The advice thread for random problems #7

[Former_Antelopee]

Id probably do something like book a holiday with it for both of you say I won some money booked us a trip and I've bought myself a handbag (or whatever you want to buy) to take away with me

 

[cowtastrophe]

Does your dog bark when your neighbours dogs bark? If not can you film your dog when the others are barking?

Yes, she does, but we don't let her continue, we immediately tell her no and she generally stops. It turns out next door have also had a complaint and they feel the same way. Their dogs do bark but it's definitely not constant and they don't let them carry on.

The ironic thing is that the complainer's son smokes weed in their garden which drifts across all our gardens and is really unpleasant so I asked them nicely to ask him to go the other end of the garden but he still does it. Perhaps I should complain about that again!

I really do sympathise when dogs are a constant noise nuisance but ours genuinely isn't.

 

[littlepup]

Just wondered what people would do about this....
A family memeber painted a nice picture for our first kid when they were born.
They are the sort of person that has an issue with everything. After a couple of issues the last few times we've met up at family gathering we don't talk anymore, a relief really after alot of unnecessary drama. One of the things they said was how my children's behaviour spoils their day. Both are neurodiverse, we have some challenges but nothing that I would say is massively out of the ordinary for any kids really.
I know they started a painting for my other kid but we've never been given it and I doubt we will now.
I don't know if I want to keep the first painting. It feels unfair on the second one and generally unfair on both of them to have it from someone who's been quite vocal about disliking us all. My husband says keep it because it's a nice painting but I don't know if my hearts in it.
What would you do in the same position?

If they were different then and it was given in love/kindness at the time (rather than some kind of manipulation/ showing off, great significance) then that’s what’s important to me, not the relationship now. Now it’s just a nice painting, the story doesn’t really matter.
I have gifts for ex boyfriends and estranged family because they’re just objects, nice ones i, they probably don’t even remember. A gift is simply that, “I like you, I’d like you to have this” in that moment. I can think of it fondly or with apathy even if the relationship is sour now because I can’t erase the good that was once there, if I did that I’d regret half the relationships and good memories in my life!

Regarding the younger child I can understand this is tricker but I’ve found the first get spoiled rotten and the second doesn’t get half as much. They won’t be equal in life, it’s impossible but the youngest will no doubt have things the oldest doesn’t have in future too, it’ll balance out.

If you can’t seperate the object from the person, which I would also understand, I like the idea of saving it and letting your child decide in future.

 

[RoseyThorney]

You’re all right. I’ll just send a generic mum and dad one and include my daughter in it as well. I sent my dad some pics of her yesterday and his response was just “great everyone looks good, keep warm and safe”. He doesn’t even ask about her.

Also realised in my OG post I said she’d said she was too old to be a grandma, I meant she said she was too young.

I don’t even want to ring them this Christmas Day because of how they acted last year but I know it’ll be an argument if I don’t. Might just say we’re heading out the door in 15 mins to keep it short and sweet.

 

[Carapop]

thank you, there's so much nonsense that has gone on but my friend is convinced it's all real and they're going to live happily ever after

It’s amazing how people can be manipulated. I had a case where a man who was a retired bank manager was trying to send thousands to a woman in Russia. We (the bank) were trying to insist that it was “romance fraud” and it would be negligent of us to facilitate. In the end he closed his account to take his banking elsewhere. Some people can’t be helped.

 

[Ray1403]

Does anyone had any ideas or advice for a cat who refuses to wear a collar?! My friend has had her cat for three years, but he’s always been kept inside so she didn’t have a collar on him. She’s now moved to a house with a garden and wants him to be free to roam more but only if he wears a collar. The little devil keeps breaking out of them!

we had an outdoor cat for 17 years and she never had a collar because of the risk of them getting stuck on branches etc while they’re climbing

 

[Serene Serena]

Do people do this?! I’ve got so many pairs of heels I have finally admitted I’ll never wear again - I must be sitting on a gold mine!

Apparently there’s a big market for worn shoes, socks and knickers. You have to be creative with your advert though, because eBay and Vinted don’t allow obvious sales to perverts. A friend from uni topped up her student loan by selling Primark knickers smeared with Vaseline on the gusset

 

[mani]

She's just read your post and says please tell your friend that a lot of healthcare in Romania is free, and funded by the state. Citizens are encouraged to get insurance. However, if this man can't afford insurance, he will still be looked after medically and wouldn't be charged for an ambulance - the cost of which would be about 400 euros, not the amount he's cited. If he is is need of medical treatment he will receive it, and not have to pay. He certainly wouldn't be arrested and sent to prison. He's a Billy Bullshitter, or as my friend says, a mincino.

Thank you so much, I knew it was suspect but your friend has really put my mind at rest so please do thank her

 

[littlepup]

What do I do?

I don’t think there’s much you can do in terms of getting rid of her unfortunately. Tbh I think putting the washing machine on at 7am is acceptable. The rest sounds really horrible to deal with, bad practice in those type of units but not “anti-social” enough to be an actual offence. As such, I’d look at ways to mitigate it from your side such as noise cancelling headphones, white noise any kind of soundproofing you can apply.
It’s unfair and you shouldn’t have to but untimatly it may be the way forward to make it more livable.

 

[bozlem3080]

If it helps I had a biopsy two weeks ago too and am also waiting. I was told I’d be sent a letter. It’s tricky, I keep checking the NHS app. If yours was part of the fast track thing it feels weird when it slows down, doesn’t it, after all the flurry, but no news and all that, not my first rodeo. They will have sent it. Sending the vibes.
(In praise of the NHS: I turned up stupid early each day, first a scan then a biopsy, and was seen stupid early each day too. Hardly got to open my book.)

Thank you, yes I keep checking my app also, the whole appointment was so rushed because it was 4pm & the nurse in front of me said the staff will be going home late tonight as they had packed away for the day & weren't made aware of my procedure, one of the tests were scrapped as they made the excuse they couldn't locate the equipment! I was made to feel guilty for having my treatment, I was given zero advice after the appointment ended either, part of me wants to make a complaint but then I think is it really worth it?

 

[NoHintOfDrama]

"Sorry" first response is made in a blind annoyance. Hence I don't believe you. No apology. You've been doing this for so long. You've described debilitating physical ailments with dates ending ability to use phone. You've described multiple personalities! At some point the zombies will be at your alleged door. Yet! Fortunately you remain housed. It is great to know you are safe, even when...

Glad it wasn’t just me who thought most of this was bullshit!

 

[owen2110]

Putting this behind a spoiler as it contains descriptions of a child in distress.

Spoiler: TW Child in distress

Last night, my husband and I stayed at a hotel. At around 00:40am, I heard loud crying, retching and coughing coming from another room on the corridor. I walked a little way down the corridor and established that the sounds were coming from a room a few doors away. As I got closer, it sounded like an older child or teenager who was crying, vomiting and generally distressed. I heard the child say something that sounded like “get off me”. It also sounded as though she was moving/running around the room while retching.

I was concerned by what I heard, so I told my husband and went to reception to ask them to carry out a welfare check. The receptionist told me that the occupants were a family of four (mum, dad and two children) staying across two rooms.

In the meantime, my husband knocked on the door to check that everything was okay. A girl answered the door who appeared to be approximately 14–16 years old and looked as though she had been crying. She said that she was just feeling “very ill”. My husband asked whether she needed anything, and she said no.

No adult came to the door or spoke to my husband from inside the room. Subsequently, a member of hotel reception went upstairs to check on the family, and everything was quiet afterwards.

I appreciate that there may be a completely innocent explanation for what we heard, but the combination of the child’s distress and what sounded like her saying “get off me” concerned me, and I felt it was better to pass the information on rather than ignore it.

Did i do the right thing? I’m such an overthinker and now i’m worrying thinking i shouldn’t have said anything but it just didn’t sit right. I guess i’d rather report it and it be nothing that not say anything at all? X

 

[Carapop]

just got off my holiday there. my shins didn’t tan AT ALL. i tried everything! suncream, water, tanning oil, tanning butter. i was short of rubbing myself in baby oil. everywhere else got a gorgeous color, including my feet and thighs. just not my fucking shins. anyone have any tips or tricks for my next holiday or even a reason why this happened?

 

[Snippysnips]

If you asked to meet up with a friend twice and she’s said shes busy both times and it’s been months apart would you just leave it for them to ask next if they do at all? We don’t live near each other and only meet up a few times a year.

Yeah, I'd just say that next time they could give you a date an time that suits them, that way your leaving it up to them an how they respond will give you your answer

 

[ReginaPhalange3]

I've never had an issue with Snapfish x

Looking to get some photos printed, I know there's a few online I can get them from, any recommendations of which ones that will do pretty good quality?

Don't want to use those machines up town like in boots or Asda etc cause the quality always comes out so crap

 

[Bread]

I don’t know if this is the right thread for it but I got dumped by my partner last week, quite brutally and he just packed all of his things and left. We were going through a really rough patch but I didn’t think but I didn’t see it coming. It’s been over a week but I’ve been feeling worse and worse each day, I know this will pass eventually but my god it is so painful. To think the person I love doesn’t want me anymore.

You poor sausage. I am so sorry to read this. Continue on this thread if you like, or start one of your own. It will pass but the only way for it to get easier is to work through it. Have you got some good people around you?

 

[JoeBloggs]

I think Ramsdens buy gold. Some jewellers probably do buy gold, sure Google would tell you

This is a jewellery trade supplier, their rates are usually pretty good. Even if you just use it as a guide - https://www.cooksongold.com/metalprices/.

This will give you the expected return for scrap - https://www.cooksongold.com/scrap/

 

[Snippysnips]

Tattlers, is this dress suitable for a wedding? We’ve been invited to the actual ceremony and it’s the week between christmas and new year. Everything in the shops is sparkly and I can’t find anything I love except for this one dress! I was however set on having a midi/maxi with it being winter. Is it acceptable?

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Been to a few weddings due to a huge family an honestly I see all types of dresses worn now both long an short so I'd say it's perfectly fine, just so long as it's not the same colour as the bridesmaids, but I'd also check the venue an see if you can fine out if it's going be warm enough as well, some venues I've been to are freezing so a short dress isn't the best

 

[Serene Serena]

Is out of date sudocreme ok to use if it smells and looks ok?

Yes. I think a lot of best use by dates are bollocks. I took some paracetamol (expiry date 2003) and my headache went and I’m still alive

 

[ReginaPhalange3]

I love my coffee machine. I spend a lot on coffees out, especially iced and during the first heatwave embarrassingly had 3 or 4 in a day I bought a machine that does everything and the joy it brings me, especially whilst my baby is cluster feeding has been worth every penny. It was my treat to myself for getting through the heatwave heavily pregnant or so that's how I justified it to Crapbag!

Question for you all? What have you bought that has enhanced or made your life easier? I have a budget of about €500 and want to buy myself something beneficial to me. I'm a busy working Mum of two autistic preteens. Life has been hard (think fighting for every little thing!) up until the last year of two but we seem to have come through it and finally we have a little extra cash for us.