Lily Pebbles #18 Thinking about baby number 2, hey Rich, pull the tampons out of MY loo

[CloudMama]

I recently heard someone say "people will keep the style from the phase in their life they felt most comfortable in", for example women who were teenagers in the 80s and still rock the poofy hair. I think Lily is doing something similar, but you can see it more in the way she behaves than how she styles herself.
To me it's obvious she wishes she could still live like the she did when she was a teenager, hence the neverending stories about her youth, on the podcast, in videos, etc. She seems to have had a carefree youth, spoiled as the youngest child, no committments and obligations. I feel like her family expected her to get married, buy a house, have kids and she did just that because her two sisters have done the same thing. I don't doubt she also wanted these things, but had a very unrealistic idea of how they would go.

She likes the IDEA of being married, but can't deal with someone being in close quarters to her 24/7.
She still fries the everliving daylights out of her hair because that's the way she did it in her teenage years and can't emotionally let go and adopt healthier habits.
She likes the IDEA of being a mother, but didn't expect all of the negatives that come with it and freaks out if Grey doesn't behave the way she wants. The incessant stories about her making a mess and toys being everywhere and even building huge shelves to erase every trace of a kid living there.
To be honest I'd be miserable too if the way of living that I've been taught is the best, the one and only doesn't actually turn out to be "the one". I think she slowly started to realize that when her daughter was born and it wasn't all daisies and sunshine and wishes herself back to when she wasn't feeling so miserable, like in her teenage years.

I know she can be insufferably moany but sometimes I understand why she acts the way she does, even if I absolutely don't feel sorry for her. I don't throw this around lightly as I have dealt with it myself, but I think talking to someone (therapist, councellor) could help her realize why she feels miserable and that it's not normal to be moody 24/7.

Tl;dr: I think Lily's incessant rambling about how great her youth was is a coping mechanism because the life she leads isn't what it was hyped up to be. I have seen it within my own family and it can not only make yourself miserable, but (take it from me) can fuck up your kids aswell and make them feel unwanted...

You’ve hit the nail on the head here!

 

[Bexlouell]

I don’t even understand why her daughter is in the toilet with her anyway? I go into the bathroom, do my business and then come back out and my daughter (who is the same age as Grey) is still doing whatever she was doing. Is Grey glued to Lily’s hip? I just don’t understand it

My Daughter is 3 and whilst she does sit and play on her own, she will sometimes come into the bathroom whilst I'm in there. I'm in a flat so its easier for her to do that as opposed to us living in a house. She has seen me use tampons and is now at the age where she asks me what they are, TBH I don't know how to explain them so just say I'll tell you when you're older

 

[martaS]

Is only her and her husband at home, why is there for a bra? I haven't wore a bra since Dec lol, plus is winter, literally no one can see anything. Ah okay, I forgot she has big boobs and London ones....

I don't understand changing from a proper bra into a soft bra I am like, all or nothing when it comes to bras

 

[LA2019]

I get the feeling Lily’s checklist is based on what one of her sisters did, and nothing to do with Anna.

Yeah totally. I think being youngest by quite a few years she was always trying to play catch up with them. I do think she relishes giving smug 'advice' to her friends based on the fact that she had a wedding first, she bought a first, she had a baby first. You can tell that by the way she constantly says 'just wait until you have kids' because having a kid is her own life experience.

 

[martaS]

"Curated Truman Show channel" is the most accurate descriptor of Lily's 'content' I have ever seen. It's 100% true!

Has to be in the new thread tittle

 

[Aardvark]

Any old excuse, eh?

This explains the weak legs post pregnancy or whatever she’s talking about. Pregnancy can mess your body up in weird ways that you wouldn’t expect, the hormones really messed my joints up for example. But you sort it out by exercising, gentle physio, or finding a women’s health practitioner who can help.
She’s too lazy to do anything about it, so now it’s just another thing for her to complain about, and it’s exactly the same for her hair, she just can’t be bothered

 

[CuriousAndCurioser]

If you look at her legs on that story, she clearly peddles backwards several times. Is that a thing that they do during the classes, or is she doing that so it counts as moving, but it’s easier?

 

[Summernights]

Sigh

Dear Carysxoxox - I think the point is that Lily said that she 'doesn't understand women who don't want to have children'. That is very different to her saying 'having a child made me feel fulfilled' and leaving it at that. You can have a choice/opinion about something you have chosen for yourself without framing it in (negative) comparison to others who have chosen a different option. And even if she was trying to reassure Anna - that comes across as patronising. Lily's experience of motherhood will probably very different to Anna's (when/if the time comes) because motherhood is a unique experience but she can only provide a perspective from her limited viewpoint. And that is Lily all over. She has an opinion on everything and all her values/thought process is from her own limited life experience. So yeah, it's tiring and a turn off for a lot of people.

Don’t you mean “Dear Lilyxoxox ..”

 

[CuriousAndCurioser]

Funny how we were commenting how she had cut back on documenting everything she does, and she’s gone back to that.

 

[lavienrose]

Hi guys. I am a lurker here. Love all the updates. Did she really buy a Peloton?? She is the most inactive person ever. I can't see her actually sticking with it. It's such an expensive purchase for someone who has professed she hates exercising. Also Rich can't use it? She can't be serious! He is super active and presumably would love it! She is the absolute worse. I don't keep up with her often on IG or her videos bc she's boring as hell. I'd much rather read your insights here!

 

[imtakingabath]

Those static flyaways have nothing to do with giving birth Lily, they've either grown or broken off in the last 2 months judging by the length.

I'm no expert on postpartum hair loss (londoner but not a mother) but my understanding was that when you're pregnant, your hair grows a lot more dense, and you then shed it rapidly after? I didn't think it affected the length?

The hair you shed does partly grow back so then you get some short bits where the hair is essentially starting again from your scalp, if that makes sense, but I had a baby a week after Lily and my shorter hairs grew out ages ago!

 

[Kitkatkut]

Ehmm I don't remember my mum doing it in front of me either. Is that supposed to be a part of sex education?
By the time her daughter would be able to grasp the concept of periods and tampons, she would be grown enough not to go to bathroom with her mother, I'd say.

She said something like “she’s not supposed to see that”. I just don’t get what the huge deal is? I don’t mean to say that you need to teach your toddler about tampons of course, I just don’t see the problem if a toddler sees their mother using tampons.

 

[Loopiloo]

I don’t know why they didn’t put the Peloton in the massive runway to be honest.

Agreed! That’s where I assumed she’d put it. Is it now in one of the bedrooms that she complains are far too small for grey to play in or rich to have a desk in? She really is creative to suddenly find space for a massive exercise bike like that!

 

[jaymie]

I mean she does have a point that the most popular videos for curls are ones from those with like 2c/3a hair because there are still very Euro standards to preferred curl types but it's not hard at all to find videos for all curls ranging from 3-4. My hair is 2a/2b and I try to find posts specific to that and the algorithm floods me with curl types closer to Lily's. I'm actually jealous of those types of curls because I find the product market much better for them. Plus their curls are so much more fun and versatile.

It's fine to just say I'm not interested in this or it's too much work for me. Just admit you don't want to do it. Also, I would love the irony if Grey loses her curl when she's older and had the hair Lily always dreamed of. She would be the most jealous mother.

She just like a good moan, there are definitely videos out there. I think she is finding excuses to not do something, like you said, is completely okay to admit that she likes poker straight hair.

What do you think is her hair type? I think 3b/3c at most?

 

[ELFILY]

I miss not wearing a bra! Breastfeeding for nearly 20 months = not a single day without a bra in that time. I remember how exciting it was when I could stop wearing one at night haha.

I’ve never related to a comment more!

 

[Fofoca]

I bet they end up moving next year

Hopefully to Mars! (I’m assuming the internet connection will be awful there?)

 

[Summernights]

She’s definitely been reading here in regards to the curly girl method / curly hair stuff.

 

[Readread]

I'm no Michelin chef but surely you only add pasta water to pasta with a sauce? There's no sauce in her pasta, it'll just taste starchy

 

[Eileen_2019]

She sounds so patronising, like others have said 'I've already been through this.....' She probably wanted to say something different, and she can't help herself in sounded like she's better than others.

 

[Eileen_2019]

Anna did say she was recommended the app by a follower.

What gets me is that the recommendation came because Anna doesn't sort her photos and had thousands to go through. She praised Lily for being super efficient with photo organisation. Lily of course whole heartedly agreed that she was super on top of her photos.

Now Lily is using the app to sort out all her photos and saying how great it is

Why does Anna put up with this behaviour? It's getting ridiculous now.