New baby and post birth advice #5

[wakametango 2.0]

I struggle to stay awake for 10hrs!!

Don’t she is a little monkey today. We’re in a leap, I’ve tried everything! Feeding, changing, playing, pram with sunshade for darkness, cry it out, rocking, bouncing, dummy just checked monitor and daddy had fallen asleep next to her and she’s smiling at the red dots on the baby monitor… you have to laugh!?

10 hours!! she’s 9 weeks as well right? good luck - hopefully she makes up for it tonight…!

Yes 9 weeks tomorrow! We got up at 6am… she had a 20 min nap at 11, ten mins at 1ish and maybe 30 mins at 5
She always sleeps 8pm-6/7/8am so I shouldn’t complain I suppose

 

[OIM]

Sending love, I can’t imagine how worrying it all must be for you. I don’t know about clapping, but my kids never would have waved at anyone as a baby, it definitely wasn’t a thing they did at all (but my kids are very anti social ). If she’s crawling and interacting well with smiles I think that sounds amazing tbh! I always wonder why clapping and waving are a thing we mark as a milestone with babies. Like, why do they need to be able to clap?!

Thank you. I think meeting up with some friends last week with babies a few weeks older than her sent me into a tailspin. I’m going to chat to nursery tomorrow to see if they have any concerned regarding her development

 

[Upintheair83]

Got a migraine for the second day running and baby keeps crying and crying and partner is away with work. Just one of those nights where I just want to get into bed and pretend I'm asleep! Feel like crying myself

 

[Hmmmjustreading]

I’m currently BF and we were constantly on the boob to. All day at some points. It really is like you just need to have your boob out constantly. It’s very difficult in this modern world but it does get easier. We are now every hour sometimes two. The thing im struggling with is a bedtime routine. Everyone is saying bath bed at 7 but we still feed until 9pm sometimes 11pm.
She is coming up to 5 months should I be pushing for a 7 o’clock bedtime?

 

[Definitelyme]

I’m currently BF and we were constantly on the boob to. All day at some points. It really is like you just need to have your boob out constantly. It’s very difficult in this modern world but it does get easier. We are now every hour sometimes two. The thing im struggling with is a bedtime routine. Everyone is saying bath bed at 7 but we still feed until 9pm sometimes 11pm.
She is coming up to 5 months should I be pushing for a 7 o’clock bedtime?

Nope! You do what works for you at this point. I found with my first that her bedtime started later (around 9) and gradually worked itself earlier and earlier. Nothing we did, just as her naps changed during the day she was ready for her long sleep at an earlier time. If you’re content with the way things are there is no need to change it to fit in with other people’s expectations. We don’t bath every night either, the baby just gets popped to bed when he’s tired. Tonight that was 6.30pm, last night it was around 8pm (he is 6 months for reference). You do what works for you and baby x

Got a migraine for the second day running and baby keeps crying and crying and partner is away with work. Just one of those nights where I just want to get into bed and pretend I'm asleep! Feel like crying myself

Oh lovely, that sounds horrendous. Hopefully baby will get some sleep and you can curl up and get some too. Is there anyone who can help you out tomorrow?

Thank you. I think meeting up with some friends last week with babies a few weeks older than her sent me into a tailspin. I’m going to chat to nursery tomorrow to see if they have any concerned regarding her development

My eldest never crawled, and I used to be demented watching babies her age, then younger, progress through the gross motor skills stages perfectly while we were totally stuck. I honestly was driven to the brink by it I was so worried. It’s natural to be worried when you see other babies doing what yours hasn’t gotten to yet, plus your added worries with her epilepsy. But as @WhatABore said they all do it in their own time and I am sure she will be the same

Don’t she is a little monkey today. We’re in a leap, I’ve tried everything! Feeding, changing, playing, pram with sunshade for darkness, cry it out, rocking, bouncing, dummy just checked monitor and daddy had fallen asleep next to her and she’s smiling at the red dots on the baby monitor… you have to laugh!?


Yes 9 weeks tomorrow! We got up at 6am… she had a 20 min nap at 11, ten mins at 1ish and maybe 30 mins at 5
She always sleeps 8pm-6/7/8am so I shouldn’t complain I suppose

But did you try a wee cloth of chloroform over the nose and mouth?! honestly that is mental. She must have some stamina! Better than her dad, clearly!

 

[moimoi]

Got a migraine for the second day running and baby keeps crying and crying and partner is away with work. Just one of those nights where I just want to get into bed and pretend I'm asleep! Feel like crying myself

Aw, sending love your way. I hope tomorrow's better.

I'm having one of those nights too, except the baby is fine and I'm the one who's crying and crying. Just feeling totally overwhelmed, feel like the house is a tit tip (it's not), that I have no time to myself, and that there's always something that needs doing. I looked in the mirror and had a breakdown about my belly. I’m still in pain from my csection, I don’t know if that’s normal after 5 months. I just want to have an evening chilling out doing nothing instead of having to hand express while partner feeds the baby his last feed.

I'm also stressing so much about weaning next month, I struggle so much with food myself so having to come up with 3 meals for someone else is really overwhelming and find time to make bloody food when baby naps 4pm-6pm but only when I'm beside him in bed.

 

[Fruitgums]

I’m currently BF and we were constantly on the boob to. All day at some points. It really is like you just need to have your boob out constantly. It’s very difficult in this modern world but it does get easier. We are now every hour sometimes two. The thing im struggling with is a bedtime routine. Everyone is saying bath bed at 7 but we still feed until 9pm sometimes 11pm.
She is coming up to 5 months should I be pushing for a 7 o’clock bedtime?

Another bed time cluster feeder we are the same, I feed him on and off for 1-3 hours most nights at the start of bed time. I always wonder how others get their babies down at 7 when mines is attached to the boob till 9 at the earliest every night also coming up to 5 months!

 

[Upintheair83]

Aw, sending love your way. I hope tomorrow's better.

I'm having one of those nights too, except the baby is fine and I'm the one who's crying and crying. Just feeling totally overwhelmed, feel like the house is a tit tip (it's not), that I have no time to myself, and that there's always something that needs doing. I looked in the mirror and had a breakdown about my belly. I’m still in pain from my csection, I don’t know if that’s normal after 5 months. I just want to have an evening chilling out doing nothing instead of having to hand express while partner feeds the baby his last feed.

I'm also stressing so much about weaning next month, I struggle so much with food myself so having to come up with 3 meals for someone else is really overwhelming and find time to make bloody food when baby naps 4pm-6pm but only when I'm beside him in bed.

Sending you love hun, it's hard being a mum at times isn't it? We can have a wobble together.
I'm the same as you in regards to weaning. It totally overwhelms me just thinking about it.
But we will get there and we will find our way with it.
I haven't had a c section so I can't say what's normal or not but I'm suffering after a natural birth and all I can say to you is what I say to myself. Its still early days and things will get better. Lots of love to you, and to anyone else who's having one of those nights. Xxx

 

[Babyyoda88]

My baby’s been cluster feeding all night too I’m so tired and my boobs look utterly deflated, don’t know how she’s getting anything out of them

 

[I’mThankyou_]

Just parking me and my powdery boobs here cause we're having a cluster feed too

 

[Hbirdette]

Ladies talk me off the edge. Baby will be 9 months at the weekend and shows no sign of pointing, waving or clapping. I am so worried she’s not developing normally. She’s very social and returns smiles and can commando crawl.

Honestly I wouldn’t worry at all, my 7 month old still struggles to sit unaided and still struggles rolling from front to back he’s a very chilled out baby though so I just think he isn’t really arsed

Got a migraine for the second day running and baby keeps crying and crying and partner is away with work. Just one of those nights where I just want to get into bed and pretend I'm asleep! Feel like crying myself

Oh sending love, I suffer with migraines so I feel your pain. The only thing that ever helps me is sleep. Hope baby settles soon

 

[Hmmmjustreading]

It’s so refreshing to hear and have people share what’s really going on. I think you are right @DefinetelyMaybe! We have to do what works for us and our baby.

I’m here with all the cluster feeding moms. We are all doing so great for our babies.

@Fruitgums it’s always at the back of my mind every night. I’m just going to let that assumption go and let my baby take the lead. They will let us know when they are ready. It’s good to hear I’m not doing anything wrong though!

 

[OIM]

Thank you all ladies for the reassurance. This is the only place I feel I can voice my worries without judgement. I have my rational moments where I remember babies all do different things at different times then my crazy moments where I convince myself her seizures have given her brain damage!

 

[LilyRose1234]

Am I late to the party? We also had a cluster feeding evening, must have been something in the air (or milk ) last night. We also only had 2.5 wakeups (I don’t count the last one, it was like 4 minutes) for the first time in weeks

 

[I’mThankyou_]

Does blinking count as sleep?
Not even joking when I say I don't think the girls came up for air last night. They'd of eaten me if they could of

 

[wakametango 2.0]

As for cluster feeding I thought feeding formula was every 3 hours still so she was on 8-9 bottles a day, checked the tub and she should be on 5 were slowing working our way down and extending feeds but yesterday she had about 7

 

[Definitelyme]

Flip me, cluster feeding frenzy last night! Did anyone manage to get any sleep?

@moimoi my biggest tip for weaning is to remember that babies don’t know what breakfast/lunch/dinner is. So if you have some dinner left over, use it as breakfast! A baby has no concept that eating chicken casserole for breakfast is weird! And an easy lunch is always toast with a variety of toppings (peanut butter, avocado, soft cheese). It all falls in to place. It is one of those things that seems so daunting in the lead up but when you get there isn’t usually half as scary (same with potty training ime!)

 

[WhatABore]

As for cluster feeding I thought feeding formula was every 3 hours still so she was on 8-9 bottles a day, checked the tub and she should be on 5 were slowing working our way down and extending feeds but yesterday she had about 7

Don't worry too much what the tub says. My babies have never followed it.
Feed whatever she needs. You can't over feed a baby as if they don't want/need it, they won't take it
Everleigh at 4 weeks was having 5/6oz bottles every 2-3 hours.
She's balanced out herself now but she clearly needed

 

[wakametango 2.0]

Don't worry too much what the tub says. My babies have never followed it.
Feed whatever she needs. You can't over feed a baby as if they don't want/need it, they won't take it
Everleigh at 4 weeks was having 5/6oz bottles every 2-3 hours.
She's balanced out herself now but she clearly needed

Thank you, good to know! She was happily taking it and isn’t necessarily a big baby?! She’s still in 1 month clothes at 9 weeks we haven’t touched the 0-3 drawer yet

 

[WhatABore]

Thank you, good to know! She was happily taking it and isn’t necessarily a big baby?! She’s still in 1 month clothes at 9 weeks we haven’t touched the 0-3 drawer yet

They won't take more than they need
I was worrying and every time the health visitors asked me how much she drank, I'd tell them expecting them to tell me off or something and they'd always reply with "Oh wow. That's great"
I'd sit there like huh? Alright then

You'll probably find that she'll balance out
She's kind of balanced out a bit more now but still more than the tub says but she always has.
She's almost 7 months and still in 3-6 months clothes with space and she's actually dropped percentiles down to the 20th. Yet she has 8oz bottles every 3 hours still, even during the night.

My second, although big at birth anyway, she was always more than the tub says as well. But she was in 6-9 month clothes at 4 months
But she's 3 and a half now and some 3-4 clothes are still too big for her.

Let her guide you with how much she wants feeding