Pregnancy #45

[shhh1712]

I find my midwife appointments a bit useless tbh. She does my blood pressure and urine test at each appointment though. This week I had a question about citalopram, she usually just asks about my well-being and if I’m feeling baby move etc. im 31 weeks so I think as time goes on they will probably be more useful as I have more questions about birth etc.

 

[TheSilverFox]

For any of you who have already had a baby, how close were your instincts on when they’d be born?
From day one, I’ve just had a feeling our baby will be early. I know it doesn’t follow a pattern, but both me and my partner were two-three weeks early, and baby has been measuring big so far.

I’m a bridesmaid at a wedding in the summer (baby should be about 2 months old by this point) but the hen party is in May. We don’t have an exact date yet other than ‘some time in May’ but that’ll make me 35-39 weeks pregnant. It’s a good couple of hours train ride away and while it’s a casual event, I’m a bit weary being that far away from home while super pregnant.

I'd be wary of that too! I was a bridesmaid when my last baby was 4 weeks old, then again at about 12 weeks old, but I avoided the pre-wedding stuff (it was similar, both 3ish hours away). I thought my first would be late but was actually born almost 5 weeks early which made me nervous for the second one showing up unannounced! I also had a lot of hospital visits in those final weeks (esp with the second) that I hadn't anticipated and needed to go in frequently for monitoring. Could you wait it out and see how you feel at the time? You might feel okay and up to it, it's so hard to predict. I can't imagine anyone would mind you sitting it out given how pregnant you'll be either?!!

 

[TheSilverFox]

Im the same, have a wedding about six weeks after he’s due and my friend keeps asking me if I’ll be there. It’s three hours away, OH isn’t invited and no kids, so I’ve said probably not tbh as he’ll only be a month and a bit old, I plan on breastfeeding. I got a “can’t you just express?” Message back. Yeah in a perfect world I could, but you just dunno about supply, what if I have to get a section etc. also emotionally I just don’t feel like I’ll be ready ti be leaving him
A whole weekend! people who haven’t had or been around kids seem to think they just fly out and everything falls into place perfectly eh .

I breastfed both my other kids and was sooo lucky to have had a pretty easy time of it. There is absolutely no way I could have expressed enough milk at 6 weeks (actually I could never have expressed enough ever despite exclusively breastfeeding ) to go out for the day, never mind a whole weekend. You're so right, it's really hard to imagine having a newborn until you've actually had one! I was a bridesmaid when my baby was 4 and 12 weeks and it was a palaver trying to breastfeed around everything but I managed it (just). If you want to breastfeed you're still establishing your supply in the early weeks and you're both still learning how to do it etc. I think your friend is being a bit optimistic expecting a friend at her wedding without her newborn baby! xx

 

[Luisa18]

Sorry just a vent, really.

Stressed following consultant appointment today. Due to BMI and low PAPP-A risk factor am consultant led. 28 week growth scan was good and showing as mid percentile on the report provided afterwards. Popped into the consultant appointment which followed and he told me baby is currently on 10% percentile and I need to move to two-weekly scans rather than four. Mentioned risks of this and need to track etc etc.

Obviously this sent me into a panic (I was born at 28 weeks so am very sensitive with respect to prem-birth) and have been very upset this morning.

Noticed now though that the sheet he printed me out with the growth chart on shows my EDD as a week earlier (so 29 weeks rather than 28 which I actually am per dating scan) which may explain why baby is measuring so low but still very worrying. Also concerning that that wasn’t picked up at the time (I like to think I’m pretty on the ball with my medical docs and read the reports etc) but if you weren’t, or English wasn’t your first language, what would happen if this wasn’t picked up and the growth estimations adjusted etc?

Have asked my midwife for a call to discuss as they’ll need to update the record to reflect the actual EDD.

Sorry, as I said just a bit of a rant/talk it out. Pregnancy is hard and this hasn’t been a cakewalk.

 

[Ro98]

It’s cruel how employers can do this to people. Mine was the same, why are they so nasty? I hope you can all last a bit longer so you don’t lose out on your maternity packages.

It might be worth speaking to your GP or midwife for advice on who to speak to about essentially being bullied by work because you’re pregnant. My GP was very helpful and understanding.

 

[anything at all]

Midwife called this morning and said the hospital didn’t want to do a growth scan in the end as it’s not been long since my last (10 days)
But baby boy has other plans for us to still get seen anyway I guess as my waters have either broken or are leaking - well they haven’t stopped leaking but I have no other labour signs
As I’m only 36+5 we’ve been told to go to hospital to be seen now

 

[tattle420]

it only took me 12 weeks pp to get back on the pregnancy thread again! i missed everyone on here, but definitely have no intentions of getting pregnant anytime soon, so will just be lurking here and there

 

[disillusionedbythegram]

Met my consultant today and she was so rude, grumpy and condescending I am sure I must have had her last time too - she made a couple of patronising, sarcastic comments during my last pregnancy that really stayed with me. I had some questions to ask today, but her attitude was so off putting I couldn't bring myself to ask them. Once I'd realised it was her again and remembered the other horrible remarks she made last time it seemed pointless to ask anything and get another sarcastic, unhelpful reply. I find pregnancy so stressful after years of infertility and treatment and miscarriages, I hate these appointment at the best of times and horrible doctors like her just make it so much worse

No point to my post, sorry, just feeling fed up now! I have to go back for a rescan in a couple of weeks because baby wasn't playing ball either! Probably sensed the negative energy emanating from the consulting room and was trying to hide

I would ask for a different consultant and give examples of the way she’s spoken to you. It’s completely not on

 

[disillusionedbythegram]

Im the same, have a wedding about six weeks after he’s due and my friend keeps asking me if I’ll be there. It’s three hours away, OH isn’t invited and no kids, so I’ve said probably not tbh as he’ll only be a month and a bit old, I plan on breastfeeding. I got a “can’t you just express?” Message back. Yeah in a perfect world I could, but you just dunno about supply, what if I have to get a section etc. also emotionally I just don’t feel like I’ll be ready ti be leaving him
A whole weekend! people who haven’t had or been around kids seem to think they just fly out and everything falls into place perfectly eh .

I’ve said no to a friends wedding when my baby will be 3 months old because judging what my first was like, I won’t be able to leave this one longer than 2 hours until he’s 10 months old it’s also a ‘no kids’ wedding and abroad, and she’s still fallen out with me about it

 

[Ro98]

Blah. My sister has organised a baby shower for me and maybe I’m hormonal and over emotional but my family are moaning or saying they’re not coming because it’s not “local enough”. It’s 3 miles away, a 13 minute drive according to Google. My sister is organising and coming from over an hour away.
I’ve even offered those who don’t drive a lift home. Silence. So I sent a message yesterday evening that I get quite hurt that it was being treated as an inconvenience. What I really wanted to say in my moment of rage was if you cba coming to the baby shower don’t bother coming around when babies here, but I realise I was being extra and dramatic and refrained . Nobody has even bothered to reply to the message.

I just feel like I’ve been the family member always running around visiting people, arranging get togethers and phoning everyone all the time and nobody can be arsed to make the 13 minute journey for this, it bloody hurts.
Sorry for the long post

That’s horrible of your family, 13min drive!! And the fact no one has responded to your other message either I’d not bother with them once baby is born. May sound dramatic but they don’t care now or respect your feelings so why should you care?
Sending love as I also feel left out at times with family especially when I put a lot of effort into others lives & celebrations.
Take a back seat from them and I hope you can soak up all the baby fun at your baby shower with those who really care

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

I ate an Easter Egg whilst they broke my waters cos they warned me that after 2hrs I’d have to go on the drip if I didn’t start contracting myself and I’d be NBM. My mum was absolutely horrified in the first place that I was eating it at 7am, even more so when I told her to put it back when she tried to move it away. I wasn’t wasting a second 🫣

Amazing, I love it! I had to be nil by mouth from midnight for an operation once and was so worried about being hungry that the nurses brought me a huge supply of biscuits that I ate right up until 11.59pm I'll definitely pack a lot of biscuits in my hospital bag ready for potential nil by mouth in labour!

 

[I’mThankyou_]

Yeah I’m just worried I’ll go overdue and they induce me sooner than usual because of the extra 5 days making me seem later. I was late with both my girls and had complications so the 5 days could be an issue if it’s wrong. I’ll speak to my midwife as she was confident on the dates too and with my 2 earlier scans confirming it. Do they ever readjust dates based on the size at the 20 week scan? It’s been so long since my last pregnancy I can’t remember

Sperm can last inside the human body for 5 days, no one can be 100% sure on conception unless you've had medical help.
OPKs and BBT only give you an indication of when ovulation is about to occur, so there's still quite a room for error.
I'd trust the scan tbh, at 12-14 weeks the measurements are usually fairly accurate.

 

[PunkRocker]

Booked in for a section for the morning as induction failed! I’m so so nervous they explained I wouldn’t get to hold him for about 10 minutes which breaks me

I know it's easier said than done but try not to feel nervous. I was also worried when I was waiting to be taken down but it was actually a really pleasant environment as weird as that sounds. The nurses even commented on how calm I seemed during the section and I'm a massive worrier at the best of times. 10 minutes sounds like a long time but it will just be while they're weighing and measuring baby then you'll be able to hold him and hopefully they'll talk to you the whole time too so it won't seem like such a long wait. You've got this lovely, good luck x

 

[WhatABore]

I can’t say much because everyone on public transport annoys the absolute fuck out of me.
Everyone says stuff they shouldn’t when stressed and others need to have more awareness of those around them.
I’m a considerate person & would move for anyone / let anyone sit down on public transport if they needed to but most fuckers won’t do the same for others.
And honestly people who are always huffing & puffing yet not opening their eyes to those around them are rude. Had she been more self aware she would’ve seen you’re heavily pregnant & not tried to push past you.
Maybe I’m too protective but any knock to my bump I need anti-d & after a bleed and loss I’d go mental if someone tried to push past me.
Don’t let it spoil your day.

also why are bus drivers letting people on when there’s no space

she didn't try to push past them.
Pink lemonade said "she was looking to get past" so she moved.
And then said the lady said "Make room for a big one"
Nowhere did she say she pushed past.
Certainly no need for rude comments.
Hormones don't give you a free pass

 

[WeepingCassandra]

Last day at work done. I think I’ve got Stockholm syndrome as I’ve come home, flumped in the bed and I’m trying not to cry at the idea of not going back until next year I moan about my job to anyone that listens ffs!

 

[Definitelyme]

I wasn’t saying it was you I was saying it about someone else who said you could drink water. That was my point- the “you can drink water” is duff advice because as I said, you couldn’t even brush your teeth. I wasn’t saying what you said was duff.
--

To be fair though it doesn’t matter which of us you thought was wrong, we both did the exact same thing - gave our experience. Maybe a disclaimer at the start of each thread? Nobody is a medical professional (or if they are this isn’t their place of work) so it’s all lived experience advice.
Is the wiki still going?

 

[Miss M]

When do we need to start monitoring movements and being concerned when they’re reduced? I’m 21 weeks and have been feeling movements from 19 weeks. He was less active last week than he was the week before, and I hardly felt him move yesterday.

I’m 23 weeks and have felt movement since around 19 weeks too. I have started to notice patterns such as baby moving first thing in the morning, after eating etc. Yesterday I noticed I hadn’t felt baby all day and was in bits worrying so I called my maternity unit (at midnight!) and they asked me to come in. They found baby’s heartbeat straight away.

If you’re worried please go in, everyone I spoke to was more than happy to have me there and the midwife who saw me couldn’t stress enough how important is was that I come back if I’m worried again, no matter how many times

 

[pink_lemonade]

My boss is away today to Head office and is telling everyone there on my behalf I'm pregnant lol, she knows I hate being the centre of attention and it makes me so awkward so I'm so glad she's doing it for me.

I'm not having a baby shower either and have been quite clear on that to my friends since I told them I was pregnant. I told them if they really want to do something I'm happy to go for a low-key dinner but I really don't want a big fuss at all x

100% agree with the not having a baby shower, I’ve said from the moment I got pregnant I don’t want one much to my friend’s disappointed! Again, hate the attention on me, might have a little get together when baby is here but no I don’t wanna be centre of the attention!

 

[narcisxa]

100%! I had a friend say she “wasn’t waiting a week” to meet him and wants to meet him as soon as we’re home No fucking chance
I plan on waiting a day/2 before telling friends & some family that he’s arrived just so I’m not bombarded with calls / requests to visit.

I can’t imagine wanting people in my space and hogging baby when trying to establish breastfeeding, bond and recover. I want to hide myself away from everyone with my partner and soak up those first few weeks, flying visits for a quick cuddle or to see him are fine after a week but no way do I want people staying all day holding him.

My baby is 3 days old and other than my mum & dad, no-one will be meeting him for at least 2 weeks and even they just popped by. I had a decent labour and actually feel quite well, and I still think that space for a couple weeks is important. Set your boundaries and enjoy baby

 

[pink_lemonade]

Hope it all goes well! Was there any indication of this other than the scan?

The only thing I had noticed was baby movements were so strong, it really felt like the baby was right under my skin which probably sounds stupid but it felt like there was no layer between us. Even my boyfriend felt the movements and was like ‘wow, it feels like they’re really close’ but I thought it would have been because they’re bigger now as I’m 37 weeks today. I told my doctor this at the time and they said that it’s a possibility the movements felt like that because of lack of liquid or a mixture of both.

other than the above, no indication whatsoever! Which is really scary