Scousebird blogs #15 Scouse Bird: The Joe Exotic of Merseyside

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Lies about Jeff; she is a consistent hands on mum, she has exceptional taste, she is a fantastic influencer, her shop is stacked full of desirable goods, she truly represents Scouse women. Anyone wanna compete? Hiya Jeff! 👋🏼
Her house is well decorated 😂
 
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Someone asked her what she was most looking forward to this summer and her answer was “dick”

Girl , you’re someone’s mother. Do you not stop and think for a second that impression people have of you is damaging for your child?
Your poor kid is in school. Other parents probably follow you and will be talking about you around their own children, before long the chats will be carried into the class room.
You seem to be revelling in having a bad rep? You’re pushing 40, it’s not sexy, it’s desperate and sad.

Does she not realise this is why she can’t find a decent fella???

acting like a slag isn’t empowering, it’s pathetic. You’re not Samantha Jones.
 
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Didn’t know ‘dick’ only came around in the summer

god she’s insufferable. bleeping woman

#wherescora
 
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I hope to god I’m not craving the D so desperately when I’m her age. And if I am, I promise I won’t put it on a ‘ask me a question’.
 
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A mother who’s 30+? acting like a teenager giggling at rude pictures and words
Grow up you ox
 
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Also, what a strange question that Ant and Dec or Jedward question was. How are they even compared to ask that question? Funny the way her answer resorted back to politics and made a drink driving dig at Ant. No connection between the pair whatsoever
 
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Well girls, it's National weekend! Let's celebrate by remembering the golden year of horse racing, when Jeff got "circle of sheeeowed" by the Daily Mail.
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she deffo asked herself those questions.
Also why is she always doing a stock check? She’s such a bullshitter no one stock checks that much! We know you have a shop Jeff by stock you mean counting all those soon to be out of date chocolate bars no one wants abd all the Easter shite you still have


Well done shirl 😍😍😍
"And there was SOOOOOO much stock to check" which basically proves ya never sell duck all ya lying, monster munch footed, piss yellow haired cackling witch.

How has she had her jab already?
I came to say this too. Either she's got some underlying condition or she's bullshitting.

"Dear Ms Johnson,
I can see from our file that you have several aggressive STDs at the same time, because of this FACT we see you as very HIGH risk of catching coronavirus seeing as though you've never actually had it regardless of what a test from Lithuania said, when you thought you had it it was merely after effects of getting the herp. Please get in touch ASAP for your jab, and make sure you keep your legs closed for your appointment as you have it in your arm not up your hoo-hoo and we really don't want to have to fumigate the whole clinic again.
Sincerely,
The NHS"

Omg those lips around that apple 🤢

The poor apple
Redrum had better decorum while eating an apple than she fuckin does.

Omg I'm howlin, when I wrote Redrum my autocorrect changed to rectum, how apt! 🤣🤣🤣

The one where she looks like she’s going to punch a horse because it lost
"Docker face, docker arms, docker attitude. Am ready for the races!"
 
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Earlier today I went to the market by mine and got these exact products for £3.50 and £2.50 each
Wtf is she on??
If she thinks I’m lying I’ll take photos of the prices next time I go
Just Jeff being a massive TORY
 
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