Pregnancy #62

[Elisha97]

Thank you RE the bongos bingo input everyone honestly I’m too fat and shattered to do anything past 7pm these days

 

[Keera]

I was reading on another website about a MIL who made a whole nursery in the in laws house and expected to have the NEWBORN weekly overnight so I guess it’s not quite as bad as that yet
My MIL has never quite cut the apron strings from my partner (not that he’s unhappy with that I will add ) and so for them I feel the baby is just an extension of him. They’ve just gotten a little carried away with their plans and don’t realise that me partner and baby are going to be our own family unit first and foremost.
i think i will drop in the fact im going to breastfeed for at least the first 6 months ( ) and hope the message goes across that she won’t be away from me in that time unless absolutely necessary.
thank you all for making me feel like less of an ungrateful cow

 

[Spencerskates]

Two fun tales to share of the glamour of pregnancy…

Last Friday I ended up in the maternity unit as I thought my waters had broken… turns out it was just excess discharge from a nasty case of thrush! How DELIGHTFUL. Thankfully that’s now been treated.

But a week later (so last night) I thought I’d be there again as I am having so much pelvic pressure and then started having what felt like regular, intense period/gas pains. Were they contractions, were they false labour, were they Braxton Hicks, was it gas/needing a poo?!?

I hate how unpredictable everything is and how everything can be mistaken for something else!

I’m 39+3 and scheduled for an ELCS on Monday (posting this Saturday morning, the “contractions” have passed but I’ve deffo lost my mucus plug last night!)

Anyone else relate? I hope I can cling on til Monday, I still have to sort a few bits out

Make sure you let the hospital know! When I had my ELCS, the other woman who was initially meant to go in the afternoon ended up being put through first because she’d started in labour, so they do prioritise.

Ended up in hospital again last night due to HG. Had anti-sickness injection and plenty of fluids, feeling slightly better this morning but now got the runs literally can’t catch a break!

 

[anything at all]

Ohhh I would normally agree but I went into Next a week ago and newborn boys selection was actually sooooo much better! Maybe it was just better stocked but they had so many cute stuff I almost regretted a girl for a second.

I love some of the boys stuff next has right now but my husband doesn’t want to pay the price he didn’t care about the price of anything with our first so I’m slightly annoyed but I do get it as it feels like they’re really in these clothes 5 mins before they go to the size up! I will be keeping my eye on vinted in case any of them pop up between now and when baby is here though

Thank you for all the replies. I think the posters saying about being able to get over the (short lived) disappointment if it’s not the one you were hoping for is ringing true for me. I feel like it’s going to be so overwhelming in the post-birth moments that if it’s the “wrong” sex it will just seem so much worse, but then more than likely I’m just going to be so relieved he/she is here that it won’t matter and there’s going to be all sorts of other emotions going on anyway. Probably worrying for nothing so I can take this off my long list of other things I’m worrying about!

I think if you possibly have a preferred gender then maybe it’s better to find out before. Once you give birth in the days and weeks afterwards there’s a lot going on and the possible baby blues and random crying and I wouldn’t have wanted any sort of gender disappointment on top of that 🥲 that’s my thoughts on it anyway!

I wanted a girl both times and cried many times when I found out my first was a boy, but we picked out a name, was buying him things and I then never felt sad since. I didn’t cry this time I found out I was having a boy, I was a bit sad but not sad that he was a boy, just sad that I may never have a girl as I don’t think we’ll have more children.

 

[Amylaauren]

I’ve had a sweep today!! Wasn’t bad at all but also ended up at MAC with high blood pressure which is now back to normal thankfully

 

[Elisha97]

I knew I was pregnant that month and I had a gut feeling I was having a girl! It’s so weird, I do think your subconscious plays more of a part than we realise

I had a weird premonition the night before I found out and felt really emotional the day or so before because my partner was working away and I knew I’d be testing and wanted him there cos I knew I’d have something to tell him. I was having fertility problems and my cycles were really odd and off balance so it was very unlikely I actually was pregnant. But my body knew!

 

[Blue water44567]

31 weeks and experiencing mild period pains frequently. Freaking out had my twins at 32 weeks so full panic mode. Just passed by for some reassurance think last time i was ticking the 12 box this one really has flew by for me! Pelvic pain is a struggle too, someone said to me it’s a boy thing! Wishing you all healthy pregnancies and labour

 

[mashedbananapancakes]

Congratulations to all of you newly expecting mums

I rang my GP when I had got to 4-5 weeks and the receptionist said 'is it a happy pregnancy' and then gave me the number for the local midwives hub who took my details and arranged my booking appointment.

I also said the same thing to my husband as someone has mentioned about not actually testing my urine and they just took my word that was I pregnant

Am now almost 30 weeks with my first - due early January!

 

[Crypticqueenie]

24 weeks today which is one of my milestones in this pregnancy.

I’m absolutely floored by anxiety and paranoia and the threat of danger all around me. Like my mentally unwell SIL who seems to think she’ll be our childcare and will drive the baby around despite the fact her license has been revoked because of her MH. I’m having nightmares about her harming our baby at our wedding. The slightest disappointment or stress or irrational thought is sending me over the edge. Like the creeps coming onto our shared driveway after sunset and leaving a dodgy looking trailer but legally we don’t have a leg to stand on. Who are these strangers creeping around our flat??

My next psychologist appointment can’t come soon enough.

I'm sorry you're feeling like this and that things are happening around you that are making it worse. MH when pregnant is such a wild ride, your brain is trying so hard to protect you and baby. That's good you have a professional to talk to.

 

[Angrysue_]

Hi everyone, just found out I’m pregnant yesterday 🥹 can I join the thread? First time mum here, no sisters and no friends who have had a baby and feeling quite overwhelmed!

Omg Massive congratulations

First time Mam her too and just recently found the thread. I love it. It's lovely to speak to other Mam's and get advice. I am the same, only one of my friends has a child and she is 15 now so things are different. I feel like I literally have absolutely no idea what I even need to buy

Welcome in

 

[Folkevermore]

5 weeks pregnant and already feeling that this time round is going to be a whole different ball game having a toddler too! I’m so tired already. And I work full time.

I totally get the tiredness thing - I’m just short of five weeks but I’ve been having to take naps on the daily

 

[Spencerskates]

Baby skates is just getting over hand, foot and mouth disease (for the second time🫠) and I’m now convinced I’ve got it. I’ve got a mouth full of ulcers and a couple of spots on my hand. Google tells me it’s more dangerous in the last trimester, but do I still need to tell my midwife? I’m only 9 weeks.

 

[scouseconstantine]

Thank you for all the love 🥹 I just don’t know what to do now haha! How do I get a midwife? Do I just call the midwifery department and tell them I’m pregnant? Is it a catchment area thing, or can I pick which hospital? Is there anything else I need to do? I’ve already been taking folic acid for 8 months so I’m good on that front!

congratulations!! I was told to go to my gp surgery and get a midwife referral form. On this they had options of which hospitals were closest and you could choose which one you wanted your care to be at

 

[ASAnigel]

This is my PSA to anyone putting off building baby equipment - we just spent a good four hours building our pram, travel system and this ridiculous bassinet thing we’ve got for downstairs. It turned out ok but it was defective and we had to manually dismantle and fix part of it. Don’t leave it til you’re too pregnant!!

We’re planning to build the next to me tomorrow - I’m usually the designated furniture builder in this house so I’m going to have to very closely supervise the husband. All the wardrobes and dressers I’ve put together are still firmly standing, his desk he put together is falling to pieces

 

[anything at all]

We had to ask specifically for photos with the NHS scans as they charge you for them now 🫠 just remember to ask at the start! Fingers crossed all goes perfectly for you xx

Thank you, I really hope it goes okay, and no new worries

Our scan department always charged for them with my first pregnancy but at our 12 week scan this time they were free as they said the payment machine was broken

Even the 2 scans I had with epu at the start they gave me scan pics free - I didn’t even have to ask for them!

At fetal medicine I’ve had 2 scans there now and no scan pictures but think I will ask today to make sure we get something then ! At worst I’ve got a terrible scan picture from window to the womb at 17 weeks that I could show people 🫠

 

[Keera]

Argh, I could have written this. My in laws are similar, not as bad as yours sound in terms of the travel system etc but I’m sure they would have been - we’ve had to have a few pretty awkward conversations with them so far about things like this. I’m also anxious about it and my partner wasn’t really taking it seriously til last week. His dad made some comment about my husband “popping round to check on the house once a week” (they travel a fair bit) and husband had to say look, things will be different once baby arrives!


They expected to buy us something “big” I.e the travel system and I think they were taken aback we didn’t include them in that shopping. Our main gripe has been about them “popping over” as soon as baby arrives which we had to correct them on. My husband also seemed to think they’d be having the baby sleep at theirs - I was the same, I said maybe when she’s 9/12 months but it would be very rare for us, the main thing they MIGHT do is come and babysit for us at our own house. My advice would be unfortunately to have some awkward chats now about it and try and get through to them, you’ll only feel more annoyed and anxious as the due date approaches (speaking from experience)

Ah its so hard trying not to upset anyone - especially when I know they are helping us out massively financially with the travel shstem!
yes the “popping in” is already a bit of an issue and has been anytime partner and I have lived within a 15 minute driving radius of them. I’m not sure they know either that I’m going to be breast feeding and I’m sure that will cause upset
The other thing that’s really setting alarm bells off is the unwillingness to learn about new safety aspects - their last newborn was 30 years ago!!!! But comments have already been made like “it’s like riding a bike” looking after newborn and I want to scream that I’m sure it is NOT 🫠

I’m going to go through my birth plan with partner this weekend so he knows what’s happening and try and impress upon him how I want visiting in the first few weeks to be so he can break the news gently that we will not be requiring a daily “pop in”

 

[plonkington]

Can I check with previous new mamas - I’ve been warned to get a) tons and tons of maternity pads as you can expect to bleed so much in the days following (obviously I expect this but how much do you actually get)? I was also warned off buying the Tena incontinence knickers as they can create a more damp environment for healing wounds and

b) told to get dark coloured sheets and some kind of mattress protector or puppy training pads for the days after birth. How many people actually needed those things?

So I’m a week after birth, I used in the hospital Always disposable pants and for the next 2 days at home.
I found them really super absorbent and comfortable to wear, also I’ve sworn this week by the Spritz for Bits it’s really taken the edge off stitches.
Then switched to the boots own maternity pads, now on regular pads as I havent really been bleeding too much this last day so I’ve not personally used many so far. It might come back so I have another stash of pads.
The disposable knickers maybe a little too high for c section mummas.

 

[Greencatfysh]

Just had a Brazilian wax mostly because I haven’t tended to my lady garden since May poor waxer. Ready for birth now though. Jeez, it hurt a lot more!

 

[Kaylarina]

On another rant about pregnancy things that annoy me.. I have quite a few friends/ family members/ people I know that make no effort to see me now but want to come round as soon as the baby is born and see her?? Like these people live round the corner up to 15 mins drive away and have said stuff like ‘we must meet up when the baby is here’ and ‘you will let me come see the baby won’t you’. But the same people completely ignore me and never see me now despite me asking and always trying; I’m someone who goes out a lot and always makes the effort and makes plans to see people

Maybe I’m being sensitive but.. Our baby is due in Jan and I need a C section.. why the F would I want to see you after major surgery at the peak of all the winter illnesses with a newborn when you couldn’t be bothered to see me while I was still pregnant or even before then?? Or even speak to me for that matter? The same people ignored me during my miscarriages and tough times so I’m feeling extra irate about it

My family were like this. Barely make an effort but kicked up such a fuss when our first was born about how they had to see her...then saw her a maximum of 5 times in the first 2 years of her life, whereas my in-laws (who at the time were on another continent!) were happy to go with the flow and what we want.

If you didn't make an effort before, I don't want to know!

 

[littlepup]

We’ve bought everything second hand so far too and looks like we’ll be doing the same for the pram. The shop prices are often ridiculous aren’t they?! We can’t afford it, especially as I’ll be going down to maternity pay

I’ve said this before but there are baby toy and clothes subscription services and baby equipment hire sites that are beloved by the middle class mummy influencer types. £150 to rent a stroller for their Maldives holiday or £40 a month to be sent new toys you return each month. It’s a flex.
I don’t see how buying second hand is any different. Better for the environment, supports other families or charity shops, baby doesn’t know the difference from fresh out of the box. Everyone wins imo.