The advice thread for random problems #6

[HoGi]

What would be a good gift for someone who's just gotten a new home? Can't really go plants due to their cats, it isn't a first home either so don't really want to get like home care stuff since they are really going have everything they need

Stuck on what to gift them

Nice blanket, decent candle, some nice bubble bath (if they have a bath) or just flowers and a card! Or a just eat voucher so they can try out the new takeaways.

I personally woukd hate a caddy of cleaning supplies as I am very particular about what cleaning products I use and I also am a bit of a hoarder so would end up shoving them in a cupboard

 

[didisaythatoutloudoops]

Nice blanket, decent candle, some nice bubble bath (if they have a bath) or just flowers and a card! Or a just eat voucher so they can try out the new takeaways.

I personally woukd hate a caddy of cleaning supplies as I am very particular about what cleaning products I use and I also am a bit of a hoarder so would end up shoving them in a cupboard

Oooh I'm with you on the JustEat voucher, that's a much smarter idea. Indeed, I did the basket for my daughter's new home - but of course I know the products she uses!

 

[Snippysnips]

Thanks, the just eat might be a nice idea since it's a new town, the cleaning stuff would have been ok I think if it were a first home but it's just a move so I feel like they will already have most if not all of that anyway, same with anything like towels or general household stuff

 

[Former_Antelopee]

I was gonna say a justeat voucher as when I moved into my house I had a few takeaways whilst getting everything sorted in the house. Couldn't be bothered to cook after sorting stuff out

 

[miss n thropy]

Here's a random thing.

Nice looking work shoes for conferences, office days, etc - something that balances a nice elegant style with comfort. I have the Clarks Pure Tone (below) in a load of colours but want something perhaps a bit more ballerina style, or even a small heel. Has anyone tried the Vivaia shoes? They look great but so expensive.

View attachment 3575399

Fitflop delicato Mary Janes are so comfy but they only come in chocolate and black x

 

[BearOnChair]

Is anyone trying to sell a house? Is the market just rubbish at the moment?
Been on 5 weeks, had 5 viewings in the first week and then nothing since.

 

[didisaythatoutloudoops]

Is anyone trying to sell a house? Is the market just rubbish at the moment?
Been on 5 weeks, had 5 viewings in the first week and then nothing since.

I think if your house is in the higher price range (not meaning overpriced, just meaning a house large enough to command a higher price, such as 4+ beds) then it is an awful market. With the economy how it is, people are trying to downsize more than anything (myself included).

I'm struggling to find 1/2 bedroom places but see plenty of 3/4/5 on the market.

 

[BearOnChair]

I think if your house is in the higher price range (not meaning overpriced, just meaning a house large enough to command a higher price, such as 4+ beds) then it is an awful market. With the economy how it is, people are trying to downsize more than anything (myself included).

I'm struggling to find 1/2 bedroom places but see plenty of 3/4/5 on the market.

Yeah it's a 4 bed larger than average.
Frustrating really as we need to move closer to work and schools.

 

[Snippysnips]

Anyone know who you can go to with disputing a banks credit card

So folks have a credit card, balance let's just say was for example £3,700, this was paid off fully last month so they cleared the entire amount, it was paid within enough time as well, however this month they have had interest added to it

Now with my own credit card if I pay off in full I get 0 interest, so we aren't sure why they are able to add interest to my folks bill, her balance was due 3rd may an balance was paid in full 22nd April, more than enough time before it was due

There was nothing stating there was interest to pay on her bill, so basically she paid what the balance was showing

Honestly seems like such a scam to me, like how are you supposed to know what your full balance is to pay if they refuse to add whatever interest onto it in the first place

 

[Mojojojo67]

Anyone know who you can go to with disputing a banks credit card

So folks have a credit card, balance let's just say was for example £3,700, this was paid off fully last month so they cleared the entire amount, it was paid within enough time as well, however this month they have had interest added to it

Now with my own credit card if I pay off in full I get 0 interest, so we aren't sure why they are able to add interest to my folks bill, her balance was due 3rd may an balance was paid in full 22nd April, more than enough time before it was due

There was nothing stating there was interest to pay on her bill, so basically she paid what the balance was showing

Honestly seems like such a scam to me, like how are you supposed to know what your full balance is to pay if they refuse to add whatever interest onto it in the first place

It wasn't for something like travel money was it - that's classed as a cash advance and interest would be calculated daily. I made this mistake last year but following a phone call to the bank they waived it.

 

[Snippysnips]

It wasn't for something like travel money was it - that's classed as a cash advance and interest would be calculated daily. I made this mistake last year but following a phone call to the bank they waived it.

No, it was a mix of purchases, we just can't work out why you'd get interested when it says on it that if you pay in full then you don't get that, that's also how mine works, if I pay it off in full within the time limit then I get 0 interest but the bank has put on almost £50 for them on a balance that was zeroed

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Anyone know who you can go to with disputing a banks credit card

So folks have a credit card, balance let's just say was for example £3,700, this was paid off fully last month so they cleared the entire amount, it was paid within enough time as well, however this month they have had interest added to it

Now with my own credit card if I pay off in full I get 0 interest, so we aren't sure why they are able to add interest to my folks bill, her balance was due 3rd may an balance was paid in full 22nd April, more than enough time before it was due

There was nothing stating there was interest to pay on her bill, so basically she paid what the balance was showing

Honestly seems like such a scam to me, like how are you supposed to know what your full balance is to pay if they refuse to add whatever interest onto it in the first place

You go direct to the credit card but I would question whether the dates she has is correct. Or it's purely a fault

 

[RandomFrog]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

 

[Former_Antelopee]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

I mean I'd never get anyone a anniversary gift unless it was my partner, I just think that's between the couple

 

[cowtastrophe]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

I‘m sorry that you’re feeling like that but tbh, I don’t know anyone who celebrates a wedding anniversary apart from the couple.

 

[petitspois]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

I think a lot of people think anniversaries are a private celebration for the couple. The lack of well wishes doesn’t mean people don’t care, it means most people don’t think it’s important to remember dates and occasions in the same way you do.

 

[MimiRogers]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

I couldn't tell you any of my families or friend's wedding anniversaries! It's hard enough to remember their birthday's even. Honestly, I really wouldn't take it to heart. I have never had a card etc from others for my anniversary and I would never expect one either. I think cos you are so good at being thoughtful it feels hurtful when you don't get the same back. But I heard a good piece of advice once...might help you...When you give out expecting the same in return but don't get it you will always be disappointed, you need to give out.. expecting nothing in return...you just either give it or don't!

 

[Darvos]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

As someone who has never sent an anniversary card to anyone apart from my spouse, I want to say that not being sent a card doesn’t mean people do not like you and wish you well. I’ll give a good wedding gift and do my best to help with the good vibes and anything else on the day, but it honestly doesn’t occur to me to put the date on my future years’ calendar or send a card. Mind you, I eloped, cannot remember the name of the town where we married without looking it up, and, a couple of years ago, forgot it was our 25th, so am pants with remembering stuff in general.

(If I know you and am one of the people who didn’t acknowledge your day, I’m really sorry. Bet I really like you but I won’t remember next year either.)

 

[littlepup]

It was a significant wedding anniversary for us a few weeks ago and hardly anybody sent us well wishes, by that I mean we had 100 guests at the wedding, we got 4 cards and that's it. I was so upset on the day, me and my husband had a little date night but honestly throughout the day I was just so down about it.

Since then one of my bridesmaids has sent an apology (one week later) and we received a card 8 days later from a close family member.

I feel so torn about how to deal with it, things like this affect me so much emotionally but then if I ever say anything to anyone about me being upset I'm always made out as if I'm being dramatic/told people have busy lives etc.

As a side note I remember every little thing about my nearest such as first cinema dates with kids etc never mind anniversaries and will always message! My husband tells me that's my issue...I make too much effort and get nothing back but I also find it hard not to, that's the way I am

I’ll wish people happy anniversary on Facebook if they post something about it but I’d never remember otherwise nor do I have the mental capacity to remember to buy and mail a card, that’s if I even knew the address or had the inclination to spend a fiver on doing so. I wouldn’t expect anyone to remember mine either, if we even celebrated it at all.

We’re made to ‘celebrate’ the in-laws and grandparents’s anniversary every year. That’s on top of Mother’s and Father’s Day, birthdays and Xmas and frankly, it’s all a bit much.

I think it’s wonderful that you’re so thoughtful, it sounds like it comes naturally to you but for others they’re just not that way, it’s nothing personal. I would be able to tell you for 100% how old I am without working it out!

 

[Snippysnips]

You go direct to the credit card but I would question whether the dates she has is correct. Or it's purely a fault

Thanks, we are going keep at it, she was definitely on enough time to pay it, she had till may an it was all paid in the April, we have tried to go into the bank a few times but every time we are there it's like over an hour's wait to be seen