Perimenopause Moans #3

[zetta buttons]

Thank you for this. My grandma sadly passed away from complications arising from uterine cancer. She bled for years in her 70s but was too ashamed to tell anyone and it was my mum who figured it out when she was having problems in the loo. By that point it was too late. Hopefully, my mum’s generation (although I’m battling with her about a UTI at the moment ) and ours are more open and we can prevent similar things from happening.

 

[Lico]

Same here. I feel like an auld one. Aches and pains in my legs, hips and back. Got my hair done today, and clumps of it came out. Hairdressers has big long mirrors, and all I could see was a big belly hanging out of me. So unflattering.

 

[Stimpii]

Not sure if this is the right thread but I’m 4 days post op having had my ovaries and fallopian tubes removed.

Need to contact my gp to arrange some hrt before my surgical menopause kicks in. Not really sure what to expect.

 

[50sGirl]

I can be in the middle of a sentence and forget what I was talking about!

 

[Kittylover2019]

I’ve gone back on my patches. I thought they weren’t doing anything after being on them for a couple of years.

WRONG…..they must have been because I’ve felt this last couple of weeks like I need to be sectioned, I’m not being flippant when I say that either. Fragile, paranoid, scared, worried, mood fluctuating through the day, the list goes on and on.

I’ve stuck it back on and fingers crossed for the best

 

[maytoseptember]

@Suzesnooze - even the bloody NHS website says it’s a peri symptom. I know GPs aren’t experts in basically anything but jeez, it’s so frustrating when they’re so misinformed.

 

[veronica71]

It sounds like you're pregnant! Hopefully just similar symptoms to early pregnancy.

it would be the second coming if it was

 

[LanyardedHeretic]

I had an eye opening chat with a neighbour yesterday, she's 43 and has recently gone on HRT. She'd never considered peri but her debilitating anxiety and poor sleep was crushing her. Got her bloods tested, and yes, it was peri. I'm 44 and have struggled with anxiety for a few years now - chalked it up to some significant life stressors - but my periods have gone whakadoodle this year especially, my sleep is not what it once was, and well, anxiety can creep up on you, can't it? I started on beta blockers, and moved to mirtazapine, lowest dose. I am working on weaning myself off those now, and scared the crippling sleep sucking anxiety will come roaring back. But maybe it's something to do with peri all along, and fixed with HRT.

Anyone had anxiety as their main peri symptom?

 

[Jelly Bean]

I can look in the mirror and think I look quite nice and fairly youthful, then I'll see a photo of me and want to

Omg same here. I'm so cross with myself as my OH keeps asking if I want photos taken with my small grandchildren. I always say no as seeing the photos ruins my memory of the lovely time I've had with them. I genuinely don't think I'm that vain until I see photos or catch mirrors in shops and I just look so old and fat. And then feel deluded and sad that I've made an effort to look nice. I know some of it is due to the menopausal head f*ck. I've genuinely forgotten the feeling of looking in a full length mirror and being happy.

 

[zetta buttons]

j

Thankyou. I feel the same for you. It’s so horrible.
It’s helped me to learn it’s because of the drop in oestrogen which affects neurotransmitters. The hot flushes, sleep disturbances and night sweats are also due to changes in the brain.
Basically it’s not your fault, you’re not going mad and there are things you can do to feel better.
I’m frustrated I’ve had to suffer all this time and fight and pay to get the help I needed. But also very lucky that I’m in a position to be able to do that.
I wish you lots of luck x

I was reading last night that progesterone affects the GABA neurotransmitter. When progesterone falls, it has an impact on our sleep, anxiety, stress and resilience. It can also result in depressive symptoms. No wonder we feel as though we are falling apart. I learned about GABA at uni, but I was never taught about the link with progesterone. The more I read, the angrier I become, it isn’t rocket science, but it’s just that no one (funding bodies) seemed to think it necessary to do the research.

 

[BerlinILoveYou]

I'll look into Menopause Care as an alternative to Newsom. Newsom does seem extremely expensive. Their Google reviews are amazing, but trust pilot are mixed and i don't want to waste my money.

My friend who used Newsom also has a pretty good GP, and got her prescription via the NHS. I'll call her this week to see how she managed this.

I don't want to use the contraceptive pill either - i was on a variety of them earlier in life and they made me feel rotten. Never looked back after getting the copper coil and i enjoyed a life free of artificial hormones from the age of 32.

Aghhh it's all such a minefield isn't it!

My GP appt is on the 10th April, right now I'm 5 days out from when my period should arrive and I'm like a coiled spring. Though my partner slept in the spare room last night, so I had a reasonable night's sleep for the first time in weeks - normally I am awake from 3am and move to the spare room where I toss and turn until 6! I've also booked a day off work today and it feels good to not have to go into the office and put a fake smile on.

Thank you all for just chatting to me on here. It's nice to feel less alone.

 

[CallaLily]

I honestly have no idea how those of you with husbands / partners are coping while going through this.
I am almost 2 years single and even 2 years ago I was definitely feeling like I didn’t want to be around my partner as much and couldn’t tollerate his breathing or eating or mannerisms and sometimes just the smell of him annoyed me and we lived separately and only stayed together 2 nights a week

I have zero interest or intentions of ever dating anyone ever again at this point!
if I was full time married I’d end up in jail

There are days this feels a very real possibility
I've taken to just leaving the room if there are breathing/eating or general annoyances which I know aren't his fault. As MrL is retired and with me pretty much 24/7, this can be challenging. At least through the summer he been out in the garden a lot. I am more concerned now the weather is turning.

 

[CallaLily]

Reading your posts on not feeling it or feeling too exhausted to cope with this time of year.

I’m just coming round from a complete meltdown in front of my husband, over Xmas.

We only have one thing to do, and that’s go to his parents with sister in law, brother in law and nephew, but the thought of it all was getting too overwhelming for me… 8 hours couped up with five people I’d otherwise pay to avoid…
normally I’d grit my teeth and get through.

This year I’m just too anxious, knackered and overwhelmed. Hormones are all over the place and I honestly feel like I’m going to snap. Just told my husband to ring his folks and tell them I can’t do it. Which to be fair he did… now I just want to hibernate forever.

You've done the right thing for you and, your husband had supported you. Now the pressure of having the 'one thing' but a significant thing, which made you uncomfortable,to do is off, I hope you can take the opportunity to rest and relax.

 

[maytoseptember]

The worst thing for me is the weight gain. Up over a stone and it’s not from over eating etc, just hormones. It’s just totally knocked me and I feel absolutely vile.
As if women havnt been through enough and then you have menopause.

Same. All I see when I look in the mirror is a big fat arse and hips. I absolutely hate it, but I don’t have the energy for diet and exercise.

 

[maytoseptember]

Has anyone else had chest/heart flutters? Happened a few weeks ago quite often and wasn't sure if peri or due to something I was anxious about.

I’ve had absolutely horrendous palpitations all year. So much so I’ve been referred to cardiology (apparently it’s a 12 month wait) but chances are it’s due to low oestrogen.

Ironically, I’ve noticed the palpitations are particularly bad when my period is AWOL. Now I’ve flipped the script and have been bleeding for six weeks, the palpitations have more or less stopped. What’s worse?

I am SO fed up of having to wear pads or tampons constantly. Fed up with that feeling of a heavy period IYSWIM. I was prescribed tranexamic acid which slowed the bleeding right down but didn’t stop it completely. Then bam, back to heavy. Basically it’s been two periods back to back with constant spotting in between.

Saw a GP again today and have been prescribed norethisterone, have a pelvic ultrasound next week and a blood test to check my iron levels. Was also told that I’d been taking tranexamic acid for too long and to stop because it increases the risk of blood clots. Wonderful!

 

[Tank Girl]

There was an article on FB yesterday about the science of this to do with the drop in certain hormones but silly me due to peri brain I thought I’d saved it to read later and I hadn’t

 

[humansreallysuck]

I am almost 42, pretty sure in peri. Went to GP as I am struggling with mood swings, hair thinning and loss and terrible terrible night sweats. He said I am far too young and suggested the pill or Prozac and to come back when I am 51. (I insisted on a referral and I am awaiting an appt).

I did start Prozac and cured night sweats completely, but had rendered me an insomniac. Anyway, I saw no dairy can help, any other suggestions to ease the sweating or hair loss? It’s properly affecting me.

Like the others have said definitely go back and see someone else
In my area we have a women’s health centre where we can be referred for all things menopause
The HRT has definitely helped with the excessive sweating im almost 47 but I’ve been dealing with symptoms for YEARS! Don’t suffer in silence like so many of us do .. you are entitled to a decent level of care from your gp.

 

[veronica71]

I've been taking Lions Mane and its definitely helped with the brain fog and remembering words - I stopped taking it for a few weeks and really noticed the difference.

Also I've been taking collagen for 3 weeks now and its definitely helped with the itching

 

[JAR21]

I’m not sure if this is the right thread to post although I think it’s peri related.

My confidence is through the floor at the moment and I’ve got severe paranoia. I’m happily married for almost 30 years but I have an overwhelming sense of dread that my husband doesn’t find me attractive anymore, I’m seeking constant validation about myself and I’m getting on my own nerves and finding it all a bit pathetic tbh.

He hasn’t given me any reason to think this, he’s his usual self. I don’t know if it’s peri, empty nest syndrome or my age, new chapter and all that.

Anyone got any tips to feel more confident about yourself, I think that I would feel better if I loved myself a bit more but not in a ‘I love myself’ sense!

Why don't you tell him what you've just told us and see what he says? Once he realises how you feel, he'll probably be happy to keep letting you know he loves you.

 

[Jemadah]

I'm really struggling. I'm 44 so definitely in perimenopause. I feel so down on myself, and just angry all the time. I suffer from depression anyway and other mental health issues but they are getting worse with the peri. Partner isn't very supportive. Just tells me to control my emotions and deal with it

I empathise. Same here with depression and anxiety anyway.