When a school goes info special measures there is money and assistance to get you out of it. Primaries seem to fair better out of OFSTED so I don’t believe this at all.
Jack Monroe #561 Me. I happened. You're welcome
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Seeing irl and on this forum the impact that narc abusers have in their relationships, I find it very difficult to read opinions that it’s Leggy or LJC or BabyDaddy or whoever’s fault that guest has got away with the grift for as long as she has. Big
to those Frauen and Herren dealing with this stuff, it’s tough going and none of you needs to feel more blame or responsibility.
You don't believe it because it is clearly bull. How do I know: 1) Jack 2) 20 years of school leadership.
Agreed. She used to threaten to harm herself when people said her food looked tit on Twitter, imagine what she was like if she had a disagreement with a partner.
Yeah, when people talk about the 'West London media set' having been a bad influence on the smol pixie, I suspect they're usually referring to Leggy... but LJC was(/is) absolutely a part of that group in her own right. She's a powerful, influential media figure who stuck by Jack during some of the worst, most manipulative chaoi.
That she escaped Jack's orbit and has continued to do well ever since is to her credit, and I do have a lot of sympathy for whatever-the-duck was going on with the 'bubble buddy' stuff during those horrible periods of lockdown. And I get that Jack is an expert manipulator and almost certainly messed badly with her head - but LJC has continued to provide passive support as late as the Shattenstone interview last year: they were calling her when Jack failed to answer her door, and yet Jack repaid her by shoving half the blame for buying "four" unnecessary sideboards onto her.
There's a line to be drawn between being repeatedly abused by Jack, and allowing hundreds or thousands (or hundreds of thousands) of others to be abused by her, and I'm not at all sure which side of that line that LJC sits on.
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I think the thing is that some of the things Jack posts makes it sound like she’s a complete narc abuser but then there is “LJC talked me out of crowdfunding for a house” so it clearly isn’t as simple as she was a horrible evil abuser and LJC never dared stand up to her.Seeing irl and on this forum the impact that narc abusers have in their relationships, I find it very difficult to read opinions that it’s Leggy or LJC or BabyDaddy or whoever’s fault that guest has got away with the grift for as long as she has. Big
Similarly BabyDaddy - whatever happened or whether they had an actual relationship or not is their business and I don’t judge but I do judge him for letting her use his son like that. He had a custody case, using her own damn words online, 99.9% of parents having to deal with a narc ex partner could only dream of. If he didn’t take action to protect his son, he did enable her and the enabling is 100% on him - and it’s him SB will turn to and ask “Why didn’t you stop her?”. They weren’t in a relationship, he was married to another bloody woman for a good part of it - he can’t use “wahhhhh narccccc” to excuse the fact he’s failed SB too.
Talking about crowdfunding a house was just another way to humiliate and embarrass LJC. - as in look at my rich and successful fiance she won't even buy a house for me- and we only have Jack's word on this. LJ C was probably to terrified to say anything, for fear of Jack's reaction.
Jack did the same with her lockdown beg, then claiming LJ C abandoned her leaving her with an unmanageable rental commitment, then claiming LJ C when moved back in as a lockdown buddy but only ever contributed some cheese. Jack has also implied that LJ C was mean and secretive about money.
And of course Jack going out of her way to ruin LJC's work nights out.
Eta and, guessing on this, LJ C refused to have joint finances which made Jack very very angry.
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Similarly though we only have Jack’s word she ruined LJC’s nights out by making her come softly gently home to pick her up off the floor. When she claims other friends have done it, there’s a hefty dose of skepticism amongst the frauen - just because LJC was a real person doesn’t mean that happened the way Jack told it either. If everything Jack says about half her relationships is a lie, it’s difficult to work out where the line was between hole and full on narc abuser LJC was terrified of, no? If it’s likely Jack lied about the crowdfunder and talking her out of it, it’s just as likely the hissy fits ending in LJC coming home from important work events to stroke her hair and calm her down were lies.
ETA: lies for her normal “I’m the most special vulnerable smol pixie ever, everyone has to look after me” schtick specifically.
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I have way more sympathy for SB's dad (and the rest of his family) than I do for Leggy, LJC, or Big D - simply because of the power gradients involved.
Jack might have thought she was better than Leggy or LJC, but the reality is that they both had powerful non-Jack networks to fall back on. If either Leggy or LJC had turned on her, Jack would have been done for... but SB's dad didn't(/doesn't) haven anything like that power. He's stayed quiet and kept the peace, and hasn't allowed himself to be used to back up her tall tales - and I think that's the most we could possibly have expected from him.
Honestly I don’t think we know the half of it about how abusive she is. We only have her own accounts of what happened because no one else will talk about it. If people weren’t worried about what she’d do, they would have sold their story.
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Don’t tell me the woman on the left isn’t a woman in an abusive relationship
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Don’t tell me the woman on the left isn’t a woman in an abusive relationship
People who do things like she has done - pretended to have cancer, let a kitten die in agony rather than be humanely put to sleep, either let her young child watch over her terrified that she was going to die, or lied publicly that she had done it - don't have boundaries. They treat the people around them like tit.
Neither of these options makes her look good. Either guest repeatedly got so paralytic that Louisa had to keep leaving work/social events to softly gently scoop her up etc. Or she's lying about it for attention. It's like how she can't see that saying "my parents were desperately poor but kept taking in vulnerable kids" or "I chose to keep my son in a home with no food or heating" makes her sound much worse than the truth
Leggy is the spitting image of a girl who bullied me and my best friend at secondary school (mainly because we were into hair metal, and she was into "real" metal like Slayer and Iron Maiden 
), so I'll never have any time or sympathy for her I'm afraid.
), so I'll never have any time or sympathy for her I'm afraid.With respect, I don’t think it’s quite as simple as “if Jack wasn’t abusive, they’d have sold their stories”. Neither Leggy or LJC strike me as the type who would sell a story about their ex-partner to the papers, whether abusive or not, neither of them have any need to.
Jack’s parents are too focused on their own image and dobbing her in would have repercussions for them.
SB’s Dad I accept can’t because of SB - I don’t think he should have exposed her lies as such, I just think he should have acted to prevent his son being used as a constant pawn in her game of lies - such as the photo shoots with SB in which he could have stopped.
The rest of her exes we don’t know anything near enough about to judge whether or not they would have sold a story about her if she wasn’t a nightmare.
I'd love to know a bit more about the story and timing behind her Grauniad hagiography of SB's dad as "always being there etc etc". Everything she does is in reaction to something, so I assume someone somewhere put their foot down and insisted she stopped pretending he'd been a totally absent deadbeat dad when clearly he hadn't.
In fairness (!) Jack is a crappy lying grifter but she's not assaulted anyone or even committed a crime as far as I'm aware. She's not been abusing anyone, rather exploiting their kindness and gullibility. It's not like LJC has been enabling her to keep children in the bungabasement. I think it's very easy to judge from the outside in.
I'm very close to a family of several children where one of them has behaved so appallingly that her siblings no longer speak to her. Her parents, having been frozen out by her several times over the years, walk on eggshells with her. It infuriates the others as they feel their parents are pandering to Y and letting her get away with appalling behaviour, but the simple reason is they are her parents, they love her and don't want to lose her. I'm going to err on the side of caution and believe that it really isn't as easy as it may appear to call out/extricate oneself from a very tricky human.
I’ve genuinely not got one single duck to give about the ins and outs of her relationship with LJC, Leggy SBs dad or OH.
I’d bet my house it was a simple case of Jack love-bombing, but acting relatively normal at the start then the mask slips, they realise she’s a fruit loop and move on.
I’d bet my house it was a simple case of Jack love-bombing, but acting relatively normal at the start then the mask slips, they realise she’s a fruit loop and move on.
There is no light in her eyes in the first pic. When my mum left her abusive relationship and the truth started to come out, I overheard a relative saying "thats why she always looked so sad". And it's true, she looked sad, tired, devoid of any spark. He took her best years and destroyed them. She is older now, gran and looks so much happier. She experienced abuse and trauma that Guest could never imagine but she doesn't let it rule her life. She has flashbacks and PTSD but she has actively sought treatment and engages with it because she needs it. I hate that guest uses being skint for a few months as a big performance for why she can't open doors or function in her day to day life.
During the Bubble Buddy days, it was revealed LJC’S mum was undergoing cancer treatment. I would imagine that was at the forefront of her mind. She'd also had a serious case of covid. I think theirs was a toxic relationship. L was a very heavy woman when they first met and she had low self esteem. I think Guest will have recognised that and used it to her advantage. Someone on here, I can't member who, had met people or a person that was friends with L. Iirc, they said L was capable of holding her own and confident in her career and generally didn't take nonsense. They were surprised that she had booked up with guest. I think she probably did fight back or put her foot down at times which resulted in underhand tactics from guest (naked streak, etc). L made her get a skip to declutter for e.g. but guest probably retaliated by grfting and spending again. She probably passed most of her grift geld off as tip jar or patreon. Tbh it's believable, especially for media types to have exta income streams. Guest just had to put on a show of sending out postcards etc. If LJC was working in the office, how was she to know what guest was doing? Someone as sneaky as guestvwill always have some lie or explanation for xyz behaviour or incidents. LJC was possibly unschooled in the ways of the narc or felt incredible pity for guest. They might even have been snow fiends together. Who knows, guest might be incredibly charming and charismatic like Boris is said to be.
During the Bubble Buddy days, it was revealed LJC’S mum was undergoing cancer treatment. I would imagine that was at the forefront of her mind. She'd also had a serious case of covid. I think theirs was a toxic relationship. L was a very heavy woman when they first met and she had low self esteem. I think Guest will have recognised that and used it to her advantage. Someone on here, I can't member who, had met people or a person that was friends with L. Iirc, they said L was capable of holding her own and confident in her career and generally didn't take nonsense. They were surprised that she had booked up with guest. I think she probably did fight back or put her foot down at times which resulted in underhand tactics from guest (naked streak, etc). L made her get a skip to declutter for e.g. but guest probably retaliated by grfting and spending again. She probably passed most of her grift geld off as tip jar or patreon. Tbh it's believable, especially for media types to have exta income streams. Guest just had to put on a show of sending out postcards etc. If LJC was working in the office, how was she to know what guest was doing? Someone as sneaky as guestvwill always have some lie or explanation for xyz behaviour or incidents. LJC was possibly unschooled in the ways of the narc or felt incredible pity for guest. They might even have been snow fiends together. Who knows, guest might be incredibly charming and charismatic like Boris is said to be.
TLDR I don't think it was black and white between them. As others have pointed out too.
The truth is none of us know what really went on inside Jack's intimate relationships. Everything is inference based on what SHE has put out on social media; neither Leggy or LJC or OH or Baby Daddy nor anyone else has ever spoken publicly about being in a relationship with her.
From what we've been told about Baby Daddy, he's likely been overawed by Jack and her family having more wealth & status than him and, if he is an ordinary bloke with a fairly small, quiet life (not judging), he may not have had any idea of how to handle Jack when she acted out. I have huge sympathy for him because it sounds like he has a solid family around him and he gets up and goes to work every day and looks after his children and he will have to deal with Jack for the rest of his days. My sense is he does his best and provides stability for their child as much as possible.
We simply do not know whether any of them recognised that Jack behaviour fits with a narcisstic personality disorder while they were embroiled with her. I wouldn't have known, if it were me.
We don't know whether any of them tried to talk Jack out of her grift while they were with her or not. It's a stretch to assume that they were tacitly complicit simply because she didn't change her ways while with them. Or because they didn't go public and bring her down; that's putting a huge responsibility on them and, ultimately, Jack is the one who has to take responsibility for her own tit.
I think it is fair to assume that none of them were monitoring her every tweet and it's really on Twitter that the grift played out, with the begging and sob stories and repeated links to Patreon and PayPal. I believe only LJC is even on Twitter and she is very intermittently there. So, I think we can assume she wasn't seeing every Jack screed or fight there.
Some things about all three: OH, LJC and Leggy. All of them seem to work very hard, with potentially long hours. Perhaps OH had more regular office hours but he was also commuting into London which makes for a long day. LJC and Leggy both work in sectors with long hours, irregular schedules and late nights. So, I can't imagine there was much head space or time in the day to read Jack's every brain fart online. And that she curated what she told them to their faces.
I imagine that lockdown was a revealing and difficult time for LJC. For the first time, she was at home all day with Jack, thereby witnessing her raging and shouting and complaining about lost work etc, undoubtedly in person with her as well as online. At the same time, LJC was just starting her new job at Channel 4 but was far away from the action in Essex and presumably spending long hours in Zoom calls and working every day. It was a very big leap up into a senior role AND at this challenging time for news.
Can you imagine trying to concentrate on your work while manic Jack is popping into your space every few minutes with her new craft idea, some tit recipe, another outrage about someone something on Twitter? Jack has the attention span of a fly.
Her online begging also went through the roof in lockdown. And possibly Jack was both whining to LJC about getting her work opportunities while also possibly bullying her about joint expenses. LJC would've been really stressed and may not have joined all the dots while immersed in that living hell.
Whatever else happened during that strange time, LJC tried to make a break for it so she must've been awakened to Jack's worst behaviours by then. Why she went back as a bubble buddy before finally breaking it off is something we just don't know.
I think the point someone raised about power is relevant. From what she has said, Jack seems to value men more than women -- she's much more concerned about pleasing her father and grandfather than the women in her family. We don't know if she has any close friends but she likes to imply that her housemates, friends who help her move house /lift stuff / do things for her are men. I think she has more respect for men than women and I also think she probably picks partners who she feels superior to and that she probably bullies them.
The power and gender dynamics of a same sex relationship can be complicated but I would guess that Jack always likes to be top dog, her fragile, ill, smol pixie charade notwithstanding. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to have Jack playing out her tit, with its accompanying rages, lying and manipulation. For Leggy and LJC, there must have been an initial spark of attraction and feelings of love and I imagine it took a lot of strength and perspective to realise their love wasn't ever going to be enough for Jack and that she was likely to suck them dry.
So, I personally hold a space of compassion for anyone who's been in an intimate relationship with Jack. I know she would've flattened me and hollowed me out and I wouldn't have understood what was going on at all until I was wrecked by her.
From what we've been told about Baby Daddy, he's likely been overawed by Jack and her family having more wealth & status than him and, if he is an ordinary bloke with a fairly small, quiet life (not judging), he may not have had any idea of how to handle Jack when she acted out. I have huge sympathy for him because it sounds like he has a solid family around him and he gets up and goes to work every day and looks after his children and he will have to deal with Jack for the rest of his days. My sense is he does his best and provides stability for their child as much as possible.
We simply do not know whether any of them recognised that Jack behaviour fits with a narcisstic personality disorder while they were embroiled with her. I wouldn't have known, if it were me.
We don't know whether any of them tried to talk Jack out of her grift while they were with her or not. It's a stretch to assume that they were tacitly complicit simply because she didn't change her ways while with them. Or because they didn't go public and bring her down; that's putting a huge responsibility on them and, ultimately, Jack is the one who has to take responsibility for her own tit.
I think it is fair to assume that none of them were monitoring her every tweet and it's really on Twitter that the grift played out, with the begging and sob stories and repeated links to Patreon and PayPal. I believe only LJC is even on Twitter and she is very intermittently there. So, I think we can assume she wasn't seeing every Jack screed or fight there.
Some things about all three: OH, LJC and Leggy. All of them seem to work very hard, with potentially long hours. Perhaps OH had more regular office hours but he was also commuting into London which makes for a long day. LJC and Leggy both work in sectors with long hours, irregular schedules and late nights. So, I can't imagine there was much head space or time in the day to read Jack's every brain fart online. And that she curated what she told them to their faces.
I imagine that lockdown was a revealing and difficult time for LJC. For the first time, she was at home all day with Jack, thereby witnessing her raging and shouting and complaining about lost work etc, undoubtedly in person with her as well as online. At the same time, LJC was just starting her new job at Channel 4 but was far away from the action in Essex and presumably spending long hours in Zoom calls and working every day. It was a very big leap up into a senior role AND at this challenging time for news.
Can you imagine trying to concentrate on your work while manic Jack is popping into your space every few minutes with her new craft idea, some tit recipe, another outrage about someone something on Twitter? Jack has the attention span of a fly.
Her online begging also went through the roof in lockdown. And possibly Jack was both whining to LJC about getting her work opportunities while also possibly bullying her about joint expenses. LJC would've been really stressed and may not have joined all the dots while immersed in that living hell.
Whatever else happened during that strange time, LJC tried to make a break for it so she must've been awakened to Jack's worst behaviours by then. Why she went back as a bubble buddy before finally breaking it off is something we just don't know.
I think the point someone raised about power is relevant. From what she has said, Jack seems to value men more than women -- she's much more concerned about pleasing her father and grandfather than the women in her family. We don't know if she has any close friends but she likes to imply that her housemates, friends who help her move house /lift stuff / do things for her are men. I think she has more respect for men than women and I also think she probably picks partners who she feels superior to and that she probably bullies them.
The power and gender dynamics of a same sex relationship can be complicated but I would guess that Jack always likes to be top dog, her fragile, ill, smol pixie charade notwithstanding. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to have Jack playing out her tit, with its accompanying rages, lying and manipulation. For Leggy and LJC, there must have been an initial spark of attraction and feelings of love and I imagine it took a lot of strength and perspective to realise their love wasn't ever going to be enough for Jack and that she was likely to suck them dry.
So, I personally hold a space of compassion for anyone who's been in an intimate relationship with Jack. I know she would've flattened me and hollowed me out and I wouldn't have understood what was going on at all until I was wrecked by her.
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