Jack Monroe #601 Replican't

[Valiofthedolls]

If we added a selection of her most shocking slops to the wiki, what should they be? I vote for:

• Horse gunk lasagne/knife lasagne
• Cake with a USB port
• Easter cake ft. the devil
• Christmas chainsaw massacre
• Lingreenie

Forgot the Mackeson, fag end, mouldy sponge and ball bearing trifle served in the manky old light fitting!!!

featu dead wasp

 

[Falkor]

Another one has to be the "Fifteens" that looked like they contained raw flesh and pasta

I seem to recall that guest once had a recipe that involved putting custard powder or icing sugar or something in a blender which could potentially explode/start a fire, does anyone remember what that was?

Was that the time she said there was no need to waste money on buying caster sugar or icing sugar because you could buy cheaper granulated sugar and just whack it in a food processor until it was the right level of fineness?

 

[witchofwestbyfleet]

Was that the time she said there was no need to waste money on buying caster sugar or icing sugar because you could buy cheaper granulated sugar and just whack it in a food processor until it was the right level of fineness?

That was in her recipe for peanut butter ice cream: https://archive.is/J4uI7

 

[MediumLoad]

Was that the time she said there was no need to waste money on buying caster sugar or icing sugar because you could buy cheaper granulated sugar and just whack it in a food processor until it was the right level of fineness?

Buying a food processor so that you can make your own icing sugar must be the thriftiest of thrifty tips ever. And there's me without a food processor and wasting my money by buying icing sugar instead. No wonder I don't own my forever home. Oh wait, I do.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Buying a food processor so that you can make your own icing sugar must be the thriftiest of thrifty tips ever. And there's me without a food processor and wasting my money by buying icing sugar instead. No wonder I don't own my forever home. Oh wait, I do.

Save money on expensive food processors by buying a box of icing sugar and a house instead.

There you go, Jack. You can have that one for your next book (hahahahahaha) courtesy of dearheart @MediumLoad with a bonus forever hydrangea chucked in from the rest of us.

 

[StatusWoe]

Guest appeared in a painting.

The stray nose, the photoshop-gone-wrong proportions, the strange hat. All it needs is a claw hand and a bit of lasagne stuck to the wallpaper.

 

[phoebuscartel]

Forgot the Mackeson, fag end, mouldy sponge and ball bearing trifle served in the manky old light fitting!!! View attachment 3337608featu dead wasp
View attachment 3337609

It will always be mapo tofu trifle to me

 

[StatusWoe]

I think it was the year before? In her flat cap, mockney, and Peaky Blinders year? It's probably walked out the fridge, and bought a flat by now.

Last Christmas I gave you my eels, but the very next day you threw them away.

 

[Captainmouse]

Was that the time she said there was no need to waste money on buying caster sugar or icing sugar because you could buy cheaper granulated sugar and just whack it in a food processor until it was the right level of fineness?

But lacks the anti caking agent

 

[phoebuscartel]

And might explode

 

[SouthendRealEstate]

Save money on expensive food processors by buying a box of icing sugar and a house instead.

There you go, Jack. You can have that one for your next book (hahahahahaha) courtesy of dearheart @MediumLoad with a bonus forever hydrangea chucked in from the rest of us.

Bib would make a wonderful you-know-what, if it was about 300-or-so posts later

 

[Potatoes O’Houlihan]

Hang on, let’s rewind a sec…
How bloody massive an ‘S’ hook would you need to fit over your tap?? Mine is a square shaped spout over an inch wide…so you not only need a huge hook knocking about but the carabinas [sic] too. And they published that tit?? Ffs

 

[WoolyMammoth]

I know you are joking, but my Christmas present from my in-laws (not in-laws I'm not married etc,etc) was a cheque. Whilst it was lovely for them to do so, it just means bothering to go to a bank as mine doesn't do the "take a picture and it's in your bank" service.

And yes I do remember cheque books, and postal orders, and sending a telegram. But I'm not like Jack, attention seeking by posting "Who remembers" crap. It's not an achievement to get old, it's just a luck.

@MancBee Is this you saying you want people to pay for their toothpaste by postal order, or can they use PayPal?

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Guest appeared in a painting.

View attachment 3337694

The stray nose, the photoshop-gone-wrong proportions, the strange hat. All it needs is a claw hand and a bit of lasagne stuck to the wallpaper.

Don't forget those hulking great norks pulled up by a industurial strength ill-fitting bra.

 

[Five hundred dogs]

Hang on, let’s rewind a sec…
How bloody massive an ‘S’ hook would you need to fit over your tap?? Mine is a square shaped spout over an inch wide…so you not only need a huge hook knocking about but the carabinas [sic] too. And they published that tit?? Ffs

I’d also say that taps aren’t designed to be load bearing. A tea towel full of cooked pasta swinging off your kitchen tap could do some damage.

 

[Nonah]

Just saw this on Threads and thought of you lot. Hope it’s ok not to squig as it’s not directly Guest related.

 

[griftalo]

I’d also say that taps aren’t designed to be load bearing. A tea towel full of cooked pasta swinging off your kitchen tap could do some damage.

My kitchen tap is so low to the sink it just wouldn’t work. The whole thing is insane.
why would someone not just strain using the lid?!
What next? Pour onto your mattress and let the water seep in? Scrape pasta off mattress and into bowl. Add cat treats

 

[Mr Krabs]

If we added a selection of her most shocking slops to the wiki, what should they be? I vote for:

• Horse gunk lasagne/knife lasagne
• Cake with a USB port
• Easter cake ft. the devil
• Christmas chainsaw massacre
• Lingreenie

Black and cheese has to be one of the most visually unappealing slops.

I’m not sure I’ve seen these vintage scones before which somehow made it in the bleeping Guardian. Even comparing this to a kid’s cookery project seems unfair as my children could make a scone that at least rises.

 

[Flivver]

Ice hockey pucks.

 

[BeardyBap]

I know this has been covered extensively here but there really is nothing “thrifty” about any of those “tips”.