My friends birthday tomorrow I will be sending her a Rach inspired post
I met you when you asked for my help in Tesco as you had spent your last fiver on crack.
I gave you my last penny as
I’m so kind.
I found out you were a raging alcoholic and had just come out of prison for fraud
.
I let you move into my house with all my kids even though you had a few convictions for GBH
I do so much for you even though you can’t get anything right without me, the way you Hoover my house is atrocious but oh how we laugh. Your cooking and make up skills are just as bad bless.
I remember the day you told me you have slept with half the men in your town. I didn’t judge and think 6 visits to the STI clinic is so lush.
On your birthday I know it’s more about me. You would still be in the gutter without me.
Once you’ve cleaned the house, picked the kids up from school, washed my car and made my tea we can eat the cake I got us. Guess who’s is who’s.