5 minutes down. She’s shitting me. Already.
She’s enjoying slowing down in quarantine. Like that’s even possible. She’s slower than a geriatric slug in a snow storm. Wasn’t she one of life’s sprinters yesterday.
She doesn’t like work meetings mid-way through the day as it disrupts her flow. Ever the professional. Flow of frickin what? Ordering fauxtiques, cooking beige food, googling life-affirming quotes.
She’s not one to look in the view finder, but she’s just noticed how nice her ‘soft glam’ makeup is. Well we’ll just discount the 576,000 times you’ve eye fucked yourself then.
And as for the brows. The overgrown hairy sluggish mo-fo brows. No-one can be that lazy. No-one. Definitely not from the girl who refused to go to London because of a bad skin day. Is it an attempt to appear more relatable to her viewers that she’s like one of them. Or is her merch now brow related and then like magic it’s her new game changer, her life saviour. She’s only about the coin after all. Slow clap. Did. Not. See. That. Coming.