Jack Monroe #601 Replican't

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SouthendRealEstate

It was to help people cook recipes with limited food available. Matt could have nailed it. Jamie did. Jack did not.
 
Reactions: 44

LizzieE.

Captainmouse said:
I think she’s been 'cooking'
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This needs explaining. The misery just seems off those place mats. The peas on their own are creating a misama of despair. If this is the level of festive knees up round her, then I feel that she will never k ow happi ess as she has no basic understanding of it. She will spend her time trying to create a replicant of happiness without anything to work with and keep finding herself clutching broken hearts in bombed out, suitcases halls, something something...
 
Reactions: 32

MediumLoad

That's not a Christmas dinner. That's Christmas rations. "One slice of beef and two roast potatoes each. I said two Brian, put that other one back!"

Festive cheer is being rationed as well.
 
Reactions: 36

Nottonightbabe

Onestorytoomany said:
Don't forget those hulking great norks pulled up by a industurial strength ill-fitting bra.
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Y'know, if you have huge norks but can't afford an industrial strength bra, you can make your own from some deftly arranged cloth, 3 carabiners and an S hook .
 
Reactions: 53

Hollaaa

That's four lovely ingredients ruined by putting them where they don't belong.
 
Reactions: 25

HotesTilaire

Dunno but one of those chickpea lads is doing Munch’s The Scream


I’ve never seen the baked wasps before!
“Fishfinger comic lasagne“ and “thrice boiled beetroot water” pasta with “raw flour blended with oil and a cheese slice” sauce for me, on the most offensive slop list
 
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Reactions: 35

hoopdedoo

Somehow in all the horror excitement over Grifty Kitchen, I missed the tip about making washing-up cloths.

If you hem the cloths with glue, even with a hot iron and a tea towel (equipment that all povs have on hand in working order) placed on top of the cloth, the glue is going to dissolve the very first time the cloth is placed in hot water, or washed. Guest also forgot to mention that the ironing should be done on top of another towel, or on an ironing board, unless you would like a nice scorch mark on your bungakitchen counter.

Hemming something like this is just about the simplest kind of sewing that anyone can do (except for cack-handed fools like guest). Or you could just cut the spare material into the right size square, and trim any loose ends as they happen.

Thank[space]you, rattle rattle.
 
Reactions: 43

HotesTilaire

Even in the early days she was wanging on that you could use cat food tins for napkin rings. I didn’t click on until the other year that she was using the expensive little gold tins. I’d been imagining she suggested rinsing and chopping the other end off a 400g tin of Kit e Kat, to put a napkin in.

Also if you have napkins but no rings, simply fold the napkin. #hoteshacks
 
Reactions: 51

BeardyBap

The very very best bit of the GK launch and safety backlash was the neckbeards and rage nanas getting into some serious contortions to insist that #JackShacks are perfectly sensible thankyouverymuch right up to and beyond the point where the publishing house was issuing disclaimers and the Trussel Trust was trying to distance itself.

If not a blatant lie (FREQUENTLY?!?), squig at the very least has no idea what a boning knife is.

Gold star for elaborate scenario

Fuckinell two man job was it?

Grylls advocates sucking the water out of elephant plops, maybe not a great comparison mate.

Either batshit or taking the piss, can’t decide.

Thankyou Professor.

That’s the bar then is it, missis?

OK there are more trolls than sycophants represented here, clearly.

Don’t have a meldown, folks.

Allow her to briefly explain:
 
Reactions: 50

TrolleyParton

I'm gonna imagine that she only got the DKL gig because an end-of-her-tether LJC called in some favours in a time when nobody wanted to leave their house.
 
Reactions: 36
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