Why does she sound like she's about to cry in her latest story?
Ruby Granger #18 Still no deal with Waterstones but half her food was mailed from home
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I have big issues with Ruby's video:
1) She conflates introversion with not wanting to go to parties or social events at all, which I don't think is entirely correct.
2) She says that she's homesick every. single. day. whilst she's in Exeter after 3+ years of studying there. That's more than homesickness, that's definitely something more deeply rooted. Most people who are homesick don't have it 24/7, especially not in their later years of uni. By then, people are getting used to being an adult away from the family home, which she seems to never have got used to.
3) Does Ruby not want to have an independent life at all? And I don't mean 'independent' as in never speaking to your parents again or moving 1000s of miles away - just being able to do things without them, buy the cereal your parents disapprove of, stay up all night without being questioned, having a space that you have complete control over etc.
1) She conflates introversion with not wanting to go to parties or social events at all, which I don't think is entirely correct.
2) She says that she's homesick every. single. day. whilst she's in Exeter after 3+ years of studying there. That's more than homesickness, that's definitely something more deeply rooted. Most people who are homesick don't have it 24/7, especially not in their later years of uni. By then, people are getting used to being an adult away from the family home, which she seems to never have got used to.
3) Does Ruby not want to have an independent life at all? And I don't mean 'independent' as in never speaking to your parents again or moving 1000s of miles away - just being able to do things without them, buy the cereal your parents disapprove of, stay up all night without being questioned, having a space that you have complete control over etc.
Daddy bones just told her that no he can't drive her to uni everyday and wait in the carpark to bring her home after
I know it’s still OT and I hear what you’re saying. Of course someone can be a great teacher/tutor/etc and have an ED. At the same time, I think when said teacher/tutor is dangerously underweight, there is real physical risk of collapsing etc in front of children and I do think children and teenagers (and adults) are influenced by others’ bodies and having had anorexic teachers and nurses myself, I know it impacted me. But I get everyone is different and has different experiences and reactions.
This for me was where Ruby’s immaturity really shone through in this video - it’s as if she hasn’t yet developed past that point where it simply doesn’t occur to you that other people, including your parents, are independent beings with wants and needs that may not always be compatible with your own. Part of growing up is accepting that there does come a point where your parents are entitled to say ‘no’ and take time to meet their own needs. I’m not the biggest fan of the Granger parents (and I don’t think writing god-awful passive-aggressive poetry is the way to deal with this situation …) but it must be very, very hard to have a child like Ruby who is struggling so much at the point when she should be making those steps towards some kind of independence.
Oh I completely agree with you but I probably should have added the actual reach wasn’t factored into the mark (the lecturers only ever saw the front end and the content never the analytics) but yeah if she gets feedback from viewers etc that would be slightly unexpected for someone without her audience so I agree but it depends on exactly how it’s marked
As a first year student, it feels very odd to hear Ruby talk about her homesickness.
I also had a hard time adjusting at first; I cried a lot in my first week and it took me a few more weeks until I got really used to it.
But now, I don't really think about going home - especially not for longer periods of time. Sure, I still rely on my parents for advice sometimes (and I miss not having to think about groceries lol), but I wouldn't really want to live at home again.
How do you just let a situation like that happen for more than three years (both on Ruby's and on her parents' side)?
I also had a hard time adjusting at first; I cried a lot in my first week and it took me a few more weeks until I got really used to it.
But now, I don't really think about going home - especially not for longer periods of time. Sure, I still rely on my parents for advice sometimes (and I miss not having to think about groceries lol), but I wouldn't really want to live at home again.
How do you just let a situation like that happen for more than three years (both on Ruby's and on her parents' side)?
I went to a very posh private sixth form and the kids there would have eaten her alive just as much as in a state comp. Kids are kids and money doesn't change human nature!
To save me going back through all the threads lol how come she is in her 4th year at Uni? I assume English is a 3 year degree 
She started at Exeter reading Theology but then switched to English after her first year, and restarted her degree from year one. So she’s in her third (final) year of her English degree but it’s her fourth year at Exeter.To save me going back through all the threads lol how come she is in her 4th year at Uni? I assume English is a 3 year degree
i saw the video and read the title and thought it was a video of her discussing... her. was she finally gonna open up and talk about her? i was genuinely worried
Ah, thanks for the clarification cat cafe !
Hi, long time lurker here. As soon as I saw the title of the new video I came here ^^.
I just wanted to say that going to university for months at a time without going home is a very uk/us-centric thing. In my country (Belgium, which is admittedly much smaller than uk/us, so you're never more than 3h aways from home), litterally everyone goes back home on the week-end, it's just how it is. Very few students stay on campus during the week-end, and usually only with a reason (parents on holiday, party planned during the week-end, ...) I did it for 5 years (standard undergrad/grad combination time) and when I moved afterwards it wasn't particularly difficult.
I agree that Ruby seems unhealthily homesick, (since it's her fourth year), yet I feel like, for the first years, going away for the first time from your home for at least a few months at a time sounds incredibly hard.
I just wanted to say that going to university for months at a time without going home is a very uk/us-centric thing. In my country (Belgium, which is admittedly much smaller than uk/us, so you're never more than 3h aways from home), litterally everyone goes back home on the week-end, it's just how it is. Very few students stay on campus during the week-end, and usually only with a reason (parents on holiday, party planned during the week-end, ...) I did it for 5 years (standard undergrad/grad combination time) and when I moved afterwards it wasn't particularly difficult.
I agree that Ruby seems unhealthily homesick, (since it's her fourth year), yet I feel like, for the first years, going away for the first time from your home for at least a few months at a time sounds incredibly hard.
This video and the way Ruby approached it just made me realise she is actually following her dreams - that of becoming her very favourite emoji: 
Yeah same in France pretty much, at least in my experience. Only differences is that people only do this if their uni is not far from home obviously and also I've noticed it was only during the first two years mostly. At least that was the case in my group of friends, for some reason in our third year we started to go home far less often, probably because we were more matured I don't know. Also it wasn't really an issue socially, cause the biggest parties and social events are always on Thursday nights, and I think this is precisely why theyre not on fridays, because it's very common to go back home on the weekends over here.
I think her being so homesick is the natural result of her being home so much over the last year then suddenly went back to university. She got so used to being back in that environment where she was indulged all the time and her child behaviours weren't judged that she can't cope very being thrust back into university life away from the safety of her parents.
She needs to continue therapy
She needs to continue therapy
Her latest video is almost 22 mins long? What could she even have to say for 22 mins?
Yes ! all our biggest parties were always on a thursday, I even had a professor that hated lecturing on friday morning because it smelt like beer in the room! (jeudi CI is actually the motto of one of the student circles)
I'm watching her video rn and I find her view on parties very skewed (unless it's a culture thing, again). I'm introverted myself, and at first I didn't really like parties (because in my first living accommodations, the others were drunk every single night. Litterally. One like to brag that he drank such and such, when he had an appointment with his liver doctor at nine in the morning). But then I met a lot of my current friends, and most of our parties consisted of talking/joking/drinking (a lot but that's not the point, I've also had a lot if fun with them on nights I didn't wanna drink). I feel like the only version of a party that she knows of is going clubbing, which isn't really representative. But she's set her mind on it and doesn't want to change it.
Also, it's normal for her to want her 'me time' but socializing is an important part of uni, and spending all of your time alone isn't good for your ental healt (as I later learned, lol). Forcing myself to go to parties I thought I wouldn't enjoy, and actually enjoying myself, really helped a lot when I struggled, and I feel like she doesn't even want to try.
sorry if this is kind of rambly, but I recognize a lot of my younger self in what she says on parties/socializing, the only difference is I changed my mind pretty quickly, but she seems sets in her ways.
IT'S OKAY TO BE HOMESICK (basically)
Blah blah blah CANDLES something something OCTOBER! Blah blah blah CHRISTMAS yadda yadda yadda NORMALISE HOMESICKNESS! Blah blah blah ACTUALLY blah blah blah I MADE AN EXECUTIVE DECISION NOT TO SOCIALISE ramble ramble ramble AND THAT'S OKAY! Blah blah blah PEER PRESSURE yadda yadda yadda I WAS BULLIED! something something BLAKENEY!
At uni I never knew anyone to be homesick every day. If someone told me that I would be concerned for them, honestly.
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