Postie was probably trying to work out what smells like (and resembles) a rotting corpse
(Jest, your honor, despite my father's criminal past, I have no knowledge of what a burning body looks/smells like)
View attachment 251220
[Man tries not to laugh gif]
Surely whiter than mayo for our Jackie?Perhaps she's looking for a job as paint chart colour decider? It's that white going to be called white or whiter than white?
Sorry to quibble, my hotcrush @Alansbigplate but it was a priest...forbidden fruit.She thinks she’s fuckin Fleabag
(the vicar though. You would wouldn’t you)
Postman will have been ‘is that the smell of bull shite? Lost her fuckin books my arsehole’
This might shock you, but I’m not the religious typeSorry to quibble, my hotcrush @Alansbigplate but it was a priest...forbidden fruit.
https://giphy.com/Tk1t9uDum1FAVYebX8
he probably thought the drains were blockedView attachment 251220
[Man tries not to laugh gif]
Thank fuck for that! https://giphy.com/ZJCiqIGrD97YkThis might shock you, but I’m not the religious type
Yes, and glueing them together with biscoff because she is such a maverick/greedy goblin.But, but.... wasn’t it *just* the other week that she wouldn’t stop going on about the copious amounts of biscuits she was eating? So ‘these days’ means like, this week? Classic THEN and NOW situation, ffs
Thank fuck for that! https://giphy.com/ZJCiqIGrD97Yk
I made this twice back when I was but a stupid jackolyte. TWICE. The first time I thought it was minging because of something *I'd* done. So I made it again just to check. It's lucky I am now a bullying ninny or I might actually be considering dining on moonshine mash and bollock sausages.I would encourage any frau to cook a JM recipe if they haven’t already. It’s an experience. The salad bag pesto is not advisable unless you’re seeking a near-death experience though
Yes.the vicar though. You would wouldn’t you)
Mrs Noggins, upon entering the pharmacy:"Someone would present a problem and I had to use what I had to find a solution" is a bit terrifying if you're dispensing drugs. It's not like subbing arborio rice with basmati. Ooooh I'm sorry Mrs Noggins, your life saving medication isn't in stock today but how about you swallow a few viagra and rub some tiger balm on it and it'll be the same thing.
Jack's obviously in the wrong job. She should be in government.I can't cope with this arsehole. She's spent the last six months constantly going on about biscuits and Biscoff spread like how fucking short does she think our memories are?! And she ate a bag of sugared fucking doughnuts 2 days ago. Deleting your verbal diarreah tweets doesn't actually delete peoples' memories. And absolute cringe at the whole Prince Harry thing. Imagine trying to insinuate to your followers that you and him are mates in real life over something you read in a magazine.
Ah glad it's not just me who though sausage and rice a bit weird.I am absolutely creased at the 39p recipe (it isn’t 39p), the fact someone is having sausage with rice (wtf?!) and that right under the picture of the slop is the word thankyou and also a good ol’ rattle of the tip jar. S
She’s absolutely shameless.
View attachment 251079
PS. Even in her Celery Studios Edinburgh production, that isn’t casserole and it looks fucking disgusting.
I haven’t got bonjela would a squirt of Mr Muscle do? Absolutely! XMrs Noggins, upon entering the pharmacy:
"Jack i have an ouchy mouth, paracetamol, half a bottle of penicillin and some bonjela, what can i make?"
blend it all together and bung it in a vigorously simmering curry! apply plenty of black pepper eyeshadow and a lady doctor's red lips! gaze upon yourself in your wifi mirror! what, you don't have one? now fuck off. xMrs Noggins, upon entering the pharmacy:
"Jack i have an ouchy mouth, paracetamol, half a bottle of penicillin and some bonjela, what can i make?"
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