Lauren Goodger #21 Baby soon, might arrive in June, bath full of water to relax her noon

[roseturntupnose]

Like has been previously said she has so many relatable things about her, that could help so many women.
Weight issues, unlucky in love, unfortunate childhood, negativity of social media, anxiety, a love of beauty products, a love of food.... and loads more.
Yet she either pretends those things dont exist, pretends to not struggle, lies, makes out shes better than every one else, and gives a complete false representation online of who she is, what she looks like, her body and her life. She could help so many, and this is what really really bugs me about her. Shes so vain she wont stoop to the level of the majority to help them.

 

[Clickbait]

Ok my lovelies have some nighttime reading for you all. More droning on about herself I particularly like her reference to her love of leather (there’s a photo of her promoting peta in the book) Also how she speaks about fake boobs

“If you have a boob job, then cover up rather than showing them off - it looks really cheap and tacky”

 

[Benhameensmummy]

Lauren “I’ve lost my appetite” Goodger

 

[Blowup80]

But early like but
Thread title no 22
#Lozza and her changing belly, wearing polyester that makes her smelly

 

[Pom Bear]

A ha ha ha ha ha....nae filter my ass

Has she been using lard on her face xx.

Looool xx.

 

[Katie8ee]

She should be about 24/25 weeks now.

I've just realised that she told us about the pregnancy on the 19th of January which means we have only known for just over two months. We have another three and a bit months of this shit to go

 

[Jackie Brown]

I have not seen this, but now I must! It’s sad because she patently doesn’t believe that. The book excerpts show someone who is obsessed by her appearance and the idea of being seen as ‘big’ which is literally the worst thing she can imagine. And all these fucked up thoughts that rattle around in her empty moon-faced head are going to be passed on to that poor baby.

She was an embarrassment and a car crash on CGD. Her and Chloe Sims, both deluded. They acted as if they were the perfect specimen of woman and the way they made these guys jump through hoops when I thought they were lucky to be on dates with these guys. They both must have a magic mirror. Chloe Sims in particular kept saying “I need bantz, where is the bantz?” But she very rarely had anything interesting or amusing to say to any of her dates. Goodger suddenly left the experiment before they all jetted off for the final date in Spain or wherever it was. I was looking forward to seeing her so called amazing bikini body but she had an engagement or something that she needed to attend. Convenient.

 

[xcxcx87]

So one of my friends messaged the editor at ok mag basically saying congrats on giving a pregnant woman who is on only fans and sends worn undies a column and apparently their reply was atrocious . Basically sticking up for Lauren and saying so what we empower women and if that is how she makes her money then that’s her choice. They were incredibly rude about it. As bad as her they are for even employing her

 

[Laurst]

Sweetcorn on a roast is wrong on so many levels.

 

[Sunnydaze101]

With In The Style though they have to ask you to Collab from what I know? She wishes they would as they pay you! Georgia from TOWIE has a new range out with them which is maternity and she has a much bigger following and is current. Georgia and Tommy are getting the baby show that Big Loz is desperate for and it's ironic she still thinks shes the star when Georgia and Tommy have been in it for years and are popular among the youth.

Ohhhh. That’s awesome then hopefully they don’t use her. She’s probably asked. She must have bought those awful jumpsuits off there herself and just tagging them so they can monitor stats if people click on her links and see if she’s relevant.
On her last post “someone”(aka goodger) asked wow where’s your jumpsuit from. and goodger replied and tagged instyle.

Another fine

£800 court bill for ex-Towie star Goodger over speeding case

Reality TV star Lauren Goodger has been hit with an £800 court bill and six penalty points after she snubbed a police speeding charge.

www.google.co.uk

Lauren Goodger Slammed For Filming An Instagram Story While Driving (Again)

Lauren Goodger has come under fire online and from road safety charities as she filmed an Instagram story while she was driving. Read more on Grazia.

www.google.co.uk

This one is quite funny. She comes out in a big white sheet. One pic shows this lady looking at her like WTF

Lauren Goodger caught parking in disabled bay – her response is priceless

YOU would think that after all these years in the limelight, Lauren Goodger would get used to having her picture taken.

www.google.co.uk

 

[Blowup80]

How long do we reckon it'll be before she has her first night out?
I can't remember who it was but they were out 6 days after their birth (some z lister) and all I was thinking when I saw the pics was (ICK ALERT) She's probably still passing huge clots.

6 days!! Obviously this z Lister had an easy birth a baby that slept through and got her figure back 40 mins after the birth🥱

Err you mean the latest Apple Phone


That's assuming Loz will still be famous in 14 years time.

Of course she'll be famous! She'll be on those Channel 5 programmes "my face is fucked off surgery" Or "my baybeh daddy left me for my dad" Or "my arse exploded in Tescos"

 

[Blowup80]

All of these pieces of text just show how vain she is. She's obsessed with her looks. Couldn't care less about her poor personality or lack of intelligence. Just cares how fat her legs look in cut off boots and not being a 12.

If being a 12 is what she considers to be her 'worst' feature, then she's fair stupider than she let's on.

Exactly this! She seems to constantly be looking for someone to say no you are not fat you are perfect. Why was she so ashamed to be a size 12? She has always had curves she could of used this to her advantage but she didn't she just lied and lied and still does! If she was honest about her weight struggles lots of women could relate but no she just continues being full of shit, hating on other women, lying about her size and filtering all her pics. She is a total nut job who only has herself to blame!

 

[Pom Bear]

You've got her exactly - pathetic! Well done @Pom Bear


You sure someone ain't been cleaning the sink again


That's debateable - however, you do need references from previous landlords to say you are a good payer and you need to provide normally 3 month's money up front as a deposit to be held against any damage at the end of the rental term... I sound like a friggin' letting agent haha.

Thank you xx.

265 suggested yesterday having Chaz as a toilet attendant...maybe he could attend to Loz's toilet xx.

More pics tomorrow

 

[265]

OMG the ten pounds of onions - nooooooooooooooooooooooooo Loz nooooooooo!

All she needs is ONE ONION, at least a fucking RED ONION, have a little class for fuckbuggerys sake.

I hope she opens a window after cooking.

 

[Katie8ee]

Just had a quick nap there, afternoon naps are for sure making a comeback from Lockdown Season One. Just saw the massive box of kids clothes getting sent her way and thought oh wait I do have previous in this territory.

Once many moons ago I used to live on a lovely little cobbled street called Rose Street with the view of a castle.. At that point I was a student and worked in Baby Gap on Princes Street (for those who are like whaaatt it's Edinburgh) .

I know loads of you have baby humans so know this but usually when a baby is born it gets far too many clothes. I would constantly get Mums coming in to exchange gifts because for instance 0-3 months baby grows and those clothes are too small within a heartbeat, some Mums would even use a certain onsie realise it was perfect and not open the other gifts for months.Usually we would advise to gift big (toddler range for starters).

Big Loz is recieving so many clothes it is impossible that the baby will be able to use them all. The decent human thing would be to gift these items to followers or donate to charity. What she is going to do is fill a wardrobe/drawers full of them to video on Instagram and then sell the lot on depop.

In summation baby clothes in the amount she is recieving are a luxury and some people have none. For every office guy I would help buy a £100 gift box with the office baby kitty for the mum to be I would have people in scrabbling the sale rails for anything they could afford.

This is an essay I apologise, don't forget if you buy your kids clothes at the Gap you have a year to return them. Wiley Mums often come in buy the sale rail for projected next 12 months and if it doesn't fit bring it back month 11 day 27 and get the money back./do it all again.

 

[Katie8ee]

I discovered @Carrington31 called this way back in January! We are too good.

 

[265]

And now for your enjoyment (apart from those buggers who whinge about the pattern on my plate)

My Roast Chicken Dinner.

 

[Katie8ee]

Has anyone ever been a scaffy as me and eaten chocolate in bed. Then it's melted on the sheets? I can imagine there's food remnants all over Lozza's flat.

100% guilty! When I closed the property after 2019 season I spent a week relaxing the shit out of life and binging Netflix while munching sweets in my bed. It came to an end when I went oh look there is a bit of chocolate I have dropped. Put it in my mouth.

It was half a chewed Dreamie

 

[Katie8ee]

Josh ALSO has a new song out soon, how convenient...

I just saw it when I was digging and I couldn't listen. I don't cringe at much but it's just too much. I saw Charlie posted all oi oi in the comments of it. Imagine your Big Loz, you are 34 years old and your running around with 22/23 year olds who think they are going to be rappers. When lockdown ends that will be her social circle. It's so embarrazzzing.

 

[Eyerollbrainache]

Was looking through my photos earlier and came across these little gems..
Long before I even knew about the joys of Tattle I was kind of obsessed with the catfish that is Big Loz Goodger

I can't get over the arse looking like a nappy of fresh shit. The audacity to photoshop that much as well like nobody would notice you look 12 years older and 4 stone bigger in real life than your Instagram. What a cock.