Don’t mention unruly labia, don’t mention unru...oh no!She didn’t get much jam yield off those greengages, did she?
Trying to imagine that muck spread on some cheap wet ham and wondering what the hell’s going on in the world
Halloumi does not melt, you melt!She melts the halloumi into the sauce. Hun....how?! Maybe it's just me, but I thought halloumi famously doesn't melt.View attachment 226937
this is maddening —there is so much work to be done in this space, but JM is not the person to do it. Her ridiculous out of date posturing and constantly inflating self-aggrandising stance will only detract from the real, sobering, stories that should be brought to the fore.
NO ONE FUCKING CARES!
I swear you just add the yokes for carbonara though? It's not carbonara. It looks like dried out pasta combined with stringy cheese. Now fuck off.
I really hope that’s someone she knows IRL because if that person is telling a random on Twitter they love them to the moon and back then that’s a worry
She’ll be “personally delivering”... “and I mean that”.... fucking hell, is this an episode of the Twighlight Zone? A sociopath repeats the same fake phrases ad Infinitum, and we’re the only ones who don’t fall for it
Yes, in a carbonara you’re totally dependent on the residual heat of the pasta /starchy water to bring together the egg yolks, bacon renderings and properly melting grated cheese to make a silken deliciousness that belies the few ingredients required. It most certainly is not “pasta and vegetables with cheesy sauce and lumps of slightly warm yet characteristically solid halloumi”.I swear you just add the yokes for carbonara though? It's not carbonara. It looks like dried out pasta combined with stringy cheese. Now fuck off.
I can't see the grating question, only the melting one which was before it was mentioned here so I don't think there is crossover here.Someone on her insta has asked if she grated the halloumi to get it to melt. While funny, if you're reading here and going there, please desist.
I thought so, but glad a more culinary-minded frau can confirm! If I ever make carbonara (which is quite rare because it uses a lot of animal products that I do try to avoid when I can - I am not 90% vegan though and would never claim to be!) I use THAT MAN's and it's never failed me tbh.Yes, in a carbonara you’re totally dependent on the residual heat of the pasta /starchy water to bring together the egg yolks, bacon renderings and properly melting grated cheese to make a silken deliciousness that belies the few ingredients required. It most certainly is not “pasta and vegetables with cheesy sauce and lumps of slightly warm yet characteristically solid halloumi”.
such bollocks — she really knows nothing about food
It's in the same comment as the melting one, but I'm maybe just being as paranoid as JMI can't see the grating question, only the melting one which was before it was mentioned here so I don't think there is crossover here.
Her situation may have lasted "over two years" but she could have ended it at any time by asking her comfortably-off parents for help...rather than, say, guilt-tripping them for the rest of their lives by publicly whingeing about being forced to sell lightbulbs and bin-dive for Big Macs.
This isn't even the first time she's bastardised carbonara. In one of her books (can't recall which one) she dipped her toe into French-Italian fusion food with her "car-brie-nara" (literally carbonara with brie) and in Good Food For Bad Days she proffered "crabby Nora" (carbonara with crab)It’s not a fucking carbonara. I have italian family. Why was it ok for her to go on about the Joloff rice when it came to ‘that man’, yet she can culturally appropriate whatever she wants? (Not that I give a shit, no italian is going to accept that’s a carbonara, they’d just pass on it)
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