That sounds shit, I’m sorry. You have my sympathy, my kids also didn’t exactly win the grandparent lottery so I know how frustrating it isI've just been doing exactly the same @Dipdab
I'm feeling really resentful of my parents tonight. They insisted on visiting when baby was 3 days old even though I was recovering from a C-section. I asked them to consider waiting til the following weekend but they got upset. So they only saw us for maybe 4 hours as it was all just too much. They live 400 miles away so it was a long way for them to come for so little time.
That was 8 weeks ago. Not seen them since. Mum has gone on and on about missing him, crying on the phone etc. She had 2 weeks of annual leave left to take but they've decided to have their 3rd holiday abroad this year, rather than coming to see their grandson. I won't hear from her for days and then I'll get a message demanding a "live" photo.Tonight she randomly asked if she could have a photo of him to post on her Facebook (I suppose at least she asks first...). When they came it was like a bloody press conference, she was uploading to her social media all day. Now I've got my dad messaging me asking if he's sleeping through the night yet?! And saying how they didn't have bath seats in their day and they "only" dropped me under the water once.
They are such a weird mix of over-bearing and not giving a shit and it's really getting to me. I had the most wonderful relationship with my grandparents growing up and I just know it's not going to be the same for him. Sorry, just needed to write all of that down!
Thanks lovely, you have mine too. Isn't it so disappointing. I'm certain my mum has narcissistic traits. It's all about how she's a grandma now, the fun showy things, not the actual realities of having a grandchild.That sounds shit, I’m sorry. You have my sympathy, my kids also didn’t exactly win the grandparent lottery so I know how frustrating it is
Parents are weird! My dad buggered off to Spain and remarried and has no intention of coming over to meet baby Waka. I think our generation will be a lot more understanding and open when older, they haven’t really managed to roll with the timesI've just been doing exactly the same @Dipdab
I'm feeling really resentful of my parents tonight. They insisted on visiting when baby was 3 days old even though I was recovering from a C-section. I asked them to consider waiting til the following weekend but they got upset. So they only saw us for maybe 4 hours as it was all just too much. They live 400 miles away so it was a long way for them to come for so little time.
That was 8 weeks ago. Not seen them since. Mum has gone on and on about missing him, crying on the phone etc. She had 2 weeks of annual leave left to take but they've decided to have their 3rd holiday abroad this year, rather than coming to see their grandson. I won't hear from her for days and then I'll get a message demanding a "live" photo.Tonight she randomly asked if she could have a photo of him to post on her Facebook (I suppose at least she asks first...). When they came it was like a bloody press conference, she was uploading to her social media all day. Now I've got my dad messaging me asking if he's sleeping through the night yet?! And saying how they didn't have bath seats in their day and they "only" dropped me under the water once.
They are such a weird mix of over-bearing and not giving a shit and it's really getting to me. I had the most wonderful relationship with my grandparents growing up and I just know it's not going to be the same for him. Sorry, just needed to write all of that down!
So basically she wants a grandchild when it suits her, but has no interest in actually being any help or support? Unbelievable behaviour - or would be if I didn’t see it cropping up so often with so many of our lovely mums. You deserve better, and baby C deserves better too. I’m sorry that it’s not what you’d want for your familyI've just been doing exactly the same @Dipdab
I'm feeling really resentful of my parents tonight. They insisted on visiting when baby was 3 days old even though I was recovering from a C-section. I asked them to consider waiting til the following weekend but they got upset. So they only saw us for maybe 4 hours as it was all just too much. They live 400 miles away so it was a long way for them to come for so little time.
That was 8 weeks ago. Not seen them since. Mum has gone on and on about missing him, crying on the phone etc. She had 2 weeks of annual leave left to take but they've decided to have their 3rd holiday abroad this year, rather than coming to see their grandson. I won't hear from her for days and then I'll get a message demanding a "live" photo.Tonight she randomly asked if she could have a photo of him to post on her Facebook (I suppose at least she asks first...). When they came it was like a bloody press conference, she was uploading to her social media all day. Now I've got my dad messaging me asking if he's sleeping through the night yet?! And saying how they didn't have bath seats in their day and they "only" dropped me under the water once.
They are such a weird mix of over-bearing and not giving a shit and it's really getting to me. I had the most wonderful relationship with my grandparents growing up and I just know it's not going to be the same for him. Sorry, just needed to write all of that down!
What the hell... Yes, I hope we will be. Heaven knows we're already having to break so many patterns of damaging behaviour.Parents are weird! My dad buggered off to Spain and remarried and has no intention of coming over to meet baby Waka. I think our generation will be a lot more understanding and open when older, they haven’t really managed to roll with the times
Exactly this! We are so much more self aware and parent much more mindfullyWhat the hell... Yes, I hope we will be. Heaven knows we're already having to break so many patterns of damaging behaviour.
I don’t get why parents/grandparents feel the need to almost brag about stuff like that, mine do it and it drives me insane. Yes great that you bathed me in a washing up bowl, but I really like the nice non slip baby bath thanksI've just been doing exactly the same @Dipdab
I'm feeling really resentful of my parents tonight. They insisted on visiting when baby was 3 days old even though I was recovering from a C-section. I asked them to consider waiting til the following weekend but they got upset. So they only saw us for maybe 4 hours as it was all just too much. They live 400 miles away so it was a long way for them to come for so little time.
That was 8 weeks ago. Not seen them since. Mum has gone on and on about missing him, crying on the phone etc. She had 2 weeks of annual leave left to take but they've decided to have their 3rd holiday abroad this year, rather than coming to see their grandson. I won't hear from her for days and then I'll get a message demanding a "live" photo.Tonight she randomly asked if she could have a photo of him to post on her Facebook (I suppose at least she asks first...). When they came it was like a bloody press conference, she was uploading to her social media all day. Now I've got my dad messaging me asking if he's sleeping through the night yet?! And saying how they didn't have bath seats in their day and they "only" dropped me under the water once.
They are such a weird mix of over-bearing and not giving a shit and it's really getting to me. I had the most wonderful relationship with my grandparents growing up and I just know it's not going to be the same for him. Sorry, just needed to write all of that down!
I’m also in the shit grandparent club. My in-laws live 10 minutes away, they don’t work and I can count on one hand the number of times they’ve seen little pidge (I went to them too). I’ve fucked them off now, they’re full of drama, total narcs and I don’t have time for them anymore. They’re missing out on a fantastic little girl!Thanks lovely, you have mine too. Isn't it so disappointing. I'm certain my mum has narcissistic traits. It's all about how she's a grandma now, the fun showy things, not the actual realities of having a grandchild.
Aw hey! Thanks for thinking of me.So basically she wants a grandchild when it suits her, but has no interest in actually being any help or support? Unbelievable behaviour - or would be if I didn’t see it cropping up so often with so many of our lovely mums. You deserve better, and baby C deserves better too. I’m sorry that it’s not what you’d want for your familyAre your in laws any better?
This chat of not ideal grandparents makes me think we haven’t heard from @moimoi in ages. Hope all is well
Lovely to hear from youAw hey! Thanks for thinking of me.I’m still around lurking.
Grandparents are still shit at 14 months. Still have a grandma (MIL) and grandad (my dad) who haven’t met him!!! My mum and my FIL have also still only met him once during fleeting visits for a few hours.
I actually unfriended my MIL on Facebook in a fit of rage the other week as she was posting photos on her hols, I was like, how can you go away yet not make time to visit your grandchild. Gonna be awkward when she realises.But fuck it, she didn’t even send him a birthday card.
Not gonna lie but I do get a bit jealous when I see other families with hands on grandparents. My husband and I are definitely feeling a bit burnt out, as much as he won’t admit it. I would love a bit of relief and support!
What was even more hilarious was that she posted a Facebook status at 9pm on his birthday (after clearly just remembering!) wishing him happy birthday (because a 1 year old will truly appreciate that) BUT SPELT HIS NAME WRONG.Lovely to hear from youhope you and baby (toddler?!) moimoi are doing ok?
Ack she didn’t even send him a card? That is a low bar she has failed at, isn’t it?
Sorry you guys still don’t have any support at all, no wonder you feel burnt out
Shit Gparent club here too!!I’m also in the shit grandparent club. My in-laws live 10 minutes away, they don’t work and I can count on one hand the number of times they’ve seen little pidge (I went to them too). I’ve fucked them off now, they’re full of drama, total narcs and I don’t have time for them anymore. They’re missing out on a fantastic little girl!
This is my mum to a T. She loves the fact she’s got a grandson she can brag about on Facebook and she’s physically pushed me out of the way to push my pram - even though it’s like a weapon when she does. But when it comes down to actual changing nappies or soothing him when he cries or playing with him she can’t or won’t do it.Thanks lovely, you have mine too. Isn't it so disappointing. I'm certain my mum has narcissistic traits. It's all about how she's a grandma now, the fun showy things, not the actual realities of having a grandchild.
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