Mrs Hinch #578 All IKEA and no idea

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Mrs Hinch #578 All IKEA and no idea

Amazing title courtesy of @Andioooop
Mark any title suggestions with "thread suggestion", keep them shorter than a size 5 foot and with no swears please.
I've found her increasingly boring this weekend and this recap has been a slog to do, so I apologise for the lack of humour.
The bullshit in summary:
No stairgates on the stairs. But I guess the boys are only allowed to use the back stairs and not the staircase that's only for show.
Alpacas encouraged into the house again.
Cups stored upside down in a drawer so she can look at a drawer full of herself.
IKEA namedropping on the cobbles.
More of that bleeping utility room. It's a boring room for sorting laundry in. Just get over it already.
Stressed hens.
Hoovering up suspicious white powder sawdust in the workshop. Still no actual sign of Al though.
Bumlicking her bestie.
Hobbit claws and t-rex arms.
Filtering photos to oblivion.
Bothering the actual Tescho stylists.
God-awful table setup in the f&b booth.
Seriously though, who is Billy?

Saint Sopha the first of Maldon hasn't a clue.
Vestlife has the tiniest hands.
Fiddle says good things come in small packages.
The BHWT admitted that they've had some sort of conversation with Sophie. At least they're trying to damage control the hun who runs the socials.

Report her to the ASA for not declaring ads: https://www.asa.org.uk/make-a-complaint.html

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What in the name of fuckery is going on at tend farm. Does she think she's Dr Dolittle or something? That is just mental. And her manic laughing to boot. I'm sure she's having some sort of breakdown. Why would you even do this. Her behaviour is just down right barbaric. And she stands there cackling away thinking it's funny? Sophie you need help. And fast.

Show me other people who let alpacas into their home. I doubt you'd find any. Oh and Sopha, have you heard the phrase 'like a bull in a China shop'? Yeh well that very well could be the alpaca in your gaff if you are not careful. It may get spooked by your idiotic laugh, then it would be absolute carnage.
She's a full on 24ct prick, end of.

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What in the name of fuckery is going on at tend farm. Does she think she's Dr Dolittle or something? That is just mental. And her manic laughing to boot. I'm sure she's having some sort of breakdown. Why would you even do this. Her behaviour is just down right barbaric. And she stands there cackling away thinking it's funny? Sophie you need help. And fast.

Show me other people who let alpacas into their home. I doubt you'd find any. Oh and Sopha, have you heard the phrase 'like a bull in a China shop'? Yeh well that very well could be the alpaca in your gaff if you are not careful. It may get spooked by your idiotic laugh, then it would be absolute carnage.
She's a full on 24ct prick, end of.

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What‘s cheese slices still with the paper in between all about? And…
Why is the pantry light in?
 
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They don't look amused that an alpaca has wandered in to get carrots that she's coincidentally left on the word, so that over the top buzzing laugh is just ridiculous.

She's disgusting and thinks she's a right clever cock. Get them out your kitchen 🤢
 
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Just taking a look at the food on the counter. That’s obviously what she believes is a “posh lunch” for her “guests”. It looks like it’s hardly been touched but there’s used plates and cutlery. I’d bet there were more people there than just Billy, Nameless woman and Hinch.

A bit random but I’m always amazed at how she’s happy to eat in front of others. One of my huge ED hang ups is I will only eat in front of a select few people - ie my immediate family. I cannot eat in front of others at all. She has so many hang ups I would have thought that would have been one too.
 
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Queen of clean my arse. Rotten letting that animal wander around the kitchen where food is.

No boundaries whatsoever. It’s those kids I feel sorry for.
 
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She’s lost the bleeping plot. It isn’t funny !! Imagine if they did that when the kids are downstairs whilst she’s eye bleeping herself behind her ring light ! She’s a stupid bleep. Why does she think this is funny. They’re animals’ who belong outside
 
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Omg that is bleeping disgusting that animal in her kitchen 🤮
I’ve said it before and il say it again, she makes out to be some domestic goddess, at least when she first started her Instagram account but she is no clean freak, no one who was genuinely houseproud and was constantly cleaning their house would allow those camels or any other wildlife to walk around the kitchen and they wouldn’t allow their dog to be on the sofa, beds and basically anywhere he wants to be, all this bull crap inch used to come out with about people saying they had the cleanest house in Essex or words to that effect, absolute bull🤮
 
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Won't be so bleeping funny when it's muddy as duck out and they're traipsing it all over the beige floors and walls.
Or when everyone is having to take worming meds.
Or when tit gets broken from them getting spooked or they start "pronking" indoors, hopefully not when a child is around.
 
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Won't be so bleeping funny when it's muddy as duck out and they're traipsing it all over the beige floors and walls.
Or when everyone is having to take worming meds.
Or when tit gets broken from them getting spooked or they start "pronking" indoors, hopefully not when a child is around.
That’s the cleaners’ problem not hers 😂
 
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I don't know what's worse, this alpaca nonsense or the two man team shenanigans from the past. It's all just so awful isn't it? What a life living for the 'gram. I wish she would just get help. Billy and the woman with no name looked mortified!
 
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Omg I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when those 2 stylists got into the car to go home! the look on their faces said it all.
who in their right mind would want to eat something after seeing that in the kitchen 🤢
 
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