The advice thread for random problems #5

[Kim Mild]

Looking for some advice, been on the mini pill for 3yrs, no problems up until earlier this year when I’ve started to get my period…..3 times a month, bleed for 5/6 days, finish for about the same time then start to bleed again, went to my GP did swabs/pregnancy test all negative, having awful pelvic, back, stomach & thigh pain too, pelvic pain always on the right side, told GP this, said was normal for my age mid 40’s although too young for menopause! No suggestion to change my pill or blood tests, I’m so tired all the time, moody etc….made yet another appointment but got to wait a month to see a nurse practitioner as no GP available, just feeling I’m not being listened to at all & my age is to blame!

Possibly fibroids? They should be ruling that out .

 

[klarakluckbag]

I love the Hyundai i10 or (my current car) i20. They go for miles in town on a teaspoon of petrol, you can park anywhere, and if you get a 1.2L model, you'll get up hills no problem...you won't be the fastest, but you'll be faster than a bus!
They're reliable, cheap and fun to drive. I had my i10 for almost 8 years and it never let me down, it was 15 years old when I got rid (steering issue which would have cost more than it was worth), I still miss it!

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

I'm getting married next year to my partner of 10 years, things are abit rough between us lately, fighting arguing over everything, I've caught him 4 times looking up other women and on pornhub in the last 2 months ,even though he said he'd stop ,it's like it's in one ear and out the other. We had a big argument last night and I was ready to end things with him, but I just felt pressure because we have the wedding date picked- save the dates out and I don't want to let anyone down and be an embarrassment,but I also don't want to be stuck in this relationship because he has no love towards me ,we have talked and discussed things and he always said he'd change and work is stressful, but nothing ever changes , I love him to bits but I don't know what I'm holding on to

Do you love him? Do you want to marry him? If the answer is NO to these then call off the wedding.
If the answer is yes then work on the relationship and maybe see if you can postpone the wedding.
Things like porn is often used when there is a lot of stress and uncertainty. Men are simple creatures for relieving stress.

 

[Sable]

I’d just be honest & say you’ve not really been ‘with it’ this week & apologise. If you want to go back that’s all you can do really ..

Thanks I appreciate it! I will try to contact them tomorrow and explain. Feel awful as it’s a local business salon and the hairdresser is so lovely.

 

[becca7721]

How on earth do they police that? Surely someone can say they are going to be travelling and lie to get the tablets?

Im sure people lie. If prepared people can get around the subtle questions asked to make sure they get the right ones. I know it’s not licensed from people asking and admitting it’s not for travel. Same for those who buy OTC at pharmacy for pets instead of going to a vet.

 

[Thank(space)you]

Not advice per se but has anyone tried that whole waking up at 5am thing?

 

[Mamacita]

I know someone who is up at 4:30 to be in the gym for 5. She goes to bed at 8. I just don't see the point??

I would rather go to bed at 10 and wake at 6 30

The only reason I can see is if someone prefers working out early or their gym is really busy otherwise so that's the time they can fit it in before work. But I'm the same, don't fancy going to bed at 8

 

[Pesky Tarian]

Ive not been well for a few days, now I've got a really sore, stiff neck and headache. Would you go to the pharmacy for this? GP have no appointments free.

In my experience the GP will just say take paracetamol, have warm baths. Do you have a wheat bag or something you can warm and rest on your neck?.

 

[TheGlossy]

So, not really problems, but more so what should I do pertaining to two similar situations.

1. A former flatmate I haven’t seen in 4 years reached out yesterday asking to go for coffee. We got along quite well until some girl moved in. She and I didn’t get along, so when she moved out, he almost blamed me for it. I ended up moving out too. I don’t have any animosity towards him. It’s water under the bridge. Should I meet him for coffee?

2. This senior person who moved on to a new role months ago, reached out out saying ‘Hope all is well. know if you ever want to catch-up’. Now, this person and I never had direct one to one catch-ups or calls before, but they were in my immediate network. I responded ‘I’d be great to catch-up some time. When would you be available’. Never got an answer. I’m sure they’re busy but it’s a bit weird.

What should I do on 1 and think of 2?

 

[Lalla]

Thanks everyone, I will suggest doing something else but I'm struggling to think of something else - we did bottomless brunch last year and afternoon tea the year before. I thought somewhere we could drink and play games might be fun but someone I know got into a massive fight at one of them recently which definitely puts me off going there. My son suggested some bar that's full of table tennis tables however this unlocked a childhood memory of how I hate table tennis
I need to think of something else - oh also it has to be daytime.
This is why I never do anything for my birthday as I can't make a decision.

 

[Kim Mild]

I really need to know what bra size I am, where is the best place to get fitted and has anyone done an online fitting before? Were you happy with the result?

Boob or Bust online calculator. They have a fb group too

 

[BearOnChair]

Definitely object now, the last thing people will want when looking to buy is a building site next door, our neighbours are having one done across the road from us an so far it's taken 2 months an still looks no where near done, it's also been a pain with the work vans parking all over the place, the noise an the mess, I certainly wouldn't be moving in next door if I knew that was going to happen, an people that are moving usually have a few options so keep objecting till it's sold an let the new buyers fight it out, the neighbors will just keep putting in more permission but hopefully you will be gone before it's accepted

Yeah, that's what I was thinking. A new owner of our house would possibly want to get work done here so its possibly something they could combine but I don't know if it's worth the risk.

 

[Snippysnips]

Yes, but on the buss you can also just tap your card. But again each person will need their own card. From experience I find tapping my bank card much easier than using a papercard. A papercard is so easily missplaced. If it’s two adults really consider each just using your own card

Thanks so much for this, I can use my own an my mum can use hers, it's really my dad thats the problem, he doesn't have a phone an refuses to get one an doesn't want to use card either, he's still a very cash only person so I'll maybe get him the paper card for himself

 

[Thank(space)you]

How does he know about your past?

He said he heard from people

I think I am gonna have to look around, my MOT and service isn't due for a month so I've got time

 

[littlepup]

yh i fully understand the importance of it and will go ahead with it. the only reason this is his first time visit to a dentist is because i have been trying to get him an appointment via nhs but unfortunatly no places near me had any availability and had long wait-lists, and i just found an appointment for him. but hopefully ill deal with the anxiousness going forward as his health is the most important thing.

Tooth decay can cause other health issues. I would imagine any potential affect on speech (which I thought was for younger kids but may be wrong) could be overcome whereas the decay could be dangerous in future.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Can anyone recommend me a decent, good looking coffee cup that fits in a car holder. One that doesn’t leak, keeps coffee hot, has an opening for drinking that’s not going to burn the mooth off you or dribble all over your white jersey - and most importantly, doesn’t smell funky after washing?!!

I have one from Sho. But I see they’re even better now. When I got mine you couldn’t close the lip you were drinking from. I’ve got a tumbler

Coffee Cups

Discover insulated, reusable coffee cups designed for both hot coffees and iced favourites. From spill-resistant lids to temperature-locking stainless steel, each cup keeps drinks just how you like them — with no compromise on performance or style.

shoreusable.com

 

[havee]

It’s hard. I don’t know what the milestone is but I have four kids, I’ve never gotten married and I’m not likely to do well career wise or own my own house, ever. I have no sporting achievements either! I’m sure you have great stuff you do that they can’t or won’t though.

honeslty I dont have any achievments and they are the ideal child my parent wanted to it hurts even more. but as the advice is easily given. but thank you fro replying and i am sure you also have achievements sending lots of love.
---

Just about every milestone comes with strings attached. A house? Mortgage payments for a property that may devalue, maintenance payments, tied down. Kids? Lack of freedom, life long commitment. Marriage? Expensive wedding, difficult to walk away from if it goes badly. Promotion? Additional responsibilities, feeling tied in etc…
I’m not saying any of these things are negative or shouldn’t be celebrated but look on the bright side of what you have that the other person doesn’t have. You can’t buy time, freedom or opportunity. Try to make the most of the positives in your own situation while you can and if it’s a life goal you really want to achieve, come up with a proactive plan of how you can work toward it.
Easier said than done of course but their success does not limit your potential.

yh thats true, it's just I have been compared to this person and their achievements/milestones and now they got thier next one so it feels like a stab in the heart and i cannot shake the feeling off.

 

[Snippysnips]

Hello all,

I am just looking for your opinions on this…

I am 34 and still in my childhood home with my mum. She’s a tad controlling sometimes but overall we get on so well, we watch all the same things and love each others company.

What are your opinions on people being at home in their 30s? I’ve been exploring moving out but in all honesty I don’t want to leave. My cat is here too and I couldn’t bear leaving her. Should I just suck it up and go though?

Am still stuck at home with my folks, personally I hate it but there's no way in hell am affording anywhere being on my own an even if I could afford rent the only ones I could don't allow pets which am not giving mine up (an are in shitty areas) I do have my own living room as the house is split with my folks living at the back an me at the front an I've got my own bathroom as well so it's not quite as bad as it could be but not having the freedom to decorate an make it feel more like "mine" is what I hate

But I do hate that society had made us feel like if you aren't out an have a family by mid 20s then there's something wrong, I know so many that felt pressured into leaving home young an now are stuck unable to move back home an can't afford the place they are in now with no way to get out, so I'd say as long as you are happy then stay where you are, housing prices an even rent now are a joke

 

[tomato_paste]

A random long shot

Does anyone own a Vauxhall Adam or a Toyota Aygo?

There's are the two I have my eye on, looking for pros/cons of them, are you happy with them, are they good cost wise, how are they with visibility vision (my last car was a Ford Ka convertible an when the roof was up it was incredible restricted seeing out the back) what are they like with hills? my work has a god awful corner hill going up to it

Also had my eye on the little VW beetles but they have discontinued those an I'd rather not have another discontinued car, just looking for something kinda small

I have an Aygo and if you're looking for a decent car I can recommend. It's not got the most PS (at least mine doesn't) and is pretty lame when it comes to hilly or steep roads, especially compared to my old Fiat Panda which, despite lower PS was a mountain goat tbh. If it has aircon and you're using it, it will pull power from the engine, so increasing your speed will be a bit harder. But it's very comfortable to drive, repair costs are pretty minimal. new tyres are also affordable. I drove it all the way to spain (2000 km each way) and it worked a treat, doesn't use too much petrol either.

 

[TheGlossy]

I need some advice as to whether I should raise this encounter as a complaint to the store manager:

I went to purchase a clothing item at a well-known store. The item was full price (not on sale). I got to the till and the sales associate processes my purchase. Literally the minute the card terminal read payment ‘approved’, the sales associate proceeds to say ‘You have 14 days for exchange only, no refund’.

I got really annoyed because I found it absolutely shady she didn’t mention the special refund policy before I’d paid for the item. She willingly concealed this information until the payment terminal approved the transaction. Additionally, nowhere at the till did they have a plaque stating the return policy.

In addition to her not being particularly pleasant, I found this type of practice rather shady.