chateau owners if they would take in refugees, this has fed them with new content & vlog ideas for more donations, views etc & Madam has picked 3 because some people here asked why she picked just 1.

There are more but all the vlogger to forum responses can't be mentioned

On another note the Ch 4 filming. It looks like SJ begged her way back on the show because the others started filming since late January or early February & CDIY instagram has shows pictures & tags everyone else (on the show) except her for the past 2-3 months. Also I think CDIY took her back because she is not paid.

 

[Gibbson]

I agree. IMHO, I don’t think Dan has been doing the horizontal tango with Stephanmemememe. I think when he has his arms crossed when he is with Fanny, it reveals insecurity, apprehension, or wariness. Fanny loves to mock him and put him down, I don‘t think he is hot for her in that manner. He knows Fanny flirts with everyone, men and women, and wants to be thought of as perpetually youthful and desirable, so he plays along for the camera (Like MP did ).

I think Dan is under a lot of pressure because he knows he is now at Fanny’s mercy for his housing, pay, video content, and his party group. He has no choice but to do what she wants whenever she tells him to. Fanny loves feeling superior and in total control in all of her relationships, if possible. And she has no empathy or compassion for others, especially when it comes to her image and impression management tactics. His friend Sabine was most likely sent away by order of Fanny, showing Dan again that no one is indispensable at the Shittoo (unless you are a relative). So he plays up to Stephanmemememe’s ego by flirting with her, calling them a dream team, etc. He has no choice. No wonder he looks terrible. He is exhausted playing the Fanny game. He is getting the same haunted look about him as other former Shittoo occupants/employees/volunteers. And with phi phi going away for a few weeks for his play, Fanny needs another source of adoring attention.

I agree he's now Steph's wee goto boy.
Comment from her indoors on Cadeau at the Shittoo- My God, you can really see where Philip has sprayed on his hairline it is glaringly obvious.I bet it itches.
Mrs G showed sympathy after lockdown badger stripe covering- although I pointed out it was balding spray.
After which my hair was checked for bald patches.
A man just cannot win sometimes. You ladies have no idea of the strength it takes. I did say I would go full on Kojak( for those of you who don't know think Rock) if I started to go bald and it dropped off my head and onto my back.

View attachment 1143661
caroline gooder
1 hour ago
Stephanie stated she has organized a meeting with the manufacturer of the thermal heating system to find out why all the issues occurred. Per the Vlogs, from the buried chamber to more heating units in the rooms are being reviewed. All Chateaux are built for mostly summer living. Billy and his family don't live in the Chateau during the Winter. In fact they moved out so only future guests will live there during the season. Michael will be in the cottage permanently soon also.
caroline gooder
8 hours ago (edited)
Amaury is cutting the paneling now as they were too tall for the space, but the top and bottom details are being preserved. Ian had surgery, so the building on the apartments are on hold, till he heals. Please send him prayers and be patient.
caroline gooder
8 hours ago
He has said many times, that he is still enjoying working, driving the car for hire in the UK. When Isabelle and Percy visit, you know he does also. Stephanie just said that they are discussing his next visit
caroline gooder
17 hours ago
Ian had surgery so there is a delay. We must be patient.
caroline gooder
17 hours ago
Yes they said she is there and some other Ukrainians living in France will visit also.
caroline gooder
18 hours ago
Stephanie said Kat may come for a Easter visit

How far up Steph's backside does Caroline sniff?

 

[MojoDublin]

Marie Wiik received some advice...
Groovy 1970's
22 hours ago
How about getting a real job like most normal people. Then you will find out how tough real life is. Stop moaning for god sake!

The caption of the year

 

[OhIDontKnow...]

It would make more sense to give them an apartment being both IJ's and Pottys are self contained... not sure about Nicks... all 3 could live together, all speak the same language, they don't need to socialise with other house occupants if they choose not too. Was this news revealed in the gift grab? Is that why Sabine is moving on to make more space?

It’s not 2 more refugees coming. It’s two nearby refugee families coming to visit.

 

[Gibbson]

As for the big exciting utensil holder in the kitchen, I was so expecting them to wash the outside of the doorhandles or the inside where everybody’s hands touch, that has been filthy since the very first time it was shown on the blog, Doesn’t anybody notice all the dirty handprints on them would somebody please clean the doors and light switches?

It really is disgusting for a business premises. The Fleuries and The Originals (Dick and Angel) show them up on all fronts, garden, kitchen, bedrooms, outside rendering, roof, pantry, Loos that work, storage barns, renovation of outside buildings.
Lots to do Steph and if she concentrated on one good vlog a week, she may well get more done- not so sure on that last comment, I am probably suffering from self delusion there.
*Disclaimer * No Patron was consulted on the last statement, neither was Caroline whatshername.

I try to like them, but essentially I just find them boring to watch.

It's the flat monotone and the mediocrity of them. Elevation of the mundane business plan is the equivalent of giving everyone a medal for racing. Still if the munters want to buy into it - buyer beware and all that.

 

[Le Baiseur]

the idea of Nutti with a turbine on her head!

She is a hovering helicopter girlfriend, after all.

 

[Iolair]

I personally have always felt uncomfortable regarding Sabine as she never actually says ANYTHING. We know nothing about her, and she is just always lurking in the background like the Spectre at the Feast!
Has been at the HMN for way too long beyond other volunteers have ever been with no explanation as to why and TBH, what has she really contributed either? Never truly seen her being featured or doing anything. Plus, there are currently no B&B guests.
Kirsty could have used a second pair of hands on so many occasions - where was Sabine? I do know, hiding in Amaury's workshop gossiping!
The spectre at the feast. Someone or something that acts as a reminder of something negative and thus ruins the enjoyment of something. Primarily heard in UK. If someone or something is the spectre at the feast or the ghost at the feast, they make people feel uncomfortable because they remind them of an unhappy event or situation.

Yep, Sabine's gotta go. She's not part of the CD 'control group'.
Stephanie. Mummy. Daddy. Percy. Gerry. Natti. Marie. Amaury. Potty. Nicky. Emily... Sabine. Spot the difference. II'm pretty sure I saw an episode where Dan briefly became Danny lol. There's even Christies. Will Navlina becomes Navi? Kirsty doesn't count as she has a level head on her. But anyone else without the cutsie 'y' or 'i' appellation bestowed upon the by Stephanie had better watch out! They are expendible and even up until then, it's thin ice.

 

[Gibbson]

It’s imploding at a rate of knots!

All grasping idiots jumping on the back of 1 minute of fame to have Steph handling their goods. Philip got there first and Steph handles his goods, so they need to get over themselves!
It does make for entertaining reading though.

Yep, Sabine's gotta go. She's not part of the CD 'control group'.
Stephanie. Mummy. Daddy. Percy. Gerry. Natti. Marie. Amaury. Potty. Nicky. Emily... Sabine. Spot the difference. II'm pretty sure I saw an episode where Dan briefly became Danny lol. There's even Christies. Will Navlina becomes Navi? Kirsty doesn't count as she has a level head on her. But anyone else without the cutsie 'y' or 'i' appellation bestowed upon the by Stephanie had better watch out! They are expendible and even up until then, it's thin ice.

She probably names the kitchen equipment.
Dishy, Mikey, boily, cooky, broomy- the volunteer help don't know the difference

 

[Le Baiseur]

How far up Steph's backside does Caroline sniff?

Sometimes, when Stephanie laughs you can see the top of Caroline's head.

 

[chillijam]

That Caroline Gooder needs a hard reboot.
Very.
Hard.

 

[Gibbson]

and never buy the wife a Joni Mitchell cd in a square box and your lover a necklace in same shaped box, especially when the wife has already spied said necklace in your coat pocket.... I'm sounding like a broken record now but if you don't lie you don't have to remember anything... just be honest about everything....

We all learned that lesson. Same for women, don't buy your hubby and bit on the side the same aftershave or boxers. One might wear tighty whities and the other sport a nice line in Calvin Kleines. Dead giveaway if you got those mixed up.