Mother in law experiences? Share them! 🤣

[Upintheair83]

Oh trust me. She knows EXACTLY what she’s doing. I’m trying to not say anything due to needing to stay calm as My pregnancy is high risk and I ended up admitted to hospital last week due to my blood pressure. But I can feel myself erupting by the end of the week. She lives over 250 miles away though and my partner doesn’t want to leave me to visit her whilst I’m pregnant incase something happens. So we’re stuck with her here… baby’s due before Christmas and she usually comes down for Christmas. I’m putting my foot down and not allowing that visit. We had 4 losses before this baby. She’s not ruining our bonding time with our newborn. She’s not ruining any of it. This is our baby not hers and for how she’s treating me during the pregnancy she can get fucked to put it frankly.
I just find it crazy how we got along fine before I was pregnant. Now it’s like I don’t exist but you can bet she’ll be up our arses when baby is born.

Oh hun I really sympathise! I'm so glad you are sticking to your guns!!!
My MIL had no interest in my pregnancy, in fact at 39 weeks I went to hers for a bbq- just me and Mt partner and her fella and she didn't speak one word to me, let alone ask how I was. And as soon as baby was born....boom! All over me like a rash!! I'm finding it really hard to keep quiet!! I can't stand how she's changed her tune! But for me thr damage is done and that's jt for me!
I really hope you do stick to your guns and don't let her near you when baby is here. The hardest part so far jv found is when she came round and held my baby. It made my skin crawl and i wanted to grab him back. No one should ever feel like that- so you keep to your plan hun xxx

 

[elchapo]

She came down to visit a few weeks ago. Knew we’d been looking at cots at a store the day before. We chose one, but decided to show me one she wants to buy. But because I didn’t want her to get one on finance that was like £400 (she owes my partner money, is in severe debt as it is anyway and on debt plans) and was bright pink and Massive so not our style. I’ve dreamed about this babies things for years, we tried so long for this baby. I simply said we went to look at cots, chose on yesterday and we pick it up in a few weeks after we’ve decorated babies bedroom properly. She simply say “I wasn’t going to buy one anyway” really snootily and never spoke to me again the rest of the weekend pretty much.
A week later my partner gets a text saying I’m ungrateful and slagging me off loads. Think she thought he wouldn’t tell me but he read the message out as soon as he got it. Then his brother sent a message a few days after that how I’m affecting her mental health and all this tit when I’d not even spoken to her or done anything since she’s like 250 miles away she’s took the complete funny’s with me over it and I just don’t understand. My partner says just ignore her she gets funny all the time but it’s just completely bizzare imo.

I’m so sorry, I did actually pick up on those posts but everyone’s stories seemed to roll into one as I just found this thread then worked my way through it in one (sleepless) night haha. I’m so angry for you. I hope she’s out before the baby is born?

She sounds a LOT like my ex MIL with what you’ve said actually. I just remembered something else she did too. She once texted my boyfriend while I was in the house upstairs with him suggesting that he give me my half of the money we’d paid for the puppy we got together so they could keep him as their family pet and when I went downstairs and confronted her she called me a witch for doing so, but it was SUCH an improvement from the passive aggressive snarkiness I’d dealt with in the past from her! I think if you actually shock these controlling types it does shake some things loose but in your own house, oh boy. She has NO right to be playing mind games.

 

[Tree_]

Oh trust me. She knows EXACTLY what she’s doing. I’m trying to not say anything due to needing to stay calm as My pregnancy is high risk and I ended up admitted to hospital last week due to my blood pressure. But I can feel myself erupting by the end of the week. She lives over 250 miles away though and my partner doesn’t want to leave me to visit her whilst I’m pregnant incase something happens. So we’re stuck with her here… baby’s due before Christmas and she usually comes down for Christmas. I’m putting my foot down and not allowing that visit. We had 4 losses before this baby. She’s not ruining our bonding time with our newborn. She’s not ruining any of it. This is our baby not hers and for how she’s treating me during the pregnancy she can get fucked to put it frankly.
I just find it crazy how we got along fine before I was pregnant. Now it’s like I don’t exist but you can bet she’ll be up our arses when baby is born.

If she tries to visit tell her to duck off. Nasty old bleep

 

[Captainmouse]

If she tries to visit tell her to duck off. Nasty old bleep

Tell her you’ve been pinged and need to isolate

 

[DCICassieStuart]

MIL hasn’t worked out yet that the baby will be taking on my surname . I never changed my surname and I refuse to give this baby a family name that never made me feel a part of their family. Can’t wait for her to go up like a rocket when she hears this

I love this. Good for you! I didn't change my name when I got married and it pisses MIL off no end

 

[TheDuchess]

Oh trust me. She knows EXACTLY what she’s doing. I’m trying to not say anything due to needing to stay calm as My pregnancy is high risk and I ended up admitted to hospital last week due to my blood pressure. But I can feel myself erupting by the end of the week. She lives over 250 miles away though and my partner doesn’t want to leave me to visit her whilst I’m pregnant incase something happens. So we’re stuck with her here… baby’s due before Christmas and she usually comes down for Christmas. I’m putting my foot down and not allowing that visit. We had 4 losses before this baby. She’s not ruining our bonding time with our newborn. She’s not ruining any of it. This is our baby not hers and for how she’s treating me during the pregnancy she can get fucked to put it frankly.
I just find it crazy how we got along fine before I was pregnant. Now it’s like I don’t exist but you can bet she’ll be up our arses when baby is born.

I honestly feel for you having to deal with your MIL being in your home for a week.

Ignoring you in your own home is not on! That is so rude of her. If she can’t build a bridge and get over herself she should have booked a hotel or something.

100% agree with you putting your foot down with her visiting over the Christmas period. Enjoy every moment with your little baby when they arrive, it sounds like you went through a lot to get this precious rainbow baby.

I feel the same as you do that my MIL will also try and be really involved with my baby (my MIL was really involved with her other grandchild so she’s in for one hell of a shock come January when I’m due). Stick to your guns and do what is best for you and your family x

I love this. Good for you! I didn't change my name when I got married and it pisses MIL off no end

Oh god I feel like I’ve met my people

When my husband announced we were engaged my SIL asked (in front of my MIL) is Duchess changing her surname or hyphenating? Husband said neither, why would she change her name? God I love him

SIL & MIL were apparently quite stunned especially as SIL was getting married not long after us and would be hyphenating her name.

SIL then says what about if you have kids? Husband turned round and said well you’ll find out if we do have kids! Cue MIL sat speechless

At her daughters wedding she couldn’t bring herself to use my surname on my place card, just my first name

I honestly thought the surname would have been brought up by MIL at the weekend but she was too busy hijacking a pregnancy announcement

Oh well it’s her birthday in the next couple of months, might announce that little bit of information then

Revenge is sweet mother fudger

 

[Ellegee]

You really couldn’t make this tit up
They’ve all just gone out for the day. I’m staying home because pregnant, spd so can’t walk for ages.
She came back in to say bye to the dog and the cat.
Completed ignored still.
Partner hasn’t said a word to her either. We’ll not that I’m aware of. I know he doesn’t want to say anything around the kiddies but I took myself off to be last night because I don’t want to be around the awful atmosphere she brings.

She would not be welcome in my home ever. Your partner needs to grow a pair & speak up for you, I wouldn’t even care if it was in front of the kids at this stage, they can see what’s going on & it’s important they see Dad standing up for their mam

 

[Bizziebody]

I’m a mil, I cannot imagine ever behaving like some of these stupid rude women. Maybe it is different for me because I have a son in law.

 

[SonicTheSpikeyThing]

She would not be welcome in my home ever. Your partner needs to grow a pair & speak up for you, I wouldn’t even care if it was in front of the kids at this stage, they can see what’s going on & it’s important they see Dad standing up for their mam

I don’t think he’s seeing it how I’m seeing it if you know what I mean? He was outside with the kids when she came back into say bye to the cat and dog.
I went to bed early last night and he stayed downstairs with her so we’ve not really had time to speak as they were off out early this morning. Will pull him for a chat tonight I’ve packed any overnight bag and my friends said I can go and stay at hers tonight if I need it. Which I’m actually looking forward to if I do

 

[Captainmouse]

I don’t think he’s seeing it how I’m seeing it if you know what I mean? He was outside with the kids when she came back into say bye to the cat and dog.
I went to bed early last night and he stayed downstairs with her so we’ve not really had time to speak as they were off out early this morning. Will pull him for a chat tonight I’ve packed any overnight bag and my friends said I can go and stay at hers tonight if I need it. Which I’m actually looking forward to if I do

I would go anyway

 

[hypoharpy]

I don’t know what’s more shocking or upsetting: the stories of awful mother in laws or the responses from the son’s who don’t see a problem!

The son's are cowards. If you've got a partner who will be on your side and will defend you, then you've struck gold. Sadly most of us haven't.

 

[Kirstyroo]

I think I was spoilt with my ex boyfriends mum. She was so warm and understanding. We still meet up now and she is just the kindest woman. My new boyfriends mum is… cold as ice 90% of the time. We have a son together, a few months old. I’ve tried so hard to involve her as much as possible. My mum lives far away so I really try to have a good relationship with his mum. We go to her house almost every Sunday. God forbid we miss one because we’re doing our own thing though! And if we ever dare ask her to come to our house instead… oh what a stress that is for her and don’t we hear about it! Anyway, weekend just gone we were shattered, she had to come to us. Said she would arrive at 5.30 after a massive palava about how stressful it would be for her to make the time to come, put baby down for nap at 4.30… she arrived 2 mins later! Of course the baby is now having cuddles and kisses and is overtired 30 mins later. Starts screaming.. I say ah I should put him down for a sleep otherwise bed time will be tricky (bare in mind bedtime is already being pushed back now to accommodate her which she is well aware of). She just starts talking to my boyfriend, ignoring me, “shall we give him his dummy” - I said, I only give it to him when he’s going to sleep, so if I can go and put him for a nap I’ll give it to him - to my boyfriend ignoring me “let’s give him his dummy” - no!! she always does little things like this.. ignores me and acts like my boyfriend is the only parent. Often if my son stirs “do you want your daddy? You want daddy don’t you?” And will only ever hand my son back to him, never me, even if I am stood there and my boyfriend is busy. She is now off work for 6 weeks. I said “I can pop round during the weekdays now to see you more, which is easier to fit in than on the weekends” her reply “I’ve got a lot on in the holidays. I always tell you to come around, Im not sure why you don’t bother” - like??? You work full time?? I see you every Sunday?? When else am I supposed to see you when the baby is in bed at 7pm every night! I just find her so uninviting and she makes me feel like I am just a vessel that carried her grandson. Of course my boyfriend is a massive mummy’s boy so you can’t say a word about it. I send her videos and photos of my son saying he can’t wait to see you etc etc, she will ignore them but ring my boyfriend every sodding day saying “oh I saw the photos you sent” - no he didn’t send them, I did! You’d never get updates on your grandson if I didn’t bloody send them so you could at least acknowledge that I’m trying!

She’s also one of those who makes it painfully obvious she loved his ex girlfriend (even though she cheated on him!)

I don’t miss my ex boyfriend one bit, but my god I miss his mum SO much!! She is also better with my son than current boyfriends mum (not that he knows my ex mil cuddles him when I meet up with her )

I think I was spoilt with my ex boyfriends mum. She was so warm and understanding. We still meet up now and she is just the kindest woman. My new boyfriends mum is… cold as ice 90% of the time. We have a son together, a few months old. I’ve tried so hard to involve her as much as possible. My mum lives far away so I really try to have a good relationship with his mum. We go to her house almost every Sunday. God forbid we miss one because we’re doing our own thing though! And if we ever dare ask her to come to our house instead… oh what a stress that is for her and don’t we hear about it! Anyway, weekend just gone we were shattered, she had to come to us. Said she would arrive at 5.30 after a massive palava about how stressful it would be for her to make the time to come, put baby down for nap at 4.30… she arrived 2 mins later! Of course the baby is now having cuddles and kisses and is overtired 30 mins later. Starts screaming.. I say ah I should put him down for a sleep otherwise bed time will be tricky (bare in mind bedtime is already being pushed back now to accommodate her which she is well aware of). She just starts talking to my boyfriend, ignoring me, “shall we give him his dummy” - I said, I only give it to him when he’s going to sleep, so if I can go and put him for a nap I’ll give it to him - to my boyfriend ignoring me “let’s give him his dummy” - no!! she always does little things like this.. ignores me and acts like my boyfriend is the only parent. Often if my son stirs “do you want your daddy? You want daddy don’t you?” And will only ever hand my son back to him, never me, even if I am stood there and my boyfriend is busy. She is now off work for 6 weeks. I said “I can pop round during the weekdays now to see you more, which is easier to fit in than on the weekends” her reply “I’ve got a lot on in the holidays. I always tell you to come around, Im not sure why you don’t bother” - like??? You work full time?? I see you every Sunday?? When else am I supposed to see you when the baby is in bed at 7pm every night! I just find her so uninviting and she makes me feel like I am just a vessel that carried her grandson. Of course my boyfriend is a massive mummy’s boy so you can’t say a word about it. I send her videos and photos of my son saying he can’t wait to see you etc etc, she will ignore them but ring my boyfriend every sodding day saying “oh I saw the photos you sent” - no he didn’t send them, I did! You’d never get updates on your grandson if I didn’t bloody send them so you could at least acknowledge that I’m trying!

She’s also one of those who makes it painfully obvious she loved his ex girlfriend (even though she cheated on him!)

I don’t miss my ex boyfriend one bit, but my god I miss his mum SO much!! She is also better with my son than current boyfriends mum (not that he knows my ex mil cuddles him when I meet up with her )

Wow this is much longer than I realised. I guess I really needed to get it off my chest

 

[elchapo]

I think I was spoilt with my ex boyfriends mum. She was so warm and understanding. We still meet up now and she is just the kindest woman. My new boyfriends mum is… cold as ice 90% of the time. We have a son together, a few months old. I’ve tried so hard to involve her as much as possible. My mum lives far away so I really try to have a good relationship with his mum. We go to her house almost every Sunday. God forbid we miss one because we’re doing our own thing though! And if we ever dare ask her to come to our house instead… oh what a stress that is for her and don’t we hear about it! Anyway, weekend just gone we were shattered, she had to come to us. Said she would arrive at 5.30 after a massive palava about how stressful it would be for her to make the time to come, put baby down for nap at 4.30… she arrived 2 mins later! Of course the baby is now having cuddles and kisses and is overtired 30 mins later. Starts screaming.. I say ah I should put him down for a sleep otherwise bed time will be tricky (bare in mind bedtime is already being pushed back now to accommodate her which she is well aware of). She just starts talking to my boyfriend, ignoring me, “shall we give him his dummy” - I said, I only give it to him when he’s going to sleep, so if I can go and put him for a nap I’ll give it to him - to my boyfriend ignoring me “let’s give him his dummy” - no!! she always does little things like this.. ignores me and acts like my boyfriend is the only parent. Often if my son stirs “do you want your daddy? You want daddy don’t you?” And will only ever hand my son back to him, never me, even if I am stood there and my boyfriend is busy. She is now off work for 6 weeks. I said “I can pop round during the weekdays now to see you more, which is easier to fit in than on the weekends” her reply “I’ve got a lot on in the holidays. I always tell you to come around, Im not sure why you don’t bother” - like??? You work full time?? I see you every Sunday?? When else am I supposed to see you when the baby is in bed at 7pm every night! I just find her so uninviting and she makes me feel like I am just a vessel that carried her grandson. Of course my boyfriend is a massive mummy’s boy so you can’t say a word about it. I send her videos and photos of my son saying he can’t wait to see you etc etc, she will ignore them but ring my boyfriend every sodding day saying “oh I saw the photos you sent” - no he didn’t send them, I did! You’d never get updates on your grandson if I didn’t bloody send them so you could at least acknowledge that I’m trying!

She’s also one of those who makes it painfully obvious she loved his ex girlfriend (even though she cheated on him!)

I don’t miss my ex boyfriend one bit, but my god I miss his mum SO much!! She is also better with my son than current boyfriends mum (not that he knows my ex mil cuddles him when I meet up with her )




Wow this is much longer than I realised. I guess I really needed to get it off my chest

I’m seething for you. I really think you need to cut contact with this nasty woman. I think this story has actually bugged me more than any of the others. She’ll drive a wedge between you and that Mummy’s Boy and she knows she will. I’m glad you have your ex MIL still xxx

 

[disneys]

Hello ladies , I need to vent about my MIL

for context , we have had a really good relationship .. she has two sons and I am the first “wife” of the family and have been with my husband for near enough ten years … she’s always been a little overbearing but recently , this year really , she has been ridiculous !!

in January , she and my FIL moved so instead of being a 30 min drive from us , they are now a 15 min drive … we were at first thrilled , we have a 2 year old and she’s useful childcare ! I started a degree with the open university for a career change last year so it is really helpful to have her so close so I can drop my son off and do some study alone for a few hours at home a couple of times a week !

at Christmas she got really funny with us because we decided to abide by the Tier 4 rules at the time (we are in Kent) and not see anyone for Christmas … my BIL and his daughter and fiancée decided to break the rules and go to my MIL’s anyway , but we decided to play it safe and just have Xmas alone … she went ballistic at us !! It was the first time she’d ever done this but she basically told us she didn’t know how many Christmases she has left and wanted to spend it with her grandson (she is fighting fit and only in her early sixties so a very strange comment)

she had another episode similar to this on my son’s second birthday at the beginning of this month , we had invited her for an afternoon tea along with my husbands family and some friends in the garden the day after my son’s birthday … my husband was working on my soN’s actual birthday which was a Friday and he wouldn’t know the difference so we wanted to celebrate on the Saturday instead … well , she lost it ! Saying she NEEDED to see my son on his actual birthday … in the end they came round on the Friday night after hubby caved … they saw my son for half an hour , then he had to go to bed and they stayed for THREE HOURS and we had to order a chinese

it’s escalated this week … my parents live in Hampshire and my other family (sister , uncles and aunts) live in Dorset … we decided to take a 2 week trip and spend 1 week in Hampshire with my parents and 1 week in Dorset with the rest of the family … I told MIL about this yesterday when I picked my son up from her house and she lost it again !!! Said she couldn’t deal with not seeing my son for 2 weeks , begging to come , accused me of keeping it from her (We only finalsidf the details on Friday so we kept it for her for 3 days and that’s just because we didn’t see her !) , and said I was keeping her grandson away from her

my son sees her 2-3 times a week AT LEAST , and hasn’t seen my mum since October last year because of the pandemic !!

there must be something causing this but I have no idea what … we are so good to them , we have them round all the time , we invite them out on days out , we make sure they are so involved in my son’s life and my husband would be there in a flash if there was a crisis … but we also need a break from them at times , we need to see my family and we’re even planning on going to America for 2 weeks next year … how will she cope then !!

has anyone experienced this ? It’s a bizarre shift in behaviour in the last 8 months and we just can’t work out why she’s doing this all of a sudden … it is really upsetting for my husband !

 

[TheDuchess]

Hello ladies , I need to vent about my MIL

for context , we have had a really good relationship .. she has two sons and I am the first “wife” of the family and have been with my husband for near enough ten years … she’s always been a little overbearing but recently , this year really , she has been ridiculous !!

in January , she and my FIL moved so instead of being a 30 min drive from us , they are now a 15 min drive … we were at first thrilled , we have a 2 year old and she’s useful childcare ! I started a degree with the open university for a career change last year so it is really helpful to have her so close so I can drop my son off and do some study alone for a few hours at home a couple of times a week !

at Christmas she got really funny with us because we decided to abide by the Tier 4 rules at the time (we are in Kent) and not see anyone for Christmas … my BIL and his daughter and fiancée decided to break the rules and go to my MIL’s anyway , but we decided to play it safe and just have Xmas alone … she went ballistic at us !! It was the first time she’d ever done this but she basically told us she didn’t know how many Christmases she has left and wanted to spend it with her grandson (she is fighting fit and only in her early sixties so a very strange comment)

she had another episode similar to this on my son’s second birthday at the beginning of this month , we had invited her for an afternoon tea along with my husbands family and some friends in the garden the day after my son’s birthday … my husband was working on my soN’s actual birthday which was a Friday and he wouldn’t know the difference so we wanted to celebrate on the Saturday instead … well , she lost it ! Saying she NEEDED to see my son on his actual birthday … in the end they came round on the Friday night after hubby caved … they saw my son for half an hour , then he had to go to bed and they stayed for THREE HOURS and we had to order a chinese

it’s escalated this week … my parents live in Hampshire and my other family (sister , uncles and aunts) live in Dorset … we decided to take a 2 week trip and spend 1 week in Hampshire with my parents and 1 week in Dorset with the rest of the family … I told MIL about this yesterday when I picked Hugo up from her house and she lost it again !!! Said she couldn’t deal with not seeing Hugo for 2 weeks , begging to come , accused me of keeping it from her (We only finalsidf the details on Friday so we kept it for her for 3 days and that’s just because we didn’t see her !) , and said I was keeping her grandson away from her

my son sees her 2-3 times a week AT LEAST , and hasn’t seen my mum since October last year because of the pandemic !!

there must be something causing this but I have no idea what … we are so good to them , we have them round all the time , we invite them out on days out , we make sure they are so involved in my son’s life and my husband would be there in a flash if there was a crisis … but we also need a break from them at times , we need to see my family and we’re even planning on going to America for 2 weeks next year … how will she cope then !!

has anyone experienced this ? It’s a bizarre shift in behaviour in the last 8 months and we just can’t work out why she’s doing this all of a sudden … it is really upsetting for my husband !

Omg that’s not on! None of that behaviour is okay. Has your husband spoken to her about how overbearing she has become? If not he really needs to.

How she can react like that when your own mum hasn’t been able to see your little one because of the pandemic is beyond belief!

 

[disneys]

Omg that’s not on! None of that behaviour is okay. Has your husband spoken to her about how overbearing she has become? If not he really needs to.

How she can react like that when your own mum hasn’t been able to see your little one because of the pandemic is beyond belief!

Husband has just floated the idea of inviting her round tomorrow night for dinner and telling her we need this behaviour to stop , he’s just had a tirade from her over text because she was meant to be having our son on Thursday but husband is a teacher so is on summer holidays and wants to take him out on Thursday while I study so told her she could have the day off and she’s gone nuts !

I’d like to get FIL on his own and ask him about it , he’s a quiet , long suffering chap but really lovely .. I wonder if he knows why she’s suddenly become so overbearing

 

[Lulu Goss]

Husband has just floated the idea of inviting her round tomorrow night for dinner and telling her we need this behaviour to stop , he’s just had a tirade from her over text because she was meant to be having our son on Thursday but husband is a teacher so is on summer holidays and wants to take him out on Thursday while I study so told her she could have the day off and she’s gone nuts !

I’d like to get FIL on his own and ask him about it , he’s a quiet , long suffering chap but really lovely .. I wonder if he knows why she’s suddenly become so overbearing

That sounds absolutely exhausting! Your baby is YOUR baby, she doesn’t need to be that involved in absolutely everything… at least your husband realises how odd her behaviour is too, speaking to her about it sounds like a good idea before she gets any worse.

 

[Mrs Cucumber]

Hello ladies , I need to vent about my MIL

for context , we have had a really good relationship .. she has two sons and I am the first “wife” of the family and have been with my husband for near enough ten years … she’s always been a little overbearing but recently , this year really , she has been ridiculous !!

in January , she and my FIL moved so instead of being a 30 min drive from us , they are now a 15 min drive … we were at first thrilled , we have a 2 year old and she’s useful childcare ! I started a degree with the open university for a career change last year so it is really helpful to have her so close so I can drop my son off and do some study alone for a few hours at home a couple of times a week !

at Christmas she got really funny with us because we decided to abide by the Tier 4 rules at the time (we are in Kent) and not see anyone for Christmas … my BIL and his daughter and fiancée decided to break the rules and go to my MIL’s anyway , but we decided to play it safe and just have Xmas alone … she went ballistic at us !! It was the first time she’d ever done this but she basically told us she didn’t know how many Christmases she has left and wanted to spend it with her grandson (she is fighting fit and only in her early sixties so a very strange comment)

she had another episode similar to this on my son’s second birthday at the beginning of this month , we had invited her for an afternoon tea along with my husbands family and some friends in the garden the day after my son’s birthday … my husband was working on my soN’s actual birthday which was a Friday and he wouldn’t know the difference so we wanted to celebrate on the Saturday instead … well , she lost it ! Saying she NEEDED to see my son on his actual birthday … in the end they came round on the Friday night after hubby caved … they saw my son for half an hour , then he had to go to bed and they stayed for THREE HOURS and we had to order a chinese

it’s escalated this week … my parents live in Hampshire and my other family (sister , uncles and aunts) live in Dorset … we decided to take a 2 week trip and spend 1 week in Hampshire with my parents and 1 week in Dorset with the rest of the family … I told MIL about this yesterday when I picked Hugo up from her house and she lost it again !!! Said she couldn’t deal with not seeing Hugo for 2 weeks , begging to come , accused me of keeping it from her (We only finalsidf the details on Friday so we kept it for her for 3 days and that’s just because we didn’t see her !) , and said I was keeping her grandson away from her

my son sees her 2-3 times a week AT LEAST , and hasn’t seen my mum since October last year because of the pandemic !!

there must be something causing this but I have no idea what … we are so good to them , we have them round all the time , we invite them out on days out , we make sure they are so involved in my son’s life and my husband would be there in a flash if there was a crisis … but we also need a break from them at times , we need to see my family and we’re even planning on going to America for 2 weeks next year … how will she cope then !!

has anyone experienced this ? It’s a bizarre shift in behaviour in the last 8 months and we just can’t work out why she’s doing this all of a sudden … it is really upsetting for my husband !

You might want to edit this if you can as you have used your child's name might make you identifiable

 

[Base2019]

I think a lot of the MIL issues come from the fact that they don’t like another woman coming into their sons lives and making them happy. Cooking for them and looking after them etc… I’m 99.9% sure it all stems from jealously! And they behave like arseholes to see who their sons pick. One time we were at my MIL house and we were pushed for time! She tried to get Us to stay for dinner. Hubby said Base2019 already has dinner stuff prepped at home but thank you anyway and she turned out infront of me and said would you not rather my dinner than Base2019. I was actually livid. My own mother would never dream of behaving in such a way

 

[TheDuchess]

Husband has just floated the idea of inviting her round tomorrow night for dinner and telling her we need this behaviour to stop , he’s just had a tirade from her over text because she was meant to be having our son on Thursday but husband is a teacher so is on summer holidays and wants to take him out on Thursday while I study so told her she could have the day off and she’s gone nuts !

I’d like to get FIL on his own and ask him about it , he’s a quiet , long suffering chap but really lovely .. I wonder if he knows why she’s suddenly become so overbearing

Wow

Your MIL is acting like she has a lot of say over her grandson. I’d be cutting back on the amount of time she has been seeing him. I am so glad to hear that your husband has been supportive and wants to call her out on her behaviour.

Having at pop at you both for “keeping her grandchild” from her is not on. This is your baby and she has zero say in anything, hopefully your FIL is seeing what you are both having to deal with.

Might be worth having your husband have a quick chat with FIL before the big meltdown your MIL will inevitably throw when you have the chat with her. That way FIL can hopefully help stand up for you both against her.

Be prepared though I reckon she’ll throw the works at you, tears and tantrums. Do. Not. Cave! Be strong

I think a lot of the MIL issues come from the fact that they don’t like another woman coming into their sons lives and making them happy. Cooking for them and looking after them etc… I’m 99.9% sure it all stems from jealously! And they behave like arseholes to see who their sons pick. One time we were at my MIL house and we were pushed for time! She tried to get Us to stay for dinner. Hubby said Base2019 already has dinner stuff prepped at home but thank you anyway and she turned out infront of me and said would you not rather my dinner than Base2019. I was actually livid. My own mother would never dream of behaving in such a way

Agree it’s jealousy and the fear of loosing them. The thing is that if they didn’t go bat tit crazy at the partner then they would probably have a much more rewarding relationship with both the son and their partner. Actually be welcomed to visit etc

My husbands mother is divorced and raised him and his sister by herself. She did a great job but by god the woman has been relentless towards me since she found out he was dating me. She was a treat on my wedding day