Pregnancy #62

[Crypticqueenie]

Looking for some advice. I'm about 5 weeks and I CANNOT stop eating. I have never known hunger like it. It was what made suspicious and test. I wake up in the night because of hunger pangs. I will eat dinner and my tummy will be rumbling half an hour later like I haven't eaten anything. I've tried eating little and often, tried typical foods that fill you up, drinking lots of water and NOTHING fills the hole. I have already gained weight from it. I am very conscious about not overeating and gaining unhealthy amounts of weight (obviously it's normal to gain some and be hungry but this is something else) but I can't help it. Does this pass? Any ideas to stop constantly feeling painfully hungry?

Also I know it's impossible to be showing already but I am very bloated but my bloat looks very baby bump shaped, not like any bloating I've had before, it genuinely looks like I have a cute little bump. Does this go away? We aren't telling people until we've had the scan but I don't want people seeing my bump shaped bloat and asking me.

I'm 7 weeks and then same! Have you tried upping protein? I haven't cause I'm too nauseous and don't fancy it but it massively helped my hunger in general pre pregnancy.
That said, I'm just letting myself eat I haven't gained weight yet but I'm plus size anyway so don't know if that comes into it.
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I felt dreadful for my first pregnancy and I've been great so far (8weeks). I put on the seasick bands about 3 weeks ago and only take them off to shower. No idea if they work or I'm just lucky this time

The bands help me soooo much I can't believe it!

 

[RoseyThorney]

Thanks all for your babymoon input. I’m hoping to see a last minute deal for some time off we have coming up in November.

 

[Shinythings]

Agreed, call the midwife @yankydoo fingers crossed it’s nothing but worth checking
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I’m getting so annoyed with my MIL as my due date approaches. I’d love to hear how others actually dealt with this when going into labour. She has made multiple comments about feeling entitled to see her grandchild asap and come round asap, blah blah. We’ve said we’ll see how we feel (which is even more pertinent now as 3 of my NCT course friends have now had their babies and have stayed in hospital for 5-7 days, so you never know what to expect!)

Now MIL is messaging to make sure we keep her updated (I.e via WhatsApp etc). I’ve said we’ll share our news when we are ready! I don’t know what more she wants - a running update of my cervix dilation and which meds I’m on?!

I fully understand it’s an exciting time for everyone and im probably just sensitive about it but I wish everyone would just go away. Obviously if something goes wrong or me or baby are unwell we’ll share news asap. I just am getting so annoyed about the feeling of everyone looming over me when I just want to focus on me and my baby and my husband and have it as a special, private time
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I wish I could remind them that in the 80s and 90s they had to wait for a phone call, people are too used to 500 WhatsApp’s and day and photos asap!

Boundaries! Is your partner on your side. I would just be very clear that family will be updated as and when and there is no need to keep contacting for updates during labour. I would even go so far as to say 'we will be focusing on our baby's delivery and won't be responding to messages'.

Then after again, when we feel ready, we will invite you all to meet them. We want to take time to settle and whilst we appreciate you are excited, we don't want to feel overwhelmed. I'd also maybe chuck something in there about how having too many visitors and disruption too soon after birth is linked to PND.

 

[Elisha97]

First of all if you are worried at all then call triage for advice and reassurance

I just wanted to share though that I’ve had food poisoning (twice!!!!!) and a breast abscess that the doctors cannot get under control (I’ve been on antibiotics for four weeks and had it drained at this point) I also had the same worries but baby is absolutely fine and no doctors have had any concern that she would come to any harm, sometimes it can be easy to focus on the stories about worst case scenarios 🩷🩷

hope you feel better soon!!!

That makes me feel so much better thank you!! I’ve been so careful all year but been to hospital a couple of times recently and women brought their disgusting partners that coughed everywhere, wandered into our cubicle coughing, and used the patient only toilet etc so I’m assuming I picked up their illness from that I think it triggered me a bit as I was really poorly with sinusitis when I had a loss before even though I know and have been told it wasn’t connected I feel like death warmed up but I feel better that the baby is up and moving now, she’s probably just had a lazy day

 

[JombleWomble]

I had no gut instinct whatsoever but my partner was convinced it was a girl from the moment we got the positive test. He was right, and didn’t once consider it could be a boy. Just kept saying he knew

I'm in a similar situation. My partner is convinced we're having a boy but I don't know at all. Whenever I picture myself with a baby I see a girl, but whenever I picture myself further in the future I see myself with a male toddler. Before the first scan I kept dreaming it was twins but it isn't so my subconscious is clearly rubbish at this

 

[scouseconstantine]

Can’t believe I can tick the 27 week category it’s going so slow but so fast at the same time

 

[Greencatfysh]

20 week scan at fetal medicine today
Nervous as I know they had a couple of concerns last time but with low risk results on nipt it does help us worry a little less.. I really hope they don’t find anything else wrong as it’s already been such a rollercoaster to this point

Also hope we actually get a scan photo this time as if everything is okay with baby we will finally be telling some family/friends that don’t know yet
The last 2 scans they didn’t give us one but that was outside of the 12 week scan so maybe it’s normal they don’t.

We had to ask specifically for photos with the NHS scans as they charge you for them now 🫠 just remember to ask at the start! Fingers crossed all goes perfectly for you xx

 

[Keera]

Does anyone have any advice on how to navigate in laws being a bit too … excited?
First grandchild on both sides and while I’m grateful (really truly) for all the help and advice we are getting already (25 weeks .. when did that happen ) my experience with my own parents has been so laid back in comparison to my in laws and I’m starting to already get stressed about how much they plan to be involved!
My own parents have offered help and advice when asked and my mums taken me shopping to pick things out myself and has been happy to buy - with a couple of little nice surprises like toys and books. But the “big important things” they’ve always let me and partner choose without any input unless asked.
my in laws are buying are travel system which is lovely BUT they insisted on also coming to the appointment (fine) and gave a running commentary on why the pram/car seat would not be suitable for THEM!! for example, FIL made the sales woman try pram out in both ours and their car - it fits in ours but needs a wheel off to fit in his. He says this is going to be “unmanageable”.
I fear they think they will have the baby a lot without me and partner and I am unsure where they get this from as we have only broached them having a day a week when I go back to work when baby’s 9 months?
They are also already booking weekends away wanting to take us and the baby when I’ve been quite clear to partner I want our first holiday with baby to be the three of us, and I’m already dreading explaining I do not want any visitors to the hospital provided baby and I are well and go home in a day or two after birth.
Partner is aware of my wishes and knows his parents can be “hard headed” but I don’t think he realises how tense I’m getting over this
Maybe I’m being unreasonable but I’m worried about small tensions causing a huge blow up in the future

 

[AL10]

Wow the waiting around doesn’t help the nerves does it so far tho everyone has been lovely!

 

[Keera]

Does anyone else get a bit stressed about their diet? I’ve never had a particularly healthy diet - partly down to laziness on my part, but I feel like I start of the day well eating non sugary cereal, a normal lunch with fruit and lots of water and then it’s all down hill n I’m eating family size chocolate bars and cans of coke now I’m starting to get worried she’s not getting enough nutrients and I’m harming her

 

[yankydoo]

Hi ladies who are further on than me () when in your pregnancy did you do everything like build bassinets/prams, have hospital bag ready for etc?
I’m only 26 weeks but both my mum and my MIL got caught out by baby’s coming at 30 weeks and think I should start having it all sorted.
I have mostly all I need now but tbh - I’m kind of scared and nervous to set it all up as it’s making it feel real
Obviously I hope she stays in there cooking for another 10+ weeks at least but now I’m scared I’m not prepared enough

I've probably left things fairly late.

I'm 34 weeks this week. Pram was bought a couple of weeks ago and built this weekend. I have yet to sort out my hospital bag but have most of it prepped. Plan on finalising it this week and weekend.

We haven't yet put the next to me cot together nor have I washed the bedding. Hope to do that this week and weekend too.

 

[Kaylarina]

Wow congrats on being on number 3 I’m only just ready for 2! shouldve sued her I’d be rich now . Yes good idea it’s just so weird there and not like here how you can go to the midwife unit the majority of the time but you would actually need to go out of your way to find your own midwife / birthing unit and I don’t even know how that would’ve worked with insurance. I definitely didn’t know anyone who did it. All straight to the hospital epiduraled up ASAP! sooo medical over there nothing left naturally. Hoping for a different experience this time just scared of the ancient hospital and shared wards

Yup, number 3. I blame the oldest. She lulled us into a false sense of security by being an angel. We call number 2 our Tiny Terrorist and are now just all in on the chaos so what’s adding a 3rd to that…!

It is weird here. I did look at finding a birth unit. We’re In Los Angeles and I found one birth/midwife unit that I would say is comparable to the UK all the others were a little too hippie for me besides, our second came in 17 minutes and I don’t really want to be caught in the car on the 405!
It is all medical here. It’s odd if you don’t want an epidural.

Fingers crossed you get a positive experience. I’m with you on the shared wards. I hate hospital wards.

 

[Keera]

Thank you for all the love 🥹 I just don’t know what to do now haha! How do I get a midwife? Do I just call the midwifery department and tell them I’m pregnant? Is it a catchment area thing, or can I pick which hospital? Is there anything else I need to do? I’ve already been taking folic acid for 8 months so I’m good on that front!

depending on your area you can send online forms or get the number direct to register - some people have to go through their GP, I just googled my trust name and maternity services and it told me what to do. GP surgery website sometimes has phone numbers/links also!

ETA: I still think it’s strange no one tested my urine for pregnancy

so excited your here woooo 🩷🩷

 

[scouseconstantine]

with my first they did book an appointment to visit before birth, but baby came 3 weeks early, she knocked on the door and was like ‘oh I see you had the baby already I’ll leave you to it..’ then we never saw that one again

Maybe its just some areas that do a quick home visit before birth, but I’ve heard it’s usually just questions like where will baby sleep, plans for feeding etc, I don’t think they nose around your house unless things have changed

I feel like we saw ours way too much between 0-6months, and they were way too strict and marked little one down for stupid things like not being able to rattle a toy at 2-3 months and then they will leave you alone and don’t bother with you again until 12months to come back and mark you down again because baby isn’t colouring in or hasnt got multiple words yet. It’s so silly how awful they make you feel for your baby being ‘behind’ on milestones when they’re not! I’m glad I know for next baby to not pay any attention to their super strict and limiting guides for these milestones

luckily I work in a nursery and have a degree in early childhood education so I feel like if they start on the milestone shaming I can tell them where to go my favourite thing to tell parents in my workplace when they start stressing about milestones is that ‘development is a spiders web, not a straight line, every child develops differently’

I’ve seen so many parents worried and shamed by health visitors and I know they’re just doing their jobs but it really does effect some parents and gets them so worked up. I had one parent in floods of tears because their health visitor told them their one year old would never achieve in life because they hadn’t taken the dummy away before 12 months. I understand watching for developmental issues but half the time they just focus on the silly stuff and not the sen needs because they don’t want to diagnose. We look after a little boy who is clearly on the spectrum and after spending ten minutes with him the health visitor was like nah he’s fine bye. They just don’t have enough time for every child and it’s upsetting

 

[scouseconstantine]

Woke up in the middle of the night to my boyfriend and bump playing a lovely little game. He’d squeeze my belly and then she’d quite happily kick him and have a wiggle. Oh but when bump realised Id woke up…no more kicks the betrayal from my future daughter has begun already!!

 

[Kaylarina]

This is actually great advice that I’m going to take on board - my in laws listen to what we say (no visitors to hospital we will let you know when we are ready for you to come and meet baby - which will be within a couple of days I don’t mean WEEKS) but then they just act as if we mean everyone ELSE and not them!
Partner finally explained there will be no long stays with them or overnights for at least 6 months as I’m intending to breastfeed which caused a bit of a sulk if I’m honest.
I get they are excited but I feel like there is an entitlement to the baby there which is getting my back up.
It’s such stark contrast to my own parents who are so laid back they are horizontal and while they are excited they are very much “whatever you need us to do we will do it”.

Sorry @Greencatfysh I’m always piggybacking onto the in laws posts it’s truly my biggest stresser at the moment

See, with us it was the other way around. My in-laws were very much "we'll work on your terms" and that was with them being on the other side of the world, whereas my family seemed to think they had a right to see our girls the moment they were born - despite them having next to no input in our lives and only seeing them a handful of times since then.

In the end, we didn't tell my family our first daughter had been born until she were about 3 or 4 days old.

It's also hard because as much as you can prepare, you don't know how you are going to feel until they are born and you've gone through labour. Yours might be quick and you feel comfortable seeing people earlier or it might be long and you're too tired to even entertain the though.

 

[Keera]

Wondering if someone can advise
I thought I was struggling with morning sickness as we’ve been on holiday for the last week and I have been feeling sooooo nauseous, last night I was actually sick but I have basically the runs too - Google is telling me that morning sickness doesn’t generally include the runs too so I am on the fence as to whether it could be a bug or not

i have IBS which is definitely worse since pregnancy, and I’ve found my tummy’s a bit more sensitive to spicy food too.
if you have had diarrhea and don’t normally have any tummy problems it more likely be a bug or something you’ve eaten, make sure you drink plenty of fluids and try and eat plain foods - if you aren’t keeping any fluid down or feel really dry and unwell/feverish get in touch with a doctor to make sure you aren’t dehydrated!
Stomach bugs should only last about 48 hours too so if it’s going on longer discuss with a doctor too!

feel better soon!

 

[littlepup]

I had a friend who could smell the cold air on her husband when he'd come back in from walking the dog in the morning... So weird!

Hold on, can’t everyone always smell the cold air?
I couldn’t stand the smell of my own hair or, which was totally horrible, the smell of my Mum. Not bo, perfume, laundry stuff or anything specific, just her.

 

[Amylaauren]

Hello ladies.

I was looking to book antenatal classes for me and my husband and was wondering if any of you have any strong opinions on NCT or Bump and Baby Club?

A pregnant friend is doing them both (?!) but I will definitely only get hubby to go to one lot, not to mention the expense. Does anyone have any experience with either? Xx

I posted last week after we attended our first bump and baby club and honestly we loved it!! The instructor was a midwife of 15 years and she was just amazing, there was about 10 other couples there as well so a great place to meet others who are due around the same time

 

[PrincessShark]

Anyone here with O- blood and had the anti-d injection? Is it true they inject it into your buttcheek? I’m fine with needles etc but the thought of one in my arse is making me cringe.

Also, an update on the drama with my parents… the air has been cleared with my dad but my step-mum is refusing to speak to me and isn’t sure if she wants to be involved. So now my dad feels torn between his wife and daughter/grand-daughter. I watched a YouTube video last night where someone said it’s an amazing feeling watching the people you love, love your children. And it made me feel sad that my own parents can’t remove their heads from their arses. 🫤

Usually in your upper arm only reason we may do it somewhere else is if you’re very slim, but the upper arm is the go to.

Also, so sorry things are so difficult with your family