Pregnancy #16 Baby brain galore

[ThePidge]

Has anyone got the app peanut? And had any success? It feels a bit cringe, sort if like tinder for mums and mum's to be! But I'm desperate for some new mummy friends

Yes, I have it but haven’t made any mates, I’m only on it for the notice boards/forums!

RE: speaking of friends. I feel like I’ve become a bit of a recluse with my pregnancy. I’m enjoying the quiet (whilst I can), spending time with my husband and just sorting my life out. Plus with the evolving covid, my friends are all out drinking and mixing, have kids in nursery and I’m too worried about catching it so I haven’t seen them (not their fault), we do catch up daily though!

Maybe I should make some mum friends

Edit to add: I was a bit behind on the thread, but as I’m catching up, I’m so glad to see that everyone else is being antiscocial

 

[standupsitdown]

Edit to add: I was a bit behind on the thread, but as I’m catching up, I’m so glad to see that everyone else is being antiscocial

Yes, it’s nice to come on here and get a bit of context and perspective.

 

[Easilyannoyed]

On the cycling shorts tip, boohoo do a fab maternity cycling short. They only go up to a 16, but I’m a 18 in trousers and they fit fab. I bought about 6 pairs when we had the heat wave the other week!



I’m 35, and I’m in that inbetween stage where either my friends have had kids and they are in their teens, or they have decided that they don’t want kids. I’ve comfortably decided who are my “friends for life” and who ill stick be talking to when im old and grey, and the ones who will only be in my life for a fleeting time.

I recently cut out two people who I met in a baby group when I had my son. One was 11 years younger than me and the other was 6, and we couldn’t be more different. We were in a group chat but I knew they spoke about me when I wasn’t there; I was the only one who was married, who worked, and only had one kid. They would take the piss and call me posh, rip apart my accent, and call me a nickname which I hated. One also borrowed about £40 off me as she was skint, and I couldn’t bare to ask for it back. I just cut ties.

Just onto cycling shorts I just wear non maternity ones in size L from
H and m and they fit amazing like not see through. Also I went to boots the other day and a girl with a baby started talking to me and then wanted my number so instead I gave her my Instagram she was really nice but I just felt really awkward like it wasn’t even on My local boots it was like 50 miles away she was very nice but still..

 

[Alexaj]

Has anyone got the app peanut? And had any success? It feels a bit cringe, sort if like tinder for mums and mum's to be! But I'm desperate for some new mummy friends

I have. It is a bit like a weird version of Tinder, waiting for someone to 'match' with. I do wonder what's wrong with my profile that I get so many views and hardly any waves I have one match and haven't reached out to her yet. I really should!

But like another poster said, forums can be a tad frustrating. The same questions crop up over and over again.

 

[Gorbs]

As far as friends are concerned I'm quite *lucky*(?) In that I've been treated like dog tit in the past and won't tolerate it any more now I'm getting to 30. Having 3 miscarriages last year on top of Covid really showed who actually cared about me and who was just using me for convenience. When I started being "sad" and couldn't deal with their problems for them, when I wouldn't go to their house to get full drunk because everyone bleep in the country was in their house, I was contacted less and less.
I've 2 girls I used to be friends with years ago and we're more of acquaintances now and they couldn't be more excited for us. My really good friend who also happens to be my cousin, contacted me every day of lockdown and I helped her through a bad breakup. Everything opened up and I now havent spoken to her in weeks. Last time we spoke I told her I was pregnant.

To summarise, people are arseholes, I've said it before and I'll say it again. Don't treat people how you would like to be treated, treat them how they treat you.
My husband is my best friend in the world and actually, his mates have been more kind and concerned about us this whole year than anyone from my side.

 

[Nursty]

39 weeks tomorrow


I’m 39 weeks and we’re basically now shielding. Husband has stopped playing football with his mates, we’re only having online food deliveries etc. Haven’t been in a restaurant since last year.

Family/friends will be asked to lateral flow before they meet baby.

I don’t care if people think we’re being too extreme!

I think you're exactly right tbh. We are going to do similar. The last thing I want is for husband to get covid and have to birth without him.
The only issue I can forsee is our 2 kids, they will be back at school the week before I'm due

 

[Hbirdette]

I don't post mine on social media. I posted a hand photo when they were both born and that's it. Which I know people hate.
I've had so many people message me and ask why I don't post them or that I'm being selfish for not posting them!
And others make comments like "Well nobody would even know you have kids because you don't post about them"

People are just nosey fuckers! I put the odd photo on my Instagram story but they don’t really show his face. Don’t get me wrong, I love him to death but I don’t feel the need to show him off on socials lol.

 

[Jellybean093]

I think you're exactly right tbh. We are going to do similar. The last thing I want is for husband to get covid and have to birth without him.
The only issue I can forsee is our 2 kids, they will be back at school the week before I'm due

Can you express your worry with the school?

 

[LilyRose1234]

As far as friends are concerned I'm quite *lucky*(?) In that I've been treated like dog tit in the past and won't tolerate it any more now I'm getting to 30. Having 3 miscarriages last year on top of Covid really showed who actually cared about me and who was just using me for convenience. When I started being "sad" and couldn't deal with their problems for them, when I wouldn't go to their house to get full drunk because everyone bleep in the country was in their house, I was contacted less and less.
I've 2 girls I used to be friends with years ago and we're more of acquaintances now and they couldn't be more excited for us. My really good friend who also happens to be my cousin, contacted me every day of lockdown and I helped her through a bad breakup. Everything opened up and I now havent spoken to her in weeks. Last time we spoke I told her I was pregnant.

To summarise, people are arseholes, I've said it before and I'll say it again. Don't treat people how you would like to be treated, treat them how they treat you.
My husband is my best friend in the world and actually, his mates have been more kind and concerned about us this whole year than anyone from my side.

I’m sorry to hear about the miscarriages, that must have been incredibly tough

Similar situation here - My closest friends genuinely couldn’t give a duck while I was pregnant never asked how I was when I horrendously ill, although now baby is here they wanted snuggles when she was born but haven’t bothered since about a week after birth I didn’t want to be the person who constantly only talked about being pregnant or my baby but a bit of interest would have been nice! On the other hand a friend I had drifted from has been amazing and my partners friends wives have been so supportive, and so I’m now far closer with them than with some of my oldest friends!

 

[Gorbs]

I’m sorry to hear about the miscarriages, that must have been incredibly tough

Similar situation here - My closest friends genuinely couldn’t give a duck while I was pregnant never asked how I was when I horrendously ill, although now baby is here they wanted snuggles when she was born but haven’t bothered since about a week after birth I didn’t want to be the person who constantly only talked about being pregnant or my baby but a bit of interest would have been nice! On the other hand a friend I had drifted from has been amazing and my partners friends wives have been so supportive, and so I’m now far closer with them than with some of my oldest friends!

Yep, sounds like the standard. My stance is, if you didn't give a tit about me before my babies are here, you're not coming to see them. Might be harsh but I dunno why people think it's ok to be a crappy person and then drop into your life as and when pleases them. I'm so glad you've got support from your partners friends too, acknowledgment goes a long way!

 

[LilyRose1234]

Yep, sounds like the standard. My stance is, if you didn't give a tit about me before my babies are here, you're not coming to see them. Might be harsh but I dunno why people think it's ok to be a crappy person and then drop into your life as and when pleases them. I'm so glad you've got support from your partners friends too, acknowledgment goes a long way!

Also wonder how many of them only want to meet the baby so they can get some likes on social media I’m glad your husbands friends stepped up too!

 

[noseyqueen14]

Just onto cycling shorts I just wear non maternity ones in size L from
H and m and they fit amazing like not see through. Also I went to boots the other day and a girl with a baby started talking to me and then wanted my number so instead I gave her my Instagram she was really nice but I just felt really awkward like it wasn’t even on My local boots it was like 50 miles away she was very nice but still..

Oh I wanted these the other day but they only had smalls!!! I was wondering if it was a hint

 

[moimoi]

Has anyone got the app peanut? And had any success? It feels a bit cringe, sort if like tinder for mums and mum's to be! But I'm desperate for some new mummy friends

I spoke about this the other day in the new baby thread, I downloaded it and I had my first mum and baby date the other day. Had no idea how it would go as I’m the most socially awkward person ever, but we met up at a local park, did a lap around it with our buggies then sat and chatted in a cafe. We just spoke about boring mum stuff, our pregnancy and birth stories, obvs our babies etc but it was nice to get out and see our babies interact (blankly stare at eachother ) Her baby was only 6 days older than mine and was born at the same hospital.

 

[Smallpotato]

Just onto cycling shorts I just wear non maternity ones in size L from
H and m and they fit amazing like not see through. Also I went to boots the other day and a girl with a baby started talking to me and then wanted my number so instead I gave her my Instagram she was really nice but I just felt really awkward like it wasn’t even on My local boots it was like 50 miles away she was very nice but still..

Ah, id love that!

People are just nosey fuckers! I put the odd photo on my Instagram story but they don’t really show his face. Don’t get me wrong, I love him to death but I don’t feel the need to show him off on socials lol.

I don’t put my son on FB, but he’s on IG but the photo usually gets archived after a month. I haven’t announced my pregnancy on any socials, just on the close friends option on IG!

 

[standupsitdown]

The people who care about me enough to get in touch and see how I am know that I’m having a baby. The rest can find out when they see me waddling round Co-op or pushing a pram

 

[Smallpotato]

I think you're exactly right tbh. We are going to do similar. The last thing I want is for husband to get covid and have to birth without him.
The only issue I can forsee is our 2 kids, they will be back at school the week before I'm due

Totally agree with the shielding. My son starts school this September and I am already dreading the bubble bursting. I’m due January 17th, but my son was 3 weeks early, which takes us into the Christmas holidays. I really want baby born then, as we will be all shielding and son won’t miss school. Our nearest relatives are 70 miles away, so son will have to go and stay with them.

 

[springheeledyeti]

Guys this weird phenomenon is occuring in my house and my husband appears to be... Nesting???
He keeps clearing out drawers and cupboards and tidying stuff. He's packed and repacked the hospital bag. Totally bizarre since this is the man who operates from a floordrobe.
As I type this he's taking apart the hoover to clean it?!!

mine keeps organising stuff too, he’s got the changing table and some baby bits we’ve saved down from the loft, and been to IKEA for new stuff we need… I’m the one who STILL hasn’t cleared out the spare room

 

[Smallpotato]

Please send nesting husband vibes my way as my husband is buying and building robots and I’m frankly, SICK OF IT

 

[Nursty]

Totally agree with the shielding. My son starts school this September and I am already dreading the bubble bursting. I’m due January 17th, but my son was 3 weeks early, which takes us into the Christmas holidays. I really want baby born then, as we will be all shielding and son won’t miss school. Our nearest relatives are 70 miles away, so son will have to go and stay with them.

Our two burst within a week of eachother at the end of term so that fills me with trepidation.
Also, I'm pretty sure that things are going to be more relaxed when they go back and that there's not going to be bubbles/bubble closures? Unless I'm misunderstanding.
I don't know how I feel about it all. I guess it's going to lead to some discussions about potentially keeping them off too? Not ideal at all.

 

[WhatABore]

Yep, sounds like the standard. My stance is, if you didn't give a tit about me before my babies are here, you're not coming to see them. Might be harsh but I dunno why people think it's ok to be a crappy person and then drop into your life as and when pleases them. I'm so glad you've got support from your partners friends too, acknowledgment goes a long way!

One of my friends, I hadn't seen for well over a year before my daughter was born, came round when my daughter was a few months old. 3 years later, and haven't seen her since.