Loneliness

[Libbylulu]

I saw on another thread someone asking for advice/ ideas regarding loneliness. It can affect anyone, especially after the last year. And my own experience it seems to be more difficult to reach out as my children are grown and my friends still have younger kids.
So I thought I’d start this thread to help with ideas or just dump loneliness feelings

 

[Purrrrrrr]

Lovely idea for a thread
Loneliness is a strange thing. I live on my own and have done for 25 years and not one day where I felt lonely. But every time I live with people I always feel very alone and lonely. I love people very much and like having company. I just cannot live with them. I wonder if this is rare or if others feel the same.

 

[Barbie2020]

I struggle with loneliness even though I have people around me. My partner works away all week but I do see my mum and dad a couple of times. I have friends but see them once in a blue moon as I actually prefer my own company, I think it’s my depression that makes me feel lonely as it makes me paranoid people don’t actually like me and I will shut myself away .

thinking of everyone who feels lonely and struggles. I sometimes feel less lonely chatting on tattle. Even though I don’t actually know anyone the interaction is nice and don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not

 

[Lauren-1996]

I moved to a different city to live with my partner, so I don’t have any friends or any of my own family here. Im on maternity leave and my partner is at work full time, when he’s not at work he likes to do his own thing. It gets very lonely being stuck at home 24/7 with two young children and no family or friends near by.

 

[1001 others]

I moved to a different city to live with my partner, so I don’t have any friends or any of my own family here. Im on maternity leave and my partner is at work full time, when he’s not at work he likes to do his own thing. It gets very lonely being stuck at home 24/7 with two young children and no family or friends near by.

Do you belong to any mother's groups?

 

[watermelon sugar]

I moved to a different city to live with my partner, so I don’t have any friends or any of my own family here. Im on maternity leave and my partner is at work full time, when he’s not at work he likes to do his own thing. It gets very lonely being stuck at home 24/7 with two young children and no family or friends near by.

I'm the same, just with one child, I've moved to the town my boyfriend is from and I'm a stay at home Mum. Don't have any friends round here and none of my family. It gets very lonely

 

[Kim Mild]

Loneliness can be hardest when you are surrounded by people.

People sympathise that the elderly/ widowed people might be lonely but I think so many working age adults feel lonely.

 

[Purrrrrrr]

I moved to a different city to live with my partner, so I don’t have any friends or any of my own family here. Im on maternity leave and my partner is at work full time, when he’s not at work he likes to do his own thing. It gets very lonely being stuck at home 24/7 with two young children and no family or friends near by.

I read this when you first posted and had to leave the thread. Really this is not good, not good at all. is he a single man or a man with a family? he should be making your transition to another place smooth not bumpy.
Once the nice weather is here get yourself and the kids to the parks with a picnic or to soft play and make yourself some friends. I know it's not an easy thing to do but in reality its easier done than said, kids make friends very easy and the parents naturally start to chat. Since I started to be my grandchildren's childminder I have made some lovely friends and all because of the children making friends.

I will butt out now it's just this and @watermelon sugar post upset me. I know exactly what its like xxx

 

[Cats_eyes]

I don't really have much to input, I spend a lot of time with my dog. I'm a plane away from family. I have friends living here, my bf works away often but a lot of the time prefer I do prefer my own (and the dogs) company. Tattle probably helped a lot tbh but podcasts too!! It's not really loneliness that's bothers me. More so silence. So normally I'm listening to crime/celeb/interview podcasts in the background.

 

[Lauren-1996]

Thank you everyone. I used to go to playgroups with my first but haven’t been able to with the newborn due to covid, but hopefully get back into it soon. Sounds daft but I find coming on here really helpful X

 

[Libbylulu]

I live overseas and my husband travels a lot ( not so much in the last year), my kids have left home. I go through waves of loneliness, I find Tattle helps as it’s communication with people. Some weeks I can go days without speaking out loud with others. I have friends but either they are busy or possibly they could be feeling the same. Some weeks I try to get people together and then other weeks it’s too much effort. I think covid has also bashed the enthusiasm or effort out of everyone.

 

[mochibean]

Very lonely. Moved to the other side of the city away from my friends, don't really know anyone and I just feel rubbish. Sick of staying in the house scrolling through tiktok and watching YT videos all day. Feels like a waste especially now we can actually go out.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

I'm the same, just with one child, I've moved to the town my boyfriend is from and I'm a stay at home Mum. Don't have any friends round here and none of my family. It gets very lonely

I don’t have any advice to give but just wanted to say that you bring a lot of laughs with your memes! I know that doesn’t help the slightest with how you feel but I appreciate what you bring to Tattle

 

[watermelon sugar]

I don’t have any advice to give but just wanted to say that you bring a lot of laughs with your memes! I know that doesn’t help the slightest with how you feel but I appreciate what you bring to Tattle

Stop it that is so sweet! Thank you

 

[CLittleworld]

I relate to everyone’s posts so much I’m a single mum to a teen I have family close by but I’m the only single friend etc so I don’t get invited to many places I work in the office now but I worked from home for a year and I’d sometimes go 10/11 days without seeing anyone if my daughter was at her dads makes you realise who your real friends are !
My work is an entirely male environment too !
Iv been crocheting so I’m gonna try and join a circle

 

[fruitcake_1]

i also relate to feeling lonely.

ever since school i’ve always been the “discardable friend” or the least preferred in the group if that makes sense and i’ve never understood why.

After having so called friends who would leave me all alone in nightclubs and other horrible situations in my younger years i’ve become somewhat of a recluse, would prefer to just be in my own company than bother with people and end up feeling crap about myself.

My partner completely understands my social anxiety and doesn’t force me in to social situations if i’m not feeling up to it, which i appreciate!

But I do feel really lonely, when he goes out to visit his friends I’d love nothing more than to go visit friends too but I don’t have any.

I’m in my mid-late twenties and work in an office. I’m always the go to person in my team for advice and thought I got along well with everyone until today when I seen on SM all the women met up for a drink but didn’t invite me along with another woman (who I know they’re not fussed on).

It just seems like good friends are hard to come by these days which is a shame and it doesn’t help that i’m really shy so making new friends seems impossible

does anyone have any advice on making friends when suffering with social anxiety?

 

[Lauren-1996]

i also relate to feeling lonely.

ever since school i’ve always been the “discardable friend” or the least preferred in the group if that makes sense and i’ve never understood why.

After having so called friends who would leave me all alone in nightclubs and other horrible situations in my younger years i’ve become somewhat of a recluse, would prefer to just be in my own company than bother with people and end up feeling crap about myself.

My partner completely understands my social anxiety and doesn’t force me in to social situations if i’m not feeling up to it, which i appreciate!

But I do feel really lonely, when he goes out to visit his friends I’d love nothing more than to go visit friends too but I don’t have any.

I’m in my mid-late twenties and work in an office. I’m always the go to person in my team for advice and thought I got along well with everyone until today when I seen on SM all the women met up for a drink but didn’t invite me along with another woman (who I know they’re not fussed on).

It just seems like good friends are hard to come by these days which is a shame and it doesn’t help that i’m really shy so making new friends seems impossible

does anyone have any advice on making friends when suffering with social anxiety?

I get this. It’s annoying because you feel like you’d make such a good friend, yet no one wants to be good friends with you, right? I get on with everyone at work etc, but don’t have anyone that I see/talk to outside of work. I’m 25 so similar age I guess? Why don’t you go out with your boyfriend and see if some of his mates have girlfriends? You may feel more comfortable having your boyfriend there too, also alcohol helps

 

[Melissa25xo]

i also relate to feeling lonely.

ever since school i’ve always been the “discardable friend” or the least preferred in the group if that makes sense and i’ve never understood why.

After having so called friends who would leave me all alone in nightclubs and other horrible situations in my younger years i’ve become somewhat of a recluse, would prefer to just be in my own company than bother with people and end up feeling crap about myself.

My partner completely understands my social anxiety and doesn’t force me in to social situations if i’m not feeling up to it, which i appreciate!

But I do feel really lonely, when he goes out to visit his friends I’d love nothing more than to go visit friends too but I don’t have any.

I’m in my mid-late twenties and work in an office. I’m always the go to person in my team for advice and thought I got along well with everyone until today when I seen on SM all the women met up for a drink but didn’t invite me along with another woman (who I know they’re not fussed on).

It just seems like good friends are hard to come by these days which is a shame and it doesn’t help that i’m really shy so making new friends seems impossible

does anyone have any advice on making friends when suffering with social anxiety?

I feel like I could have wrote this! My ‘best friend’ left me in a nightclub once and got a taxi to the other side of town with her other mate. The same friend arranged a meal for her 21st when I asked about my invite her response was ‘only school friends allowed’ and I’d met her in college so that was me excluded, I was crushed. From that moment I don’t really bother that much with anyone! I don’t have any advice but I understand were your coming from and your not alone

 

[Marie95]

Very lonely. Moved to the other side of the city away from my friends, don't really know anyone and I just feel rubbish. Sick of staying in the house scrolling through tiktok and watching YT videos all day. Feels like a waste especially now we can actually go out.

I hope you're ok I'm the same, I moved 3.5 hours away from all my friends/family and I only know my husbands friends, don't have any of my own. All my friends are going out together and I have to see it on instagram, I hate it, I'm 25 with no children I feel like I'm wasting my weekends!

 

[indigomoon]

Have you thought about pen-palling? Or how about joining a local walking group? Andy's Man Club has lots of groups and projects on the go aimed at reducing loneliness too (not exclusively for men). I would also check out some volunteering opportunities in your local community.