Jake Quickenden #96 Hello, I'd like to file for a divorce please. My husband is a gayboi cock tease! 🌈

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A huge congratulations to @ShowMeThe Money for our new thread title! You win a stick of Sarfend's finest cock, I mean rock!!

It was a belter that previous thread - full of , made-up stories that never happened and much speculation about Celebrity Masterchef! A homeless Ian Beale even made an appearance too!



He's been 'Presenting' again too - once in Wales and once in a manky corridor. Flapz showed her flaps and tramp stamp off on a grifted trip to Champneys and we saw her disgusting trotters again. Honestly, the sight of those horrid feet has put me off of cod for life and I love my chippy.



We had several stories that completely NEVER HAPPENED and he went to Karen's Diner. He was so taken with one of the waiters there that he started following him on Instagram. WTF?

Flapz is busy looking for green flags in people but she's too thick to see she's married to the biggest red flag going!

Today, we experienced the gayest advert of all time with Chris Hughes for The Perfume Shop. Jesus wept.

He's currently AWOL in Saaaarfend as The Full Monty is at the Cliffs Pavillion. He's obviously not staying at home or he would be posting with Gail. He was last seen in a gay bar with a Kiss Me Quick hat on with a stick of rock up his bum.

Keep on grinding Fakeys!!



A more detailed recap can be found in Wiki 8/9. Yes, we are on Page 9!

Previous thread:

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Possibly the most gayest advert of all time. I am NEVER setting foot in The Perfume Shop ever again. I would rather wipe shit around my neck than buy anything from this shop ever again after seeing these two utter tossers doing an advert for them.

An e-mail is on it's way to them. I showed Mr Crazy and two of my boys today and their faces said it all.

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It turns out that Squidward CAN sing because the clarinet failed!

 
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That recap is fucking gas with all the im pmsl He’s definitely wasn’t at home this week was he? And Saaaarfend is only 1.5 hours away? Is Saarfend known for its gay nightlife ?? When is flaps and her travel pillow off to America?
 
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That recap is fucking gas with all the rainbow im pmsl He’s definitely wasn’t at home this week was he? And Saaaarfend is only 1.5 hours away? Is Saarfend known for its gay nightlife ?? When is flaps and her travel pillow off to America?
It's got about four gay bars there. My mates go. Also there's Colours in Basildon, which is very popular with the gay community! He definitely wasn't 'commuting' was he. I hope he went on the pier and reached the bottom! He likes bottoms!

Keep on grinding!
 
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Sam really is living the life now that Fakeys been desperate for, for years Let’s be honest it also shows Fakey isn’t particularly liked (surprise surprise) cos even though I don’t dislike Sam, in some ways their personalities are very similar. The difference is ST doesn’t come across as desperate for fame like Fakey does. Considering ST comes from money and has a lifestyle F&F could only ever dream of, he appears a lot more humble, sincere and grateful for his opportunities than Fakey ever has. Now just manifesting ST gets offered SCD
Congrats on the thread title win @ShowMeThe Money and thanks for doing another fantastic recap @CrazyBaldhead
 
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That pink jumper and horrible look at me jacket, says it all, who wears that shit combination, Gay J does.......
 
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So flaps still home and prick getting Leo to try and say I love you yet again.Bless prick is poorlyand how ugly is he even with the filters on
 
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So flaps still home and prick getting Leo to try and say I love you yet again.Bless prick is poorlyand how ugly is he even with the filters onView attachment 2747515
Notice that whenever she’s going away with the kids he’s always suddenly ill? When she actually goes get ready for the full on pity party, he does it every time. How much he misses them but he has to ‘work’ for them, anxiety, grief, etc…. It’s been over a year since he went on a family holiday (one that included Fred) and that’s not because of work because he barely did anything until the tour started in September. That’s his choice
 
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Well shucks blush blush, thank you for the votes. And many thanks Crazy for the, as always fab intro & recap.

I am just on my way to have my lips blown up & then coated in creosote. Following this, I'm going to walk through a hedge backwards to style my hair - I'll pop the link below guyyys as I've had a few people ask me how I get my hair so greasy & lank.
 
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You’ve just literally made me spit my tea out
 
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They had that turkey holiday booked last year and he opted out as had another offer.I doubt he travelled home the past few days and has a coldI can’t understand why flaps stays in this marriage as these two are just hanging in there for the sake of it.Leo looks such a mess is she not embarrassed by how scruffy his hair is.See Zelda didn’t get any flowers from Adam I wonder what has happened that he is never mentioned.
 
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Why is he topless if he has a coldSaid he has had a busy few weeksHe really believes he works hard stupid prick.Both him and his awful mum have such a high opinion of themselves.How sad is it to listen to Leo at nearly three and he cannot string a sentence togetherThey just don’t seem to care that he’s so far behind in his development.
 
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I still don’t understand the need to keep telling Instagram how busy he is/has been. Does he not realise it actually makes him sound lazy, ungrateful and that he constantly moans whenever he works more than 12 hours a week? He chooses to work away from home, he chooses to take any scrap of work that will mean him getting on the TV for 2 mins but then he complains about being tired/ill/busy etc…. His attention seeking and woe is me is going to be off the charts whilst they’re all in America
 
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Get a grip you lazy prick, ILL fucking girly cunt get on with it we have to, fancy being married to that ....
 
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He calls himself an actor, presenter, mma champion, Sarcoma ambassador, mental health campaigner, family man (remember these are his words not mine) but strange how people only ever think of him in terms of him being an attention seeking z lister who will go on any reality show going.
Two tweets regarding Ekin Su going on CBB and his name gets mentioned. Not about him going on there but the fact she’s trying to outdo him. That says it all really
 

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Well done on your thread title @ShowMeThe Money
Quality recap @CrazyBaldhead pmsl at wiping shit on your neck

Soooo Fakey hasn't been commuting as he reckoned then as he would have been posting what he has this morning, umpteen stories of the little troll Leo He is such a shit dad honestly, wonder how many times he coached him to say I love you before he filmed it for the tena huns. Plonking him in front of the TV and letting him stuff his face again. I see Fruit, yogurt and Jelly on the table, surely one of those is enough for a 3 year old, he is literally the real life Augustus Gloop. His speech is terrible

Tada Fakey has a cold and he feels 1/10, what a twat he is is it a Columbian cold. In a week of work for him he's on stage for approximately 7 hours in total. The show is 2 hours 20 mins including the interval, and someone who saw it said he doesn't appear until the end of Act One, 7 hours work a week fucking hell most people work 8 hours a DAY, he has all day to himself and TFM starts at 7.30 or 8pm in some places. Lazy, lazy, lazy fucker
 
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