Pregnancy #64

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I got obliterated the week before finding out about #1 😂 most would say she turned out ok… I sometimes wonder but think it’s her dads genes lol
 
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Aw thanks for reassuring me as I’m feeling pretty tit today. My mum just told me she drank for ages before she knew she was pregnant with me and I turned out ok. I’m not condoning my actions here obviously. It does seem to be getting stronger but I’m so afraid of a chemical
Congrats! I had 4 glasses of Prosecco the day before I found out I was pregnant, and am lying next to my very healthy and strong almost 2 year old. You’ll be fine :)
 
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Congrats! I had 4 glasses of Prosecco the day before I found out I was pregnant, and am lying next to my very healthy and strong almost 2 year old. You’ll be fine :)
I remember us both stressing about this at the time - I had just done a long run and celebrated with a bottle of wine and a steak so rare a good vet could have got it back up and mooing!
 
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I remember us both stressing about this at the time - I had just done a long run and celebrated with a bottle of wine and a steak so rare a good vet could have got it back up and mooing!
Yes! I’m still making up for not having rare steak for 9 months 😂
 
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Ah thank you everyone 😢 I’m very upset about it. I’m getting married next June and would have so loved a baby before hand as I’m pushing 36. I had a miscarriage in December and just don’t seem to have any luck
 
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Ah thank you everyone 😢 I’m very upset about it. I’m getting married next June and would have so loved a baby before hand as I’m pushing 36. I had a miscarriage in December and just don’t seem to have any luck
im so sorry for your loss, please know it wasn’t your fault. If you haven’t already, please reach out to the GP and ask for a referral to the recurrent miscarriage clinic - they used to only see you after three, but it’s now dropped to two.
my mum had me at 38 and I turned out fine, lots of women are having babies into their 40s now - I’m sure there’s a few of us on this thread that are older mums.
 
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im so sorry for your loss, please know it wasn’t your fault. If you haven’t already, please reach out to the GP and ask for a referral to the recurrent miscarriage clinic - they used to only see you after three, but it’s now dropped to two.
my mum had me at 38 and I turned out fine, lots of women are having babies into their 40s now - I’m sure there’s a few of us on this thread that are older mums.
Yep - I didn’t start trying until I was late 30s, will be 41 by the time bump arrives. Don’t believe all the doom mongering about everything failing after 35. Look after yourself xx
 
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Ah thank you everyone 😢 I’m very upset about it. I’m getting married next June and would have so loved a baby before hand as I’m pushing 36. I had a miscarriage in December and just don’t seem to have any luck
If it helps at all - I fell pregnant with my first 4 months after my 36th birthday. I’m now pregnant with my second and I turned 40 last august. TTC and pregnancy at any age is an anxiety filled process. Sending you lots of love!
 
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Thank you everyone for the really kind words. I’m also sorry if I’m upsetting any expectant mums. I’m so devastated and feel so alone so this forum gives me some comfort. It’s never an easy thing to go through but I think it’s so difficult on your first. After my D&C in December the doctor kept telling me next time you will be lucky but I feel like the most unluckiest person in the world. I’ll bounce back and get strong again but I’m just mourning the loss of my special little baby that never made it here
 
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my mum had me at 38 and I turned out fine, lots of women are having babies into their 40s now - I’m sure there’s a few of us on this thread that are older mums.
I second this.

I had my son at 30 and now have a newborn at 38 😊
Id had a scanty period followed by two missed ones, straight away my lovely female GP went to peri menopause she explained she would do a blood test which would include checking my FSH levels if things hadn't put themselves right within the next three months.

I remember thinking tit ok I'm peri and this is how it all starts now I feel daft, I even asked if it can affect your bladder, yes she said, then got me up on the examination table and did an internal, she asked me lots of gentle questions about how was mum life and my son (I was genuinly oblivious lol)
I was then given a sample bottle and told she'd give me a quick call back that afternoon .....
I thought my body was one and done and as I'd been having a bad time generally month on month through a fibroid it was all very unexpected but as they say it just goes to show x
 
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Thank you everyone for the really kind words. I’m also sorry if I’m upsetting any expectant mums. I’m so devastated and feel so alone so this forum gives me some comfort. It’s never an easy thing to go through but I think it’s so difficult on your first. After my D&C in December the doctor kept telling me next time you will be lucky but I feel like the most unluckiest person in the world. I’ll bounce back and get strong again but I’m just mourning the loss of my special little baby that never made it here
You’ve not upset any of us. A lot of women in this thread have sadly suffered losses along the way, or who have found the journey challenging, so you’re amongst people who understand here and who don’t judge anyone for anything ❤. Processing this is important for your wellbeing.
You’re of course welcome here all the time but I wanted to tell you there is a TTC thread as well which has always been super supportive to everyone through the highs and the lows. Lots of us have migrated over from there/keep checking into there to see how our thread mates are doing.

as an ETA, I’m (almost) 40 and didn’t start TTC till I was 38 because of a multitude of reasons. I started my periods extremely young as well, like 10 or 11, if that happens to make a difference. At my recent scan my husband and I definitely didn’t feel like we were some geriatric couple in the waiting room. We might have been the oldest but not old enough to be anyone’s grandparents, haha. So far, though I haven’t really been hanging out with loads of expectant couples I’ve seen a real age range amongst people in the waiting rooms with us, so whilst it’s probably statistically easier when you’re younger, it’s not necessarily impossible ❤
 
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Aw thank you that’s so lovely of you as well to give me hope. My partner to be was getting quite upset and anxious over it as he will be 40 next year and I guess the both of us have just longed for this baby before the wedding that our hopes are slowly crashing down. By some Devine miracle I’m hoping there’s still some hope but I’m with the doctor tmro and hopefully they can give me some clarity. It’s very unusual for me to miss a period so I don’t know what’s going on and not many women talk about chemicals. Thank you for your lovely message and I’m really glad to hear you got your gorgeous baby 💕
 
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In a follow up from my 12 week scan meltdown, I was so upset about how it had gone and the fact that the failure to screen had been put down solely to my BMI that I decided to talk to my midwife about it. She escalated it to a more senior midwife who called me yesterday and was really nice. It turns out I’m not the first person to raise stuff like this about this particular sonographer , someone else reported a similar experience a couple of weeks ago and they believe other women have experienced the same but haven’t wanted to speak up on a formal or informal level about it. So, because I did want to speak up on an informal level it’s going to the line manager as feedback. I don’t doubt the sonographer is good at her job, it was just her lack of communication with me and then talking really fast about the quadruple test being my only option that left me really upset. I had a private scan on Sunday, with an ex-NHS midwife of 40 years. I told her about my nhs scan experience and she just explained everything so well to me. Explained all the things the sonographer will have recorded about what she saw that I can’t see in badger notes. Explained that it can be super hard to do the screening because the babies don’t behave as they’re expected to. Mine is a proper mover and groover (I have no idea if that’s normal or not because I’ve never seen a live scan and assumed babies just floated about sedately till I saw mine wriggling around!) and loves being faceplanted, loves hugging the back of my uterus and also loves lying on its side facing my spine. So, screening measurements were always going to be hard. I mentioned my bmi had been blamed and she was a bit more ‘eh, it’s not really the be all and end all’. She had me move about to scan different ways but at no point jabbed me hard in the abdomen with the scanner. Because it wasn’t a screening scan I felt like we got lots of time to watch our little JuniorDragName and I have 23 images and videos. I do understand a private scan will always have a different purpose and the nhs scan was about important medical stuff and that should take priority, but not everyone has the luxury of affording extra scans whenever they feel like them, and all it would have taken was the nhs sonographer taking a bit more time to talk things through so the parents can enjoy the view whilst the sonographer does what they need to.

NIPT screening bloods tomorrow, we’ve decided to find out the biological sex of the baby as well. I know it’s dumb but my mind is blown that that is even possible.
 
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In a follow up from my 12 week scan meltdown, I was so upset about how it had gone and the fact that the failure to screen had been put down solely to my BMI that I decided to talk to my midwife about it. She escalated it to a more senior midwife who called me yesterday and was really nice. It turns out I’m not the first person to raise stuff like this about this particular sonographer , someone else reported a similar experience a couple of weeks ago and they believe other women have experienced the same but haven’t wanted to speak up on a formal or informal level about it. So, because I did want to speak up on an informal level it’s going to the line manager as feedback. I don’t doubt the sonographer is good at her job, it was just her lack of communication with me and then talking really fast about the quadruple test being my only option that left me really upset. I had a private scan on Sunday, with an ex-NHS midwife of 40 years. I told her about my nhs scan experience and she just explained everything so well to me. Explained all the things the sonographer will have recorded about what she saw that I can’t see in badger notes. Explained that it can be super hard to do the screening because the babies don’t behave as they’re expected to. Mine is a proper mover and groover (I have no idea if that’s normal or not because I’ve never seen a live scan and assumed babies just floated about sedately till I saw mine wriggling around!) and loves being faceplanted, loves hugging the back of my uterus and also loves lying on its side facing my spine. So, screening measurements were always going to be hard. I mentioned my bmi had been blamed and she was a bit more ‘eh, it’s not really the be all and end all’. She had me move about to scan different ways but at no point jabbed me hard in the abdomen with the scanner. Because it wasn’t a screening scan I felt like we got lots of time to watch our little JuniorDragName and I have 23 images and videos. I do understand a private scan will always have a different purpose and the nhs scan was about important medical stuff and that should take priority, but not everyone has the luxury of affording extra scans whenever they feel like them, and all it would have taken was the nhs sonographer taking a bit more time to talk things through so the parents can enjoy the view whilst the sonographer does what they need to.

NIPT screening bloods tomorrow, we’ve decided to find out the biological sex of the baby as well. I know it’s dumb but my mind is blown that that is even possible.
I’m really glad you spoke up. I hate how some staff speak about BMI! I had a similar experience but the opposite way I guess - a sonographer said to a trainee something along the lines of how much easier it was to scan me compared to the previous woman because I was so ‘lovely and slim’. I was literally in the depths of my eating disorder and having a scan as part of our fertility investigations so it wasn’t the compliment she thought it was!
 
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