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Miss Pepperpot

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I live in a studio flat (kitchen, bathroom and main living room with pull down bed)
I own this property, been here years and have lived in flats previously so very used to having people living above.
Tenant above (also studio flat) moved in about 5/6 months ago and has been a nightmare from day one, lots of banging and crashing, slamming doors, very loud conversations, washing machine on early which is loud when it's directly above and numerous occasions of screaming and swearing once waking me in the early hours.
I contacted her landlord in the first month and explained, he apologised and said he'd speak to the agent who in turn said they would spk to the tenant. He also gave me the agents contact details.
Nothing changed so I rang the agents who were lovely and said they would contact her again, I thought at that point there was more than one person living there, they said only one on the tenancy but technically they could add another if needed, it wasn't a major issue.
They spoke to her and she claimed to have no idea what noises I was complaining about but I hoped things would settle.
They got worse.
I rang agent again this time speaking to the actual person in charge of said tenant, she was rude, kept interrupting me, insisted it wasn't unreasonable behaviour to have a washing machine on at 7am and that I had to expect to hear noise. Told me to ring police if I didn't like the screaming and swearing.
I explained several times I was well aware that noise was to be expected as was very used to having people above as I've lived here over 20 years but this is by far the worst tenant.
She basically told me new regs coming in meant it was harder to evict someone without either the landlord paying loads of money through a court and the only way to do it is if she breaks the tenancy by doing something serious such as trying to sell the flat.
Roll on several weeks and the screaming and shouting got worse, every few days, all different times, once three times in one day.
Her boyfriend was regularly staying so general noise was worse too.
And then the parents arrived.
And haven't left after six weeks.
They are definitely sleeping/staying there but I don't know if it's permanent or a long holiday.
She goes out to work but they are in the flat most of the day, really loud calls, bellowing over what sounds like facetime, I can also hear the tinnyness of the person they are speaking too.
I believe they are all Filipino or similar so can't understand what they are saying but they are loud!
One morning they woke me at 4am laughing and talking loudly, crashing around in their kitchen, the same at 6am the following day.
I literally get no peace on my days off. They wake me early every morning so I've had to start going to bed earlier to make up for never getting a lie in or chance to catch up on sleep.
On the plus side since they arrived she hasn't had a screaming/swearing incident.
They go to bed reasonably early.
On the negative they are noisy constantly when home.
I never get to relax on my days off or enjoy not having to get up early for work.
I'm exhausted and on edge constantly, I don't enjoy my own home anymore.
They have bellowed conversations in person and on the phone.
Play music loud.
Have visitors several times a week.
The dad is a smoker and goes out numerous times letting the main door slam every single time.
What do I do?
Am I wasting my breath complaining as they have already said it's hard to evict and clearly the agent isn't on my side?
Do I say she's got her parents staying in the hope she's broken her tenancy but risk looking a twat if it turns out they are just having a long holiday?
Do I just contact the landlord rather than the agent in the hope he will be more proactive although realistically he will just pass the info to the agents anyway?
Do I wait a few more weeks and see if the parents leave?
These places are not designed for multiple occupants, it's a squeeze even for a couple let alone three adults and potentially four when the boyfriend is there.
Sorry for such a long post!
Just to add selling/moving out isn't an option for me at the moment sadly.
 
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Whatthehell2

Active member
Question for you all? What have you bought that has enhanced or made your life easier? I have a budget of about €500 and want to buy myself something beneficial to me. I'm a busy working Mum of two autistic preteens. Life has been hard (think fighting for every little thing!) up until the last year of two but we seem to have come through it and finally we have a little extra cash for us.
 
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I’m really unsure about what Christmas card to send to my father from my 10 month old daughter. I’ve sent him dad cards from me and hubby for Father’s Day and his birthday and grandad ones from my daughter. His response to the last grandad card was “not sure about being a grandad”… 🙄 It’s a long story but he’s only met her once and doesn’t have a relationship with her. His wife - who I used to call mum but I have reverted back to calling her my stepmum - is really bitter that I’ve had a baby and she hasn’t (there’s 25 years difference between them) and both my parents had a horrible reaction to my pregnancy announcement. My dad has lost his spine when it comes to his wife it seems.

Anyway, back to the cards… do I just send him one saying grandad from my daughter and a parents one to them both from hubby and I? Will my stepmum kick off if she’s not included in the grandad card? I overheard her telling my wedding nanny that she “isn’t anything” to my daughter because she’s too old to be a grandma… despite being married to my father for almost 20 years. 🙄

Am I overthinking this? My parents are a huge source of trauma for me (I’ve done a lot of EMDR therapy) so I’m trying to protect myself from another Christmas argument (after they made me miss last year’s Christmas dinner with hubby and in-laws). Do I just wait to see what kind of card they send to us first and just reciprocate that?
Do you want to send them cards? If they are not interested in your child just send one from all of you as a family.
I obvs don’t know the whole story or family dinamics but I wonder if you need to give them cards.
It sounds like you need to cut them out of your life
 
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petitspois

VIP Member
You’re all right. I’ll just send a generic mum and dad one and include my daughter in it as well. I sent my dad some pics of her yesterday and his response was just “great everyone looks good, keep warm and safe”. He doesn’t even ask about her. 🙃🙃

Also realised in my OG post I said she’d said she was too old to be a grandma, I meant she said she was too young. 😂

I don’t even want to ring them this Christmas Day because of how they acted last year but I know it’ll be an argument if I don’t. 🙄 Might just say we’re heading out the door in 15 mins to keep it short and sweet.
I really think you need to pull back and put your own family first. They can sense they have a hold over you. Just be polite but do what’s best for your family.
 
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Padparadascha

VIP Member
So I told Mr Lolz about the whole win. I just felt too bad. Bless him he was so happy for me. But I swore him to secrecy and then gave him £2k.
I feel so much better. I could nevwr live a life of crime just keeping this “secret” was too stressfull 😂
I think i would be the same, I would love to stash some away for myself but weve always been so honest with money together it wouldnt feel right.

Enjoy your win, im jealously happy for you!!
 
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Serene Serena

VIP Member
Ooh, thank you! I'll keep it as brief as possible, basically friend has met a Romanian online and this person has had endless medical disasters (amongst many other things including being 'kidnapped' that all result in him desperately needing money) :rolleyes:

He's supposedly had huge medical bills (including £2500 for an ambulance in Bucharest!) and has done a runner 3 times from hospital as he doesn't have insurance. He's claiming he's been arrested and has been told he'll be going to prison for non payment. Please could you ask your friend if this sounds legit? I really don't think it is.. TIA 🙂
She's just read your post and says please tell your friend that a lot of healthcare in Romania is free, and funded by the state. Citizens are encouraged to get insurance. However, if this man can't afford insurance, he will still be looked after medically and wouldn't be charged for an ambulance - the cost of which would be about 400 euros, not the amount he's cited. If he is is need of medical treatment he will receive it, and not have to pay. He certainly wouldn't be arrested and sent to prison. He's a Billy Bullshitter, or as my friend says, a mincino.
 
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chickhicks86

VIP Member
Is it some kind of attention seeking disorder?
I think it's some sort of weaponised incompetence! I think the problems are genuine (after a fashion) but the advice given never seems to be taken onboard, and the woe is me continues. This poster has popped up many times over the thread with various similar problems, but there always seems to be an obstacle to why they can't follow anything through - device can't access relevant services, buildings inaccessible, everyone else's fault.....
 
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Melian

VIP Member
Hi everyone, I'm jumping in here because I need a bit of advice and I've nobody left to ask IRL. My friend got a labrador puppy back in October, we have been friends for 15 years. He had the dog about 3 months before he was told the dog was unable to continue living in his current accommodation. The landlord basically said the dog goes or they both go due to neighbours complaining about barking and his roommate was allergic to him. In January, he talked me into taking the dog. I find it very difficult to say no or put myself first because I am a people pleaser due to autism. I have struggled since day one. I thought I would manage because so many people say how amazing dogs are and how they couldn't be without them. I only heard positive things. I have tried and tried, spent hundreds of pounds on training but he is so energetic and I am so stressed. I cannot do anything, I can't sit down to have a meal, I can't read to my toddler, I can't play with my toddler, leaving the house is an army mission. I am shattered, stressed and really not enjoying this at all. He is now 11 months old, absolutely gorgeous but way too much work and I am not coping. I have had three heart attacks (I'm only 35) with the most recent in may this year and have been diagnosed with angina so the constant high blood pressure from the stress is making me ill. He has hurt my 2yo a couple of times stealing food from her and knocking her over, never intentional hurt but hurt all the same. It's got to the point where I have told my friend that I can't do it and he needs to be rehomed with someone who can give him everything he needs. I am too ill to manage this. Friend has gone ballistic, blocked me on everything and won't speak to me. He is angry with me for not coping and is furious that "his dog" needs to go. He can't take him back because of his circumstances so I have suggested a rescue which got me blocked.

Am I being a dick? I have tried for 6 months and all it's done is stress me out and upset me. I cry most days because I don't know what to do. I'm not a monster, just not a dog person and the kids are miserable too.

Anyone been in a similar situation?
What exactly does he expect you to do? You have a toddler. What if the dog goes for your toddler and seriously hurts them? A friend and her ex husband rehomed one of their dogs after she bit their toddler which I think is fair enough

If you're not happy, re-home the dog. It was a lot of responsibility especially with children to put on you
 
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Snippysnips

VIP Member
My uncle did this for my grandma, we went ahead without him. He was well aware of the date and we refused to move it for him.
My brother has also done this, it's my dad's 70th next month an he's booked a holiday. Am not moving shit, he knows when our dad's bday is an that its his 70th, he could have booked the holiday anytime an a 70th only happens once, so my dad's getting his day on his day
 
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cowtastrophe

VIP Member
I found out today from a colleague that our manager has described me as ‘pulling a fast one’ and ‘crafty’.

The back story is that I was originally employed on 18 hours p/w. I asked for this to be increased to 21 hours p/w following two members of our team leaving. Long story short, my increase was agreed but then we immediately changed teams so there was some dispute over who should pay for my whole three hours extra per week.My manager asked me to complete a flexible working agreement which I did and he signed off. It now seems he inadvertently signed off my increase in hours before it was authorised and his manager is annoyed with him. He is saying (not to me) that he didn’t know what he was signing and my extra three hours are preventing him recruiting another full time post in our department.

He’s off this week but I’m going to have a sit down with him next week. Cheeky fucker.
 
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Former_Antelopee

VIP Member
We complained and they agreed it isn't what we booked so going back later when someone higher up is in to get a different room 😊 the room looks totally different from the pictures also
 
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LaBlonde

VIP Member
They have the correct item I’ve returned but they also have a very expensive box of electrical bits belonging to my partner Royal Mail picked up in error as a return, it’s that very are refusing to return
i would be going for very in every avenue i could: tag them on twitter, instagram, get their ceo email address, just every possible way.

i know it’s not their fault that royal mail sent it to them but it’s your property (and it’s of significant value!) i googled and a few useful email addresses come up for their higher ups so i would email all of them. i hope you get it back!
 
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Snippysnips

VIP Member
I’m gonna try really hard not to doxx myself here…

Someone I know has been joking to a group of us about some wildlife cruelty they recently did. So cruel it ended the animal’s life. They seemed to think we’d all laugh and joke with them about it but very quickly started changing the story to say “for legal reasons” xyz happened and now they’re trying to say they were joking and it never happened after all. The thing is, they gave so many details that there’s no chance it didn’t happen.

Should I report it to the police? I want to remain anonymous so the animal welfare contact is not an option. I’m aware that a fine can be involved but also a prison sentence. I don’t think this person should get away with what they’ve done but I think the guilt of a potential prison sentence would weigh heavily on me.
Report it, if they were happy to joke about it then clearly they wouldn't care less doing it again
 
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Can someone help me what to order for my takeaway?

The options are Wagamama’s

Pros- healthy(ish), cheap including delivery due to discount count code.

Haven’t had it in a while.

Cons- Sometimes feels a bit like one bite and it’s gone.

Local Chinese

Pros- I get three dishes for £15-ish including delivery due to discount code.

I won’t be able to eat it all so I’ll have some left over for tomorrow.

It’s Friday tomorrow so a takeaway is normal

Cons- I’m really hating my body/weight so I do want to be healthy eating so having two chineses in a row will make me feel crap!
Maybe something to consider for the future, but the supermarket noodle + veg + sauce stir fry kits for £3 really are quite great, especially if you add your favourite protein (I love to add frozen prawns). It takes 5 minutes and is almost impossible to mess up.

It's these little healthy swaps that still satisfy your cravings that are the key - and each time chips away at that 'I feel crap in my body' feeling!
 
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Thank you all for taking the time to reply. I feel reassured by your comments, he really is a beautiful boy and I know how happy he will make someone. Labs need one to one attention and constant stimulation, which is something I didn't know before I got him. I didn't research properly as it was a last minute unexpected thing and I stupidly didn't realise how big he would get. I'm thinking from the dogs point of view too, he is loved and treated very well (2 walks per day, treats, cuddles etc) but I'm drained by the end of every day and he's bored, I feel guilty. I have made up my mind and will be going ahead with a local rescue by the end of the week if my friend doesn't take him back. He is trying to find an alternative owner in the local area so he can still see the dog, he sees him often which is another reason he's so angry about this. He is going to miss him but he isn't the one responsible, he just pops in for an hour whenever he is around and that's it, he just doesn't understand what it is like to be stressed out all day every day. Thank you for all your advice, it really helped.



Fuck him, he is not a friend. You are a kind, decent person who did your best. Put yourself, your health and your family before anything. He is completely selfish and deluded and I'm sure your dog will find another good home.
 
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cowtastrophe

VIP Member
I’m not a fan of feeding urban foxes. They can find their own food perfectly well and wild animals should not be made reliant on humans for their food. It also encourages rats.

There are a few areas where I work where there’s a huge problem of over-feeding - basically people fly-tipping unsuitable food saying ‘it’s for the birds and animals’. I’ve seen people dumping piles of cooked rice, whole loaves of bread, pasta, curry, mouldy pastry, left over meat and when you confront them, they honestly think they’re helping the wildlife. Mate, come down here at night and the only wildlife eating are hundreds of rats swarming the area.
 
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Bread

VIP Member
Any advice on how to stop a dog pissing on my lawn and driveway? Someone on the lane let's their dog walk way ahead of them and their dog at least once a day pees on the top of my driveway or on the lawn or the bark. Tonight, it's came right down the driveway and pissed on my front door so ive reached my limit. It's driving me insane as I have young ones who love helping me garden, yes theyre gloved 90% of the time but still. I've put vinegar down as read that can do the job but any advice is appreciated. Crapbag wont let me pull her, says its petty 🙄
Do you mean pull the owner up on it? Absolutely do so. Most people would be mortified if they twigged what their dog was doing. Just ask her to keep her dog off your land. You're perfectly entitled to.
 
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