The advice thread for random problems #5

[Kim Mild]

That's not strictly true, it depends on your other risk factors. BMI, smoker etc. did they say?
There are other avenues too, HRT or suppressants.
Have you looked at PMDD? It sounds more like that.

What is PMDD?

Premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD) is a very severe form of PMS. Find out about the symptoms and causes of PMDD.

www.mind.org.uk

Agree, it's approved up to 50 years old for contraception, if other factors permit. Back when we were teens , it was til about 35. There's also the mini pill which is sometimes suitable for those who can't take the combined

 

[becca7721]

It’s been a while since I worked for DWP so some of this information might be outdated but - if you live with your partner and they claim UC then you need to have a joint claim regardless of whether you are working or not. Any money you earn from your job will then be taken into consideration to then determine how much you and your partner will be paid in UC. You won’t be able to close your claim and your partner have a single claim as in the eyes of DWP, if you live with someone then any money coming into the household needs to be taken into account. You will only be able to close your claim if your partner is also closing their claim.

Like I say this may be outdated as I haven’t worked there for a few years but if you’re not getting any clarification from DWP then maybe try Citizens Advice just to double check the rules?

This is still the case - a joint claim if living together. That’ll be why the husband needs to attend as well. Joint claim or no claim for a couple. Even when one is severely ill.

My friend (severely ill) and her husband found this a year ago. He got a job and didn’t realise this rule that his wife couldn’t keep claiming as a single person. In the end he gave up his job (as couldn’t work enough hours to support them both) and now they’re in a much worse mess. There’s a set amount for a couple to live on and that’s expected to be reached, in their case by one person, who wasn’t able to do so.

 

[Snippysnips]

Not advice per se but has anyone tried that whole waking up at 5am thing?

Tried it, ending up starting to feel like I was forcing myself an was getting angry having to wake up at 5am, also felt like I couldn't enjoy my nights because I was so tired

Everyone's different an just because I was tired at night doesn't mean others will but it didn't work for me, in the end I just started to go to bed whenever I was tired an then just get up when I woke natural, I do have my alarm set for 9 (am fortunate I work afternoon evenings) but if am up before it then am up before it, some mornings can be 6/7 others 8/9, I find I wake easier an earlier in the summer months so I might get one of those sunlight lamps for winter

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Am staying at a place near regent square gardens in London, what's the best and/or easiest airport to use?

LNER have announced strikes an my trust has gone with this company, I've saved for too long an spent too much not to get down there, so looking at flying instead but I've never flown to London before an have 0 clue where the airports are an how far they are from regent square garden or how easy it will be

With the train I am due to arrive an depart from kings cross station, but now I don't know if I'll get down there in time or even at all

Fly into Heathrow or Gatwick. They have direct trains to london. The Heathrow express goes direct to Kings cross and the Gatwick express is about a 5 min walk from there.

 

[Clickbait]

Thank you, those are the exact ones that I was looking at. I also have a toddler and not much time to shop so might buy online and hope for the best.

So ordered the sandals and they’re great for the width but sadly way too long in my usual size. So if anyone reads the thread and likes them, my suggestion would be to go down a size.

 

[becca7721]

Do you think by the time you're 30+ and have more industry experience you can just put under 'education' on a CV something like "Spring field high school, 2005 - 2010 - GCSEs - All grades A-D" or does it need to be more specific? Then the name of the college, course and grade without any explanation of the content. It's not really relevant to the role, is anyone going to care if you got a B for history and a D for Art?

Depends on the job. I got asked at interview why I chose the subjects I did and got the grades I did.

I had the required professional degree to do the job but got turned down because I had no idea; in feedback I asked why and I was told because GCSEs were essential part of the criteria.

So yes it might matter.

Sorry if that doesn’t help.

 

[littlepup]

Update from the doctor.... she think it's a vitamin deficiency despite all the supplements so been advised to have a blood test in the first instance (although can't get an appointment until 28th May!). Have upped my vitamin D intake as of today. Potentially peri-menopausal but unlikely... although handily I did find out that as long as I have my womb removed during hysterectomy (which I plan to) I can take HRT without increasing my cancer risk further - good news!

Glad you’ve got a path forward.

 

[JoeBloggs]

I rent through a letting agency. There’s been a lot of work going on, drilling/hammering above my room so I asked if the agency could let me know when work was planned so I could arrange where possible to be out. It’s much louder than legally allowed without ear plugs/noise defenders.

I got the following reply

“Hi,
No work going on in that flat by us.
Regards
Agency”

My landlord owns the agency so it can’t be them either. It’s really noisy as the room I have is very high so it echoes an impossible to be in when it’s being done which it is at various hours of day and night. 3am yesterday!!

Have you popped up to have a chat with the people doing the work? If it’s happening at night it must be by the people living in it.

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

My youngest daughter came home last night, her boyfriend made her come to see me as she's been very low recently and tearful. She's on the mini pill (progestogen) and I'm wondering if that's not helping as it's unusual for her to be so teary and anxious. She said she feels like she's on the verge of a panic attack all the time.... just wondering how to help her

It might be worth a blood test too. Thyroid issues can present like that (as well as lots of other things too obviously).

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

yh ill call tomorrow morning, im fine with taking out the baby tooth but not sure about the decay one as that's the one that online said might cause speech problems, thank you
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yh thats what i am not sure about either, yh if it is the baby tooth then im fine with them taking it out. online ti says supposedly taking out any other teeth e..g the decay might cause speech problems.
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yh hopefully it is the baby tooth, im ok with that getting removed. thank you so much for easing my worries

Don’t listen to Dr Google. If you want get a second opinion from a different dentist. But healthy teeth are really important. Not just for over all health but also self confidence.
I know you are anxious but can anybody else take your child for regular checkups? Ideally at least once a year. This way any issues are caught early and dealt with.

 

[freshhead]

Trying to distance myself from people that I’ve outgrown. Not happening very easily. Any advice on how to politely remove myself from their lives without too many questions/accusations that I’m being ‘off’ with them?

 

[Former_Antelopee]

Yeah I do agree but some people re-home for reasons like we're moving so can't be bothered taking the pet or kids get bored with it etc. People should really have a good think about getting a pet in the first place, especially when they buy one from a breeder.
I know someone who got one type of pet, kids got bored with it in a couple weeks and they decided to get a puppy instead. Got one of the dangerous breeds which clearly wasnt good with small kids so rehomed the dog too after a few weeks. They shouldnt be allowed to get any more pets imo.

I genuinely don't know how people can have a pet and it being a 'loved family member' and then just get rid of it. I could never.

I know there are a lot of situations with difficult changes in circumstances and that's understandable.

I guess sometimes the best thing for the animal is rehoming it so isn't that showing love for the animal finding it a better more suitable home than keeping it just because you love it?

 

[Snippysnips]

You also have 3 years to start development from planning so it could be that and the previous owners secured the permission. Plus, if they started the work within 3 years but didn’t finish they’re still allowed to finish. No way of telling unless you speak to the planning department if there’s nothing online.

Thanks, I had done a search online an managed to find other houses, some dating back to 2019 with their plans but this one hasn't come up on anything, but could be it's a different type of plan an its just not online, am more just wanting to see what exactly they are doing now because it's got giant block pillars outside the door half way down the path

 

[TheGlossy]

Tbf you could've asked. I always asked before paying what the returns policy is. I seldom try on clothes as I hate shopping so often need to return things

I agree, I could have asked but usually, when it’s exchange only, stores have a plaque on the till advising customers of this. I’ve also bought items from this brand before and it was always full refund, hence the reason I did not ask.

 

[NoddyFromToytown]

Update from the doctor.... she think it's a vitamin deficiency despite all the supplements so been advised to have a blood test in the first instance (although can't get an appointment until 28th May!). Have upped my vitamin D intake as of today. Potentially peri-menopausal but unlikely... although handily I did find out that as long as I have my womb removed during hysterectomy (which I plan to) I can take HRT without increasing my cancer risk further - good news!

 

[avabella]

For those that have gotten tattoos, what is the best thing to use for pain? I have a seriously crappy pain tolerance an it's what's put me off for years, I want a really small one on my wrist but I've heard that's one of the worst places for it, so is there anything out there that will help?

Some artists will refuse to tattoo if you use numbing cream, and in an area like a wrist I wouldn't risk it to be honest. For all the time it will take you'll get through it, just have something to eat and pop an Ibuprofen an hour beforehand you'll be grand.

 

[Clickbait]

I've got a spot of gloss on my good black work trousers . They've been though the wash and it's still there (can only wash at 30). Any tips please .

Do you mean a lip gloss? If it’s oil based try putting some washing up liquid on it and if they’re colourfast I’d make a paste with washing up liquid and some vanish oxi powder, rub it into the stain, leave for 5 mins and then wash as normal. That’s my go to for shifting tricky stains.

 

[littlepup]

I had thought that as well, but we have had no notice, it just started one morning, we aren't right next door, but it's a small cul de sac we are in an we are very close to the house so I'd have assumed we were close enough to have been told

This is of course all assuming they did apply for planning permission an haven't just went an done the work which Tbh the type they are I wouldn't be surprised if they haven't sent requests for it being done

You can usually extend a certain amount under permitted development and won’t need planning.
When planning is applied for immmediate neighbours are informed. You can usually search planning applications on your local councils website.

Permission or not they can’t infringe on private property, litter, trespass, block drives etc, there are rules about what time they can start noisy work, burn rubbish etc. Contact your councils planning dept or environmental health for dust/noise with your concerns, they’ll tell you what’s permitted and what’s a breach.

If the construction company is large rather than a one man band you could contact their management regarding the worker’s behaviour too.

 

[bozlem3080]

I have been on contraception for 10 years. Works perfectly. For the past 6 months every 2 months or so I was spotting. Because it was longer than 2 cycles I went to gp who did a blood test etc all normal. They were then going to do swabs and go from there.

Luckily my health insurance has just kicked olin. Within a week I had an appointment and went to a gyno. Had an internal scan, everything fine and just my body getting too used the the contraception so need to switch or take a break. I do have a cyst but she showed me it's normal. Plus wouldn't cause any spotting.

You need an internal ultrasound. Make sure it's internal. You need to push. Likelihood is it's nothing but pain and bleeding should not be ignored.

Thank you, I will be pushing for some other tests, I’ve been finding random bruises as well & I don’t normally bruise very easily so may be anaemic going to get some iron tablets, I’m just so frustrated with it all, the periods I’m having are more than spotting, I’ve not taken my pill today I’m going to come off it, just dreading the heaviness of my next period along with the pain. I’ve been on the pill in the past for a long time when I was younger & never had this problem before, so either is my age or something else which needs sorting.

 

[Rodneytrotter]

It does sound hormone related. Are you finding similar feelings with anyone else? Is it every day or ebb and flow?

Is depression a possibility?

No he's just almost making my skin crawl. And I feel so awful for saying that. Yeah it could be depression I guess.