Pregnancy

[Definitelyme]

thank you for telling me all this my mum is so funny she says they didn’t even have tests with weeks when she had me so she has no clue I am just really nervous worries and now I understand why I am sooo tired I could sleep constantly x

It’s very normal to be nervous and anxious, although I know that doesn’t help stop those feelings. But I would imagine everyone on this thread would say they’ve felt the same in those first weeks, and even beyond. Pregnancy is a scary time. And yes, that first trimester tiredness is absolutely the worst tiredness ever.Bone aching exhaustion. Hopefully it passes for you soon.

Phew! I was going to make a list on my phone over the next few weeks then go to the supermarket and blitz their maternity pads and nappy sections will start my bag when I start my perineal massage at 35/40 - oh the glamour!!

I do the same (the blitz, not the massage, never could bring myself to, and in hindsight it may have helped me not rip bow to stern ) I just whizz round and grab all the mum bits and a pack of newborn nappies and throw it all in my bag with my all important snacks!

 

[Tui]

Feeling a bit rubbish this evening. My mom called and asked how I am, I said feeling a bit down what with feeling sick all day every day. I just feel a bit pathetic being this floored by pregnancy when I’m not even 6 weeks. And she said ‘well you wanted to be pregnant.’ And all this shit. Basically telling me off for feeling down.

Of course I want to be pregnant. I’m so so happy I’m pregnant, I feel so lucky. But surely I’m also allowed to feel a bit fed up with feeling sick all day every day so early in pregnancy. I feel like I have a long road ahead and it overwhelmed me a bit this evening. My moms never had morning sickness so she can hardly comment. Just feel a bit shit now. Won’t be telling her anything, I’ll just tell her I’m fine if she asks.

I think your mum probably has no idea how it feels. When you’re nauseous it doesn’t take long for you to be thoroughly fed up! First trimester is exhausting and so far it’s the worst I felt (30 weeks now)

 

[Definitelyme]

Have you tried wearing travel bands? That helped me first time round feeling sick

Are you all telling people names on your list?! I haven't even told many people.

Thanks for the suggestion Yes, tried travel bands in the past and they’ve never worked (also never stopped my travel sickness either!)

We don’t tend to discuss names much as everyone has an opinion (that we don’t care about ).

 

[Tui]

Do you think perineal massages help? I started them with my first at 30 weeks and ended up with a 3rd degree tear
Didn't bother with my second and it was only a small tear

Don’t know (FTM) but it sounds fun and can get the husband involved

 

[Stimpii]

You have less midwife appointments if you're having growth scans?
I've had growth scans with all 3 and my appointments with the midwife are the same

To be fair my midwife is awful. I really don’t like her.

I had an appt at 35 weeks and she wouldn’t measure my bump as she said it was ‘unnecessary contact’ When I go tomorrow I’m insisting she has a feel as I can’t tell what position baby is in and don’t wanna get to my 39 week scan and she’s turned again without me knowing.

 

[moimoi]

Oh bless you! You'll be fine! My MIL said to me that the baby hasn't read the baby books so do what you feel is right. It stayed with me and it helped! We are moving too, was meant to be in 11th Dec but bottom chain fell through on the day of exchange. So stressful. I hope you manage to find somewhere. These times are crazy.

I had my scan last weds. Have you?

Thank you! That’s good advice! My scan isn’t until the 30th due to Christmas. Very nervous but everything seemed fine at the first scan so

 

[Tui]

Hey everyone.

Been lurking on here for a few days, I had an ectopic back in January 2020. Found out I was pregnant just before Christmas and been having awful one sided pelvic pain just like I did with my ectopic minus the bleeding. Went for a early ultrasound today to confirm and I have a healthy 7week babies heartbeat beating away at me. I am so overwhelmed right now I can’t quite believe something positive has happened to me. I just thought I’d share my news here as I don’t want to share with family and friends just yet can’t believe it

Congratulations! That first scan showing everything is ok is magical isn’t it

 

[Definitelyme]

Right now the birth, I’m having panic attacks over it. I Don’t have a lot of support and I don’t feel ready. I’m under perinatal mental health care but don’t feel it’s been helping much.

Sending you lots of love. The idea of labour can be very scary, it’s so out of our control which makes it incredibly daunting. Nobody is ever ready for labour, even when I had done it before I wasn’t ready because it's such an unknown. Is there any sort of birth you think you would feel comfortable with? For example, would the control factor of having a c section allow you to feel less panicked? I think if that were the case, you'd have no trouble asking for one given that it is clearly having such a big impact on your mental health.

Can you ask your midwife for other options for help? If the perinatal mental health team aren’t working out for you, perhaps another route may be something that you could explore? I don’t have much knowledge in the area, but I definitely recommend discussing it more with your midwife and letting her know just how bad things are for you. You deserve to go to the end of your pregnancy with as little fear as possible. Although I know that you are close to due date and things move slowly at the best of times in the nhs, let alone during Covid and Christmas.

I am sorry to hear you don’t have much support, that must be very difficult when you feel so lost. Xx

 

[Easilyannoyed]

I would suggest if you do, waiting until around 7-8 weeks as before 7 weeks you can't always see a heartbeat

Are your periods regular at all?

So for the past 6 years I have taken no contraception my periods I do get them but the cycles are very long some of them have been over 50 days so I am quite confused as to how pregnant I am I was referred to fertility clinic and tests as soon as my period was due but for some reason I kept having really bad heart burn and being sick lost my appetite and my fiancé said to me last week he had a dream I was pregnant. Then for some odd reason I decided to do a test and I’ve done three now all positive I am still really shocked x

 

[Gem2212]

My 20 week NHS scan was brilliant, they have a tv on the wall so we could both see everything and she talked us through everything she was looking at. We were in for around 30 mins and got a couple of pictures to take home x

 

[MrsJones83]

I’ve got a name in mind that I absolutely love, but I need to convince my OH! We don’t discuss with anyone else, and nobody else will know until we announce their arrival. It means no-one can give their opinion, and everyone has lots of fun guessing! And although we know the gender, we don’t make a big deal out of telling everyone that either and definitely no gender reveal.

 

[MakeDamnSure]

Hi I’m 38+2. Due on Christmas Day! So scared lol

My first was born on Christmas Day! He will be 5 this year! It makes Christmas even more magical! Try not to be scared, you can do it! I’ve never felt such an amazing feeling as when I had just given birth!

 

[elloelloello]

Thank you everyone for all your love it means the world! I look forward to sharing this journey with such a lovely understanding group some light amongst this crazy, dark world we’re living in right now! Much love everyone


Aww thanks so much it’s been the most scariest couple of weeks. Please do update us tomorrow. I will be thinking of you. I am sure everything will be fine Will be lovely to share this journey with you. Much love

How lovely of you thank you so much! Agreed - nice to have someone to talk to! Will update tomorrow!

 

[Stimpii]

I found out both times. I’m so impatient, plus it’s more practical imo and I like to be prepared over surprised. We even paid for a private early gender scan second time. Knew I was having a boy straight away, saw his junk on the screen and called it before the lady even said anything.

We had a private gender scan this time as partners weren’t able to attend any scans.

My other half has always wanted a girl,
whereas I wasn’t bothered either way, but as this is our last baby I was glad he finally got a girl

 

[Macmama]

I have never done one before 37 weeks. I’m having a section this time so will probably do it the weekend before tbh.

Ive had three preemies, so by the last one, mine was pretty much packed after my 20 weeks scan Planned section will be a lot nicer for, well, planning!

 

[Pink Sparkle]

I thought I would join too Im 10 weeks with my first and have my 12 week scan on xmas eve
Had a private scan at 8 weeks with my partner which was lovely but we’re told he can’t come into the nhs 12 week scan.
Ive had sickness and tiredness so I havnt even thought about reading any books or buying any bits yet, and I feel terrible like I should be more organised
Also tried to buy a house my with partner as first time buyers but no mortgages available for us due to covid
Really enjoying this thread as I felt like I was left to just get on with it and didn’t have much communication so thank you ladies xx

Hi I’m 8 weeks and have been thinking of getting a private scan just before Christmas as were both off and thought it would be special. We’re also not allowed partners into the 12 week scan and can’t imagine not having hubby there. Do you think it was worth it? I will be just over 9 weeks. We feel it would be special to tell close family over Christmas if everything seems fine. Do people think that silly? I’m really in two minds and would love any advice X

 

[Definitelyme]

Current guidelines say that any woman can request a section and the NHS cannot refuse, as @WhatABore says. I know people who have had sections simply because they wanted them, not a signal birth. No “medical” reason needed.

Of course when you ask they will do what people call “trying to talk you out of it”, but they are obliged to make sure that every woman understands that c sections are major surgery etc etc.

 

[Stimpii]

I agree! I have about 20 girls names that I love and only one boys name, and my partner doesn’t like it.. but it’s fine I have 8 months of graft just in case I have a boy

I suggested a name for my first boy and partner hated it. 4 years later I didn’t even suggest it again as knew he didn’t like it, then he suggested it. To be honest the younger one deff suits the name more so worked out quite well.

 

[Stimpii]

Oh wow. What was their reason for offering induction?

They don’t want me to go overdue by much as baby changed position a few weeks back.

If they’d warned me at the last appt it might be offered I wouldn’t have been as shocked. I did have a stretch and sweep tho. Really hoping I go into labour naturally in the next week.

I had my 36 week midwife appointment and baby is breech. Has anyone been breech at this stage and baby has naturally turned? Or has any other experience of this to share? Thanks

My baby was oblique at my 36 week growth scan. I had a successful ecv and she’s stayed head down since.

Did they mention turning the baby for you?

 

[moimoi]

Is this your first? This is my second. Feels like its going so quick! Especially because I haven't seen anyone so when I tell people they can't believe how far gone I am my 3 year old keeps me busy too!


Is this your first? This is my second. Feels like its going so quick! Especially because I haven't seen anyone so when I tell people they can't believe how far gone I am my 3 year old keeps me busy too

Quoted that completely wrong @moimoi

It is my first! And I know how you feel, feels only 5 mins ago that I found out at 5 weeks. Terrified as no idea what I’m doing and busy stressing about finding a new place to live by Feb! Have you had your 20 week scan?