The advice thread for random problems #7

[Carapop]

thank you, there's so much nonsense that has gone on but my friend is convinced it's all real and they're going to live happily ever after

It’s amazing how people can be manipulated. I had a case where a man who was a retired bank manager was trying to send thousands to a woman in Russia. We (the bank) were trying to insist that it was “romance fraud” and it would be negligent of us to facilitate. In the end he closed his account to take his banking elsewhere. Some people can’t be helped.

 

[Ray1403]

Does anyone had any ideas or advice for a cat who refuses to wear a collar?! My friend has had her cat for three years, but he’s always been kept inside so she didn’t have a collar on him. She’s now moved to a house with a garden and wants him to be free to roam more but only if he wears a collar. The little devil keeps breaking out of them!

we had an outdoor cat for 17 years and she never had a collar because of the risk of them getting stuck on branches etc while they’re climbing

 

[Serene Serena]

Do people do this?! I’ve got so many pairs of heels I have finally admitted I’ll never wear again - I must be sitting on a gold mine!

Apparently there’s a big market for worn shoes, socks and knickers. You have to be creative with your advert though, because eBay and Vinted don’t allow obvious sales to perverts. A friend from uni topped up her student loan by selling Primark knickers smeared with Vaseline on the gusset

 

[mani]

She's just read your post and says please tell your friend that a lot of healthcare in Romania is free, and funded by the state. Citizens are encouraged to get insurance. However, if this man can't afford insurance, he will still be looked after medically and wouldn't be charged for an ambulance - the cost of which would be about 400 euros, not the amount he's cited. If he is is need of medical treatment he will receive it, and not have to pay. He certainly wouldn't be arrested and sent to prison. He's a Billy Bullshitter, or as my friend says, a mincino.

Thank you so much, I knew it was suspect but your friend has really put my mind at rest so please do thank her

 

[littlepup]

What do I do?

I don’t think there’s much you can do in terms of getting rid of her unfortunately. Tbh I think putting the washing machine on at 7am is acceptable. The rest sounds really horrible to deal with, bad practice in those type of units but not “anti-social” enough to be an actual offence. As such, I’d look at ways to mitigate it from your side such as noise cancelling headphones, white noise any kind of soundproofing you can apply.
It’s unfair and you shouldn’t have to but untimatly it may be the way forward to make it more livable.

 

[bozlem3080]

If it helps I had a biopsy two weeks ago too and am also waiting. I was told I’d be sent a letter. It’s tricky, I keep checking the NHS app. If yours was part of the fast track thing it feels weird when it slows down, doesn’t it, after all the flurry, but no news and all that, not my first rodeo. They will have sent it. Sending the vibes.
(In praise of the NHS: I turned up stupid early each day, first a scan then a biopsy, and was seen stupid early each day too. Hardly got to open my book.)

Thank you, yes I keep checking my app also, the whole appointment was so rushed because it was 4pm & the nurse in front of me said the staff will be going home late tonight as they had packed away for the day & weren't made aware of my procedure, one of the tests were scrapped as they made the excuse they couldn't locate the equipment! I was made to feel guilty for having my treatment, I was given zero advice after the appointment ended either, part of me wants to make a complaint but then I think is it really worth it?

 

[NoHintOfDrama]

"Sorry" first response is made in a blind annoyance. Hence I don't believe you. No apology. You've been doing this for so long. You've described debilitating physical ailments with dates ending ability to use phone. You've described multiple personalities! At some point the zombies will be at your alleged door. Yet! Fortunately you remain housed. It is great to know you are safe, even when...

Glad it wasn’t just me who thought most of this was bullshit!

 

[Carapop]

just got off my holiday there. my shins didn’t tan AT ALL. i tried everything! suncream, water, tanning oil, tanning butter. i was short of rubbing myself in baby oil. everywhere else got a gorgeous color, including my feet and thighs. just not my fucking shins. anyone have any tips or tricks for my next holiday or even a reason why this happened?

 

[Snippysnips]

If you asked to meet up with a friend twice and she’s said shes busy both times and it’s been months apart would you just leave it for them to ask next if they do at all? We don’t live near each other and only meet up a few times a year.

Yeah, I'd just say that next time they could give you a date an time that suits them, that way your leaving it up to them an how they respond will give you your answer

 

[ReginaPhalange3]

I've never had an issue with Snapfish x

Looking to get some photos printed, I know there's a few online I can get them from, any recommendations of which ones that will do pretty good quality?

Don't want to use those machines up town like in boots or Asda etc cause the quality always comes out so crap

 

[Bread]

I don’t know if this is the right thread for it but I got dumped by my partner last week, quite brutally and he just packed all of his things and left. We were going through a really rough patch but I didn’t think but I didn’t see it coming. It’s been over a week but I’ve been feeling worse and worse each day, I know this will pass eventually but my god it is so painful. To think the person I love doesn’t want me anymore.

You poor sausage. I am so sorry to read this. Continue on this thread if you like, or start one of your own. It will pass but the only way for it to get easier is to work through it. Have you got some good people around you?

 

[JoeBloggs]

I think Ramsdens buy gold. Some jewellers probably do buy gold, sure Google would tell you

This is a jewellery trade supplier, their rates are usually pretty good. Even if you just use it as a guide - https://www.cooksongold.com/metalprices/.

This will give you the expected return for scrap - https://www.cooksongold.com/scrap/

 

[Snippysnips]

Tattlers, is this dress suitable for a wedding? We’ve been invited to the actual ceremony and it’s the week between christmas and new year. Everything in the shops is sparkly and I can’t find anything I love except for this one dress! I was however set on having a midi/maxi with it being winter. Is it acceptable?

View attachment 3768196View attachment 3768197

Been to a few weddings due to a huge family an honestly I see all types of dresses worn now both long an short so I'd say it's perfectly fine, just so long as it's not the same colour as the bridesmaids, but I'd also check the venue an see if you can fine out if it's going be warm enough as well, some venues I've been to are freezing so a short dress isn't the best

 

[ReginaPhalange3]

I love my coffee machine. I spend a lot on coffees out, especially iced and during the first heatwave embarrassingly had 3 or 4 in a day I bought a machine that does everything and the joy it brings me, especially whilst my baby is cluster feeding has been worth every penny. It was my treat to myself for getting through the heatwave heavily pregnant or so that's how I justified it to Crapbag!

Question for you all? What have you bought that has enhanced or made your life easier? I have a budget of about €500 and want to buy myself something beneficial to me. I'm a busy working Mum of two autistic preteens. Life has been hard (think fighting for every little thing!) up until the last year of two but we seem to have come through it and finally we have a little extra cash for us.

 

[cowtastrophe]

The thing that put me off the brooks is a lot saying they didn't last very long? Do you find this? Seen people say they used to be very good but recently the quality isn't as good as it was

I‘ve been buying Brooks running shoes for a good 15 years and always found them to be really long lasting. I think I’ve had my current pair for four years but admittedly I don’t use them for running, just gym. I have a very pronounced overpronation and they were the most supportive ones I could get.

 

[Ray1403]

A few weeks ago I was approached by my manager to apply for a job. This job has been mentioned lots of times to me in the sense of “if XX gets XX job then it’ll be yours when she leaves”. Well the person in question has got a new job now and her job went out to ad. I applied on the back of my manager telling me to and she said my application was just perfect. She kept referring to the job as mine and “when you’re in here and doing it” etc etc.

Fast forward 2-3 weeks and it turns out the job went out externally and had almost 200 applicants. I’ve today received an email confirming I’ve been shortlisted for an interview and I’ve asked for help from my manager. She called me to explain how big the interest was in the job and I’ve got to really impress if I want this job. It’s 2 bands higher than I’m currently on (NHS) and that the majority of applicants are only 1 band below (although I do the majority of that banding work, as I’ve been covering a role, it’s just not officially my banding). She also mentioned how some of the external applicants have come from really high up jobs.

Naturally, I don’t feel confident at all now. I told myself not to get my hopes up but it’s inevitable. I absolutely despise the role I’m in now and outgrew it a long time ago. I just know I’ll be gutted if I don’t get it and don’t know where to go from here. I feel like I’ve had a carrot dangled for a long time, and I don’t know what to say to my manager if I don’t get it as I’m currently doing way and above my specified job role/band/pay.

I’m also nervous as hell in interviews and panic on the spot.

sorry - just needed a little rant and if anyone can give me interview advice it would be much welcomed.

they likely advertised it externally as best practice, but your manager shouldn’t be getting your hopes up like that. unless she’s the hiring manager, it’s not her place to make that decision. as the poster above me has said, if you’re not happy, start looking elsewhere otherwise they’ll keep expecting you to do a job above your pay grade without any recognition. i hope the interview goes well!

 

[Serene Serena]

Struggling with a really negative colleague. We have the same manager, and I am in a more senior role than her but I do not directly line manage her. It's a busy time at work, 2 weeks out from our annual big event.

You'd think nobody has worked harder than her, more hours than her, or done more than her. Multiple times, our shared manager has remarked to me that she has been reluctant to take work on and that she is negative, and that we should find ways for me to be able to delegate work to her (as my workload is high). I said that she is often reluctant towards this as she's very aware that I do not line manage her. My boss' response was 'don't worry, she's got the same attitude with everyone'.

I tend to largely get on with my own work and ignore her moaning. We generally work well together, but she happened to snap at me in front of our shared manager today when I pointed out something to be changed in the final draft that I, fully admittedly, had put in. She said 'I need you to ensure everything you send me is clean because I am too busy for this'. I ignored it, because quite frankly, we're all busy and in a mad pre-event rush. My boss also said nothing.

But I just feel like this is a growing problem and I'm not quite sure how to address it. I've been assisting more and more of her work, which I am happy to do because I am in a more senior role and I am able to finish things quicker - both my side and also for my boss, who tends to have less rounds of feedback for me and trusts more of the process in my hands. Still... has anyone dealt with a colleague like this?

You need to request a 1:1 with your boss, and tell them exactly what you have written here. She sounds like she is taking the piss.

 

[Carapop]

 

[Carapop]

Can someone help me what to order for my takeaway?

The options are Wagamama’s

Pros- healthy(ish), cheap including delivery due to discount count code.

Haven’t had it in a while.

Cons- Sometimes feels a bit like one bite and it’s gone.

Local Chinese

Pros- I get three dishes for £15-ish including delivery due to discount code.

I won’t be able to eat it all so I’ll have some left over for tomorrow.

It’s Friday tomorrow so a takeaway is normal

Cons- I’m really hating my body/weight so I do want to be healthy eating so having two chineses in a row will make me feel crap!

I vote against anything which will make you feel crap

 

[Carapop]

I'm glad you guys said ignore it as I was 100% going to ignore it just wanted to see if others would to make myself feel better. It was crocs as well so not a small company so

Oh gosh unless it’s something handmade from a small business, I will GLADLY accept any free money a company want to throw my way especially if it’s somewhere from which I frequently buy. They make a lot of money from me